Feng Yuan became excited: "Do you think I want this sentence? You show the arrogance that you are in the army, such a humble and pleading person is not worthy to be my son. But your life belongs to your own. Anyone else!"
Brother Chuan lowered his head slightly and said: "Mom, I don't care about the others, as long as you don't abandon me, I don't want to be abandoned a second time. I don't go against you not because I am weak and cowardly in my heart, but because I respect you. .
Since childhood, you have been very strict with us, asking us to go to the best school and receive the best education, but you have never asked us if we really want to. You asked me to join the army and go to the postgraduate entrance examination. I never refused. This is not because I am willing, but because I am afraid that against your will, you will abandon us again, so I force myself to do it.
Our special tasks are very dangerous, and others are afraid of death, so are us. I am not King Kong, and I am not afraid of anything. We are also flesh and blood, and we will also be afraid. There were eight months before and after this mission, and every day of these eight months, I never slept well for fear of being silenced. I can't say that I did my best, but I must try my best to fit your mind as much as possible. "
Feng Yuan was so stunned on the spot, and got along with these two children for more than 20 years, always thinking that he gave them the best life, the best education, and for the first time knew the true thoughts of the children.
Feng Yuan didn't know what to say. Brother Chuan continued: "Mom, please believe me. I don't ask you to be proud of my every action, but every choice I make will not make you feel ashamed. . If you really feel that I am ashamed of you, I can only apologize to you. But I hope that in the past two decades, I will not deprive me of the right to call you your mother."
Feng Yuan, who had been strong for nine days, finally cried and said, "I was negligent, and I forgot your feelings. You have suffered."
Brother Chuan wiped Feng Yuan's tears, and said: "Mom, I will never feel bitter with you. I'm fine, I'm really fine, don't cry."
Feng Yuan wiped away his tears and said: "My son is the best fighter of the Republic and will always be my pride."
Brother Chuan said lightly: "My mother will always be my sky."
Feng Yuan asked: "Will you blame me?"
Brother Chuan shook his head and said, "Never."
Feng Yuan nodded, touched Brother Chuan's head, and said, "You must take care of yourself in the future, and you must have hope of survival at any time."
Brother Chuan looked out the window and said: "This is not the first time I wander on the edge of death, but this time, it is the most dangerous one, but I feel unusually lonely and lonely. My whole life seems to be for others. Live, everything is for others, never for yourself. Mom, do you know what it feels like?"
There is no doubt that Feng Yuan didn't know. Feng Yuan has provided technical support in the periphery for so long, but has never been a special lover. How can Feng Yuan understand these things
Brother Chuan seemed to say to himself: "Mom, you must not know what I was thinking when the bullet of Brother Lei was shot out. What I thought was that I was relieved, and I no longer have to worry about being fooled. died."
Feng Yuan burst into tears again, and Brother Chuan slightly raised the corners of his mouth and said: "Mom, don't worry, I will continue to do it, because I still have you!"
Feng Yuan wiped his tears and said, "Child, listen well, you have to live for yourself. I have given you a good environment for you to live well. Only if you live well can I feel happy. "
Brother Chuan nodded obediently and said, "I see."
The identity of the adopted son made these two people grow up so fast that Feng Yuan gradually forgot their identity as a child. After thinking about it carefully, Feng Yuan couldn't remember how the two children looked like when they acted like a baby.
After Brother Chuan was seriously ill, he seemed to be a different person. I don’t like to laugh anymore, and I am somewhat similar to Brother Qiao. Guan Zheng took a large bunch of flowers to see Brother Chuan in the ward. Brother Chuan sat in a wheelchair and looked out the window. He just stared blankly, not knowing what he was looking at.
Guan Zheng put the flower aside and said, "Brother Chuan, what are you doing?"
Brother Chuan turned around and said, "You are here!"
Guan Zheng felt abnormal, and pretended to say lightly: "The armed police's response to special operations is so slow? Is it because the doctors are not good enough, and they haven't been cured?"
Brother Chuan shook his head and said, "No, they are very good doctors."
Guan Zheng sat down and said, "I'm here just to say thank you."
Brother Chuan smiled and said: "You can pull you down and thank me. Do you think I am saving you? I am completing the task, okay?"
Guanzheng nodded: "Okay. But thank you anyway."
Brother Chuan waved his hand and said, "If you talk about this again, I will be in a hurry."
Guan Zheng looked at Brother Chuan, and Brother Chuan said, "What's the matter? Looking at me like this is like looking at a big girl."
Guan Zheng said, "I think you are different."
Brother Chuan's face is always melancholy: "Well, people will always change. I have been wandering on the edge of death for so many years, and I have never been afraid. This time, I really feel death."
Guan Zheng asked, "Are you afraid?"
Brother Chuan shook his head and said, "There is no fear. Since the day I put on the military uniform, I have never thought about being afraid. In comparison, I am more afraid of mission failure."
Guan Zheng patted Brother Chuan on the shoulder and said, "Are you too nervous?"
Brother Chuan smiled bitterly and said: "I have been doing special love since I joined the army, and I never know what relaxation is. Only when I am in a coma can I have no thoughts, and only when I am in the hospital will be relative. Relax your brain and think about my own business."
Guan Zheng comforted and said: "You also know that I am studying criminal psychology. You are under too much pressure. Speaking of which, this is my first time as a special situation. The task of our criminal police before was also very dangerous, but There is no such test of a person’s psychological quality. The special difficulty is not only a contest between IQ and physical strength, but also a psychological struggle. A task does not necessarily have to be a complete success, and sometimes failure is also a success."
Brother Chuan said suddenly: "I want to retire, I want to go home."
Guanzheng nodded, and then asked, "Have you thought about it? If you think about it, then may I ask, would you really do this?"
Brother Chuan is lost in thought, have you thought about it? Will you do it when you think it over? Two such simple questions, Chuan Ge had no way to answer. Brother Chuan has lived for more than 20 years. When did he make his own decision? (End of this chapter)