January 1
- What will happen to you if I die
- no ifs.
January 2
If I die, what will Feng Hua do
Feng Hua's power is controlled by emotions. Extreme emotions will make his power explode. If he collapses because of my death, it will be a terrible threat to all mankind. And he can't control himself at all, he will be completely occupied by the desire to destroy... At that time, no one can kill him. And he'll turn into a terrifying killing machine.
Simply unimaginable.
January 3
I like to sit in the yard and watch the sunrise and sunset, the outlines of the city, and the tall astronomical tower, and I always feel that every now and then, I seem to hear subtle voices from up there—familiar and sweet words of love.
Feng Hua said it was too cold, and always let me watch it in the room.
But the cold is also one of the things I want to experience.
In addition to cold, there are warm, slightly cool, hot, piping hot...
How many more sunrises and sunsets can I see
January 4
I coughed up blood. Feng Hua cried.
I found that there were large and small Fenghua in the room.
The young Feng Hua, he hugged my leg, his face was swollen from crying; the young Feng Hua, he sat on the sofa and looked at me melancholy; the monster state Feng Hua, he roared and destroyed The kitchen; and the elegant, young Feng Hua, who stood quietly beside me, held my hand gently, kept taking care of me, and asked me: Are you alright
January 5
The hospital is really too responsible and keeps calling me.
Now everyone knows that I am seriously ill. Even the director came to visit several times, hoping that I would be hospitalized as soon as possible.
But they don't know that if I go to the hospital, then I will spend the rest of my short life in the hospital, constantly operating, constantly taking medicine, and I really don't want to spend the rest of my life in pain.
January 6
I dreamed that I was standing on the highest place in the world, and suddenly the whole world was burning, and all human beings were turned into charred corpses. I woke up in a dream, Feng Hua hugged me, and again, he let me see the open fields, broke through the clouds, and took me to see the whole world. I remembered his dream, he kept saying, to go around the world in an air travel boat with me.
January 7
I suggested to Feng Hua to take an air cruise. He was very happy, very happy.
January 8
My illness got worse.
January 10
Countless nightmares, countless hallucinations, inability to distinguish between reality and fantasy.
Countless times I thought about death, what a lovely word death is, countless times, I wanted to cut open my own skin and see what's inside.
…
On the quiet night of January 21st, Feng Yeran propped himself up, looked at Feng Hua in his sleep in the dim moonlight, gently stroked his cheek with his cold fingers, traced the bridge of his nose, his lips, his jaw.
Because he added something to Feng Hua's milk, Feng Hua won't wake up for a while.
He carefully traced Feng Hua's neck. In the drawer, there is a very sharp fruit knife.
Although he is very weak now, he still knows how to kill Feng Hua.
First cut off his artery with a knife, and then inject him with drugs that inhibit cell growth, which is enough to kill him in one night.
He got out of bed, opened the drawer, and took out the knife.
The blade is so sharp, shining with cold light.
He slowly put the knife on Feng Hua's fair neck.
He seemed to be able to feel Feng Hua's carotid artery beating suddenly.
This artery, connected to his throbbing heart, the moment he cut it, Feng Hua's human body would instantly turn into a monster, he would howl, struggle, and he would work hard to repair the wound, but when injected With enough drugs, his death was irreversible.
But it's also possible that he won't struggle at all.
Feng Hua once said: You created me, and you are also qualified to kill me. It is also a pleasure to be killed by you.
However, Feng Yeran didn't expect that he couldn't do anything at all.
The memories of two too many, too good, and too heavy almost suffocated him, and the knife fell to the ground.
Slowly, he found his coat, put it on his body, put on his slippers, and walked out of the door like a sleepwalker.
It was cold outside, and it was snowing heavily.
He was walking on the street, passing the pedestrian street that was still brightly lit in the middle of the night. The ethereal melody of a music box came from the jewelry store, the cry of a baby came from upstairs, the dog barked, and the midnight sky train flew overhead.
Probably because he hadn't gone out for a long time, all the colors became fresh, like neon colors painted with oil pastels, the girl in high heels smiled at him at the door of the bar, and he couldn't help laughing. up.
Walking through the heavy streets, he stepped into a forest.
The snow here is thicker and there are fewer people. He is not cold.
It's not that his senses are dull, in fact, his senses are abnormally sensitive.
