When I was a senior, I caught the last train and got a minimum-level scholarship as a substitute. The school gave me 300 yuan. This was something I had never expected. I was so excited that I couldn't sleep in the middle of the night when I received the money.
Bai Lin leaned on the railing of the upper bunk, rolled his eyes and said, "It's not that serious, three hundred yuan. People who don't know better would think you're crazy."
"What chicken blood?" I wondered.
"It is said," Bai Lin sat up from his bed and explained, "after people inject chicken blood with a syringe, they will feel hot all over, their face will be ruddy, and they won't want to sleep for months."
So now I am standing in the middle of the guest room. It is almost dawn and I feel like running out of energy. I want to run to the balcony and scream loudly, but I am afraid of being heard by Mu Chenghe next door and being caught by the hotel security.
Then I jumped onto the bed, buried my head under the pillow, and rubbed the sheets and pillow hard.
In the end, I ignored my schedule and called Bai Lin. Otherwise, I’m not sure if I can make it until tomorrow morning without going crazy if I don’t find someone to vent to.
Bai Lin, who was woken up in the middle of the night, was much calmer than me. After listening to my story, he couldn't help but say meaningfully: "Xiaotong..."
"What?"
"Did you give Mu Chenghe some medicine?"
“… No.” When I heard this question, I wanted to beat her up.
"Did you get him drinking?"
"No."
"He was unconscious and had a brain cramp?"
"Impossible. He was talking to me the first minute."
"what's next?"
"What's next?"
"After he kissed you, what happened?"
"We'll go back to the hotel."
"Did I hold your hand along the way?"
"No."
"Did you say anything?"
"It seems that he only said two sentences."
"What what?" Bai Lin asked excitedly.
"One was: It's too late, let's go back." I recalled it carefully with shyness, "The other was: It's so spicy."
"so spicy?"
"Yeah, my mouth was full of the smell of barbecued chili peppers, and it must have been spicy for him."
"… "
"Tell me," I finally couldn't help asking after a while, "Does he like me?"
"I feel sorry for Mu Chenghe." Bai Lin did not answer, but sighed quietly.
"Why?" It's obvious that I am the more pitiful one.
"It would be fine if he really had a brain cramp, but it would be unfortunate if he really fell in love with you."
"Why is falling in love with me unfortunate?"
"Because you're slow. You don't think someone likes you until they forcefully kiss you."
"Then you didn't think Mu Chenghe liked me before?" I was not convinced.
"We have only heard your one-sided story before, and we have never seen how he actually treated you. Of course, you dominated us."
We were silent on the phone for a while.
"When do you think he started?" Bai Lin asked.
Bai Lin's words made me start searching my memories for clues about Mu Chenghe.
First of all, let’s discuss at which moment I started
I escaped death from him when I cheated in the final exam.
When he came to substitute teach me, he held my chin in the office and taught me pronunciation.
Bai Lin and I climbed over the wall and left home, and did not return home that night. He received a call from me late at night and drove to the police station to pick us up.
After coming back from the air show with Peng Yu, he put the scarf around my neck.
On New Year's Eve, he hugged me and said: Happy New Year.
On the long-distance bus, when he suddenly had an attack, he said: Xue Tong, no need, and then held my hand tightly.
When he saw Chen Yan's body, he was at a loss as to how to comfort me and wipe my tears.
Every little bit of Mu Chenghe's kindness is like the spring rain that moistens everything, falling into my heart. When I think about it carefully, I don't even know when I started to be obsessed with him.
Originally I was determined to give up thinking about him, but later I realized how futile it was.
What about Mu Chenghe? When did he develop strange feelings for me
I always feel that for every inch I take forward, he takes a foot back.
Later, when I became discouraged and no longer bothered him, and retreated into my own body, he gradually became close to me.
"But we were also infected by your slowness." Bai Lin said. "Now that I think about it, it really makes sense."
"If you put it that way, why didn't he just tell me directly?"
"Why don't you just tell him that you like him?"
"That's because I don't know what he's thinking."
"So they say: Birds of a feather flock together." Bai Lin said earnestly.
"What should I do next?" I was very worried about this question.
"Don't worry about this."
"Why?"
"He was the one who forced the kiss on you, not you. What is there to worry about? The one who should be worried and unable to sleep tonight should be Mu Chenghe."
“Yes.”
But the truth is not that simple.
On the way back the next day, I was listless because of my puffy eyes. As for Mu Chenghe, I couldn't tell how uneasy he was inside, but at least his face was cool and calm, which was in sharp contrast with the scorching sun in the sky.
The weather was still cool in the morning, so he didn't turn on the air conditioner, letting the sea breeze blow in through the car window. I stole a glance at him. The sun shone into a corner, falling on his hand holding the steering wheel, shining on the light blue veins on the back of his hand.
The wind, which carried a salty smell and scent, messed up his hair a little.
He seemed to be in a good mood and looked completely upright.
Now, my heart was beating fast, and I couldn't help but wonder if I was just dreaming last night.
