It was him who made such a lovely girl so sad.
It was him who once again hurt a person who truly loved him.
(one)
In a French-style restaurant with flashing lights, a beautiful woman in a red evening dress sat quietly with her head bowed. She had been sitting for a long time, and the waiter came to ask three times if the food was served. She kept shaking her head and said softly: " Wait a while."
The lovers in the restaurant had already paid their bills and left. One table after another, in the flickering candlelight, the figure of the woman looked so lonely.
The waiter came to ask again, this time, she nodded slightly and said, "Open the red wine for me."
The waiter opened the red wine, filled a glass for her, and just took a sip, one sip, another sip, and it didn't take long for the bottle of red wine to run out.
Shan Shan stood up, checked out and walked out of the restaurant, walking along the road, wearing high heels and dragging a long skirt, in the pedestrian street with bright street lights and people coming and going.
Suddenly, she stopped the script, looked around, tears welled up in her eyes, picked up the phone, dialed the number that she was so familiar with, and it took a long time before she answered.
Shan Shan raised his head, looked at the sky, and said a little dizzily, "Tang Xiaotian, come out, I want to see you."
"Have you been drinking?" Tang Xiaotian on the phone heard the abnormality in her voice.
"Do you care about me too?" Shan Shan asked back here: "Didn't you hide from me as if you were seeing the plague? Didn't you even refuse to have a meal with me! You fucking care Do I drink or not!"
"Tang Xiaotian, let me tell you, I want to see you now, right away! Come out!" Just looking at him on the phone, he was already a little hysterical.
"You wait for me, don't wander around." After Tang Xiaotian finished speaking, he hung up the phone.
Just hung up the phone, regardless of the price of the dress on her body, she sat down on the flowerbed by the side of the road, staring at the road, in a daze, thinking about what she had done all these years, but she couldn't remember, what I can't even remember, in my memory, there seems to be nothing except chasing Tang Xiaotian.
There were fewer and fewer people on the street. After waiting for Shan Dan for half an hour, Tang Xiaocai rushed over from the end of the street, stood in front of Shan Dan, pulled Shan Shan nervously and said, "I'll take you back."
Shan Shan shook off his hand, raised his eyes, looked at him dimly and said, "Tang Xiaotian, do you remember where this is?"
Tang Xiaotian looked around, but didn't think of it. Shan Shan smiled bitterly, and said softly: "Only I remember, that year, I was tricked by Shan Yi'an back from the United States, with no relatives, no reason, and nowhere to go. It was you who took me home from here."
"It was only then that I realized that I had fallen in love with you in the United States." Shan Shan lowered his head, his voice was very soft: "I like you, do you know? The whole world knows it, and you know it too .”
"Tang Xiaotian, it's been ten years. I've followed you and chased you for ten years. You must not know how confident I was at the beginning. I was so stupid at that time. I just didn't believe it. I didn't believe that I couldn't beat the time." , I can't beat you!"
"I always feel that I am still young, and I can afford it! No matter ten years or twenty years, if I fight with you, I just won't admit defeat." Shan Shan raised his head, stood up slowly, his eyes filled with tears : "But, Xiaotian, I was wrong, I was really wrong! I only know now that even if I use it for ten years, I can't impress you!"
Shan Shan raised his hands and turned around slowly: "Tang Xiaotian, I want to admit my mistake to you at the place where I started: I was wrong, starting today, I admit defeat, I give up, and I will never pester you again." I'm following you."
"In this way, you can be happier." After Shan Shan finished speaking, he turned around and walked forward step by step. Tang Xiaotian followed, grabbed her wrist and said, "I'll take you back."
"Don't worry about it, go away!" Shan Shan shook off his hand.
"Single." Tang Xiaotian didn't let go, took her hand in pain and said, "I keep rejecting you because I don't want you to become like this! I just don't want you to be as sad as you are now!"
"Yes, I'm stupid, I'm stupid!" Shan Shan cried, "I never knew that the order of appearance in life is so important. I just arrived later than her, so I will never have a chance. If there is a next life, I must beat you." Born early, I will block the door of your house, so that you will never meet Shu Yawang in your life!"
"Shan Shan." Tang Xiaotian frowned, feeling very sad.
