After Yan Shaozhen was transferred back to Beijing, Yu Fengcheng moved into Chen Jing's dormitory.
After more than half a year, there were finally shadows and voices other than him walking around in his dormitory again, but he knew it wasn't Bai Xinyu.
He and Chen Jing came out of the same class, and the relationship between the two has always been very close, but at the beginning, Yu Fengcheng seldom spoke, especially whenever Chen Jing mentioned Bai Xinyu, Yu Fengcheng would immediately remain silent.
But gradually, Yu Fengcheng began to take the initiative to mention Bai Xinyu, even if it was just to chat with Chen Jing about their time in the recruit company and the third squad. Chen Jing is the only person in the entire Snow Leopard team who can talk to him about Bai Xinyu. He needs someone to help him recall the details and bits and pieces about Bai Xinyu. The name was heard in other people's ears. He needs Chen Jing to remind him from time to time that Bai Xinyu has not disappeared from his world, they are just not in the same place.
One day, Yu Fengcheng saw Chen Jing sewing a vest. He glanced at it and found that Chen Jing was sewing his name on the vest. He remembered that many old snow leopards had this tradition of sewing their closest relatives on the left chest of their underwear. A person's name can not only convey thoughts, but also a kind of blessing.
Thinking of the several missions carried out in the Snow Leopard Brigade, each time was full of dangers and could die at any time. This crooked name is the softest part of the hearts of these Predators, motivating them to live.
Chen Jing looked at him, "I sew my parents'."
Yu Fengcheng nodded, "Lend me your needle and thread."
Chen Jing threw the sewing kit to him.
He turned his vest inside out, stroking the left chest with his slender fingers. He remembered that the first time he saw a veteran doing this, he still felt a bit bitch, but now he understands that when he desperately misses someone but can't hug him, he really needs something to divert his thoughts, otherwise the longing Too heavy and it might overwhelm you.
Chen Jing said, "Whose name are you going to sew?"
Yu Fengcheng didn't answer, he sewed a simple word "白" first, the word was crooked, it looked like it had been dismembered, looking at the word, Yu Fengcheng felt a sore nose. He took a deep breath, leaned back in the chair, stared at the ceiling with wide eyes.
Chen Jing came over and took a look at the character "白", "You sewed the five-stroke character so distortedly, the character 'Xin' must hit your stomach."
Yu Fengcheng shifted his gaze to him, "Squad leader, I want to go back and find him right now."
"It's unlikely to be possible soon. You will have family leave for two years of normal enlistment. Go back during the Chinese New Year."
Yu Fengcheng smiled wryly, "There are still two months..."
Chen Jing patted him on the shoulder, "Xin Yu sent a lot of money to Brother Zhao and the golden carving family."
"I know."
Chen Jing sighed: "I have been a soldier for so many years, and he is the most unexpected soldier. From the day he joined the army to now, he seems to have been rebuilt, but when you think about it carefully, it is because he is kind and has potential. He is what he is today, the army inspired him, and he gave back to the army. In short, he is really a wonderful person. I think no one who has come into contact with him will forget him."
Yu Fengcheng nodded, and said softly: "Tell me more." Tell me more about Bai Xinyu, it's best to let Bai Xinyu fill his whole thinking and life, and make him feel that Bai Xinyu is around him.
During the Chinese New Year, he applied for family-visiting leave and couldn't wait to go home. He didn't go home. After arriving in Beijing, he took a short rest and went straight to the company where Bai Xinyu worked.
Although he couldn't see Bai Xinyu for more than half a year, he knew a lot about Bai Xinyu's recent situation. He found Bai Xinyu's car in the parking lot, and waited silently not far away.
Near the end of get off work time, Bai Xinyu appeared in the parking lot.
The moment Yu Fengcheng saw him, his heart suddenly tightened.
I haven't seen him for more than half a year. Bai Xinyu's skin is much paler, and his hair is a little longer than before, but his brisk walking posture and the heroic spirit between his brows have completely integrated into his temperament, which has not changed at all from when he was in the army. , still so dazzling.
Yu Fengcheng clenched his fists. There was only such a short distance between him and the person he missed day and night, but he didn't have the courage to rush up. He bit his teeth and silently followed behind Bai Xinyu.
He could tell from Bai Xinyu's slightly stiff shoulders that Bai Xinyu had found someone following him. He knew that his actions were not careful, and he even felt his violent heartbeat echoing throughout the parking lot.
When turning around a pillar, Bai Xinyu turned around abruptly and raised his foot to kick it.
Yu Fengcheng was already prepared, and turned his head. His eyes fixed on Bai Xinyu, staring at Bai Xinyu with the kind of concentration that seemed to want to swallow people into his stomach.
