At this time, I didn't want everyone to notice that I was strange, and wanted to explain to the leader that I was fine... However, in the next moment, I couldn't sense the outside world.
Just because what I always thought was Chen Chengyi's sleeping will suddenly rebounded violently at this time, slowly suppressing my will, and his will could not gain the upper hand for a while.
Therefore, neither of us could clearly perceive the outside world, but we faced each other in the world of Cunsi... And gradually I also lost control of this body and soul, and who am I? I am Chen Chengyi...
I thought I would just fall asleep like this... In the silence and darkness, if you don't maintain a steady trace of clarity, it's actually not that scary, just like if you have no feeling, you will still feel scratches on you. Are the knives scary? It doesn't hurt at all, so there's nothing to be afraid of.
However, I can't forget Master's words... He told me not to give up. He told me to regard all this as just climbing a mountain... Therefore, when Tao Tongzi's will is overwhelming, he is about to kill me every time. When I was 'devouring' and assimilating, I always refused to give up my glimmer of clarity in the darkness.
I am Chengyi, I am Chen Chengyi!
This is my last glimmer of clarity... This clarity makes me very painful, because the dark and silent world surrounds me, and because Tao Tongzi's will is passively and completely suppressed, I can't perceive any situation in the outside world at all. .. .For people, the most terrifying thing is not any torture, but letting you stay in silence like this in the dark loneliness.
Therefore, maintaining this clarity is the most painful experience in my life, and it is also the most painful temper... The only thing I dare not give up is hope.
I can feel that everything about me is silently merging with Tao Tongzi, except for my will... Because I know clearly that in the end, this is what will be truly suppressed and dissipated... And the essence of will is Something that cannot be explained in any way, no one can specifically say what it is
Just like the soul can sometimes be explained as an energy or a magnetic field, but what about will
I once asked Master this question about the core of the soul. Master pondered for a long time before answering me: "This may be a heart, this may be a person's thoughts. This is the most intangible thing."
Regardless of whether it is a heart or a fluctuating mind, the greatest nutrient is hope. I am glad that I have never given up.
From the boundless darkness at the beginning, to later, as Tao Tongzi and my soul merged more and more... His will was no longer so strong. Occasionally when his mood fluctuated, I I can also slowly perceive some of the outside world, and slowly regain some clarity.
As for why Tao Tongzi, who has always been indifferent, has such mood swings... It's hard for me to explain. I just remember that Master once mentioned the words of a senior monk as an explanation for the soul.
He said that the eminent monk once said that in fact, escaping from the river of destiny... getting rid of the painful reincarnation is not something that ordinary people cannot try, but without a perfect will (which can also be interpreted as a perfect heart) that has been tempered for many times, It is impossible to bear the memories of life after life.
Because if you don’t look at yourself with a detached heart, you will eventually be assimilated and fall into complete chaos.
The meaning of this passage seems hazy and profound, but in fact it is not difficult to understand. Every temper given by heaven is kind and fair... that is to say, at the beginning of human beings, they all have an original intention that is not stained by dust. , allowing people to start over... In the process of tempering, if it is not thorough, the mistakes made in the previous life will still be wrong, or even deeper... and some of them will temper out the impurities.
In a certain life, that is, the heart of perfection that is close to the rules of the great road. Only such a mind can see the memories of each life as the way of heaven sees the world, and the memories of each life hidden behind the barrier of destiny. Only then will the will be accepted, or in other words, will the error be completely abandoned and return to the correct will.
This is the last mental calamity before attaining enlightenment... After that, we completely return to perfection.
Ordinary people can naturally make such an attempt, but without such a heart, how can they not be affected by the memories of each life? Finally, let alone refining the will, the whole person will be completely confused in the memory of reincarnation.
Therefore, the final test is to merge the big reincarnations into rapid small reincarnations. If the state of mind is perfect, what about reincarnations for hundreds of lives
If we must explain the boy's mood swings, we can only say that his will cannot even bear my memory in this life... In the process of suppressing and assimilating my will, he was first disturbed by my memories. Confused.
I feel more and more that his indifference is just a disguise. His way of cognition should be to look at everything in the world indifferently, fairly and without emotion.