"Let go." Shan Shan lowered his head, stretched out his hand to break Tang Xiaotian's hand off his wrist, and said weakly: "Since you will never accept me in your life, then leave me alone. People like me are too cheap. If I get better, I will be reluctant to leave."
Tang Xiaotian struggled for a while, then let go of his hand slowly,
Shan Shan was silent for a while, raised his hand, and took off the pearl earrings that he had carefully put on today from his ears, then took out the ceramic figurine he gave in the United States from his bag, handed it to Tang Xiaotian and said, "I'll give you back these , I don’t want to look at the earrings every morning and guess foolishly, you once had a heart for me, I don’t want to hold this cold ceramic villain every night, thinking that you once said that I am like an angel.”
"These years, I've had enough of thinking about it, and I'm tired of thinking about it." Shan Shan said softly: "Tang Xiaotian, I don't want to fantasize anymore."
After speaking, she stuffed the thing into Tang Xiaotian's hand, then bit her lip, turned and left.
This time, she really decided to give up, really.
Tang Xiaotian didn't speak. Looking at her stubborn and slender back, he suddenly felt a heartache. He really wanted to rush up and hug her, and then...
Then tell her what
Thinking blankly, Tang Xiaotian followed Shan Shan from a distance, and saw her walking staggeringly. After walking for a while, she suddenly sprained her foot and fell to the ground. Tang Xiaotian hurried forward, wanting to help her, but remembered What she said just now, she slowly withdrew her hand.
Shan Shan prostrated on the ground and sat up slowly. Her bare arm fell through a hole. She touched it. She picked up the mobile phone, sat on the ground, and called someone. After the call was connected, she used a pitiful The voice said: "Shan Yi'an, Shan Yi'an! I can't find my way home, come and pick me up."
"Come and pick me up, come and pick me up and go home." She started crying as she spoke, Tang Xiaotian was behind her, looking at her very sadly.
It was him who made such a lovely girl so sad.
It was him who once again hurt a person who truly loved him.
If it is said that not being able to give Shu Ya hope of happiness is the greatest pain in his life, then making me feel so sad is the most guilty thing in my life...
He shouldn't have given her hope then, he should have rejected it more thoroughly.
But at that time, in the name of being weak, he relied on her liking, let her chase, and even asked her to save him.
That silly girl really came, ignorant and fearless, she passed through the thorns, stepped on the mud, and rushed to him all the way, but she failed to pull him out of the mud, and was covered in mud and scarred by him .
They were like this, one sitting on the side of the road crying, the other standing in the dark, protecting her from afar.
When her tears fell one after another, when she was crying and calling, his heart was also sore.
(two)
When Shan Yi'an received the call, the company was holding a high-level meeting to arrange an important acquisition plan for tomorrow. After more than half a year of planning, it finally made people wait until the moment of closing the network. He was in a good mood today, sitting in the conference room triumphantly, listening to his right-hand assistant Li Chuyao report the progress of the project. There were not many people attending the conference. There were seven or eight men in suits and leather shoes sitting in the conference room. Everyone's expressions are quite excited. After all, after tomorrow, the company will be improved again, and their share dividends at the end of the year can be doubled again.
When the phone was turned on, Shan Yian looked down, and Shan Shan's name appeared on the phone. Without hesitation, Shan Yian got up and picked up the phone, walked out of the meeting room to answer the call, everyone in the meeting room was a little surprised Looking at him, this young chairman took over at the age of twenty. It has been nearly ten years now, and this is the first time he ran out to answer the phone during a meeting.
Several high-level executives looked at each other. Although they were silent, their eyes communicated with each other and guessed. The only person who was not surprised was Li Chuyao, the chief executive secretary. Recite all the content and data on the project file.
When Shan Yi'an pushed the door open again and came in, his expression was very bad, his handsome face was full of anxious expression which was rarely seen: "Li Chuyao, come with me."
After speaking, he left an employee in the conference room and rushed away. Everyone looked at me and looked at you. I didn't know what was going on, but no one dared to leave, because he didn't say the word to dismiss the meeting just now.
The elevator descended at a constant speed, and soon arrived at the underground parking lot. Shan Yian opened the door and sat in the driver's seat. Li Chuyao sat on the side. While driving, he instructed her to prepare for tomorrow's acquisition, which should have been It was arranged at the meeting, but now, he can only instruct the secretary first, and then let her pass it on.