Bai Xinyu's face was very calm, but his eyes flashed with surprise, puzzlement, and finally indifference.
Yu Fengcheng felt heartbroken. On the surface, he pretended to be indifferent. Only he knew that his heart would explode in the next second, and every cell in his body was longing for the man in front of him. He wanted to hug Bai Xinyu tightly, tightly... never again Do not let go.
Under his pestering, Bai Xinyu reluctantly agreed to have dinner with him. His mind was in a mess at the time, but he always reminded himself that he had to behave like that Yu Fengcheng that Bai Xinyu once liked.
They talked a lot during that meal, but no matter how he confessed his feelings, Bai Xinyu didn't believe it. In fact, he had expected such a result long ago. How could he be easily forgiven for what he did on Kunlun Mountain.
The meal broke up badly, and after Bai Xinyu left, Yu Fengcheng's forced appearance could no longer hold up. He looked at Bai Xinyu's car leaving in a hurry, and felt that the whole space was distorted in front of him.
Because of Bai Xinyu's appearance, he was able to clarify his blurred thoughts about Huo Qiao. Bai Xinyu let him know what it is to really like someone, sweetness, jealousy, worry, sadness, responsibility, pain, longing, despair, etc. It was Bai Xinyu who made him realize that in this life, it is impossible for anyone to pierce his heart with a word or a look.
But he understood it too late. If he could see through himself earlier, would everything be different? Now, Bai Xinyu has completely isolated him from a distance, he doesn't know how many walls he needs to hit to close the distance between the two of them again.
But even if there is a mountain in front of him, he will definitely climb over it.
His vacation was short, and soon he returned to the Snow Leopard Team. Training, study, missions, life is going on invariably, he is counting the days, he has to go back to Beijing to go to school, he wants to go as close as possible to Bai Xinyu.
On the eve of leaving Snow Leopard, he was injured during a mission, inhaled toxic gas in his lungs, and lay in the hospital for nearly a month.
In the pain of repeated lung washing and physical therapy, he thought more than once about the half month when Bai Xinyu was lying on the hospital bed with a shoulder injury.
When he brought Bai Xinyu into the Snow Leopard Team, he had been struggling. On the one hand, it was his own selfishness and Bai Xinyu's longing, and on the other hand, he was worried about Bai Xinyu. When Bai Xinyu passed the final psychological stripping training and became a real When he was a member of the Snow Leopard, he swore to himself that as long as he could move, he would never let Bai Xinyu get hurt. But in the end it was Bai Xinyu who protected him, but he...
Guilt and pain made him more desperate than physical trauma. He took the mobile phone and played Bai Xinyu's call repeatedly, hoping to hear that familiar voice, but what he heard was either rejection or a blind voice, a long and lingering voice. , Heartbreaking blind tone.
When he was lying alone on the hospital bed, he knew that he wanted Bai Xinyu to appear in front of him more than recovery or anything in the world, even if it was just to say "I wish you a speedy recovery". As time went by, his longing for that person was accompanied by his own guilt. He knew that he could no longer go to the battlefield. Every day is torture for him, he would rather be tortured in a place closer to Bai Xinyu than this.
Not long after he was discharged from the hospital, he learned from a private detective that Bai Xinyu had come to Urumqi, and it seemed that he was here with his cousin to investigate the project. When Chen Jing asked for leave that day, he knew he must be going to see Bai Xinyu, so he quietly followed.
He actually wanted to look from a distance that day, he could imagine what Bai Xinyu would say when he appeared suddenly, just thinking about it made his heart tremble. But Bai Xinyu had a fever and was wandering on the road, which was quite dangerous, so he insisted on sending him back to the hotel.
He stood guard in front of Bai Xinyu's bed for a long time, and that was probably the happiest and most satisfying moment since they broke up in Kunlun Mountains. He sat motionless and carefully looked at Bai Xinyu's sleeping face, over and over again, So detailed that you can outline the shape of the eyelashes in your mind. He kissed those soft lips, those familiar lips exuding heat, which made his blood boil. How much he wished that they could go back to the past, the past when Bai Xinyu would smile at him and act coquettishly to him when he opened his eyes.
In the end, he was kicked out by Bai Xinyu's cousin, the man who made him extremely jealous, and in his mind, even worried him more than Yan Shaozhen.
After leaving the hotel, he went to the bar and got drunk despite his wound not healing.
He used to be young and frivolous, and thought he was fearless, but now he understands that only those who don't have any love in their hearts can be truly fearless, otherwise everyone may be weak and vulnerable.
The author has something to say: Good night everyone~