When I thought about this, I felt that I should calm down, put away my excitement and agitation, and organize my thoughts. So I picked up the bottle of mineral water he bought before getting on the car and gulped down several gulps.
"I noticed that you don't like to drink water," he said.
"Hmm." I rubbed my mouth with the back of my hand and screwed on the bottle cap. "A little bit. My mom said so too." I just have this problem. I don't like to drink too much water. I feel thirsty as soon as I eat, and then I drink a lot of soup or rice soaked in soup.
I thought he would give me a lecture, but he just smiled and glanced at me.
After a moment, Mu Chenghe slowly said, "I like to drink water."
"Huh?" I was stunned for a moment, not knowing how to continue the conversation, so I just said, "Drinking water is good. Eight glasses of water a day will keep your skin hydrated and tender."
He looked ahead and didn't respond to me.
So, I felt that what I said was not enough, so I kept chattering in front of Mu Chenghe about all the benefits of drinking water to the human body that my mother had listed in detail in front of me when I was a child.
Finally, perhaps because he saw that I was talking to myself for a long time and it was very tiring, and he, as the audience, had no reaction at all, which was very unkind, he finally cooperated with me and agreed with me: "I see."
After my mouth quieted down, I couldn't help but look at him again.
Could it be that I was possessed by a demon yesterday
Could it be that he has intermittent amnesia
Could it be that I really drugged him
When I arrived at the gas station, I went to the bathroom and came back to find that the gas had been filled up and Mu Chenghe was waiting for me in the car.
He asked, "Do you have anything to do at noon? If so, we can take the highway back."
"Don't be in a hurry, drive slowly." I know he seldom drives on the highway.
He reached out to take the bottle of mineral water placed horizontally in front of him.
The guy at the gas station said something to him at the other end of the car, and he nodded while unscrewing the bottle cap.
I vaguely felt that there was something I needed to remind him of, but I couldn't figure out what it was.
Then, he put the bottle mouth to his lips and took a sip. The water in the transparent plastic bottle rippled back and forth a few times and then went down a little. His Adam's apple moved.
Then he took another bite.
Noticing that I was staring at him motionlessly, Mu Chenghe looked back at me suspiciously, as if trying to figure out my expression. In a split second, he seemed to realize something, and after lowering his head and glancing at the plastic bottle in his hand, his expression changed slightly, and he pretended to be calm and put it back in place.
When we were in school, we were used to each other. As long as we were good roommates, using each other's cups was not a big deal.
I don't really like this behavior. I always feel that no matter how close two people are, it's not comfortable to be stained with other people's saliva. At home with my parents, I don't make such a clear distinction, but I still try to use my own things.
Later, after living with Mu Chenghe for a while, I found that he was a person of the same character as me.
Not to mention tea cups and mouthwash cups, even bowls look different.
So when he realized that what he swallowed was actually what I drank, he was probably disgusted and immediately put the bottle back in place at lightning speed, then started the car and drove out of the gas station.
I admit that I just put it there casually, so I am responsible, but how could I know that he was so careless, and it can't be blamed entirely on me. Besides, he kissed me on the mouth for nothing, so why is he so afraid of my saliva
I muttered a few words in my mind.
The bottle was against the front glass, swaying back and forth as the car bumped along, as if trying to remind both of us that it really existed.
I moved forward, took it back, and placed it by the side door.
I don’t know what he was thinking, but when he saw me do this, he handed me the unopened bottle of water.
Holding the bottle of water, I wondered why he gave me a new one. Was he asking me to throw away the old one and destroy the evidence? No way. Was he such a germaphobe
As I thought about it, I couldn't help but look at him again.
A quick glance revealed only the lower half of his face. His lips were still wet from the water he had just washed, and the part near the inside had a moist sheen.
I pursed my lips subconsciously.
Last night, it was these lips that took my heart away. Thinking back to it now, the soft touch still seems to remain. I couldn't help but raise my hand and rub my mouth with the back of my fingers.
Mu Chenghe didn't look at me, but I felt that his face was faintly stained with a layer of pink. I was a little puzzled, could it be that the sunburn from yesterday hadn't faded yet
The car turned a corner. He turned on the radio. The music channel was playing the latest popular songs.
"You should learn how to drive while you are free now. If I go on a business trip in the future..." He paused, hesitated for two or three seconds, and continued, "It will be convenient for you in the future."
I said, "It will probably take me ten or eight years to earn enough money to buy a car, so there is no point in learning it."
His eyes moved slightly and he said nothing more.
I don't know why, but even though he looked normal, I could vaguely sense that his mood had suddenly dropped. Then, he closed all the windows to block out the outside wind and smell, turned on the air conditioner, and changed the radio channel.
I blinked my eyes, wondering if I had said something wrong just now.
Mu Chenghe was originally a very easy-going person with an unusually good temper. Sometimes he was cunning and sly, and sometimes he was quiet and docile.
He didn't have classes or business trips during the holidays, so he would go back and forth between the institute and his home. I felt embarrassed to eat and drink at his house, so I tried to buy groceries for him to take home.