Li Chuyao turned on the laptop and entered all the tasks he had assigned. Soon, the car had already driven to the city center. Shan Yian stopped to give orders, and looked around the road. After two or three minutes, he was in a Under the streetlight at the corner, I saw the familiar figure sitting on the ground leaning against the newsstand, under the dim light, with his head down, his long hair hanging down, covering his cheeks.
Shan Yi'an hurriedly pulled over and parked the car, opened the car door without even turning off the ignition, and ran over with big strides: "Shan Shan."
Hearing his voice, the man raised his head slowly. Shan Yi'an's beautiful face, which was always invincible, actually showed a hint of distress. He squatted down slowly, and put his hand on her shoulder. He said in a gentle voice, "little sister, go home with brother."
When Shan Shan, who had been waiting on the side of the road for a long time, heard this sentence, he held his lips in grievance, and couldn't help crying loudly anymore.
"Okay, stop crying." Shan Yi'an stretched out his hands, trying to pull her up, but Shan Shan suddenly beat his chest with both hands, crying and said, "Shan Yi'an, why didn't you pick me up sooner?" Go home! You clearly knew that I was your own sister, so you didn’t pick me up early! You let me go because of someone else’s kindness! Because someone invited me to a hot pot meal and went to an amusement park with me! Because someone else Love me like a brother! I lost my heart!"
"Shan Yi'an! It's all your fault! Why didn't you pick me up earlier, why couldn't you pick me up earlier! I've really had a hard time, I'm really tired!"
Shan Shan was talking, crying on his chest, Shan Yi'an frowned, hugged her who was cold all over in distress, and coaxed in a low voice: "I'm sorry, I will take you home now."
Shan Shan pulled the clothes on his chest, sobbing and crying, Shan Yi'an half-supported and half-carried her to the side of the car, Li Chuyao indifferently opened the rear door for them, Shan Yi'an helped Shan Shan in, and After sitting in the car, Li Chuyao closed the door, walked around to the driver's seat, and started the car.
The car whizzed by on the road, and a man slowly walked out of the shadow not far from the road, looking at the direction where the car disappeared with painful eyes.
The whole journey was silent, the lights outside the car were brightly lit, and the inside of the car was pitch black. Shan Shan's alcohol was already on the rise, and she had been crying for too long just now, she had already fallen asleep leaning on Shan Yi'an's shoulder, and Shan Yi'an raised his hand to gently stroke Her soft hair, he lowered his eyes, and suddenly said softly: "When I was young, I hated her very much, so much that I wished she would die."
Not surprisingly, the person in the driver's seat didn't make a sound at all, which is why Shan Yi'an likes to bring her by his side. This woman is calm and intelligent, taciturn and capable, just like a robot. You and her When she said anything, she didn't seem to respond, nor did she seem to hear, let alone tell anyone.
Talking to her made him feel safe.
Shan Yi'an half hugged Shan Dan, patted her on the shoulder every now and then, like coaxing her sister to sleep when she was a child, gently coaxing her to sleep.
Shan Yi'an lowered his head, looked at the girl who was only half blood with him, and continued: "But she is as old as my sister, and like my sister, she lives so helpless, so painful, and so eager for family affection and love."
"But it's the same as my sister. I didn't get anything. Back then, I took revenge on everyone who hurt me, but I couldn't take revenge on her."
Shan Yi'an took Shan Dan's white hand and held it tightly: "Because she is like me, like my sister, we have all tasted the pain she has suffered, and we have all longed for what she desires."
"So sometimes I feel that letting go of her is like letting go of myself." When Shan Yi'an said this, he was always calm and gentle. Tonight, he seemed to be stimulated by Shan Shan's tearful accusation He was a little sentimental and said a lot of nonsense, but fortunately, the person who listened to his nonsense didn't respond at all.
(three)
In the middle of the night, Tang Xiaotian came to a place called Xinghua Park alone. Over the years, he often came here to see the flowers, trees, pavilions, and lakes here.
Every time he came here and closed his eyes, he seemed to be able to clearly remember every word that girl whispered in his ear.
It's been ten years, just like I said, she hasn't been able to impress him in ten years, and he hasn't been able to forget the other person in ten years.
Ten years seems to be just a flick of a finger, and ten years seems to be endless.
