In the noisy street market, Fu Naichuan poured a jar of wine and threw it on the ground. He walked through the crowd alone, expressionless. Tired of walking, I leaned against the corner in a daze. At this moment, a sad suona sound came from the end of the street. A group of people dressed in white carried the coffin and passed by, and the many people who followed were crying, and the cry almost resounded through the entire street.
Fu Naichuan closed his eyes and plugged his ears.
"… Noisy."
A poor man stole the wine again and was dizzy, lying on the ground slanted. The angry shop owner led people out, and a group of people punched and kicked the poor man. After the people were gone, the poor man rolled on the ground in pain, couldn't help vomiting, and crawled away in his own vomit while giggling drunkenly.
When he was alone, Fu Naichuan felt the purest. There is no need to speak, just one person can stay for a day and spend a lifetime like this. Everything seems to be integrated into one. He doesn't want to wake up, laugh when he wants to laugh all the time, cry when he wants to cry, love without reservation when he wants to love, and hate when he wants to hate. Crazy, do whatever you want, feel free, you can't tell the difference between dreams and reality gradually, die in a dream, don't wake up.
As if recalling something from the past.
There was a chubby little baby in the arms of the woman. The little baby either eats or sleeps all day, and always closes his eyes and frowns, and rarely wakes up a few times a day. A group of uncles and aunts surrounded the woman and the baby, shaking a silver bell "dang, dang" in their hands. The little baby grinned and clucked, and slowly reached out to grab the bell. A man stood with his hands crossed and looked at him with a smile, then said softly: "Or just call him 'Chuan'. I hope he can be like a river, with a smooth life and a heart like pure water."
In the Caibazi Temple, Fu Naichuan was wrapped in a swaddle and placed on the stage to receive baptism.
The voice echoed in the temple: "God's words: love all beings, treat people with kindness. Do good, you will live your life, if you do evil, you will fall into the gate of hell, and you will never be born..."
Fu Naichuan hid in the room and looked at the joking and slapstick peers in the yard, with both sadness and envy in his eyes. At this time, Bai Xue stepped in from the door and said, "Chuanchuan~! What do you think this is?"
This woman has fair skin, shiny black hair and slightly curly hair, a small face, a very nice nose, and an extremely sweet appearance. Fu Naichuan frowned and said unhappily, "Don't call me 'Chuanchuan'!!" Bai Xue squeezed his face with a smile and said, "Why? How cute is 'Chuanchuan'!"
Fu Naichuan said, "I hate being like a girl. They all say I'm like a girl." As soon as he finished speaking, he saw what Bai Xue was holding in his hand and his whole body was gone. He hid behind the door like the wind and said, "I Don't wear this kind of clothes!!! Why buy me this kind of clothes again!!!"
Bai Xue took a newly bought little girl's skirt, and said, "Why not~ It's so beautiful, just wear it, it must be very cute!"
Fu Naichuan wiped away tears, his face turned red, and stomped, "I don't want to wear it!!! No, no, no, no, no, no, no!!!"
Bai Xue chased Fu Naichuan all over the room.
Thinking of this, Fu Naichuan suddenly opened his eyes and smiled. Bai Xue always wanted to have a girl, but before Fu Naichuan was ten years old, Fu Naichuan was the only son of Fu Chulan and Bai Xue, and because Fu Naichuan was born beautifully, Bai Xue always kept buying little girls' clothes, trying to coax him to wear them , and Fu Naichuan was very resistant to this. Therefore, he always hides when Snow White comes.
Fu Naichuan picked up an injured little dog on the side of the road. After bringing it back to heal the injury, the little dog wagged its tail and ran behind Fu Naichuan every day. At night, he slept with Fu Naichuan. But one day, a woman in Broken Armor City took the little dog to raise, and Fu Naichuan sent the little dog away. Seeing him being dragged away in horror, he barked and looked back at himself. Fu Naichuan thought about the little earth dog every day, and finally he was able to see it, but when he ran over happily, the little earth dog barked "woo woo" when he saw him, and went to hide in the corner. Fu Naichuan took a closer look, and one eye of the little dog had gone blind for some reason. Fu Naichuan was dumbfounded, looking at the reflection of himself in the frightened blind eyes of the little earth dog, feeling extraordinarily unfamiliar.
Even if the little dog was blind, Fu Naichuan still wanted to bring it back. When Bai Xue saw it, he took it and threw it away. Fu Naichuan cried and begged Bai Xue, Bai Xue took a basket with a small dog, and said, "It's just a dog. If it's a big deal, I'll find another one for you." Fu Naichuan said, "It's different."
The little dog was thrown into the garbage heap and sat helplessly on it, shivering and barking in a low voice.
