After staying in the hospital for a while, Qi Lan returned home to recuperate.
She had lost a lot of weight and it was difficult for her to even lift her arms, let alone do heavy work. Feng Ning took care of all the housework and found a set of fitness exercises on the Internet, drew them on paper, and did them with her mother.
Feng Ning resumed his normal school life, attending classes during the day and going home at night. Qi Lan had to go to the hospital for treatment regularly.
Sometimes when she suffers from insomnia at night, Feng Ning searches online to see how long a woman can live after breast cancer metastasis. Many answers say that currently there are many medical methods to control breast cancer, and that it is the most treatable malignant tumor.
She needed to watch these before she could fall asleep. The next day, she told Qi Lan with full energy, "Experts say that the mortality rate of breast cancer is not high. Western countries treat it as a chronic disease. The most important thing is to relax your mind and don't think too much."
Every time she heard it, Qi Lan would smile, "Yes, Mom has been feeling much better lately, and her appetite has improved a lot, too."
Feng Ning is smart and clever, but she is far from being a genius. She can only endure hardships, more than most people.
The family didn't have the conditions to hire a caregiver, so Feng Ning would take the bus home after school in the afternoon, buy some vegetables on the way, and go home to cook for her mother. Then she would accompany her to do some exercises, take a shower, and go back to her room to study. She would study for a few hours, peel some fruit, go to talk to Qi Lan, and wait until her mother fell asleep before continuing to study.
Feng Ning directly compressed the time wasted on the way home and back from school into sleep. She went to bed at 1 a.m., woke up at 6 a.m., and slept for half an hour in the classroom at noon.
Life is filled with busyness, but as long as her mother is around, Feng Ning is already very satisfied.
On the day when the results of the final exam for the second semester of the senior year of high school came out, many people crowded in front of the top 100 list to see their results, and Jiang Wen was among them. He saw his name, and according to the order, he became the second place.
And Feng Ning, who had been ranked outside the top 50 in the grade, returned to the top of the list:
1. Feng Ning, Class 1[9], Senior High School
2. Jiang Wen, Class 1, Grade 1[9]
There were only two lines of black words on a blue background, separated by a layer of glass. There were low voices talking nearby:
"The top three in the grade this time are again the two super academic masters from Class 9."
"Feng Ning and Jiang Wen, why are they here again? They again! Are they conjoined twins?"
"Yes, the two of them, a male and female evil duo."
"... ..."
Both of them.
Feng Ning and Jiang Wen.
them.
They are together.
Jiang Wen felt a strange, secret sense of satisfaction.
He felt it was very strange, but he liked the feeling of being mentioned together with Feng Ning.
—In the eyes of others, it seems that the two of them are in the same group.
After staring at him for a long time, I heard a familiar teasing voice: "Hey, Jiang Wen, I'm lying on your head again."
Controlling his unnecessary emotions, Jiang Wen tilted his head.
There was a slight smile on her lips, and she folded her hands to block the excessive sunlight in front of her eyes.
He hummed softly.
Feng Ning said, "Am I awesome?"
Jiang Wen said, "It's OK."
"How does it feel to be the familiar second one again?"
"good."
"?"
The two had been fighting for a year, and this was the first time Jiang Wen reacted so calmly. Feng Ning turned around and looked at him in confusion, a little disappointed, "It's boring. Now that I've trained you to be thick-skinned, I can't easily provoke you."
"Feng Ning..."
"what."
"I think so."
"Um?"
Jiang Wen paused and didn't say anything else, "Nothing, I'm leaving."
Before Feng Ning could react, he had already turned and left. She shouted at his back, "Master, remember to study hard during the holidays."
Jiang Wen didn't look back, but raised his hand proudly.
I think.
Than one person when one.
Having you in second place makes me even happier.
After the summer vacation, the second year of high school started, and a large number of new students enrolled. As a representative of the outstanding students of grade 1x, Feng Ning gave a speech to the new students in the small auditorium.