During these ten years of silence, there seemed to be no voice beside him except Shan Shan, but today, that voice also announced to him that she was leaving.
I thought I would be a little more relaxed, but suddenly felt quiet and scary.
Tang Xiaotian walked slowly in Xinghua Park, stopped at the edge of an octagonal pavilion, looked up at the pavilion, and wrote "Xiayouqiaomu Yawang Paradise" in black cursive on the plaque, which has not moved for a long time.
Every time I see this plaque, I think of what Shu Yawang once said with a blushing smile in his ear: Heaven is where you are.
Every time he thinks of this, his heart still throbs.
But every time, because of this inscription, he would instantly think of Xia Mu, the real owner of this park.
Tang Xiaotian walked into the gazebo, closed his eyes gently, and the events of these years kept flashing through his mind, everything, everything, played back in his mind like a movie, about Xia Mu, about Shu Yawang, and Yes, about Qu Weiran, those people have disappeared from his life for ten years, but everything still seems to happen yesterday, his time seems to have stopped with the departure of those people, and his The people around me are getting old and growing up day by day.
My father has retired from the army, and every day he takes the birdcage to the river to play chess with people, arguing endlessly with people over a chess piece.
My mother's hair is already gray, and she still goes out to buy vegetables on time every day, but every time she sees an old lady passing by her with her grandchildren in her arms, she always walks around the road with joy and envy.
Zhang Jingyu's son was already in elementary school, and his mischief made him worry about it every day. When he was drinking, he seemed to have nothing else to talk about except his son.
The girl with the doll head and big eyes has long lost her youthful vigor, and the color of her clothes has gradually changed from pink to simple and elegant, and her bright smile has also softened, and she stomps her feet and pouts when she loses her temper It's been a long time since I saw such a small move.
They're all changing and he's not, they're all moving forward and he's not.
He has been standing still, not moving a step.
He clearly remembered that on the day of Xia Mu's funeral, he said to Shu Yawang, "I won't wait for you."
However, he didn't do it. Oh, it can't be said that he didn't do it, it's just that he didn't have a place he wanted to go, so he stayed where he was, in this park.
Tang Xiaotian thought of Dan Dan again, that girl, who cried so sadly tonight, made his heart ache. In fact, he really wanted to cry a lot, and then imitate her and let go of a relationship that he couldn't ask for.
But he couldn't do it. The most painful days have long passed. Now he is just a frog boiled in warm water. I feel that he has not breathed freely for many years, and he always feels dull, pressed on his chest, unable to cry out, unable to press down.
Tang Xiaotian took a deep breath, and then let it out, looking at the earrings and the little angel in his hand, thinking of what she said when she returned these to him, did she think about him every night and every morning? ? Thinking about her and his possibilities
In fact, it would be a lie to say that he hadn't thought about it. How many times, when his colleagues persuaded him, when his mother scolded him angrily, when his father hinted at something while drinking, and when he watched others procrastinate at a class reunion, he thought about it, forget it , Just like this, let's be with her, such a good girl, a girl who loves him so much, what is he not satisfied with
But every time, there is another voice in his mind asking him: If you are with her, you must love her wholeheartedly, take care of her, and prevent her from being hurt in the slightest. The first thing you have to do is to completely forget about other things. Can you do it alone
Every time, the voice he answered in his heart was negative.
But today, that negative voice seemed to be no longer firm, and another voice was clamoring for him, asking him anxiously, why not try? Try to forget her, try to be a fickle, forgetful man, try to accept, a girl who has loved you for so long...
Tang Xiaotian sat quietly all night with his eyes open in the dark gazebo, but under this quiet expression, he was fighting fiercely in his heart.
I don't know how long it took, the sky was bright, the birds were chirping on the branches, there were more people doing morning exercises in the park, and groups of old men and women were doing Tai Chi. A couple came with a baby. The baby seemed to be only about 1 year old and could not walk yet. The baby's father bent over and held his hand, walking forward step by step. The baby was very excited and laughed. , the mother of the baby walked to the front quickly, holding the mobile phone and calling softly to the father and son: "Baby, look here, look at mom, look at mom."
The little baby stuck out his tongue and looked at his mother hard, and the baby's father also made faces at the camera. The baby's mother laughed loudly and snapped a picture of this moment.