He tried his best to imitate it, but he didn't know...it was just the shape without the heart, so how could it be real? And the more this happens, the weaker he becomes. Daotongzi is severely affected by memory... And at a certain moment, his paranoia becomes more and more prominent...
In Yang Sheng's case, the doubts in his heart completely reflected this paranoia... The paranoia about the avenue is not like Yang Sheng's paranoia about science.
I heard what the elder said. Heaven had already given the answer to prevent all of this. The price of longevity was Heaven's warning... It's like having a mismatched mind without a matching mind. , in the end, all it brings to people is self-destruction.
This has nothing to do with the morals and bottom line of the righteous cultivators. It's just that the righteous cultivators saw this danger... And human beings have been endlessly trapped in internal conflicts. Isn't this the essence
When the soul is not perfect and the power expands, it always wants more... This kind of selfish greed is the original sin, which has set off war after war. To put it another way, even if Yang Sheng succeeds in everything without any sequelae, Does it have to be good for humans? What are the consequences for the world
No matter what the circumstances, it is not a good thing to obtain a powerful power that is not suitable for oneself, but a danger... What's more, Yang Sheng cannot succeed without sequelae, but is full of endless troubles. These experimental products are Example... They have become less human. Is it really not painful to live like this
I sighed, it was hard to imagine the consequences of a child taking a knife... Life is a long evolution, how can we really reverse it? Although this seems unconvincing, in fact, it is really scary...
When we were facing each other and had no perception of the outside world, Tao Tongzi and I really met for the first time, meeting in the world we perceive...
He stood in front of me, just as he remembered, wearing a green robe... His expression was indifferent, his mouth was pursed tightly, but his eyes were looking at me with some curiosity.
"Chen Chengyi, ever since I regained clarity in you, I have been surrounded by all kinds of doubts. Even things that I thought were inevitable made me wonder, like why your will that was supposed to disappear was so clear. ?You tell me, I was wrong..." The first person to speak was Dao Tongzi, he said to me.
"I can't answer you, but now I feel that all this is just like Master said, what is wrong is wrong, what is right is right, what is wrong cannot cover up what is right, this is the way of heaven, this may be that I will not disappear The reason." I said to Dao Tongzi.
Before, in my mind, Tao Tongzi was tough and invincible. Later, I discovered that the deeper I understood, the more this was not the case.
It seems that human fear comes from the unknown, and this sentence is really true.
"When you said I was wrong, were you referring to Yang Sheng's matter? What was wrong was just that Yang Sheng violated the law of heaven, so heaven took away the longevity of the person who was experimented as a warning. When I agreed with Yang Sheng, Are you violating the law of heaven?" Dao Tongzi looked at me and asked sincerely.
"No, your mistake is that you didn't see clearly why Heaven gave such a warning. You have been wrong all along by only looking at the surface of the rules, as if the rules tell you that you are one, and you just do it mechanically. You never delve into the oneness. What's behind it? Just like you think that the rules of heaven are fair and ruthless, but you don't know that behind the rules of every day is great love... I want to thank you for letting me fall into the darkness, which makes me deeper I thought about where I failed in my previous life, so I have to undergo such training in this life." I sighed and said.
At this moment, I really had a feeling of enlightenment, as if everything had been completely revealed before my eyes.
"What do you see clearly? Why is the way of heaven so great in love?" Tao Tongzi was still puzzled.
"You see clearly, I experienced Wei Chaoyu's calamity in my previous life, which may not be a bad thing. If I hadn't suffered this calamity, I would have entered the evil path. The Master launched the Dream Return Formation... just to make you realize that you have gone astray. , but in the end, you did not see this danger clearly. As for why the way of heaven is great love, you only need to look at the direction of the mainstream of the rules of heaven, and you will understand...it is righteousness, which is the greatest kindness , just like the sun rises and sets, reincarnation does not hesitate, this is kindness to life... Do you understand? If you don't experience all kinds of disturbing worldly feelings, how can you see through this in the end? What you see are just rules It's just fair and ruthless." I said with a slight sigh.
I finally understand.