Tang Junhe lay on his bed, eyes wide open, looking at everything in the dark room.
He didn't dare to close his eyes, as soon as he closed his eyes, the words Yang Xuan just said and his expression when he said those words would appear in his mind.
A sharp chill slowly crawled up his back.
—What did Yang Xuan mean by what he said just now? Could it be that his mother's death had something to do with Tang Xiaonian
He only heard Yang Chengchuan briefly say that Yang Xuan's mother died of breast cancer, but he never thought that this matter would have anything to do with Tang Xiaonian...
Although Tang Xiaonian always repeated in front of him that it was Yang Xuan and Yang Xuan's mother who robbed them of everything they originally deserved, but in his opinion, Tang Xiaonian never had the opportunity to take it all back idea. Otherwise, when he heard the news that Tang Xiaonian was going to marry Yang Chengchuan, he wouldn't have had such a big reaction.
In his opinion, the biggest stain on Tang Xiaonian is that he shouldn't have been Yang Chengchuan's mistress back then... This stain cannot be washed away no matter what, even as Tang Xiaonian's son who has been raised so hard, Tang Junhe I also have to admit that during a certain period of time, he secretly blamed Tang Xiaonian more than once.
Tang Xiaonian has never told the story of her and Yang Chengchuan in front of him, and he has never had the slightest interest in it—an experience of intervening in other people's feelings, it would not be such a moving story.
It was a relationship that shouldn't have happened, and he was also a child who shouldn't have descended into this world. Tang Junhe opened his eyes in the dark and thought, no one was happy for his birth, maybe even his mother Tang Xiaonian felt it at the time. He is a big problem.
He might be doomed to be pestered by people like Zhou Lin since he was born.
He sighed silently, when will he leave here completely...
In this mood of self-loathing, he unknowingly fell into a deep dream.
He went back to the side wall of the bar. Zhou Lin pinched his wrist to push him against the wall. He tried to break free, but found that Zhou Lin's strength was so amazing that he couldn't move at all.
Those disgusting hands were touching him, reaching under the school uniform, along his waist, and touching his back. He felt something hard on his lower body pressing against him, and tried to turn his body to avoid it, but the man on his body fixed him tightly with his legs.
"Don't touch me..." He tried his best to break free from the man, but nothing worked, and a burst of despair surged in his heart.
The man held him firmly in his arms, pinching his jaw and forcing him to turn his face away. He turned his head to refuse, but he still smelled the warm breath on his face—the faint smell of tobacco, which was completely different from the disgusting smell of alcohol, and the pair of hands caressing his back On his hands, there are slightly rough calluses...
His strength to break free gradually weakened, and the man turned his chin to face him. When he turned his face, he found that the person pressing on him was not Zhou Lin—it was Yang Xuan!
Tang Junhe opened his eyes in extreme shock. He breathed rapidly into the darkness in front of him, his chest heaving violently.
It turned out to be a dream... He feebly let go of his grip on the bed sheet. The quilt on his body had already been kicked under the bed by him in the struggle just now, but a layer of cold sweat broke out on his body.
He sat up from the bed and wanted to get out of bed to pick up the quilt, but after a slight movement, he suddenly found something wrong with his lower body - half hard, wet...
Is it the wet dream mentioned in the hygiene class? Tang Junhe looked at his lower body, thinking blankly. He didn't dare to move anymore, as long as he moved, his lower body could feel the slippery and moist liquid just secreted from his underwear.
Since when did you get an erection? When you smell that tobacco smell? Or when you feel those callused palms? Or when I saw that face...
With long and neat thick eyebrows, slightly sunken eyes, and a tall and straight bridge of nose, Tang Junhe recalled the dream just now in a daze - the person in the dream seemed to be indeed Yang Xuan...
How could he dream that Yang Xuan tried to violate him? Tang Junhe bit his lip, thinking in panic, how could the disgusting Zhou Lin who tried to violate him become Yang Xuan? To make matters worse, he reacted and had his first wet dream...
According to the physiology book, boys will have nocturnal emission between the ages of 13-15, maybe because of late development, maybe because of Zhou Lin, Tang Junhe has not experienced nocturnal emission for a long time. He only knew that sexual desire was a desire, but he didn't know what kind of desire it was, and he never tried to understand it.
Because of Zhou Lin, he vaguely felt that sexual desire was dirty and invisible, but now, he actually developed sexual desire for Yang Xuan...
That's my half-brother... Tang Junhe thought while clutching his underwear in bewilderment.
Staring blankly at the darkness for a while, he got out of bed, bent down, picked up the quilt and put it on the bed, then turned on the light in the room, went to the closet, found a pair of clean underwear in his hand, and sat back on the bed .