Looking at the crowds of people below the stage, she remained calm and pulled the microphone, just like she did at the flag-raising stage, "Good afternoon, teachers and students. Let me briefly introduce myself."
"I'm Feng Ning from Class 9 of Senior 2. I'm a classmate of half of the people here, and a senior of the other half. After my speech today, I may become a role model for all of you."
This brazen opening caused a burst of laughter from the audience.
Shuangyao was recording her video with her cell phone below.
Xi Gaoyuan clapped along with the others and said to Zhao Binlin, "Feng Ning really hasn't changed at all, he's still very crazy."
"She's truly the most amazing person I've ever met."
Hearing other people's comments about Feng Ning, Jiang Wen smiled in his heart.
"Before the teacher assigned me this speech, she specifically told me not to mess around. She asked me to talk about the advantages and characteristics of the school in all aspects based on my own personal experience and small details, and to express my sense of belonging to the school between the lines."
"Chinese people value subtlety. My teacher also told me to be tactful when writing my speech. I should praise myself first, but the main point should be to praise the school. I know you won't buy it, because I won't buy it either."
The Iron Lady's face turned green with anger.
This time, there were not only applause from the audience, but also whistles and cheers. Feng Ning brought today's opening ceremony to a small climax.
She just has this infectious energy.
The infectious power that makes people listen to her attentively.
Just like last time, the audience, who were originally absent-minded, pricked up their ears unconsciously after laughing, waiting for her next words.
Waiting for the applause to die down, Feng Ning continued: "In The Crowd, it says that when people are in a group, their thinking becomes very simple and they are easily infected by slogans. But this is all false, perfunctory and meaningless."
"Let me give you an example. A year ago, someone stood in the same position as me and gave a speech as a freshman representative. What did he say?"
Feng Ning learned it again, "A person's life is a life of struggle. From this moment on, let us work together with the spirit of perseverance to create a better tomorrow for Kai Tak."
This time it was Jiang Wen's turn to look green.
—He was the freshman representative.
"Look, this passage is very positive, isn't it? Very inspiring, isn't it? But except for me, I guess no one remembers it."
Most people started laughing again.
Feng Ning straightened his expression, "He said that a person's life is a life of struggle. But I want to say that a person's life is a life of tragedy, including me. We all live in tragedy."
"I've encountered a lot of bad things. I've been at the bottom and even felt desperate about this fucked up life. But I still try to live. Yes, I'm a person who tries to live. No matter what happens, I will try to live."
The simpler the words, the more penetrating they are. There was total silence. Jiang Wen was no longer angry. Like everyone else, he began to listen to her speech attentively and with admiration.
Zhao Binlin was sitting next to them. He accidentally glanced at Jiang Wen and suddenly had a strange feeling.
He recalled Jiang Wen's eyes and expression.
Zhao Binlin wondered why he saw a little bit of... obsession in it.
obsessed
“Nietzsche once said: I want you to observe yourself from a great distance.”
Feng Ning spoke each word with a deep voice that spread from the loudspeaker to every corner of the small auditorium. "A broad perspective will always dilute tragedy. If we climb high enough, we will reach a height where tragedy will no longer seem tragic."
“When you open your eyes and see the tragedy of life, and realize how awful it is — that’s when your success begins.”
"I hope that what I say here today can be a gift to you when you turn sixteen."
After he finished speaking, the whole audience was silent for at least ten seconds.
Then there was thunderous applause that lasted for a long time.
Fengning is not over yet.
She placed her hands on both sides of the podium and continued leisurely: "Finally, I want to return to the essence of this speech. What is the essence? The essence is the main point that the teacher told me - Kai Tak is far better, more broad-minded, and more inclusive than you think."
"Why?"
Feng Ning smiled and concluded, "Because it taught and tolerated students like me."
Amidst the loudest applause, she said:
"—Welcome everyone to Kai Tak High School."
