Augusta was wearing a nightgown, with disheveled hair, sleepy eyes, a toothbrush in his mouth, and white foam overflowing from the corner of his mouth. He opened the door in bewilderment, and outside the door stood an impatient courier and a huge box.
"Sir, your package and letter." The courier rudely pushed a letter to Augusta, and put a pen under his eyelid, "Please sign for it!"
Augusta took the pen and signed her name hastily. The courier seemed to have a grudge against the waybill, tore it off, put it in his arms, and slammed the door with a "bang".
What a bad attitude! Augusta lowered his head to search for the name of the courier company on the waybill, and secretly vowed in his heart that he would never use their service in the future.
The package and the letter were from his friend (accurately, a bad friend whom he wished he had never met) Cavodian. Such a big box is enough to hold corpses, what kind of weird things did that guy send
Whispering inwardly, the magician Augusta walked towards the bathroom, throwing the letter on the coffee table in the living room. He finished brushing his teeth in the bathroom, washed his face casually, and came to the kitchen without even shaving. Open the fridge to find nothing but rows of canned milk.
Maybe conjuring something to eat with magic. Augusta closed the refrigerator door sadly, then dismissed the idea. It's too troublesome, he doesn't want to waste his magic power on such a trivial matter. Liliana just came to visit yesterday and helped him cook a sumptuous dinner, and there is still half a roast chicken left. Just have that for breakfast.
He put the rotisserie chicken in the microwave to heat it up. If Cavodian sees his current behavior, he will definitely shout: "The shame of the magician! You don't use magic to heat but use a microwave oven! How could I know a friend like you? I don't know you! I will see you again in the future." Please pretend you don't know, thank you!" Ah ha, that would be great. Next time, we should invite Cavodian as a guest, and then demonstrate sixteen simple microwave cooking methods in front of him—the standard is just like the instruction manual!
Then, Augusta returned to the living room and opened the letter on the coffee table. The handwriting on the letter was indeed written by Cavodian, and the tone was as embarrassing as he himself.
Dear Augusta:
Recently, I was surprised to hear that your house was stolen. I express my indignation at this unfortunate accident, and express my deep sympathy to you who suffered such a tragic blow.
Since I have been on a business trip recently, I have been unable to visit (this word has been crossed out) and visit (this word has also been crossed out) to visit your expensive house in person, so I specially sent a small gift, and I hope to accept it.
Your loyalty
Carvodine
PS If you can handle this kid's monthly trouble, I guarantee he'll be the perfect house guard.
Augusta knew of only two creatures in the world that faced monthly trouble. One is a woman and the other is a werewolf. He thought Cavodian meant the latter, because he didn't think a woman could be called "he" or defend property. From what he'd seen and heard with certain demon girlfriends, they should be thankful they didn't lose their fortunes.
The magician calmly piled up the letter from his friend, put it flat on the palm of his hand, and summoned a flame to burn it to ashes. Cavodian is such a warmhearted person. he thought. He even gave me a werewolf as a security guard, he is really kind. Next time it's time for him to be a guest, I'm going to cook for him myself and stuff all the charcoal from the frying pan into his nasty mouth.
Then Augusta rushed to the entrance like a whirlwind, and prepared a locking spell, which could be thrown on the werewolf who was packed and sent to his home at any time. But when he reached the entrance, he was horrified to find that the box had been opened and it was empty.
bang bang! The crisp sound of plates colliding came from the kitchen. Augusta kicked the empty box to vent her anger, and rushed back to the kitchen. The scene inside made the magician suddenly have the idea of blasting his friend to the ground with a magic cannon a hundred times a hundred times.
A naked young man was sitting on a chair in a big way, holding a roasted chicken leg in one hand (from the half roasted chicken presented by Liliana yesterday), and holding a glass of milk in the other hand (the glass was given by the college when Augusta graduated. souvenir, with a stupid graduation photo printed on it), from time to time he gulped down his drink, and clicked his lips involuntarily. Seeing Augusta, the young man put down his glass and waved friendlyly: "Hello! You are the owner of this house? Roast chicken is good, do you have any more?"
If Augusta is an ordinary magician, then he will release an offensive spell, such as sleeping spell or binding spell. But he is not an ordinary magician, so he used the summoning technique to summon the "Encyclopedia of Spells and Spells" on the bookshelf. The head was smashed down hard.
The young man fell down from the chair with a sound of "嗤", and fell to the ground with his head upside down, not knowing whether he was dead or alive for a moment. The chicken leg in his hand also fell to the ground.
