In the second month of living together, my work also entered the crematorium mode at the end of the year.
Around July and August, our group has received notices from major brands on Double Eleven. There are so many briefs that I can’t even speak C language in my heart, but what can I do? After the collapse, I can only face it with a smile.
Overtime hours have increased significantly, and the time spent with Lu Chengze has also decreased significantly. Every night at seven o'clock, I tell him to go home first, instead of picking me up at the company or meeting at the subway station.
Because I don't know when I can go back.
But no matter how late he gets home, he still hasn't rested, at the door, on the sofa, or in front of the computer.
Holding him and complaining became the Nikkei.
During the day at the company, I always step on high-heeled shoes, like an exquisite and sharp killer. At night, it becomes a small train that burns out diesel, and I only hang my head and whine.
It's been repeating for a while.
Lu Cheng would listen and comfort him, but today, he made a suggestion: "I'm always so tired, should I consider changing jobs?"
I subconsciously straightened up and retorted: "If I'm tired, I change jobs. If it doesn't feel right, should I change someone?"
Lu Cheng probably didn't expect me to say this, so he fell silent.
I looked at his quiet face, stepped back from his lap, and went to wash.
I know that my words are a bit too much. The moment I turn my head, my nose starts to feel sore, because of the tired and tedious work during the day... All kinds of things, I brought these scorched emotions to my power bank, my little panda. He is innocent.
What will he think of me.
I closed the door and sat on the toilet for a long time.
After reflection, I took out my phone, found WeChat and pinned it to the top, and the first second I opened the chat box, my heart palpitated, because the top display said, "The other party is typing."
He wants to message me.
Maybe I clicked into the dialog box at the same time, and Lu Cheng discovered my existence, in the same interface.
He stopped and changed back to "Little Panda".
Then the video pops up.
I connected without hesitation.
We look at each other.
In the camera, he is looking down, and the angle of death is so beautiful.
He seemed to be pondering my position, his eyes studied: "Are you constipated?"
When I saw myself in the small window, the corners of my lips curled up: "No."
I know I've been in the bathroom too long, because I'm running away, because I'm too introspective.
"I'm going to break in if I don't come out again." He threatened.
I burst into laughter from my nose, and also observed where he was, the white wall, unable to guess.
I said, "Don't disturb, I'm thinking about it behind closed doors."
He frowned slightly, as if puzzled: "What have you been thinking about?"
I said, "I didn't speak very well just now, and I just shook my head and left."
I took a deep breath: "Actually, it stabbed me at that moment, and I suddenly felt that I was like a job in my hands. I like it, and I can live in harmony at ordinary times, but at certain times, it will become difficult and difficult. Nasty, I'm afraid you'll see me that way too."
Lu Cheng was silent for two seconds: "Why do you think so?"
Bare-bellied people are always vulnerable, I shook my head in confusion and depression: "I don't know. Maybe because... I'm not the kind of person who can easily change jobs, even the hardships are temporary, just get through it. This kind of moment I have been facing it for three years, the first two years without you, but this year with you, you are still the same, emotionally stable, but I have to switch to another mode, busy and restless, unable to stay happy all the time, still I'm afraid you will feel left out. When you said this today, I inexplicably got involved, and my emotions surged up, I shouldn't have done this."
Lu Chengze said, "You treat me like a job."
I'm very wrong: "When did I treat you as a job?"
"I'm not your colleague and superior. What's wrong with me being emotional."
I pursed my lips and felt the position of my heart soften: "But since we live together, you haven't turned your face on me."
Lu Chengze said, "Is it a deal to fall in love? Crying face for crying face, smiling face for smiling face, cares about everything, aren't you tired?"
"I'm afraid you'll feel tired, wait for me like this every day, listen to my bitterness, double 11 is over and double 12 is over, it's all over."
It is unimaginable that my dopamine is about to be tested by reality before our love period is over.
"I'm tired because you are like this," he sighed, his voice helpless and sarcastic: "If you don't come out, the toilet is more fragrant than me, right?"
