Sun Shouyi was stunned when he was asked. This is the most unwilling question he wants to face. In principle, he knows that life is more important than everything. But in his heart, he has been in the official career for half his life, and the official career has long been integrated into his. In the blood, the reason why he has been reluctant to accept public treatment is because public treatment will definitely affect his future career development.
Even though his career development has been obviously hindered, he still has an unwilling idea in his heart. Maybe he can get another opportunity and make a comeback. It is because of this unwillingness to give up that makes his heart more tangled. Although he knows that this possibility is extremely low, he still reluctant to give up.
Sun Shouyi glanced at Fu Hua: "Do I have to choose one of the two?"
"It's up to you to decide whether to choose or not," Fu Hua said, looking at Sun Shouyi's eyes. "Actually, Secretary Sun, you probably already know the answer. It's just that you can't make up your mind. You came to me. It's not really me. There is a way to cure you, but you want me to help you make this determination."
Sun Shouyi laughed a few times: "Yes, I can't make this determination. This is something I have been fighting for half of my life. If you want me to quit all at once, I can't do it in my heart."
Fu Hua smiled and shook his head: "Secretary Sun, what do you think you have been fighting for half your life? How much practical significance does he have for you?"
Sun Shouyi thought for a while, but found that the things he cared about couldn't be described with Fu Hua in words, so he smiled bitterly and said: "These things may be unclear in one sentence or two sentences."
"You don't know well, let me tell you. It's nothing more than making merits and accomplishments. What you enjoy is probably the kind of majesty and domination of being looked up at by others. But you have thought about it, even if it is. You have really made a contribution. It is not your own achievement, but the result of the coordinated operation of the entire government machine. After a few years, who will remember what you have done?"
Sun Shouyi was still struggling: "That's what I said, but it's not just personal vanity. I think there should be something else here."
"What else?" Fu Hua laughed, "Don't tell me that you care about power and money beauties. Although you have been acting unruly in terms of money beauties in recent years, It’s just something attached to your fishing net. In your heart, you don’t really care about it."
Sun Shouyi smiled bitterly, and did not say anything. Looking at his own heart, Sun Shouyi had to admit that what Fu Hua said were in line with his true thoughts. In his bones, he is still passionate about power, and beauty money is a product of power.
Some of the things he did in the National Development and Reform Commission, including Wang Li, his lover, or the money he obtained from Sun Zhaohui and Du Yan, were all psychological self-compensation after he was frustrated in the pursuit of power. These just gave him some balance in his heart, and he never felt really proud of it.
Looking at Sun Shouyi, there is still no clear statement. Fu Hua is also a little speechless. It seems that power has really penetrated into Sun Shouyi's bones. It is really harder than anything for him to quit this. But these are things that Sun Shouyi must abstain from, and he also needs to abstain from himself. It is useless to rely on others to coerce.
In the final analysis, the origin of depression is that a person has been affected by negative emotions for a long time, which leads to negative emotions dominating his emotions, making some of his positive and optimistic emotions unable to return to a normal state. Specifically, Sun Shouyi is him. There is no way to get rid of the troubles and gains and losses in the official career, and there is no way to get rid of the fear of being held accountable for illegal acts. Over time, it can only sink in negative emotions.
Fu Hua smiled bitterly and said: "The world knows the gods, but the fame and fame can not be forgotten! Where is the ancient and modern? The grass is gone. The world knows the gods, only gold and silver can not be forgotten! Too many, and for a long time, the eyes are closed. The world knows that the gods are good, but only the wife can not forget! The king says kindness on his birthday, and the king died with others. The world knows that the gods are good, only children and grandchildren cannot forget! , Filial sons and grandchildren who have met? Secretary Sun, I have told you what to do, but it is useless to know the truth. If you want to really cure your disease, you can only see if you can’t make up your mind."
Sun Shouyi smiled bitterly and said: "It seems that in order to save my life, I have no other choice, but giving up rights should still not completely solve this problem. The key is after giving up power, what should I do next?"
