That night, Shi Yi acted as if nothing had happened. After Fu Shitian finished washing the clothes, they reviewed their books for a while, turned off the lights and went to bed.
The weather was very cold, and the quilt was icy at night. Fu Shitian would always warm the quilt for her before she went to bed and then move to his position. When Fu Shitian was still asleep, Shi Yi always liked to lie on his side, put his hands on her waist, face her, and half hug her to sleep. Occasionally, when he was in the mood, Shi Yi would hug and kiss her and start a sweet bedtime exercise with her.
But not tonight. She went to bed, said "good night" to Fu Shitian, and lay on her back. She wrapped one arm around herself in the quilt, closed her eyes, and looked extremely sleepy.
Fu Shitian was a little surprised, but she didn't think much about it. After all, Shi Yi's behavior was normal all night. She thought Shi Yi was just too tired and didn't have this thought. The postgraduate entrance examination has entered the final sprint stage. There are still a lot of messy things in their college this semester. The defense was even more bizarrely arranged in the last semester, just three days after the end of the postgraduate entrance examination. As a result, the tutor has frequently requested interviews and group meetings recently, making the already tight time even more tense. It's really annoying. She can understand Shi Yi's pressure.
She did not disturb Shi Yi, but reached out to tuck the corners of the quilt for her carefully, and then lay down on her side on the pillow closest to her.
Her breath, warm and gentle, seemed to linger in Shi Yi's ears, as gentle and lovable as she was.
Shi Yi was deeply confused after hearing this.
She didn't want to believe, nor should she believe, that Fu Shitian would waver in their feelings in the slightest. She should have known how much Fu Shitian liked her and how determined he was in their feelings, but the moment she should have opened her mouth to ask, she backed down.
She clearly felt her own timidity. It was not her character to escape, but she did it anyway. She found herself afraid. She didn't know where the source of her fear came from. Perhaps it was because the news in the text message was too accurate, or because Fu Shitian never talked to her about family matters, or perhaps it was because they had both experienced the difficulties of life in the past six months.
She already understood too well what her mother said: "Life is not as simple as you think." It is not impossible for people to change, become weak, and compromise under such circumstances and pressure... After all, this is also human nature.
But there was another voice in her head telling her: Si Tian was not such a person. The person she loved would not be such a person. She should know best how sincere and beautiful she was.
It was really too much for her to use such thoughts to speculate Si Tian and not even give her a chance to defend herself. Shi Yi condemned herself, but could not completely convince herself.
In pain and confusion, she stayed awake for most of the night.
As the night gradually faded and the sky was about to brighten, she felt that Fu Shitian was half asleep and half awake, and he unconsciously reached out to touch the corner of her quilt and helped her lift the quilt.
It was a kind of love that was almost instinctive.
Shi Yi turned around and looked at her, her breathing heavy. She used her eyes to carefully trace her clean and soft facial features, and began to feel guilty and regretful.
She should have been honest, should have believed her, should have talked to her.
She made up her mind.
The next day at noon, Shi Yi came back from studying in the library. Fu Shitian had already prepared two dishes and a soup for her as usual. The two sat opposite each other, eating and chatting casually.
Shi Yi was thinking about how to ask her about the text message when Fu Shitian's phone rang. www.
The caller ID showed "Grandma". Fu Shitian greeted Shi Yi embarrassedly, picked up the phone and went to the balcony to answer the call.
Shi Yi took a sip of soup, put down the spoon, stared at the bowl, and didn't move for several seconds.
It was always like this. Fu Shitian would try to avoid her answering all calls related to home. In fact, there was nothing wrong with this. It was the right thing to do from a polite point of view. For a long time, she had not directly expressed anything to Fu Shitian about this. However, at this moment, Shi Yi felt strongly uncomfortable. She deeply felt the loneliness and uneasiness of being isolated from a certain world of Fu Shitian.
This was an emotion that she had been able to suppress and resolve rationally in the past.
But at this moment, she was a little overwhelmed.
She ate two more mouthfuls of food without any taste in her mouth, and watched Fu Shitian hang up the phone and turn to come in. She thought that she should tell her feelings honestly.
But when Fu Shitian sat down at the table again and looked at her tenderly, she moved her throat, but couldn't open her mouth or put down her pride to say such fragile words that came from the heart.