I smiled: "Okay, okay, go out now."
Hanging up the call, I walked out of the bathroom, Lu Chengze was at the door, holding the phone in one hand, looking down at me with a half smile.
I glared at him and he dragged me directly into his arms.
I wrapped my arms around his waist and hugged him tightly. I smelled a faint fragrance on his body, a fragrance that only I could smell when I was so close. It was warm, orange-colored, on the coast, and in the setting sun of summer.
I was trapped in it, not wanting to pull away at all, and whispered, "You also find something to do."
"I go to work every day," he said.
I said, "I mean off work. I don't want you waiting for me like a puppy every night."
He also followed me in folded words: "What kind of puppy dog can play games while waiting for his wife?"
The sudden and natural unfamiliar title made me stunned for a while, but I didn't correct it or point it out. Instead, I secretly rejoiced: "Lu Cheng, the only one from this family, is a puppy."
His "oh" sounded unflattering, but I knew he must be smiling from an angle I couldn't see.
I continued to coax: "No matter what you say, I will feel guilty. I will think, what should I do, I'm so busy today that I don't have time to make my boyfriend happy."
Lu Cheng smiled, bursting above my head like a small bright firework: "I'm very happy now, thank you."
I raised my lips, equally happy.
We changed back to two big happy, heart-to-heart.
Lu Chengze's heart seemed to have a visual function. He held my face up with both hands, and he was not allowed to have fun in the dark. He just wanted to pierce me: "Is this still the feeling?"
I looked at him: "How do you feel?"
He also looked at me: "It feels right."
I said, "It always has been."
He said, "OK, don't worry."
After taking a shower and returning to the bed, I lay my head on Lu Chengze’s chest and play with my mobile phone. After checking and replying to work WeChat, I put the mobile phone upside down in front of me, remembering the text message he hadn’t sent in the bathroom just now.
I asked curiously, "What did you want to say to me just now? I typed it on WeChat for a long time."
He didn't hesitate: "I want to ask you how long you have to stay in the bathroom, but there is not much time to see you every day."
I don't believe it: "Really?"
Lu Cheng said: "Otherwise why would I post a video."
I put away my phone, sat up, and faced him: "Then you can take a look, I'll stop doing anything, and I'll show you with all my heart."
He was next to the pillow, his posture was lazy, but his eyebrows and eyes were focused and concentrated.
Who can resist being looked at like this, I don't open my eyes.
He couldn't help laughing and returned to normal.
I said, "I just clicked on your WeChat at the time."
He said, "I saw it," and asked, "What do you want to say?"
I would say...
In fact, I didn't think about what to say at the time, I just opened WeChat with a feeling of guilt and reconciliation, and it was not clear how to write.
Just open the window and see that the other party is already standing behind the window, also concerned and worried, at that time, no words are worth a thousand words.
But at this moment, I thought about what to say, and I said: "When the end of the year is over, let's go out and play, stay away from work, and I will compensate you."
"Where do you want to go?"
"Where do you want to go?"
We threw the same question at the same time, and the tacit understanding was like a harmony in a song.
Lu Cheng picked up his mobile phone and looked at it: "Well, it's 1 o'clock. Let's each think about it for a few minutes. After 1 o'clock, we will share a song with each other to see where we are going."
Afraid of being caught by a glimpse of the answer, I moved half a meter away and started to rummage through the playlist, which was about place names and also about scenery. Finally, my finger stopped on one of them.
I looked at Lu Chengze and announced in advance, "I've found it."
His eyelashes were slightly raised: "I've also found it."
With a sense of ceremony, we counted down 3-2-1- together and shared it.
The same song, at the same moment, appeared in the same chat box, but from two people:
"Want to go to the beach"
Help, how can it be the same.
Is he a magician? I was surprised and happy, incredible: "Why can't you think of anything else?"
Lu Cheng turned his phone to me, slightly proud: "Because I'm also on your playlist."