He occasionally goes to the supermarket to buy some ingredients himself.
At first he made me the red wine chicken wings, and I thought he was a gourmet.
But it turned out to be a misunderstanding.
For example, when he cooks, the meat dish is stir-fried shredded cabbage with shredded pork, and the vegetarian dish is stir-fried cabbage with cabbage soup. If he wants to change the taste, he can make stir-fried cabbage with pork slices, sweet and sour cabbage, and pickled cabbage if he doesn't want to drink the soup. Of course, if he wants to change it up a bit, with his IQ, he can completely replace all the cabbage with lettuce or cucumber and cook it again.
After eating like this for several meals in a row during the first few days after I moved in, I suddenly realized that I still had some talents in my daily life. I couldn't help feeling gratified, and began to volunteer to be the cook.
I cook and he washes the dishes.
I mopped the floor and he wiped the furniture.
Wash your own clothes and put your bed sheets and quilt covers in the washing machine.
We were so harmonious and friendly, but unexpectedly, after returning from the beach, something strange happened. I don't know if it was after he kissed me or after his emotional fluctuations in the car. In short, in the remaining days, this man rarely appeared in my sight. He started to get up early and go to bed late, and prepared one reason after another for me not to come back for dinner, all of which were reasonable.
"I have an illusion." Bai Lin said on the phone.
"What illusion?"
"It seems like you two are married, and now he is having an affair outside, and you have become a lonely woman."
"Pooh!"
"Once you find some smell of powder, perfume, lipstick marks or hotel receipts, then it will be irrefutable evidence."
"Xiao Bai... stop making sarcastic remarks."
"Come to think of it," Bai Lin changed the subject, "Are you a substitute, so he kissed you?"
"What kind of stand-in can I be?" I just asked, and I understood. "You mean the kind in TV shows or novels, where the heroine looks a lot like the hero's ex-lover, so he mistook me for someone else and kissed me?"
"Yes, yes." Bai Lin said excitedly, "Xiaotong, you are indeed my soulmate. You understand what I mean so well."
I didn't continue to talk to her. After a moment of silence, I slowly said, "Xiao Bai, I don't want to live here anymore."
Bai Lin also became serious now. After thinking for a while, he said, "I think that's fine."
I hadn't thought of this step at first and just asked for her opinion casually, but after getting her approval, I really began to think about leaving.
What's the saying: If I am not welcome here, I will find another place that will welcome me.
To put it more elegantly: The mountains and rivers remain unchanged, and the green waters flow forever. Mu Chenghe, we will see each other later.
He got home at around ten o'clock in the evening and I was watching TV.
"I have something to tell you." I turned down the volume of the show.
"What?" he responded casually.
"I found a job."
"Where?"
“A secondary college of the Normal University.”
"teacher?"
"Well, it's not a formal position. They just happen to be short of counselors. I want to give it a try."
"Will there be class?"
“I will teach public English to freshmen and sophomores.”
"That's good. Don't lose the major you studied for four years."
I felt a little bitter in my heart. This dialogue seemed to bring us back to the starting point, he is the teacher and I am the student.
So, I said: "Teacher Mu..."
Hearing this name, his eyes like lake water flashed.
I haven't called him that for a long time, and I avoided it on purpose, but I didn't know what to change. Of course, I didn't dare to call him "Mu Chenghe" in front of him, so I had to call him "you" all the time. I felt awkward at first, but later I got used to it.
At this moment, his eyes gently touched a chord in my heart, making the words I had just agreed with Bai Lin become difficult.
He looked at me, waiting for my next words.
"Their campus is quite far from here. The teacher from the Personnel Department said that they could move a bed for me in the single dormitory building in the next few days. I can't trouble you for a long time, so..."
His eyes were fixed on me, mixed with something that was hard to grasp. I didn't dare to look at him directly anymore, so I turned my gaze to the ground and squeezed out the most difficult words.
I said, "So, I want to move out in the next few days."
I don’t know what he is thinking at the moment, and I can’t see his expression. His silence even made me start to reflect on whether I spoke too softly and he didn’t hear me.
The TV was still working. After the news, the weather forecast started. The host said: "Affected by the fluctuations of the plateau and the warm and humid air currents of the typhoon, our city will have many thunderstorms or showers starting from tomorrow night, and the rainfall will be unevenly distributed. In some places, the rainfall will be heavy, with heavy rain to torrential rain."
Because of his silence, the weak sound of the TV seemed very abrupt in the room.
Suddenly, he moved, changed his body position, and then asked, "Are you not used to living here?"
"It's okay, I just think it's troublesome for you."
"No trouble."
I had prepared a lot of excuses, but I didn't expect that he would shut me up with just three straightforward words. He had never talked to me like this before, and even acted like a child throwing a tantrum. So, I was speechless and couldn't say anything.
Just as the room was about to become quiet again, he suddenly stood up and said, "I'll take you there tomorrow or the day after tomorrow when I finish the things I'm doing. It's not easy for you to move things by yourself." After that, he went straight back to his room, leaving me sitting alone in the living room.