In the whistling wind, he could hear the sound of branches being crushed by the heavy snow, the sound of snowflakes rustling and falling, and the subtle sound of squirrels running past the trees.
In the dark sky, with no stars and no moon, dark gray clouds gathered and blended together, and the velvet outlines were quite beautiful.
The farther he went, the more excited he became.
The hot air gushing out of his lungs was white and seemed to soon turn into clouds in the sky.
Among the various subtle sounds, he heard music, music from nowhere, soft and bewitching. He heard someone, calling him somewhere, tenderly, eagerly.
He saw the clock tower.
I saw the tall astronomical tower behind the clock tower.
That was the astronomical tower he stared at every day recently. He knew that once, he had admired the beautiful starry sky on it.
His heart was pounding.
He walked into the Astronomy Tower, and he followed the ladder to the top floor.
He walked in the night sky and watched the whole world snow, and it was snowing heavily.
He found a door that seemed to be specially made for him.
So he happily opened the door.
He stood at the top of the Astronomy Tower, the fierce wind blew against his skin, his clothes and hair fluttered, he was not afraid.
Closing his eyes, he listened.
Listening to the sound of snowflakes falling.
Listen to the wind.
Listen to the breath of the whole city.
Sure enough, among these voices, he heard murmurs.
Someone was looking at him, talking to him, ah, he could feel that person's gaze, familiar and affectionate.
He searched.
Then, he found it.
That person, standing at the bottom of the Astronomy Tower, is 99 floors away from him.
He didn't know why he could see so clearly, but he saw that that person was Feng Hua.
He looked at himself at the bottom of the astronomical tower and smiled, his smile was so bright and wonderful, it was like the dawn, and at this moment, the whole dark night was lit up.
He said: Ye Er, Ye Er.
He said: Come on, here I am.
Feng Yeran was so pleasantly surprised, he looked at his Feng Hua, on the ground, slowly, extremely tenderly, opened his arms for him.
without hesitation.
Feng Yeran jumped down.
…
Feng Hua's heart throbbed, and the next moment, his body disappeared from the bed.
He saw with his own eyes his Ye'er, falling at an extremely fast speed.
There was no time to react at all. His human body cracked, and countless tentacles/horns grew infinitely. He used all his strength to entangle the man in the air, gently protect him, and bring him to the ground.
"Ye'er! Ye'er! Are you okay?!" Feng Hua's face was only half human.
"... Feng... Hua... "
Feng Hua was going crazy, his eyes were red: "What the hell happened to you... why did you jump off! Do you hate me so much and don't want to be with me?! If I'm a second later, you'll..."
"Feng Hua, it's almost over."
"what????"
At such a moment, Feng Hua heard the bell, and even faintly heard the sacred music.
thump... thump...
Holy, yet heavy and terrible.
He started having headaches again, and he seemed to finally understand why he was so afraid of the bell.
Feng Yeran looked at Feng Hua with a smile on his pale face: "Originally, I have forgotten... but... just now... when I jumped down... I... remember..."
"What are you talking about?!" Feng Hua's voice was very nasal, and God knows how much his heart hurts.
Feng Yeran raised his hand and was immediately held by Feng Hua.
… thump…
Feng Yeran's voice was soft: "Feng Hua, why don't you believe it, I love you?"
"I believe it... I believe it!" Big drops of hot liquid fell on Feng Yeran's face and neck.
"No...you don't believe it. The person who stopped me from loving you...isn't...you?"
"me… "
… thump…
"Feng Hua... You are really... Silly child... Silly child... Silly child... Obviously... Know... I just hope... You are happy... Open... Heart... of... "
… thump…
… thump…
Feng Yeran's body was heavy, and he closed his eyes.
Feng Hua's ears pressed firmly against Feng Yeran's chest, trying to hear his heartbeat.
However, there is only silence and gradually icy coldness.
Feng Hua hugged Feng Yeran with all his strength, opened his mouth, but made no sound.
In fact, the whole world lost its voice.
Lost all colors.
All movement was lost.
This huge and terrifyingly advanced, complex and delicate world suddenly stopped functioning, and even the snowflakes in the sky stopped moving.
Feng Hua hugged a person who was as cute as a child, a person who was sleeping peacefully, walking in the dark and dead world.
The tall astronomical tower looks like a child's doodle.
Aerial orbits around the world are drawn with crayons.
Pedestrians on the street are paper people.
Sean is drawn with a water pen, crouching on the ground and smoking a cigarette.
