From the shady classroom to the sunny corridor, Tang Junhe approached Yang Xuan step by step, feeling like he was dreaming. The sunlight came in obliquely, even if he walked in front of Yang Xuan, he was not completely covered by his brother's shadow.
Yang Xuan moved his fingers, pinched the corner of the red-brown notebook and handed it to Tang Junhe: "It's done." Maybe it was because he was about to leave Runcheng, his figure looked a little laid-back, his tone of voice Also looks lazy.
Tang Junhe took it, bowed his head and opened the passport, looking at his own photo on it, and the English words following the Chinese.
There is a delicate and beautiful young man printed on the plain white background. Tang Junhe looks exactly like the one in the photo when he was young. At first glance, he looks innocent and calm, but if you look carefully, you will find those big black eyes It clearly filled his heart's emotions, including curiosity and desire for the unknown, as well as powerlessness and resistance to the status quo.
"Keep it well," Yang Xuan looked down at him, exhorting him like a competent brother, "It will be needed in the future."
Tang Junhe wanted to cry a little, he realized that Yang Xuan had come to say goodbye to him—Yang Xuan was leaving, and now he no longer said those words that would take him away. However, he still held back his tears, he was used to stuffing them in his eyes reflexively the moment the tears welled up.
He swallowed his throat, looked up at Yang Xuan and asked, "When are you leaving, brother?"
"Tomorrow," Yang Xuan said with a smile, "same time as last time."
"So fast."
"I can't stay any longer." Yang Xuan didn't evade his reason for leaving early.
So what should I do? What shall we do? Tang Junhe wanted to ask this question, but at the moment when he was about to blurt it out, he realized that he had already asked this question. "I can take you away." He still remembered the answer Yang Xuan gave.
"I just have time, so I can take you out for dinner." Yang Xuan raised his hand and rubbed his hair, "Shall we go?"
Tang Junhe said, "Yes."
Yang Xuan's hand fell from the top of his head and wrapped his arms around his shoulders, leading him towards the stairs: "What do you want to eat?"
Tang Junhe had no appetite, he said, whatever.
They were holding hands on the street, but when Tang Junhe realized this, he no longer remembered who took the initiative to hold whom. Yang Xuan took him straight into a Japanese grocery store, and he pushed the menu to Tang Junhe opposite, and ordered a ramen himself.
"I'm the same as you." Tang Junhe didn't open the menu to read.
Yang Xuan turned the menu in front of him, opened it and flipped to the back, ordered some snacks and two drinks.
Tang Junhe felt that he had a lot to say, such as asking what the relationship between them was, asking whether Yang Xuan had ever liked him, asking whether he took him away out of tease or for real, and Will he wait for himself, but these questions seem so out of place in this "Last Lunch".
Questions swirled around my mouth and swallowed, and the last question I asked was not much better than the others: "Brother, will you really come back next summer?"
Yang Xuan said ambiguously, "Probably."
It took a while for Tang Junhe to say: "It would be nice if it was always summer here."
Yang Xuan smiled and said, "That's tropical."
The steaming hot noodle soup was placed in front of him, and it smelled tangy, Tang Junhe picked up a few chopsticks and put them down again, he raised his head and looked at Yang Xuan, who was confused in front of him: "Brother, will you blame me? "
He asked nonchalantly, but Yang Xuan understood. "Everyone has a choice they have to make," Yang Xuan said flatly, "Let's eat."
Tang Junhe fell into a state of confusion again, the teacher's voice on the podium was wafting in his ears, but he couldn't hear a word. The myriad of thoughts are like a huge vortex, drawing him into it, tearing him apart frantically and cruelly, he wants to escape from the vortex, but the more he struggles, the deeper he sinks, the water vapor rushing from the vortex pours into his face. His ears, eyes, nose and mouth were all pervasive, making him suffocate.
At night, Tang Xiaonian came to his room again. Her mental state was much better than the previous few days. In front of Tang Junhe, she did not hide her thoughts at all: "You know that Yang Xuan is leaving tomorrow, right?"
Tang Junhe's eyes fell on the book, but he didn't put a word into his mind.
"I'm talking to you," Tang Xiaonian reached out and rubbed Tang Junhe's hair, "What's wrong with you, you look so bad."
"I want to see him off tomorrow." Tang Junhe said.
"Where's his plane at two o'clock in the afternoon? You're still in class, how can you have time?" Tang Xiaonian categorically disagreed, "Besides, Yang Chengchuan will go see him off. What's the use of you going? You can drive or you can luggage?"
Tang Junhe whispered: "He is my brother."
Tang Xiaonian gave him a white look: "He's your kind of brother, I'm just your child, you don't have a brother."
"Mom," Tang Junhe buried his head very low, and the ends of his hair fell to the textbook, "What if I go abroad too?"
"What country did you go to?" Tang Xiaonian took his words as imagination, "Aren't you going to take the re-examination for self-enrollment the day after tomorrow? How are you preparing?"
"Not very good," Tang Junhe's broken hair made a "chacha" sound on the book, "I don't want to take the retest."
Tang Xiaonian was startled: "Crazy, if you don't take the retest, you're going to beg for food on the street?" She put her hand on Tang Junhe's head and asked him to raise his head, "Are you studying or dozing off? "
Tang Junhe raised his head and looked at a certain direction in front of him without focus: "Mom, I want to ask you a question."
"what?"
"Will you divorce for me?"
"I married this marriage just for you!" Tang Xiaonian said unhappily, "Whether it's divorced or not, what do children know, and they want to assign me every day. Tell you, you don't want to call Yang Chengchuan Dad , and don’t take his surname, let him hear you talking about divorce every day, be careful that he doesn’t recognize your son.”
"I don't have a father." Tang Junhe said with blank eyes.