Fu Naichuan was taken away by Bai Xue, and after a few steps, he looked back. He felt very uncomfortable in his heart, but he didn't know how to feel uncomfortable. I just feel sour, and feel that something has been ripped out of my heart. It was as if nothing in the world belonged to him. And his feelings don't matter.
Fu Chulan was either busy researching mechanical techniques or busy going to various occasions, and spent very little time with Bai Xue and Fu Naichuan. Fu Naichuan finally started to practice swordsmanship with other children older than him. Fu Naichuan especially likes swordsmanship, and he practices extremely hard every day. He is also very talented and makes rapid progress, for which he has been praised a lot.
Fu Naichuan won the first place again, grabbed the wooden sword and excitedly told Bai Xue, Bai Xue patted his head and said perfunctorily, "Really? Keep working hard."
Fu Naichuan was a little disappointed and walked away silently with his sword in his arms.
Hearing that Fu Chulan would soon arrive at the Armored City, Fu Naichuan told Bai Xue many times that he must tell Fu Chulan at the dinner table that he had won the first place again recently. Fu Chulan came back. At the dinner table, Fu Naichuan kept looking nervous. He glanced back and forth between the two of them. After waiting for a while, seeing that Bai Xue hadn't mentioned himself yet, worried that she had forgotten, he secretly pulled Bai Xue and said, "Mother... "
Bai Xue said impatiently: "Okay, okay." To Fu Chulan, "Chuanchuan won the first place in swordsmanship a few days ago. He insisted that I tell you."
Fu Chulan looked at Fu Naichuan, smiled slightly, touched his head and said, "Achuan is really amazing."
Fu Naichuan's whole body was about to float, and he was excited for several days, as if he had been beaten with blood. It just so happened that it was Fu Naichuan's birthday in a few days. Fu Naichuan worked harder and wanted to perform well in front of Fu Chulan on his birthday. Who knows, just the day before his birthday, Fu Chulan is leaving again temporarily.
Fu Chulan was dumbfounded. Looking at the back of Fu Chulan leaving, her eyes were a little red. He stood stupidly holding the door frame for a long time, suddenly pursed his lips, turned around and soaked in hot water for a long time, then hurried to Bai Xue and said, "Mother... I seem to have a fever."
So Fu Chulan had not left the armored city when he heard Bai Xue say that Fu Naichuan was suddenly ill. For the time being, I asked my colleagues to wait and hurried back. It turned out that Fu Naichuan was just pretending to be sick, and he was a little angry, saying that he not only wasted his time, but also lied, and that he didn't want to stay any longer before leaving. Fu Naichuan was so frightened that he cried and his face turned red. Finally, he restrained his sobbing and wiped his tears, saying, "I just want you to accompany me."
Only then did Fu Chulan's expression soften, and she hugged Fu Naichuan, but left.
Fu Chulan still feels guilty for Bai Xue and Fu Naichuan. Every few short days of company are squeezed out of the sponge as much as possible. Fu Chulan often dragged people to bring something back to Bai Xue and Fu Naichuan, which also became a thought in Fu Naichuan's dead time. But Fu Naichuan wanted to see real people more than objects.
But then there was no chance.
At the age of ten, Fu Naichuan finally had a younger sister. Fu Naichuan was lying on the side of the cradle all day, looking at the little baby girl curiously, and asked Bai Xue, "Mother, what's her name?"
Bai Xue thought for a while and said, "Call me 'Xiaomei'."
"… "
Seeing Fu Naichuan's disgust, Bai Xue blinked. Fu Naichuan said: "This name is casual and has no connotation. Let's wait for my father to come up."
Bai Xue said, "A name doesn't have to have connotations to sound good! How cute is 'Xiaomei'."
Fu Naichuan was too lazy to fight with Bai Xue.
When Bai Xue finally left temporarily, Fu Naichuan hurriedly hugged Fu Xiaomei from the cradle lightly. When Bai Xue came back, Fu Naichuan said to Bai Xue sweetly, "Mother, she is so small!"
Bai Xue hurriedly said: "Put her down!! Look at her about to fall!!!"
After Fu Xiaomei was born, she couldn't open her eyes, as if something stuck on her eyes. Bai Xue poured water to bathe her, Fu Naichuan ran to the room and hugged Fu Xiaomei, but suddenly froze in place as soon as she picked it up. I saw Fu Xiaomei's eyelids moving, as if she was trying very hard to open her eyes. Fu Naichuan was so nervous that his heart was beating wildly, and he stared at her with wide eyes. Suddenly, Fu Xiaomei's eyes opened, and on her wrinkled face, a pair of black and white and clear eyes that Fu Naichuan had never seen before were half-squinted, staring at Fu Naichuan dazedly and ignorantly, frowning. He was still slightly wrinkled, as if he was examining who the person was holding him in front of him.