It seems that the closer you are to someone, the harder it is to say some things.
After a few seconds of silence, she asked nonchalantly, "Is grandma okay?"
Fu Shitian said succinctly: "Not bad."
Shi Yi could see that she didn't want to talk more. If it was normal, she would stop there, but today, she didn't change the subject and asked, "Did she ask you to go back to see her on the weekend?"
Fu Shitian said "hmm" softly, paused, and added: "But I turned it down. If she is okay in the next two weeks, I will go back every other week before the postgraduate entrance examination."
Shi Yi knew why. After a moment of silence, she said, "It doesn't matter to me."
Fu Shitian smiled lightly and said, "For me, it does matter."
Shi Yi also forced a smile, lowered his eyelids, and asked casually: "What do you usually do when you go back home?"
Fu Shitian answered naturally: "I look after her, accompany her, cook for her, and feed her at home. But she doesn't have much time to talk."
Shi Yi felt heavy-hearted. She felt sorry for her hard work and felt bad... She wanted to test her. But she still tried to test her. She asked her, "What does she talk to you about when she is in high spirits?"
Fu Shitian was stunned for a moment, speechless, and his expression was obviously not as natural as before.
Without waiting for her answer, Shi Yi half-jokingly continued to ask: "Will you care about your lifelong event and urge you to go on blind dates and find a partner?"
Fu Shitian's heart trembled, and her breathing almost stopped. In a flash, many thoughts flashed through her mind, and in the end, she said weakly: "Fortunately, it won't happen."
She knew how possessive and jealous Shi Yi was of her, and she didn't want to add to Shi Yi's troubles or distract him at this time. Now, the most important thing was to help Shi Yi do well in this exam, and everything else could be put off until later.
She can handle it. As if she felt guilty, or as if she wanted to make Shi Yi feel more at ease, she added: "Besides, even if I don't want to, she can't do anything about it."
Shi Yi's heart turned cold in an instant.
She lied.
She lied to her, honestly.
Her heart was empty and her mind was in a mess. For a moment, she didn't know how to face Fu Shitian's face.
If she doesn't have to go if she doesn't want to, then the fact that she went and met the person does not mean that she wanted to go and was willing to go
Shi Yi couldn't convince herself anymore. She felt as if some pillar of faith in her heart had collapsed. She couldn't ask any more questions, and she didn't have the courage to ask.
She wasn't sure if she asked him directly, the answer would be one she wasn't ready to accept. She still seemed to love her, or couldn't bear to let her go? If she didn't ask, would she have a chance to keep the illusion of peace like now, until... something happened.
So, unlike herself, she once again remained silent and escaped like a coward.
But some things, once they happened, have already happened. No matter how hard she tried, she couldn't force herself to be free of grudges and unaffected. Especially now that she paid attention, she would notice that Fu Shitian often avoided her when chatting on WeChat.
Fu Shitian found that Shi Yi had become more silent than before, maybe two days ago, or three days ago. It wasn't that she didn't talk to her. If she talked to her, she would respond. She just didn't seem to take the initiative to talk to her or share with her.
No matter how cold it was at night, she would not hug her.
She always had her back to her, leaving her with a thin and cold back. Even if she shamelessly approached and hugged her from behind with trembling hands, she would just pretend to sleep. She would not turn around and would not give her any response.
Fu Shitian was in pain and at a loss.
She didn't know what happened, but she realized that something was wrong between her and Shi Yi. Even though they were lying on the same bed, even though she was hugging Shi Yi so intimately, she felt that she could not feel Shi Yi's warmth.
There seemed to be a deep ravine between them. The cold wind rushed into the quilt and filled their bodies, bringing bone-chilling cold and pain.
Fu Shitian looked up at the dark ceiling, and every day she couldn't tell whether she had really slept at night. She was becoming more and more uncertain whether this love, which had lasted till now, still had any meaning for Shi Yi. But no matter what, there was only one week left, so she had to wait a little longer, and be patient until the exam was over.
She demanded this of herself.
So they pretended to be calm, enduring and tormenting each other.
The author has something to say: Love is magical.
It makes people brave, but also makes them cowardly;
Can be so indestructible,
Yet it can also be so vulnerable.
We should break up in the next chapter. ,,Website m..net,... :