Feng Ning's speech later became the most classic speech among the freshmen representatives of Qide, and no one could surpass it. Even long after that, her legend still existed in the world.
Another summer comes to an end.
Life is no big deal, everything will pass and everything will be fine.
On an ordinary, sunny afternoon, Feng Ning returned home.
"Mom, I'm back—"
The room was very quiet, so quiet that Feng Ning froze in place.
Schopenhauer wrote in his book that fate always tells people this truth: everything that happens is bound to happen and is inevitable.
After seven rounds of chemotherapy, the cancer still metastasized to the bones and Qi Lan fainted at home.
Qi Lan had been keeping it a secret from Feng Ning.
So she didn't know that Qi Lan's health was already very bad.
The ambulance arrived and stopped at the entrance of Yujiang Lane. The patient was sent to the hospital, and the doctor told Feng Ning that he might have to prepare for the worst outcome.
Looking at her mother who was on a ventilator, she collapsed and asked, "Her condition is so serious, why didn't anyone tell me before?"
"Your mother said that you are still studying."
"What's wrong with studying? I am my mother's family member. Why are you helping the patient hide the family members?"
Doctor: "In fact, your mother is not very cooperative with the treatment. She has rejected many of our treatment plans."
"Why?"
"The patient's original words were that she didn't want to stay in the hospital and waste money, which would drain the family's savings." The doctor said calmly, "Your mother wanted to leave you some money so that she could feel at ease when she passed away. We have no right to interfere with her decision."
"Then..." Feng Ning maintained her final calmness. It was very difficult for her to say a word, and after a long pause, she asked, "If I get treated well now, how long can I live at most?"
“Half a year to a year.”
The doctor left.
Shuang Yao looked at Feng Ning squatting on the ground with distress. She walked over and said, "Ning Ning..."
Feng Ning was trembling a little, hugging her knees and burying her face, "Don't comfort me, no need, it's okay, it's okay."
It's fine.
Who is Feng Ning
She is a strong person.
When Qi Lan had her second relapse, Feng Ning had already prepared herself mentally.
So, she was not afraid of Qilan's death.
Not fear.
Just afraid,
I'm afraid I've wasted a lot of time.
I'm afraid I haven't been with her enough.
Feng Ning gathered all his documents and went to Kai Tak to apply for leave of absence.
She came alone and left alone.
Didn't say goodbye to anyone.
After walking out of the school gate, Feng Ning looked back again.
The sky is blue, the clouds are white, and the weather is crisp and clear. The bell rings, and the school is still lively. Boys are chasing and playing in the corridors during class breaks, and girls are blushing, holding hands and talking about their thoughts.
Everything is beautiful.
No one noticed that one person was missing, and no one cared that one person was missing.
Maybe... someone still cares.
Feng Ning thought of Jiang Wen.
She smiled, hailed a taxi and left.
In the hospital, Meng Hanmo handed her a card and said, "There is 200,000 yuan in it. Study hard and don't worry about money."
Qi Lan needed treatment and needed money, so Feng Ning did not refuse. She said, "Brother, I will pay you back later."
Meng Hanmo frowned and asked, "When will you go to school again?"
Feng Ning still said the same thing: "I want to accompany my mother."
"You're almost in your third year of high school. Don't you regret dropping out now?"
“No regrets.”
In the hospital corridor late at night, her voice was clear: "Even if you let me choose a long, long time from now, I will still do exactly the same thing as I do now."
Maybe Feng Ning was too greedy.
I also thought about borrowing her for a few more years so that Qi Lan could watch her grow up safely.
But she can't accompany her mother for much longer. So now, she has to cherish every minute and every second.
Even if I'm alone in the future, it doesn't matter.
The author has something to say: 1. I found the aerobics exercises on the Internet and drew them when I was searching for breast cancer on Zhihu.
2. Send out small red envelopes today, and have fun in the midst of hardship! ~ Although the novel is bitter, the reality is sweet!