"You don't have a father, but you do have a brother. That's fine, let's study quickly." Tang Xiaonian said, walked out of Tang Junhe's room, and closed the door from the outside.
As soon as she left, Tang Junhe's upper body fell down, his forehead rested on the desk, and he muttered to himself in pain: "Since you can marry me, why can't you divorce me..."
Tang Xiaonian came out of Tang Junhe's room, but she didn't go back to sleep immediately. Ever since she learned about Tang Junhe's initial test results, Tang Xiaonian delayed her bedtime at night. Originally, she would lie in bed at ten o'clock, but now, she must watch Tang Junhe wash up and go to sleep. I was willing to go back to the house to sleep.
Lying on the bed, Tang Junhe took out the passport Yang Xuan gave him in the dark. He pressed the small notebook to his chest, lay down on the bed, closed his eyes in pain, and his eyelashes trembled uncontrollably.
Tang Junhe couldn't sleep, the night was dark, he got up from the bed, and walked to the door of Yang Xuan's room barefoot. But this time he neither knocked nor scratched the door, he just stood quietly at the door of that door.
He was already very familiar with this room, and when he walked in, he could see the large floor-to-ceiling windows. If the weather was fine, they would lie on the carpet and see the boundless starry sky outside the window. It was obviously just a room, but to him, it seemed like a vast world. All his freedom and indulgence in this house came from this room, and now Yang Xuan is leaving, bringing with him the freedom and indulgence he once gave him.
Tang Junhe recalled the days before he came to this house. There was nothing wrong with that dilapidated old house, and there was nothing wrong with the creaking iron gate. Everything there was fine, but it was too boring. Black and white tones, stereotyped days, it is too boring.
Tang Junhe stood at the door for an unknown how long, then walked back to his room silently with his head down.
Chen Xing drove over to pick up Tang Junhe to go to school. From the moment Tang Junhe walked out of the corridor, he felt that something was wrong with him. His face was pale, and he staggered when he walked. At first glance, he looked like a paper man who had lost his body, and he would fall over if he touched it slightly.
"Are you feeling unwell?" Chen Xing asked kindly.
Tang Junhe's head rested against the window on one side, and he shook it weakly twice.
"Your brother is leaving this afternoon. Do you want to go see him off?" Chen Xing knew that he was always clinging to Yang Xuan. "If you go, I'll go around the school and pick you up in the afternoon."
"Thank you, Uncle Chen," Tang Junhe finally spoke, "What time is it?"
"About 1 o'clock."
Tang Junhe said, "Yes." Although he knew that Yang Chengchuan would not allow Chen Xing to come and pick him up, he still had a glimmer of hope.
When the car arrived at the school, Chen Xing parked the car at the school gate and reminded him, "Remember to ask the teacher for leave in advance."
Tang Junhe walked towards the classroom with his schoolbag on his back, and sat down on his seat. He put the schoolbag into the table hole, and Yin Cong came over to see him: "At the same table, are you sick again?"
Tang Junhe shook his head, and said after a while: "My brother is leaving."
"Ah?" Yin Cong realized that he was talking about Yang Xuan, "Today?"
Tang Junhe said, "Yes."
"It's so fast," Yin Cong said with some regret, "If you think about it this way, you may never see Yang Xuan again in your life."
When Tang Junhe heard this, he suddenly turned his head to look at her: "He will come back."
"Ah? Oh... you guys are brothers, you will meet again when he comes back, but we are just classmates, of course we are also friends, but think about it, if we don't make a special appointment in the future, we may never see each other again Come on... Speaking of which, you will only see each other once or twice a year in the future, right?"
As soon as her words came out, Tang Junhe suddenly broke free from his dazed state. If we meet once a year, can we only see ten times in ten years? How long a year must be... What if Yang Xuan doesn't come back during this year? What if the future Yang Xuan never comes back? Once he left Runcheng, would he still want to come back? This run city is full of Yang Chengchuan's shadow, once he escapes, no one will want to come back. Next summer may never come.
"Probably." Yang Xuan said so yesterday.
Maybe what he really wanted to say was "Probably won't come back".
"Hey, my deskmate, what are you thinking?" Seeing his dazed expression, Yin Cong nudged him with his elbow.
Tang Junhe suddenly looked flustered, stood up abruptly, raised his legs and walked towards the door of the classroom.
"Hey—" Yin Cong just wanted to say something when the chemistry teacher walked in from the door.
"What are you going to do?" Seeing Tang Junhe walking out in a hurry, the chemistry teacher turned to look at him and asked. Unexpectedly, Tang Junhe walked out without stopping, as if he had never heard of it.
The chemistry teacher thought he was going to the bathroom, so he entered the classroom without asking.
Tang Junhe ran to the school gate quickly, and the lower grade students who came late were still walking into the campus one after another with their schoolbags on their backs. He passed through the crowd retrogradely, and many students turned their heads to look at his hasty figure, but he didn't care about anything. No, he ran out of the school gate all the way to the side of the road.
A taxi that had just delivered students honked at him, and then stopped in front of him. The driver stretched out his head and shouted at him, "Let's go?"
At eight o'clock in the morning, when everyone was walking out of the house, Tang Junhe ran back home in a hurry. All the people passing by looked back at him in surprise, but he just ran in a hurry, not daring to stop.
He ran up the stairs, ran to the door of the house, took out the key and opened the door.
Both Yang Chengchuan and Tang Xiaonian had gone to work, and the house was empty. Yang Xuan just took a shower, and was about to open the bathroom door and come out.
Their eyes collided, and Yang Xuan was taken aback.
"Brother, you," Tang Junhe's throat became dry from running, he swallowed jerkyly, trying to calm his heaving chest, "Are you still willing to take me away?"