When Jingxiu woke up, there seemed to be a patter of rain outside, the curtains in the room were still drawn, and the time was drowsy. She habitually went to find Ji Youyan, turned around and the pillow was empty, and Ji Youyan was not by her side.
Jingxiu looked at the alarm clock placed on the opposite bedside table, it turned out that it was almost noon. She rubbed her forehead and sat up with a sour body.
There were light footsteps outside the door, Jingxiu followed the sound, and Ji Youyan pushed the door open.
She was wearing simple shorts and a big T-shirt, looking like an ordinary home life. Seeing that Jingxiu had already sat up, she approached Jingxiu, bent over naturally, reached out to help Jingxiu straighten her messy hair, kissed her forehead dotingly and said, "Are you awake? Are you feeling sick? I was a little bit sick yesterday. No restraint."
It seems to be a scene that I have longed for countless times in my half-sleep and half-awake dreams. There were ripples in Jingxiu's heart, and he replied "It's okay" unnaturally.
"Have you been awake for a long time?" She changed the subject hoarsely.
Ji Youyan straightened her waist, stroked her face with her eyes, and smiled lightly: "Just a little bit earlier than you. Are you hungry?"
I don't know if the light around is too dim and ambiguous, but Jingxiu felt for a moment that Ji Youyan's expression seemed to contain something other than gentleness.
"A little." Jingxiu looked at Ji Youyan.
But before he could investigate further, Ji Youyan turned around and went to the window, opened the curtains, and said casually: "Then go wash up, I'm ready for breakfast. Do you want to bring it in and eat it at this bay window? It's raining outside, while Having breakfast and listening to the rain will make me feel very comfortable.”
Jingxiu's eyes fell on the gloomy sky outside, and it sure was raining. "It's all good." She suppressed the strange feeling just now, took her clothes and walked to the bathroom, and said with concern, "Where are Xiaoxiao and Yueyue? Have you eaten?"
Ji Youyan answered her calmly: "After eating, they went out. It's rare to be able to sneak around for two days, so I gave them a holiday and let them wander around freely. Do you mind?"
"What if I mind?" Jingxiu teased her.
Ji Youyan smiled and said, "Then I can only compensate myself to... you." The smile in her tone suddenly faded away as the words faded, and the last "you" Jingxiu could hardly hear.
Jingxiu frowned, closed the electric toothbrush, and Ji Youyan's voice came in again: "Assistant Yao Xiao No. 2 is online, may I ask what master needs me to do for you?"
The voice is from far to near, "Do you need me to undress and take off your clothes for you?"
Jingxiu relaxed, sneered, reached out and closed the bathroom door relentlessly, locking it by the way.
She changed out of her pajamas and found the hickey under her collarbone in the mirror. She touched it lightly with her fingertips, and a shy and soft smile appeared on her cold face.
Outside the bathroom across the door, Ji Youyan stood for a long time, the circles of his eyes gradually turning red.
After Jingxiu finished washing up, Ji Youyan had already put breakfast on the small table by the bay window. With her long legs crossed, she leaned against the window frame and looked out the window, her long hair blocked her expression, but Jingxiu could keenly perceive the desolation in her figure.
Her mood also dropped suddenly, and she sat cross-legged across from Ji Youyan. Ji Youyan regained his senses, and smiled at her with the corners of his mouth twitched.
"Why are you unhappy?" Jingxiu was silent for two seconds before asking straight to the point.
Ji Youyan was stunned for a moment, his mouth seemed to be trying to hide something, and Jingxiu added firmly: "Since I woke up just now, your mood has not been very high."
She thought for a while, then poked the red heart and said, "So, what happened last night or when I didn't wake up in the morning?"
Ji Yuyan was amazed at how sensitive she was to her emotions and was speechless. She slid her throat and admitted with difficulty: "Axiu, I'm really not in a good mood. But, you eat first, and I'll talk to you after you finish eating, okay?" I don't know how to unravel these things in a short time. Jingxiu's question just gave her the opportunity to speak.
But Ji Youyan felt distressed that Jingxiu was tired all night, and until now there was no dripping water, afraid that they would not be able to eat well after talking about it.
Jingxiu's heart was up and down, her eyebrows furrowed even tighter, and she said seriously, "Now that I'm like this, do you think I can eat it?" She couldn't guess why Ji Youyan was worried, but her intuition was very serious. matter.
Ji Youyan showed a sad expression, but he stopped talking. Jingxiu felt distressed and asked her with a sigh, "What about yours?"
"I've eaten it." Thinking that Jingxiu didn't know what the price was, and that the strange pain in her body might have been caused by the price, Ji Youyan had no appetite for breakfast at all.
Jingxiu was obviously not convinced. She picked up the knife and fork and distributed half of the meal to Ji Youyan, which was a bit threatening: "You accompany me to eat a little more."
Ji Youyan understood what she meant, and had to accompany her to dinner obediently. The two chewed quietly, only the sound of the rain pouring outside the window could be heard in the room.
