Extra: Book Club
[Today’s brain hole, let the Primarchs read something weird]
[This chapter is free. Okay, it really doesn’t have much nutritional value. Throw away your brain. Throw away your brain. I’m just reminding you once.]
[“*” part is for intensive reading]
This is a small room, you can imagine it as any reading environment you find comfortable, and then stuff a few chairs that the Primarch can sit on and arrange them in a circle.
"So, what is this for?"
Hades reached out to grab the Macragge dessert on the table, but he couldn't reach it. Angron, who was opposite him, pushed him to reach it, while Mortarion stared at Angron silently.
He looked at Malcador in front of him. The old man was silent and looked at him as if he wanted to throw Hades out and beat him up.
This small circle was not full. Currently there were only Angron, Mortarion, Guilliman and Hades, plus the host Malcador. The good news was that Hades was very familiar with all of them, so he reached out without hesitation and attacked the most cost-effective dessert on the table.
Makado had a smile on his face but no real smile.
"Read books—to fill your empty head, Hades."
The regent's words immediately drew simultaneous rebuttals from the three Primarchs. Angron roared loudly, Guilliman shamelessly tried to persuade the old man to be rational, and Mortarion reached directly to his waist, where the pistol and the Lantern were hung.
Hades waved his hand indifferently, signaling everyone to calm down. He guessed that Malcador should not have eaten today, otherwise his attack power would not be so low.
"Then come."
Hades handed Malcador a piece of dessert. Malcador took it naturally and threw the book in his hand directly to Hades.
Even Mortarion, who was standing beside Hades, was looking at Malcador with a mixture of surprise and disgust, as if wondering when Hades had gotten involved with such a scumbag.
Hades was busy wiping his hands with a handkerchief when he took the book, and he didn't notice Mortarion's reaction. He stared at the cover of the shit-green book and read aloud thoughtfully,
"I Don't Want to Be a Stinky Can?! The Original Short Version and Selected Comments - What is this?"
It actually sounds a lot like the unclear words that Hades usually likes to shout out.
He looked up at Malcador with some curiosity. Malcador still had the same smiling face as if he had been called up to work overtime for thousands of years. He looked at Hades in a friendly manner and rolled his eyes.
"All right."
Hades was used to it, he turned to the next page,
"Oh! Guilliman, you read it."
Hades opened the page, which read [Please Robert Guilliman - the king of overtime, the king of farming, the ambitious regent, the king of Macragge, read this paragraph]
Mortarion laughed aloud, and he was sure he saw Guilliman's unchanging glib expression twitch for a moment.
Guilliman took the book slowly and carefully. He turned back into the smiling politician at the banquet, as if he was laughing along with the non-existent mortals around him.
[… A very interesting alias, which reminds me of those folk comedy plays.]
Guilliman took a deep breath.
[But I don’t know where the title “Ambitious Regent” came from. ]
He carefully and cunningly observed the other people's reactions to this sentence. Malcador, the real regent of the empire, was still rolling his eyes at Hades, Mortarion's hands were still dangling at his waist, and Angron was bored and roughly rummaging through the snack basket, passing a piece to Hades.
No one cares about him.
It seems that not everyone has Guilliman's extraordinary political sensitivity.
Guilliman breathed a sigh of relief at his discovery and opened to the first page, sincerely hoping that the others would continue to do so, as he knew that such books usually contained quite spicy language.
[Chapter 293,]
The smooth High Gothic language sounded, with perfect reading talent,
[A simple vacation.]
Guilliman continued to look down, his eyelids twitching imperceptibly.
[When the shaky ship finally appeared over Terra, Hades and Malcador both breathed a sigh of relief.]
Hades stopped chewing and turned to look at Guilliman with a confused look, while Malcador's sinister gaze pierced straight at Guilliman.
Angron looked interested, and Mortarion's expression darkened.
Guilliman put down the book in his hand, raised his hand innocently, and looked at Malcador.
Should I continue
"continue."
Malcador said through gritted teeth.
Then Guilliman began to continue,
*[The long journey through the warp took all the patience of the two men, and Malcador felt as if he was holding a—]
Guilliman said awkwardly,
[These words are too dirty. I can't pronounce them.]
"Then see if it has any hints."
Malcador said calmly, but it sounded like he was gritting his teeth.
Miraculously, when Guilliman lowered his head again, he saw a line of small words appear on it:
+You can give the following paragraphs to Hades. +
Guilliman decisively threw this hot potato to Hades, who looked at it with interest, and then he laughed.
“Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha, Malcador, you have come to this day too!”
Hades read it aloud without hesitation,
* "The long journey through the warp exhausted all the patience of the two men. Malcador felt like he was swimming with a mouthful of shit in his mouth. He could neither spit it out nor swallow it."
“Ahahahahahahaha!!!”
Hades let out a huge, mocking laugh, and Malcador silently and magically took out a huge golden scepter from under his black robe. The old man stood up and walked towards Hades.
Mortarion stood up with an expressionless face. He stood before Hades, and the Lord of Death lowered his scythe.
By the way, Mortarion also hit Hades' feet with his sickle, signaling him to shut up and at least be more human.
Angron smiled and pulled Malcador over. The Lord of Red Sand asked curiously,
[What on earth is this doing, Malcador, that you feel—this feeling?]
Makado's mouth twitched.
"Keep reading."
He said,
It was so fun that Hades continued reading decisively.
"Hades was no better. He felt as if Malcador was psychically forcing him into a vat of vomit, which was shouting abuse at him for being unburnable garbage."
Hades' voice gradually faded away.
"Uh... well, this is it."
Just as Mortarion was about to ask Hades if he felt this every time he jumped into the warp, Hades behind him began to scream.
"There is no happy ending between psychics and soulless beings, Malcador. You and I are destined not to be together! Even though shit and vomit may be a perfect match, they are ultimately worlds apart!"
Mortarion pondered for a moment, then silently took a step to the side and watched Malcador walk past him with his cane in hand.
The rest of the reading was done by Guilliman, accompanied by the sound of great psychic cane swinging, psychic muscle strong spells, and shrill cries of "Malcador, you have no respect for the elderly and the young, and no martial ethics."
Mortarion took the Macragge-emblazoned snack from Angron with an expressionless face, and he should have realized this long ago.
Finally, Malcador stood there panting with his crutch, while Hades continued to scream loudly and intact, nimbly rushing into the attack range of Malcador's crutch, and then immediately retreating after screaming.
Mortarion should have realized that this was the guy's way of entertaining himself, and the three Primarchs quickly adapted to this ridiculous situation.
The background sound of Guilliman's reading stuttered, and he stopped at the part where Malcador asked Hades to comment on Terra.
Boring, Mortarion thought, Guilliman had just finished reading about what a piece of crap Terra was, a giant religious garbage dump, what else could Hades say
He heard Hades screaming shrilly behind him.
“Don’t read! Don’t! Guilliman—”
Bang! Malcador hit Hades with a club, and the old man shouted angrily,
"Read! You dare not take responsibility for what you say!"
Guilliman trembled, unbelievably, and whispered the sentence:
[I feel... Terra is not as good as Macragge? ]
Hades looked at the two huge figures walking towards him with a wry smile on his face.
"Well, we can discuss this matter. A gentleman does not resort to violence. He does not resort to violence."
Mortarion's eyes did not blink, he lowered his scythe
[Why Macragge?]
Guilliman also stared at Hades with a smile on his face.
[Why Macragge—I think you know the political significance of Terra, Hades, are you... doing this on purpose?]
Now Guilliman knew why Malcador had been targeting him all that time.
(End of this chapter)