Tang Xiaotian watched this scene quietly, and the morning light shone softly on his haggard side face. He lowered his eyes and thought for a while, then stood up slowly, as if he had made a very important decision.
(Four)
In the morning, Shan Shan woke up with a splitting headache, opened her eyes, still felt that the world was turning again, her throat was so thirsty, she turned over, rubbed her temples and got out of bed, dragging her dress skirt that she kneaded like pickles went downstairs to find some Drink water, in the restaurant on the first floor, Shan Yian was eating breakfast elegantly, Shan Shan walked over, grabbed the milk in front of him and drank it clean, Shan Yian glanced at her, then lowered his head, looked at the milk in his hand Information: "Go wash your face and then go downstairs, let's see how you look."
Shan Shan blinked and asked in surprise, "What do I look like?"
Shan Yi'an pointed to the mirror on the entrance wall not far from the restaurant, Shan Shan walked over to take a picture, and couldn't help screaming! It's a ghost in the mirror! Red and swollen eyes, black mascara, two black tear stains on the face! The lipstick on the mouth is also everywhere! The hair is also messed up like a chicken coop! The dress skirt is wrapped around the body like pickles!
Shan Shan quickly grabbed the skirt, trot upstairs at the speed of light, rushed into the bathroom, washed himself clean vigorously, and then changed into a loose and cute home clothes before heaved a sigh of relief!
She stepped on her slippers and went downstairs again, wiping her wet hair with a towel as she walked, shouting, "Shan Yi'an, you let me sleep like that, do you know how much it hurts my skin if I don't remove my makeup all night? I do dozens of I didn’t even make up the mask for the second time! I don’t care, if you give me money, I want to buy a mask.”
Shan Shan was yelling while walking towards the dining room, but when he passed the living room, out of the corner of his eye, he seemed to see someone who shouldn't be here, Shan Shan took two steps back, turned his head, and stared blankly at the person sitting on the sofa. She didn't expect to see him again so soon. She thought that as long as she didn't look for him, she might never meet him in her whole life.
But I didn't expect to see her again when she just woke up and was not ready at all. Shan Shan looked towards the restaurant in a panic, only to see that the restaurant was empty, and the man on the sofa stood up and said: " Your brother went to work."
Shan Shan pursed his lips, pulled off the towel from his head, held it tightly in his hand, looked at him and asked, "Why are you here?"
Tang Xiaotian stood a few steps away from her, looked straight at her with deep eyes and said, "I'm here to find you."
Shan Shan couldn't bear his focused eyes, twisted the towel even tighter with both hands, turned his head away, and asked, avoiding his sight, "What's the matter?"
Tang Xiaotian walked over, stood in front of her, took a deep breath, and said seriously: "Let's date."
Shan Shan blinked his eyes, thinking that he must have an auditory hallucination, raised his head and asked, "Huh?"
Tang Xiaotian's expression was still very serious and he said very seriously: "Get out with me."
Shan Shan was stunned for a long time in disbelief, and then asked cautiously: "Acquaintance? You are not joking with me, are you?"
Wasn't this person still rejecting her last night
Tang Xiaotian shook his head: "I'm serious."
The whole night of struggling and entanglement, at the last moment of the morning, finally dissipated with the laughter of the happy couple.
Yes, he can too, he can also be as happy as the couple in the morning, he can also make Shan Shan smile as happily as that woman.
Yes, how long has it been since he saw her bright smile? It seems that he has never seen her again since several years ago. It is obvious that even the child who is working hard to smile alone in the United States is tortured by him. all lost.
"Get out with me." Tang Xiaotian said softly again: "I will treat you well."
Shan Shan finally woke up from the huge shock. She looked at Tang Xiaotian and nodded her head vigorously without even thinking about it. She was so excited that she couldn't even speak. This feeling was like buying a lottery ticket at a loss. It was late, but someone came to her the next morning and said, "You've won! You've won the lottery! Huge! Huge jackpot!"
Shan Shan almost heard the sound of fireworks and colored balls exploding around her. She was so excited that she couldn't help screaming, and hugged Tang Xiaotian: "Okay! You said it! Don't go back on your word! We're dating! We're dating!" ! You absolutely must not go back on your word!"
Tang Xiaotian was amused by her excitement, and couldn't help reaching out to hug her back: "Okay, I don't regret it."