The two of them stared at each other. Gradually, from the soles of his feet to his heart, Fu Naichuan felt the fear of being watched by a newborn. She was so frightened that she hugged Fu Xiaomei and ran towards Bai Xue in a posture that she might throw the things in her hands at any time, and screamed: "Mother!!! Mother!!! Her eyes are open!!! Ahhhhhhh!!! !!!!" Then he almost threw Fu Xiaomei away like a monster and threw it into Bai Xue's arms, hiding aside and gasping for breath.
When Fu Xiaomei was one year old, she gradually became known as "Mother", and her eyebrows and eyes became more and more like Bai Xue. Fu Naichuan held her to urinate, but the urine flew through an arc and onto Fu Naichuan's pants. Fu Naichuan disliked it extremely, but Fu Xiaomei giggled.
Fu Naichuan also wanted Fu Xiaomei to call him, and he said to Fu Xiaomei, "Call me brother." Fu Xiaomei immediately said, "...Mother!"
Fu Naichuan frowned and said, "It's brother!"
Fu Xiaomei still said, "...Mother!"
Fu Naichuan said angrily, "Brother!!"
Fu Xiaomei: "...Mother!"
Fu Naichuan put Fu Xiaomei on her lap and asked her, "Why don't you just call me??! I serve you like a bodhisattva every day, serving you to eat, drink and play with you, and even be spat on by you, Peeing and pulling your hair, but you just don't call me! Do you hate me!!"
But how could Fu Xiaomei answer him yes or no? Fu Naichuan took it as her acquiescence, and was angry and sad. For a few days, Fu Xiaomei hurriedly crawled over to him as soon as she saw him, and he ignored him.
Since Fu Naichuan was born, he has accompanied Bai Xue and his grandmother to offer incense in the Caibazi Temple every seven days. Later, his grandparents who loved him the most died in an accident. They did good deeds all their lives, but did not get a good death. Fu Naichuan cried and ran to the Caibazi Temple. Facing the statue, he asked why the good people didn't get good rewards, and why the wicked could put their feet on others' heads, gain fame and fortune, and live at ease. Since doing good deeds will not end well, but will have bad consequences, then what's the point of being a good person? What is the purpose of sticking to the rules and imprisoning sins for many years? Why does one have to be a good person
In the end, the idol would not speak, and would not give him an answer. Fu Naichuan was determined to find it himself.
Bai Xue asked Fu Naichuan what he wanted to do when he grew up, and Fu Naichuan said, "I don't want to grow up."
Bai Xue wondered why. Fu Naichuan said, "If you become an adult, you will be very tired."
But even at that time, Fu Naichuan felt that life was exhausting and painful.
Fu Naichuan was reluctant to talk to outsiders, and seemed sensitive and shy all the time. Contrary to Fu Naichuan, Bai Xue's temperament was a little careless, and she didn't understand Fu Naichuan's appearance of being sensitive and fragile. She took Fu Naichuan to see the doctor several times, despite Fu Naichuan's crying, losing his temper, and begging. Pushing him to forcibly join the group of peers who were having a good time, causing others to whisper and look sideways, saying, "Mother, I hope you can become happy."
But Fu Naichuan felt that the forced "happiness" made people sadder even more deeply. In order not to let Bai Xue worry any more, he tried to go out from the heart, to contact with outsiders, to join in the fun of others, to laugh, to cry. But he felt that it was not really him. He wanted to escape from the noise, the sun hurting him. Even the weak qualifications are deprived, and it is not allowed to be unhappy. It is despicable and degrading to like the dark, and it is "unsuitable" and "must" to change.
Fu Naichuan felt that he was constantly struggling. Walking in deep water every step of the way, the depressed feeling slowly climbed from the chest to the throat, mouth and nose...
Perhaps, people live, they will continue to suffer until death.
Everything in this world is uncertain, as if he is not completely sure about anything in the world. But later, he got the spirit sword that only belonged to him. Holding the sword, Fu Naichuan suddenly felt that his persistence for so many years was right. Maybe everything else will be wrong, but for him, only the sword is the belief, it will never change, it will never be wrong.
… But then, even faith was lost.
Fu Naichuan couldn't help but touched the buried soul on his waist.
Haven't used it for many years.
Just as Fu Naichuan was about to stand up, his heart palpitated again.
This is a clip from many years ago. He plunged into the water suddenly, and his long black hair spread like water plants. The blood is like a dick, like a poisonous snake, like an endless dust, more like a mother's outstretched hand, diffused in the dim water, blocking the mouth and nose, suffocating the will to survive, gently, delicately and slowly surrounded he. The water is poured into the throat and into the lungs. Fu Naichuan felt that he wanted to struggle desperately, but his body fell sullenly without any improvement, fell into darkness, and fell into hell. He stretched out his hand, trying to grab his mother's hand and the light on the river, but as if his soul had shed its shell, he slowly walked towards the light on the water that no matter how much he stretched out his hand, he couldn't catch it. Ascension went. Suddenly, for a moment, he felt reassured that he couldn't hear anything or grasp anything, and gradually gave up the struggle.