Waste of food deserves to be damned. Liliana knew she would cry! Augusta picked up the chicken leg, put it under the faucet and rinsed it. If the food falls on the ground and is picked up within three seconds, it can still be eaten! There is scientific evidence for this! While hypnotizing himself, the magician ignored the fact that the floor hadn't been cleaned for several days, and ate with relish.
That evening, Augusta, who had only had one meal, came to the kitchen dizzy from hunger. The young man who was tied to the chair after being knocked out by him just woke up slowly. He opened his eyes with difficulty, and at first his expression was blank, as if he didn't understand what happened. He was visibly horrified when he found himself bound (again with rune-laced ropes) and unable to move.
"What... what do you want?" he yelled at August. The magician scratched his aching ears, and warned him to shut up with his eyes.
"I should ask you this question!" August pointed a silver fork at the young man's nose, as if he were a brave hunter holding a silver wedge to face the vicious vampire, "Break into my house privately, Eating my food without my consent and almost blinding me without my clothes on, it would be easy to knock you out!"
"How can you say that!" The young man opened his innocent eyes wide, and Augusta found that he had a pair of blue eyes, because the color was too pure, it was a little unreal, "You are not Augusta Hollich Your Excellency?"
"Obviously I am."
"That's it!" The young man tried to puff up his chest confidently, but was discouraged by the magic rope, "I was sent by Lord Cavodian, and you signed for it yourself, so I didn't Break into your house; since you welcome me in person, then I am a guest, so what if I eat something from you?"
Augusta choked. Intuition told him that the young man's words had logical problems, but he couldn't find a flaw for a while. So he snorted: "Then... what about the clothes?" It depends on how you explain this question!
The young man replied: "It's not very simple. Not wearing clothes can reduce the weight of the package."
— Cavodian! I am at odds with you!
Augusta almost spat out a mouthful of blood. He clutched his chest that was throbbing with anger, staggered out of the kitchen, desperately wanted to find his forbidden book "Dark Magic and Curses" in the study, and copied a few curses that would make the subject's life worse than death , throwing them one by one at Cavodian, and—
"Where's the courier? Where did the damn courier go? I'm going to pack and send back the goddamn werewolf!"
"No!" The young man screamed, "Don't send me back! Please! Lord Cavodian will make me into a wolfskin scarf!"
Augusta said coldly: "That's illegal. As a national civil servant and the deputy director of the High Commission of Magic, Cavodian cannot possibly know the law and break the law."
"He definitely has the guts!" The young man struggled and dragged the chair on the floor with a creaking sound, "Don't drive me away! I will help you catch the thief. Hasn't your house been stolen recently?"
"Thank you for your enthusiasm, but I have strengthened the magic protection around the mansion, so I don't have to worry about thieves."
"I can also cook and do housework..."
"That's a pity. I hired a domestic worker to clean up regularly." Augusta didn't give him any face.
"... I can still warm the bed!"
There was a fishy sweetness in the magician's throat.
"Get out! Get out now!"
There was a click. There was the sound of the door opening from the entrance, followed by the thud of high heels stepping on the floor. The sound stopped after a few rings, and the owner of the high heels seemed to have put on slippers. Soft footsteps circled the living room, and then came to the kitchen door.
"Good evening, Mr. Augusta." A mature female voice sounded from outside the door, "I guess you must have not eaten dinner, so you brought..."
The door was pulled open, and a beautiful woman with a voluptuous figure appeared at the door. She had fair skin and long black curly hair draped over her shoulders. Her ruby-like eyes sized up the two people in the kitchen. He stayed there for a while with interest, then slowly moved away.
"It seems that I came at a really bad time." The beauty showed a delicate and complicated expression, "I interrupted the good things of the two, please forgive me." She pursed her lips and smiled, looked at the naked young man who was tied up, and continued to tease, " But I didn't expect Mr. Augusta's interest to be so special..." She turned around gracefully, and closed the kitchen door behind her back.
Augusta and the youth looked at each other.
"Who is she?" asked the young man.
"Quintina, the domestic worker I hired." The magician replied.
"A vampire?" the young man asked again.
"Ouch, you discovered all of this." The magician replied again.
Then he realized that his vampire domestic worker seemed to have misunderstood something, and rushed out the door.
"Quintina, you misunderstood, we are not the kind of relationship you imagined!"
"Ah, stop, Mr. Augusta, I'm not a three-year-old child, I understand." The female vampire's voice was smiling, "And I don't discriminate against homosexuals, so don't worry..."
"Who cares about that!!!"