Shan Shan was so happy that she went crazy, she ran to tell Mama Tang immediately, when Mama Tang's old face heard the news, she screamed as excitedly as Shan Shan: "Really? Really? Is Xiao Tian finally enlightened!"
Shan Shan smiled and nodded vigorously: "Yes."
Mama Tang wiped the corners of her eyes and said, "I thought there was nothing to do in this life."
Shan Shan also wiped the corners of his eyes and said, "I also thought that this life was useless."
"Mom, Shan Shan, what's the matter with you?" Tang Xiaotian was terrified by these two people, what's the matter, why are you crying so much? He made them worry so much.
"Why didn't it happen?" Mother Tang retorted angrily, "With your granite head, it's a miracle that you're enlightened!"
Papa Tang, who had been silent all this time, suddenly said, "I think you two should stop dating."
Shan Shan was startled: "Why?"
"Damn old man, do you have the right to speak here?" Mother Tang jumped up angrily and anxiously. How could she have forgotten that there is still a granite head at home!
Papa Tang took a puff of cigarette, and continued: "I think you two should stop dating, and just get married!"
After Tang's father finished speaking, Tang's mother immediately clapped her hands and said, "Yes, yes, yes, yes! Marriage is good, what are you dating! You have been dating for more than ten years, and you know the bottom line, what else is there to date, Tang Xiaotian, you know Moji!"
It's still old Tang who knows Xiao Tang. This kid is a very responsible guy. If it's just a relationship, he might regret it when he wakes up that day. But if he gets married, even if the Shu family child comes back to him on his own initiative, he won't There will be no more thoughts, because he will definitely be responsible for his wife, his children, and his family.
"This... will this be too fast?" Shan Shan was a little startled, she just came to announce the good news that she finally won Tang Xiaotian, why did she jump to get married in an instant! Is it less than an hour from here
"No hurry, no hurry, Auntie has to book a hotel for you, order a dress, order a wedding photo, post a post, choose an auspicious date, ouch! It will take half a year to be busy! How fast! Not at all fast! Shan Shan, you are already 28 After getting married, it would be nice to give birth to the child before 29 or 30, oh hehehe, of course it doesn't matter if you want to give birth earlier."
"Mom, where is this going?" Tang Xiaotian's cheeks were slightly flushed, and he also felt that this matter was developing too fast, so fast that he felt like he was living in a dream.
"What's that and that? In the past, I just said that I would not force you, but now no one is forcing you. You are willing." Tang's mother was full of joy, looking for a helper without any objection: "Old Tang, you said yes no?"
Tang's father smashed the cigarette holder, looked at Tang Xiaotian, and said with some seriousness: "Man, be more open-minded, once you make a decision, you should go to the bottom of the boat."
"Yes." Under his father's stern eyes, Tang Xiaotian involuntarily stood up in a military posture!
"Hahaha, it's settled!" Mama Tang clapped her hands happily, not knowing what to do: "Hey, what should I do first? Ah, yes, let's inform relatives that my Xiaotian is finally getting married! Oh heh heh heh."
"This..." Shan Shan asked weakly, "Why doesn't anyone ask for my opinion?"
But Tang's mother has already rushed back to the room at lightning speed and started to make a phone call. Standing outside the room, she can hear her beaming voice: "Oh, his aunt, Xiaotian is getting married, yes Yes, the daughter-in-law is beautiful! If you want to come to drink wedding wine, you must come, hahahahaha."
Hearing Tang Ma's cheerful voice in the room, Tang Xiaotian couldn't help laughing, he turned his head, looked at Shan Shan, and asked softly, "Then it's decided like this?"
Shan Shan pursed his lips, his heart tightened with joy, but he turned his head away from Joe and suppressed a smile.
Tang Xiaotian smiled, stretched out his hand, took her hand gently, and asked again: "Marry me, will you?"
Shan Shan turned her head and looked at him, finally couldn't hold back any longer, squinted her eyes, opened her face, laughed happily, and then nodded vigorously.
Of course, she wished for it.
Tang Xiaotian felt the warm and joyful atmosphere in the room, and the heavy object tightly pressing on his chest seemed to disappear suddenly. Everyone in this family hasn't been this happy for a long time.
Perhaps, sometimes letting go of one's attachments and giving up one's goals is not a bad thing.
At least, the people around me laughed, how nice.