Qin Xihe was sitting on a chair drinking tea, the paper body swayed slightly, and her lips were moving: spring, summer, autumn and winter, and again and again.
In front of Feng Hua, a small soft bed appeared.
Feng Hua gently put Feng Yeran on top, covered him with a quilt, leaned down, and kissed his forehead gently.
"Ye'er, get a good night's sleep," he said softly. "Don't worry, I won't leave you. I won't let this end like this."
Then, he raised his finger, and a flame appeared on his index finger, like a red and blue eyeball.
Gently, he threw the flame out, far, far away.
In an instant, the whole world was on fire.
This world starts from the edge, is collapsing, is being destroyed, and is being burned, but Fenghua doesn't care.
High-rise buildings are in ruins, and paper people dance in flames.
Feng Hua sat on the ground with his back to the side of the bed, holding Feng Yeran's cold hand, and warming it with his lips and cheeks from time to time.
He stared at the blazing fire of the whole world.
He finally knew why he always missed the feeling of being burned by fire, he knew how painful it would be. Why is his Ye Er, always complaining to him, always seeing scorched corpses. He even joked with him and asked him, do you know what it tasted like when you were born? His Ye Er laughed happily and said, you stink, um, don't mention it, rancid smell. By the way, there is also a, um, burnt smell... Although I don't understand why you are so fragrant now!
He laughed in the fire.
He cried in the fire.
In the midst of the fire, the white shadow flew towards him.
"Finally, the wall is built." Bai Ying said.
Feng Hua did not respond.
Bai Ying floated beside him and said to him: "Now, you know, from beginning to end, you and your Ye'er are in the world that you copied and created according to your own memory, the name of this world, It's called a 'wall'. But why is it a wall, it means that although it is huge in content, covering more than eight years of things, it is incomplete, narrow, part of the content is even distorted, it is not absolute reality."
Bai Ying held up his head: "Feng Hua, do you want to find the truth?"
"… "
"You need to build your house. Do you remember, actually, 'Wall' is the second story, you've already fixed the first story 'Roof', after that, you need to build 'Doors' and 'Chimneys' ', just like when you were a child, building blocks and kneading plasticine, little by little, build up the house, make the division into a whole, find the key... Only then can all these meaningless cycles end, and you can achieve reality. "
"reality?"
"You don't want to know, what happened between the two of you? Why did you create such a world, why did you burn yourself over and over again, his truest feelings for you, and the way to solve it..."
"...It doesn't matter, I just want to be with him."
"Feng Hua, I really don't want to see you, the pain goes on again and again."
Like a flood, the flames have come.
There was fire in Feng Hua's eyes, and he asked indifferently, "How am I related to you? Who are you?"
"Me?" Bai Ying smiled in the firelight and gradually disappeared, "I am the one who will always be by your side, the one who will always protect you. As long as you remember, I will save you, that's enough."
—End of "The Wall" of "Monster"
The author has something to say:
Thank you very much Ming Lan for throwing a grenade, love you! Many thanks to Uncle Lunzi, Du Yi, Fengboqiao, puff haha, 27756811 for the landmines thrown, ah ah!
Seeing that the world is created or copied, you may feel like "Mad Men", but in fact, this text is more complex than the structure of Mad Men. The preface of "Monster" is really important, whether it be kneading plasticine or building blocks, it is the structure of this article.
26 chapters have been brewed, and I finally write this chapter, I am very cold. There are many brewing points, such as why this volume is called "The Wall", why Feng Hua stubbornly called Feng Yeran "Ye'er" when he was born, why Feng Hua is afraid of the sound of bells (the specific reasons will be explained later), Why is Feng Yeran's diary called Diary II...
Regarding the point of "burning", I wonder if anyone has noticed the sentence in Chapter 1: "As soon as I walked into the operating room, I smelled a strong rancid odor, blood, and a faint, burnt smell." Why is there a burnt smell if it has never been burned? I still remember Feng Hua's behavior of burning his skin with fire, seeing the hallucination of burning in the room, and thinking that the pain of being burned is familiar; everyone must remember Feng Yeran's continuous Nightmares and hallucinations, he always sees charred corpses, so these are memories and omens.
The structure has been outlined in this chapter, but there are important points left unaddressed. All are welcome to discuss.
PS, "Wall" is the longest and most important part, "Roof" etc. I will actually write very, very short.
roof