Yes, I really couldn’t laugh out loud. My first reaction was, is this the real-life version of Journey to the West
At that time, Journey to the West was in full swing. I was still living in a courtyard in Beijing. Many children in the courtyard were crazy about watching Journey to the West, but there were also a few little ones who cried to death and refused to watch it. Why? ? Because the image of monsters on TV is scary.
I heard it funny at the time and thought those children were too timid. But in fact, if a person is really faced with an existence with a human body and an animal head, many people will be scared to tears.
It's just that Brother Chengxin and I can't laugh or cry. Why
The situation at this time couldn't be more obvious. The person standing in front of us is a female weasel, no, a female weasel. As soon as the fig leaf fell, we immediately saw the huge weasel head.
But why is Henggu so easy to practice? This weasel obviously didn't transform successfully. In the final analysis, it can only stand up like a human being. The proportions of its limbs are more like that of a human being, and its body is still furry.
There are many legends about Wong Tai Sin in the Northeast. The true and false cannot be broken down, but one thing is always true, that is, the weasel is an animal that loves to imitate people. For example, it worships the moon, and blocks people. Bowing on the road and so on.
The reason for this is that weasels, like foxes, are very spiritual. Another reason is that aside from domestic animals, weasels are definitely the animals closest to humans. They are the ones who steal chickens and dogs. But in the long run, everything human beings have had a huge impact on weasels.
It was just standing there in front of us, and what was terrible was that it looked shy and subconsciously covered its breasts, as if Brother Chengxin and I had taken advantage of it, and Ruxue's underwear was so crooked. It hangs crookedly on it, and what's even more inexplicable is that there are many small bags hanging on it.
One of the small bags was torn, and what was exposed inside was dried flowers.
Facing such a weasel, what expression can we have other than laughing and crying? I asked why I didn’t smell this guy’s scent at the first time, not even Lao Zhang. It turned out that this guy also wore artificial perfume—dried flowers—on his body!
What it didn’t know was that the mixture of the fragrant and stinky smells formed an even worse smell. Looking at its appearance at this time, I was so angry that I yelled: “You bastard, what are you wearing?” Underwear? Is it like that? Cover your sex, and I haven’t asked you for money yet so I can wash my eyes.”
Wu Laogui said coldly next to him: "I guess Chengyi was aroused by Ruxue's underwear."
I didn't even have the energy to scold Old Ghost Wu, because my words seemed to have completely angered the weasel. It screamed strangely and rushed towards me.
If you want to talk about monsters fighting, if you think about magic fighting, you are reading a novel. Monsters who know magic can modify their Tao. If they know magic, how can they still be called monsters? They are real monsters, and they have already transformed successfully. .
I have never met a monster, but it is recorded in the classics that monsters are nothing more than two things.
First, he is strong and agile. This is his innate advantage, and we cannot envy him.
Second, it is to confuse people's minds, and more advanced people will use it as a blindfold.
Therefore, in addition to their scary appearance, if you see through them, you won't feel too scary. In some unofficial historical records, there are often stories of ancient people encountering monsters. Those who are bolder will go up to them with a big knife. , you can still win, that’s the reason.
The weasel's body hit my ribs. It was so strong that I almost vomited out the acid water in my stomach. In fact, it wanted to bite me, but I cleverly avoided it, otherwise it would have been a big blow. Big chunks of meat.
"Brother Chengxin, the golden needle is pricking the acupuncture point!" I shouted, and took the opportunity to punch the weasel.
Brother Chengxin looked at me and the weasel fighting each other and couldn't get in, so he shouted: "It moves too fast, I can't get in."
I'm about to cry. It's obvious that I'm fighting the monster head-on. I'm not like a Taoist priest who prefers to hide behind people and throw talismans. I wish I had Hui Gen'er here. I'll definitely beat this weasel continuously. I don’t even know my own mother.
I shouted loudly: "Prick me, use the golden needle to prick the acupoint, and ask for God's help."
Yes, the method of pricking gold acupuncture points to invite gods can be regarded as a kind of secret method, but the method of offering sacrifices and inviting mandrills that Lao Hui once used is much gentler. The method of pricking gold acupuncture points is to stimulate the body's potential, Cunsi Communicate the power of the 'Heavenly Soldiers and Heavenly Generals' so that the body can withstand it. This is how many Taoist priests traveling around the world become inexplicably powerful.