He took off his dirty underwear and looked down—it was already half wet, and the body fluids on it were faintly visible under the light. He unconsciously recalled the feeling just now, it was a wonderful pleasure, mixed with fear and desire, and then spurted out uncontrollably.
Is this what the so-called sexual desire feels like...
After changing into clean underwear, he couldn't sleep anymore.
After calming down, he thought to the dimly lit sky that the dream just now should have been an accident. Zhou Lin's naked desire for him and Yang Xuan's fear of him both happened the night before, and they mixed into a messy scene. The dream made him experience that dirty, invisible desire in the dream.
It was just an accident, he thought clutching the quilt. He wouldn't have a sexual desire for Yang Xuan, otherwise wouldn't he be the same as Zhou Lin
Then he began to fear that Yang Xuan would send that photo to Tang Xiaonian. Back then when he returned his cell phone, he was too hasty and forgot to delete the trace of that text message from Yang Xuan's cell phone. If Yang Xuan wanted to do that, it would be a piece of cake.
He remembered that when he was 10 years old, Tang Xiaonian dragged him to the principal's office like crazy, and asked Zhou Lin what the animal teacher had done to his son.
If no one else had come to hold her back at that time, she might have really pulled out the fruit knife she carried in her bag before she left and stabbed Zhou Lin to death—that scene made him terrified.
He realized that Tang Xiaonian would really fight Zhou Lin for this matter. No one can persuade Tang Xiaonian to be stubborn.
But just as Tang Xiaonian couldn't live without him, he couldn't lose Tang Xiaonian either—it wasn't at all inconsistent with trying to leave her.
Since then, Tang Junhe has never told Tang Xiaonian about Zhou Lin's matter, and kept it a secret for 6 years.
Fortunately, as long as Zhou Lin doesn't drink, he won't try to get close to him. Most of the time, he will just follow him, looking like he wants to get close but doesn't dare to get close—his cautiousness won't let Tang Jun He had a good impression, that seemingly honest and harmless face made Tang Junhe hate it when he thought of it.
All morning, Tang Xiaonian didn't overreact at all. After having a nanny in the family, she even revolved around Tang Junhe in everything, knocking on the door every hour to come in and deliver fruits. By the way, she saw how her son was studying hard, and she didn't forget to persuade him to combine work and rest.
Tang Junhe was so airtight and annoyed by her concern that he almost wanted to close the door and refuse Tang Xiaonian's unannounced entry.
He hated Tang Xiaonian's new job, which made their vacations completely overlap, leaving him no time to breathe.
During lunch, Yang Xuan rarely appeared at the dinner table. This was the first time since Tang Xiaonian and Tang Junhe moved here.
Tang Xiaonian was extremely enthusiastic - she told Tang Junhe more than once that when she was young, she was discovered by scouts on the street and wanted to choose her to act in a movie or to be an actress, but she was pregnant at the time and refused That once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.
If she really went to act in a movie, she might be a good actress. Listening to Tang Xiaonian's fake concern, Tang Junhe couldn't help but think this way.
"Does Xiaoxuan drink soup?" Tang Xiaonian put the small bowl of soup in front of Tang Junhe, looked at Yang Xuan and asked—she knew that Yang Xuan would not care about her, and she didn't want to really give Yang Xuan a bowl of soup .
"Don't give it to him," Yang Chengchuan was always dissatisfied with Yang Xuan, and said with a bad face, "It's not polite at all."
Tang Xiaonian stretched out his hand to tuck the hair that fell on his cheeks behind his ears, and chatted with Yang Chengchuan seemingly casually: "I read Jun He's test paper a few days ago, and the questions in No. 1 Middle School seem to be a little more difficult than those in No. 3 Middle School."
"I can't tell from the grades." Yang Chengchuan mentioned Tang Junhe's grades, his face softened, "Junhe got a full score in the math test last time, and he was the only one in the class. The head teacher even sent a text message to tell me."
"Really, I really didn't know it was the only perfect score," Tang Xiaonian lied without changing his face. In fact, she had asked these things clearly as early as the first time. She changed the subject and cared about Yang Xuan. , "Xiaoxuan did well in the exam, too?"
Yang Chengchuan snorted coldly: "He, he handed in a blank paper, but he didn't know how to do a single question. How capable he is."
Tang Junhe ate with his head depressed, turning a deaf ear to all conversations. Since he moved here, he seldom spoke at the dinner table unless he was asked directly.
He kept his eyes down, afraid of meeting Yang Xuan's eyes inadvertently. Because of the dream last night, when he faced Yang Xuan again, he felt more guilty than fear.
Yang Xuan didn't respond, just tapped the phone screen twice with two fingers, and then held the phone in his hand.
Will he show Tang Xiaonian that photo? Because of his action, Tang Junhe's heart was lifted again.
Tang Xiaonian had met Zhou Lin before, so she wouldn't mistake them for a relationship—but she might stand up on the spot, grab a kitchen knife from the kitchen, and rush out to chop Zhou Lin up.