So be it.
Fu Naichuan chased a wild cat into an empty yard. That feral cat has a bunch of kittens in this yard. Fu Naichuan's gloomy complexion finally recovered, and he used his bell to play with the kittens. After a while, the feral cat disappeared with the kittens. Fu Naichuan stayed where he was for a while, and stood up slowly.
He just took a few steps forward when he suddenly heard a sound from behind him.
Immediately he turned his head to look. I saw a group of people wearing silver striped blue clothes holding swords and falling behind him, looking bad. Fu Naichuan curled his lips impatiently, and said, "I think I've been very good recently. Where did I provoke you and ask you to surround me?"
One person said angrily: "Fu Naichuan! You burned Huanlingxi on fire a few days ago. Could it be that you forgot?!!"
Fu Naichuan really forgot that he was inexplicably charged with such a crime some time ago. He nodded quickly and said, "Oh, oh, I'm sorry, I really forgot. So what's the matter with your Siyin Pavilion when Huanlingxi is burned?"
"'The wicked are punished together', which is one of the common ideas of hundreds of schools. We came to crusade you, not only to complain about Huanlingxi's injustice, but also to make you feel guilty for the various crimes you have committed against our family over the years. Evil deeds, blood for blood!"
Fu Naichuan sighed and said, "Okay, what you said makes sense, then I'll accompany you for a while."
After saying that, he was caught off guard and made his move first. I saw him suddenly smile, flick his sleeves, and countless black beads flew out, "bang bang bang" exploded on the ground. Fu Naichuan turned around and wanted to run, but suddenly felt a chill in the back of his head. As soon as he stood firm, several swords slashed in unison. Fu Naichuan subconsciously blocked his arm and suffered from pain, but pretended to be okay and rolled away. One person shouted: "Didn't I hear that your swordsmanship is very good! Why don't you dare to use a sword?!!"
Fu Naichuan chuckled and said, "To deal with you guys, can you still use my sword?"
Hearing his arrogant attitude, everyone turned cold and attacked in unison. Fu Naichuan suddenly shook out a row of rune paper from his sleeve, quickly drew runes using blood as a medium, clapped his hands and drank, "Get out!"
I saw a gust of wind suddenly blowing up from the ground. The talismans vibrated violently, and the runes painted with blood gave off red lights, as if a force was struggling in the thin talisman paper. Suddenly, countless ghosts struggled and emerged from the talisman paper, and they bit the crowd. go up!
In the panic, several people immediately put out the talisman paper, using the spirit sword as a medium, and said: "Destroy!"
After speaking, a powerful sword wind swept across. The sword wind was like a raging rain, but those ghosts were fierce and unusual. Fu Naichuan bit his finger again and drew on the talisman paper for a while. The blood slowly faded as soon as he drew it. Those ghosts were actually fed with blood to keep attacking!
The group of ghosts could only maintain their strength for a short period of time. After a while of fighting, they retracted into the talisman paper, and the talisman paper fell down weakly. Fu Naichuan took a step back, grabbed the talisman paper with his right hand and stuffed it into his sleeve, and put his left hand on the buried soul, but he hesitated for a while, and finally there was no sex.
The crowd gathered together. Fu Naichuan suddenly raised his head and chuckled. Everyone immediately stopped vigilantly and said, "...What else is he going to do???"
Fu Naichuan calmly said: "I just started a few moves, and I have almost figured out your skills, which are still a little weaker than I thought. I didn't expect the Xuan family to grow in arrogance after so many years, but the ability is still the same. No progress."
Everyone's faces turned gloomy. Fu Naichuan continued to say leisurely: "Now I won't hold back any more. Use whatever tricks you have. The more powerful the better, otherwise, I won't be merciful to leave you whole corpses."
Everyone looked at each other in dismay, and they were a little scared and no longer dared to go forward. Fu Naichuan didn't bring many things with him this time. He quietly took a step back, and was about to run away while they were hesitating, when a sedan chair suddenly came over.
The red sedan chair came majestically, the curtains swayed, and the cathode was very strange, making people shudder.
The moment Fu Naichuan saw the red sedan chair, his smile gradually solidified. It was as if some image came up suddenly, his face became distorted, his breathing became rapid, his hands were shaking a little, and he was sweating profusely. I tried to hold myself in place, but my legs subconsciously couldn't stop trying to escape.
The curtain was lifted. A man dressed in silver-striped blue clothes and wearing black tight boots sat slantingly in the sedan chair. His long silver hair was loosely loose, and the black headband was loosely tied. He opened his eyes lazily and looked here, yawning.
Seeing him coming, the rest of the people were also stunned and said, "Home... the head of the family!"
Hyun Mandrill.