Qin Yining tried to recall everything that happened today, recalling the way Liancheng was talking to her, thinking about it, but was a little uncertain, and soon his mind became muddy.
Is it really because my recent experience is too strange, that feeling is too familiar, that makes her think of Sheng Qianchen all the time
Or on the contrary, because she wanted to Sheng Qianchen too much, so there was a lot of rumors, no matter what happened, she felt weird and problematic
Although her experience is peculiar, but think about it carefully, it seems that every one of them explained to her all right
Is that because of Sheng Qianchen? Because she has him in her heart? Is the problem with her
Alas, I guess it’s impossible to understand if I just think so...
But no matter which of these two things is the cause and which is the effect, one thing is certain, that is, she really wants to Sheng Qianchen.
I really want to think about it, dream about it, think about it when I wake up, I can't stop crying when I think about it, just like how wronged I have been.
Qin Yining didn't know what was wrong with her. After that rainy night, she was heartbroken and hospitalized with a high fever. She almost died of a dead body. When she woke up, the first thing was to make up her mind to completely draw a line with Sheng Qianchen from now on. .
From now on, don't think about him again, for yourself, for the children, and for him, leaving a way for the three of them to survive.
And she has been doing that since that day, and she has done it too. At the original company, she was entangled in by Manager Zhang, and she was devastated. She didn't have time to think about Sheng Qianchen.
Later Qiao Xin came, and she calmly said that she would never have any contact with Sheng Qianchen from now on, and she wanted to let him go and let him be free.
Next, in the face of the pressure of unemployment, she just wanted to find a job, struggling to live out her personality for the sake of her children. She was so cold-hearted that she completely forgot about Sheng Qianchen. Whenever she thought of it, she wanted to be so embarrassed. , What do you want him to do? There is no one in the world, so it is useless to think about it.
but-
Since finding this job, Qin Yining has not only improved her living standards, but also lived a life like a pig. What's more terrifying is that her heart started to move around at some point! She began to miss Sheng Qianchen!
Every accident, every surprise, and every time she felt like being cared for silently by this job, she would think of Sheng Qianchen. To her, it seemed that only Sheng Qianchen in the world would give her such meticulous care. , Sometimes even caring too much, like keeping a pet.
That's why she was suspicious, but she shouldn't. What people said is so reasonable, how could it be possible, she must be careless.
Qin Yining couldn't help but think a little depressed, saying that she was full of warmth and desire. Before, she couldn't find a job and was worried that when she became a dog from exhaustion, why didn't she think about Sheng Qianchen, how could she think now? She still seems to be too idle!
Sheng Qianchen...
When I think of him, the defense in my heart is useless. He breaks into her heart almost immediately, not even giving her the chance to drive him away.
Qin Yining remembered the dream she had when she passed out just now, what she wanted to say in the dream was what she wanted to say.
She is so tired, really tired, she just wants to find a corner, hide, away from everything in the past, or let her go to sleep like that, stay asleep, don’t wake up, if Sheng Qianchen can hold her again, Just better...
In fact, she knew that she was escaping. After so much entanglement, letting go, struggling, and torturing with Sheng Qianchen, she was really scared, even though she thought she was not afraid, she was still scared, she still escaped. .
She just left Sheng Qianchen behind, and the good name is to let him be free and let him live the life he wants. In fact, she ran away first and was unwilling to face him together...
She didn't want to, she loved him so much...
But what can she do if she doesn't escape
She is so stupid and stupid, she is deceived every time, let alone Jiang Qing, even a random person on the street can deceive her! Is it to let her hold a defensive heart to everyone in the future? Make her suspicious, don't believe anyone? She can't do it!
She grew up like this, and the people she met were good and bad, but she was alive like this, running rampant according to her own will.
Good people become good friends with her in the end, bad people can hurt her a lot, she is not afraid, and does not care, just as a bite by a dog, and will not be with each other in the future, she is still the free and sunny her in the end.