However, Yang Chengchuan will stop her. Tang Junhe then thought of this, and his heart dropped slightly. Tang Xiaonian doesn't need to do anything by herself now, she only needs to speak a few words to her husband, the deputy mayor, to settle Zhou Lin's matter.
That's fine, Tang Junhe thought, if Yang Xuan really did this, he would be taking the initiative to give up his privileges, and it has nothing to do with him.
However, Yang Xuan seemed to just pick up the phone and reply a message, and then put the phone back on the table. It seems that the action of holding the phone is just to show his impatience.
After lunch, Yang Chengchuan went back to his study, while Tang Junhe and Tang Xiaonian went back to their respective rooms to take a nap.
As soon as he lay down on the bed, Tang Junhe remembered the dream last night - his underwear was still hidden in the drawer and hadn't been washed. He quickly took it out, took advantage of the fact that there was no one in the living room, walked lightly to the bathroom, and locked the door from the inside.
He comforted himself while washing his underwear, just sitting at the dinner table, he didn't have any special feelings for Yang Xuan, let alone desire for him, the dream last night was just an accident.
Yang Xuan is a boy and his biological brother, he will not be the same as Zhou Lin.
He put the foam-filled underwear under the running water to rinse, and heard footsteps in the living room, followed by the sound of the door being pushed and closed. There was a rectangular frosted glass window embedded in the door of the bathroom. He turned his head slightly and recognized Yang Xuan from the blurred figure.
Yang Xuan went out.
Tang Junhe hung the washed underwear on the balcony, opened the bathroom door, and wanted to go back to his room to take a nap. When passing by the living room, he caught a glimpse of the cigarette case and lighter lying quietly on the coffee table.
He remembered the faint smell of tobacco when Yang Xuan was close to him, it smelled very good. He obviously hated the smell related to cigarettes before, but this time it was abnormal. Could it be related to the brand of cigarettes
He walked over and sat on the sofa behind the coffee table, picked up the pack of cigarettes as if he had been bewitched by some kind, and turned over to look at the swashbuckling characters printed on the black cigarette pack.
He didn't know any of the words on the cigarette pack, presumably they weren't in English. He saw that there was half an unsmoked cigarette in the ashtray, and couldn't help reaching out to pick it up, staring at it in a daze.
Is this the cigarette Yang Xuan smoked last night? He picked up the metallic lighter on the side, held it in his hand and studied it twice, then scratched the top cover with his thumb, and turned the roller. The flame suddenly burst out, which made his heart skip a beat, and he quickly let go of it.
Gathering his mind, he held the half-remained cigarette butt in his right hand, and the lighter in his left hand, and lit it again. He brought the cigarette close to the jumping flame and lit it. Small golden sparks appeared on the charred butt, and then a thin wisp of white smoke emerged.
Is this the smell? It doesn't seem to be... He stared at the cigarette butt, took a deep breath of the smell of smoke in the air, and concentrated on analyzing it.
At this moment, the door behind him suddenly opened, his hand shook, and he turned his head to look over.
— It’s Yang Xuan.
Yang Xuan came up to get cigarettes. When he walked downstairs just now, he felt a little bored and couldn't help but want to smoke a cigarette. He touched his empty pocket and realized that he had forgotten the cigarette case. When he was changing his shoes just before leaving, he put the cigarette case on the coffee table for the time being. He was absent-minded when he left and forgot to pick it up.
He turned and went upstairs, and looked at the tea table as soon as he opened the door. Then he accidentally saw his half-brother, who was holding the remaining half of his cigarette, staring at him in a daze.
Want to learn to smoke? Yang Xuan wanted to laugh a bit—his mother, who surrounded him all day, would allow him to smoke
Perhaps because he didn't expect that his behavior would be caught straight, Tang Junhe looked at him with some embarrassment.
Yang Xuan walked over, picked up the cigarette case on the table, looked at him and smiled, and said in a low voice, "Good student, don't let your mother down."
Tang Junhe still maintained the original posture, holding the lighter in his left hand, and pinching the half-smoked cigarette butt in his right hand. The sparks burned upwards at a steady pace, burning out a long length of soot.
Yang Xuan spread his palm towards him: "Lighter."
"Oh." Tang Junhe reacted, and immediately put the lighter in his palm, then quickly withdrew his hand, and swallowed his throat.
Yang Xuan looked at him, smiled again, and walked out with a lighter and a cigarette case.
The door was closed, and the ash fell down suddenly as if feeling the vibration, and landed on Tang Junhe's fingertips, causing him to shrink his hand a little.
He quickly regained his senses, put the half of the cigarette in the ashtray and extinguished it, then took out a tissue to wipe the tea table clean, and hurried back to his room.