"I have given you a clear direction. I think you can disclose your condition to the organization and ask to leave your job for medical treatment, and then use the connections you have established for so many years to engage in something truly meaningful, such as going to remote areas. To help the poor, go to some areas with severe desertification to do some ecological management work. Anyway, you can't let yourself be idle. Only by working and living to the fullest can your depression be cured without treatment."
Sun Shouyi smiled: "You guy must have not done anything good. The suggestions you gave me are all the hardest and most difficult jobs. I only saw some official figures a few days ago. There are more than 20 poverty alleviation cadres who have sacrificed their lives on the front line of poverty alleviation work."
Fu Hua also smiled: "Even if you sacrifice your life on the front line of poverty alleviation work, it is more meaningful than finding a roof to jump from above?"
Sun Shouyi's expression became serious: "Yes, looking back, I seem to live in official articles for the rest of my life, doing something meaningless. I should do something that can be remembered. My business is done. Alright, Fu Hua, I'll just follow the advice you gave me."
"Secretary Sun, I am very happy that you can accept my suggestion, but there are two points you must remember. No matter what you do, you are doing it for yourself. Be kind to others. Only in this way can you live happily. The second is to start and end well. You can’t give up halfway, otherwise you will still have to go back into the vicious circle of depression.”
Sun Shouyi pondered for a while, then nodded and said: "Okay, I know all of this, I'm leaving, I'm going back to deal with some things."
Fu Hua glanced at Sun Shouyi. He was not sure what Sun Shouyi would do after leaving him. Some things are easy to know and difficult to do. Although Sun Shouyi seemed to be persuaded by him at this moment, he could not be sure after Sun Shouyi returned. , He would definitely follow his suggestions. Maybe Sun Shouyi changed his mind the moment he walked out of his office
However, these are all Sun Shouyi's own destiny. What choice he has to make will bear the consequences of his choice accordingly. Fu Hua smiled and said: "Then goodbye, Secretary Sun, I hope you can live happily next time you meet."
Sun Shouyi nodded and left without saying anything. Fu Hua looked at his leaving back with some speechlessness. In his heart, he hoped that when he saw Sun Shouyi again, Sun Shouyi could live happily, but who knows the future.
When he was a boy, he liked Su Shi's classic water tone song very much, but he only liked the beautiful language of the word, and he didn't understand the deep meaning contained in the word. With the enrichment of his experience, he understood the helplessness of life contained in the words. People have sorrows and joys, and the moon is cloudy and clear. This matter is hard to come by in ancient times. What a painful realization this is
Only through experience will you understand that most people in the world cannot have a perfect life, but most people still have to live hard. They don't know when their life will become wandering and sorrowful. All they can do is to generalize and endure, and most people can only take the five flavors of life in their hearts and taste them for themselves.
It is these people who make up this world and witness the changes of the times.
Everywhere in this world, everyone, is hateful and cute. They are your fellow travelers in this world. Maybe you don't like what they do, maybe you think their behavior is weird and perverted, but you have to accept these, because accepting them is equivalent to accepting yourself.
When he walked out of Fu Hua's office, Sun Shouyi began to think about what he should do next. He thought he needed to make a lot of arrangements and many things need to be dealt with. But after some trade-offs, things were far less complicated than he thought.
He is not an indispensable role in the Development and Reform Commission. If he talks about his illness, maybe the leader will act like sympathy, but he will definitely not insist on keeping him in the post. The greatest possibility is After a little hypocrisy, he would agree to leave his job and recuperate.
Next is Wang Li. Wang Li has been the closest person to him during this period of time. Although he has never shown the intention to leave him during this period of time, it is simply because of him. It's just sympathy. In fact, before he became ill, Wang Li once asked him to let her go. He was ill, but Wang Li stopped mentioning this stubbornness. It must be because of Wang Li's inner kindness. She couldn't bear to stimulate him again when he became ill.
Shen Jia has basically regarded him as a passer-by, although he came to see him when he was directing traffic, probably because of his son. After that, I didn't even call once, and I didn't want to know what his current situation was.
As for the son, Sun Shouyi was based on his father's love for him and did not want to inform him of his situation. He was still a student with little financial ability, and let him know that his condition suddenly increased his troubles.