Of course, a price must be paid, which is to worship the requested god within a certain period of time. The number of days is defined according to the degree of borrowing.
This secret method is useless, because there is definitely a limit to borrowing power. Not to mention reaching the level of Hui Gen'er's Vajra Body, even Lao Hui's mandrill sacrifice can't compare, not even half as much.
Besides, Taoist priests are for fighting, not pretending to be strong men. If the golden needle pricks an acupuncture point in the wrong direction, it will accidentally cause hemiplegia.
But there is no doubt that this method is most suitable here and now! In addition, Brother Chengxin’s technique will definitely not turn me into hemiplegia.
When I yelled like this, Brother Chengxin finally reacted and shouted: "Old Zhang, use your gun to deal with these eight tits and wait for half a minute." Then he dragged me over.
Eight tits! The weasel was stimulated again and screamed and rushed towards Brother Chengxin, but at this moment, Lao Zhang's gunshot sounded in time, and a piece of iron sand exploded on the weasel.
Lao Zhang is honest and never talks nonsense when he works!
At this time, Brother Chengxin's first golden needle had already pierced my body. Then, his hand shadows were flying, and the needle landed on me almost without hesitation. This was a sign of skill and no hesitation.
After just a short while, I was pricked like a hedgehog by Brother Chengxin. Brother Chengxin said to me very proudly: "The biggest method of opening acupoints stimulates many important acupoints. You can use it to the greatest extent." .”
I glanced at Brother Chengxin with tears in my eyes. To deal with this monster, do you need to tie me up like this? I don't need the maximum leverage, just because of my tactics, just to hold off the monster.
However, it was too late for me to say anything. Lao Zhang shouted: "Hurry up, I can't hold it anymore." While Lao Zhang was shouting, he was still loading bullets. A sharpshooter like Lao Zhang would shoot at extremely fast speeds. In front of a weasel, you will miss a gun. Besides, the damage of this kind of firearm to this monster is limited.
Out of 'anger', I kicked Brother Chengxin away and yelled, "Go help Lao Zhang." Then I closed my eyes, made hand gestures, recited incantations, and began to ask God for help.
The preparation time for this kind of technique does not take long. I believe that Brother Chengxin will be able to hold it with his physical training since childhood.
In the Land of Accumulating Yin, my soul power almost reached its peak, and I soon connected with an inexplicable power.
I shouted loudly, stepped on my feet three times, and used my upper body strength. The next moment, a surging force instantly filled my whole body. I almost gasped for breath and wanted to vent. When I opened my eyes, I saw Brother Chengxin being raped. The weasel slapped its butt with its 'hairy hand' and was furious.
I rushed over without saying a word, endured the strong "strange smell", and hit the weasel's head for a while. As a result, the weasel was knocked away several steps in a daze.
I was also dizzy, fumed by its smell.
I endured the discomfort and said to Brother Chengxin: "Wait a minute, I will clamp it. You hurry up and use the golden needle to seal the acupoint!"
"Well!" Brother Chengxin's eyes were aggrieved, because he was slapped on the butt by these eight boobs just now!
I wanted to say something painfully to Brother Chengxin, I understand, but it was too late. The weasel screamed strangely and rushed forward, and I rushed forward without hesitation. At this time, in my ears, there was a sound. I heard the little fox's excited roar, and then I realized that this guy had been on my shoulder.
It's just that the roaring voice doesn't sound like a big demon. It's so tender. It's probably that its soul is incomplete, so it has lost most of its memory, and turned into this kind of tender fox!
'Peng' I punched the weasel hard on the face. It had a sad look on its face, probably blaming me for not being pity, but its hands were not idle either. It hit me on the arm with its paw, and I immediately felt a sense of sadness. Feeling about to break.
The little fox was probably fully awake at this moment. Seeing how fiercely we were fighting, he jumped up and down on my shoulder with joy.
But at this moment, the weasel suddenly looked at the little fox with bright eyes, and his eyes were vicious.
The little fox immediately hid behind my head. From the corner of my eye, I saw it cautiously sticking out its head and looking quietly.
I'm holding back my anger, you're such a big monster, a big monster! See how majestic my silly tiger looks every time? !