Food does not taste.
"Can we talk now?" After Ji Youyan put down the meal and stopped eating, Jingxiu also put it down. She took the wet wipes handed by Ji Youyan, wiped her hands and mouth, and looked at Ji Youyan solemnly.
Ji Youyan looked at Jingxiu with deep eyes. She was actually terrified, afraid that the past life suddenly imposed on them would cause cracks in the rare peace in this life, and that the truth that was about to be torn apart would be so cruel that the happiness they had at the moment would become fleeting. of bubbles. But she still answered very lightly: "Yeah."
If she doesn't ask clearly, she won't be able to feel at ease from now on.
She slowly took something out of the pocket of her trousers, stretched it out in front of Jingxiu, and spread it out—the red safety button was lying quietly in her palm.
Jingxiu's heart thumped, but he still forced his composure, trying to stop by stillness.
"Is this a medium?" Ji Youyan was surprised.
This question was completely unexpected to Jingxiu, and Jingxiu did not respond for a while.
"What medium? What are you talking about?" She subconsciously covered it up, but the panic that flashed across her face was still captured by Ji Yuyan.
Ji Youyan knew that he should have guessed correctly, his open hand trembled uncontrollably, his voice was soft, but loud: "We are reborn, or the medium of the reverse flow of time."
At this point, the layer of veil that had been trapped between them was completely uncovered.
Jingxiu looked at Ji Youyan in disbelief, and was stunned. What does this sentence mean
She knows that she is reborn, and she also knows that she is reborn? Did she... just learn that she was reborn, or did she know it all along? No, not right. She should have found out long ago that Yanyan had been hiding too well. Yan Yan should always be in a state of rebirth, otherwise how could he change his mentality in such a short period of time...
Thousands of thoughts flashed through Jingxiu's mind, and he was flustered. Why has it been hidden all the time but suddenly revealed? Did she suddenly remember something she shouldn't know? !
"I don't understand, what are you talking about?" Jingxiu tried his best to calm down, afraid that Ji Youyan was just testing her. But her voice was shaking uncontrollably.
Ji Youyan was more and more sure of his conjecture, knowing that Jingxiu must have paid something and didn't want to burden him, so he tried his best to hide it. With water vapor in her eyes, she held Jingxiu's hand, and her voice became hoarse because of her restraint: "Axiu, don't lie to me anymore, I already remembered it all, I'm sorry I didn't remember it until now."
She spoke so truthfully, Jingxiu's face was moved, and her eyes gradually became complex that Ji Youyan couldn't distinguish. Like deep pain, but also like boundless nostalgia and affection.
The rift that once went wrong and never saw each other again seemed to lie between them suddenly.
Jingxiu opened his mouth, but couldn't find his voice. She didn't know what to say, and she was afraid to say too much. She was still not sure what the scope of what Ji Youyan said was "remembered".
Ji Youyan saw that Jingxiu didn't speak, took a breath, and Guzi continued: "Axiu, I was reborn in May last year, I guess you should be reborn a little earlier than me, so you can help me Make all arrangements, including getting Tao to sign me early and help me take care of my parents. When I first came back, I wondered if I was dreaming. Before or now, one was a dream, or my fantasy. But I verified Several times, it was finally confirmed that it was not a dream, whether it was in the past or now. I really died once and was reborn again."
Jingxiu's breathing became heavy when he heard the word "death", and the knuckles of his hand clasped on the table turned white.
"I always thought that God had mercy on me and gave me a chance to correct my mistakes. Until last night..." Ji Youyan's voice was filled with tears: "It wasn't until last night when I held this piece of jade and my memories came back, I didn't When I really think about it, it's not God's favor at all, it's you, it's me, Axiu, who you switched back to regardless..."
"Axiu, you came back after my death, got this jade, remembered what Master Daokong once said, and begged my mother not to cremate me, maybe there is a way. But my mother thinks you are talking nonsense, not only If you don’t believe me, you will still drive you away. But you are not willing to give up your life, so you still embark on the road to find Master Daokong. You paid a heavy price and made an exchange with Master Daokong, and then Master Daokong did the dharma for you. In exchange for our replay..." She actually remembered very fragmentary, but she looked at Jingxiu and was sure that what she said should be inseparable.
"Axiu, we finally got back to the present, do you really want to hide it from me? Do you want me to feel guilty for so long?" Ji Youyan clenched Jingxiu's slender hand, unable to hold back her emotions, she burst into tears Rolling down big.
Jingxiu's throat was aching, and his heart was broken into pieces. She quivered her lips, and the lingering tears hanging on her eyelashes finally slid down her cheeks.
Ji Yuyan was right.
Those days that she had been hiding in her heart and dared not recall, finally unavoidably surfaced in her mind.
All the costs are not terrible, the terrible thing is to live in a world where Ji Yuyan is no longer - knowing so clearly and clearly that Ji Yuyan is gone.
For the rest of her life, love or hate, she will never see her again. Like, those unforgettable memories are just a crazy dream of her for 23 years.