However, unlike Sheng Qianchen, she was not the only one who was deceived. She also hurt Sheng Qianchen. In retrospect, every time she was deceived, Sheng Qianchen was always affected.
In the end, she postponed the marriage contract for the villain Jiang Qing, and even almost knocked off the child, which broke Sheng Qianchen's heart.
She regrets it, she wants to change, but can she really change it? Can she guarantee that she will not be deceived again in the future? Can you guarantee that Sheng Qianchen will not be hurt again in the future
She didn't know, she only knew that even if she changed, it was useless, because her pride prevented her from lowering her head when facing Sheng Dingtian.
She knew that everyone in the Sheng family, from Sheng Dingtian to Sheng Jinghao, could not afford to look down upon her, even the Sheng Qianchen whom she loved so much...
In their minds, she was stupid and stupid, with a lowly status, she was not worthy of Sheng Qianchen at all, and she was not good to Sheng Qianchen!
Whenever she thinks of this, Qin Yining feels that she and Sheng Qianchen must have no future. Even if she has fallen in love with Sheng Qianchen, she is willing to apologize to him and behave like a baby, she will treat him better in the future, and she will listen to him and stop being so nonsense... It's useless, because she can't change her origin.
And the origin is Sheng Dingtian’s most important Dong
Xi, since she can't change her origin, Sheng Dingtian will never accept her. He told her that she should never enter the Sheng family. Isn't it because her origin is not noble enough
And her pride did not allow her to bow her head with Sheng Dingtian. She didn't want to enter the door of the Sheng family at all!
These two things, like two big mountains, pressed Qin Yining's heart, so she didn't have the courage to insist on staying with Sheng Qianchen.
Before, she didn’t love Sheng Qianchen, or she fell in love with him and she didn’t realize it. At that time, she could be with Sheng Qianchen without caring. Anyway, Sheng Qianchen was so kind to her. They were together, and it’s impossible to live a day. At that time, the big deal broke up, and she had nothing to regret.
But now she found that she had fallen in love with Sheng Qianchen, and instead she couldn't live it off like before.
When there is no affection, anyone and anyone can be together, and anyone can be separated from anyone, but they live together for a while, and the fate will come together, and the fate will go away. No one can complain.
But people are emotional animals. People are afraid that they will be forced to separate. Since she found out that she fell in love with Sheng Qianchen, every time they were awkward and separated, she felt heartache to death.
Every time she vowed that she would never do this again in the future, she would no longer want him, she would not quarrel with him in the future, and she would not break up with him in the future.
But what's the use
They think if they don't see them, make trouble when they see them, and finally break up unhappy, saying all kinds of unfeeling words, which part is not heartbroken.
Until the last time they broke up, the two of them, together with their children, almost lost their lives...
Qin Yining was scared, really scared, she was afraid that even if she was desperate to be with Sheng Qianchen, she would still face such and other obstructions, and finally they would separate again.
She has a bad premonition, thinking that if they break up again and again, they will really die one day!
So she escaped, even if Sheng Qianchen clearly thought that the child was gone, he would kneel down with her, and asked her to start again. She must escape. She escaped because she knew that Sheng Qianchen’s love for her was too deep and too heavy. She really can't afford such a love, she really doesn't want to live up to such a love.
She is Qin Yining, Qin Yining, who is self-willed and disobedient and refuses to grow up. Why should she bear the love of Sheng Qianchen? What did she give him back
In the dream, Sheng Qianchen said that she did not want to face the wind and rain with him, saying that she was not worthy of him. She knew that Sheng Qianchen would never say that to her, that was actually her own voice, she was not worthy of Sheng Qianchen, She will only drag him down.
He should marry a woman who is the right one, just like Sheng Dingtian asked. Others don’t know, but Qin Yining knows how big Sheng Qianchen’s heart is. With his vision so far, he is destined to emerge on a larger stage, and she It can't help him at all.
(End of this chapter)