She said in a crying voice: "Shu Yawang, no one in this world loves you more than Tang Xiaotian."
(one)
Unknowingly, it has entered winter, and the weather has turned cold. The trees outside the house seem to have become bare overnight, and the grass in the yard is covered with scorched leaves.
Only wrapped in a shawl, the helper sitting in front of the floor-to-ceiling window and looking out of the house is skillfully sweeping the fallen leaves. The cold wind blows through and the leaves are messed up again.
The helper hurriedly pressed the leaves with a broom. At this moment, a middle-aged woman's voice came from outside the courtyard: "Excuse me, do you only live here?"
Shan Shan hurriedly moved away from the French window and hid behind the wall. The middle-aged woman was none other than Tang's mother who had been blasting her cell phone these few days.
Tang's mother's expression seemed to be very anxious. She made sure that she only lived here and immediately rushed in. The maid auntie stopped her several times but was pushed away by her. Tang's mother entered the room, crying Shouted loudly: "Shan Shan, Shan Shan, come out quickly, something happened."
Shan Shan walked down from the second floor silently, looked at her quietly, and did not greet her as affectionately as usual.
Shan Shan hasn't slept well for almost a month. She has deep dark circles under her eyes. Her hair, which has not been combed for several days, is scattered in sadness. Her face is terribly pale. She is thinner than when she left the Tang family last time a lot.
Seeing her like this, Tang's mother immediately took two steps forward with distress, wanting to hold her hand and talk to her as usual, but Shan Shan avoided it.
"You child, how did you make it like this." Tang's mother wiped the corner of her eyes and said, "If Xiaotian bullies you, you can tell auntie, auntie will help you make decisions and clean him up, don't lose your temper, you see Seeing you ignore Xiaotian for a month, he is in a hurry."
The frozen expression alone shattered immediately after the last sentence, and she hurriedly asked nervously, "What happened to him?"
Tang's mother said sadly: "Last night, when he was on a mission with the team members, he was stabbed by the gangster with a knife. Now he is in the hospital for emergency treatment. Come and see him quickly, he has been calling your name. "
"Really? How could he be stabbed? Isn't he very good?" Hearing Mama Tang say this, she immediately became anxious and worried, and quickly grabbed her hand and said, "Then go, go Look at him."
"Hey. Let's go." Seeing that Shan Shan was still so worried about Tang Xiaotian, Tang's mother couldn't help but let out a reassuring smile.
In fact, when Tang Xiaotian went home that day, he didn't say anything. He just told his father that there was no need to post wedding invitations, and told her that he canceled the hotel reservation. This was simply a blockbuster, which made both her and Old Tang dumbfounded.
She hurriedly called Shan Shan, but the phone on the other end was turned off. She was as anxious as an ant on a hot pot, bewildered. As a result, within two days, she heard that Shu Yawang's girl was back, and she hated it so much, that dead girl won't come back sooner or later, but Choi Xiaotian is going to get married and come back!
Do you really want our old Tang family to have no children or grandchildren? She came to the door angrily and made a fuss. Tang Xiaotian dragged her back. She was so angry that she didn't talk to her son for a month and kicked him out of the house.
As a result, a colleague from his team called in the middle of the night yesterday, saying that Tang Xiaotian was injured and told her to go to the hospital as soon as possible, and she panicked. Looking at Xiaotian on the hospital bed, she was in pain and angry.
Thinking about it again, isn't this a good opportunity, so she came to look for Dan Dan at dawn, hoping to get her daughter-in-law back.
She didn't even change her clothes, she just wore her nightdress at home and a long down jacket, and dragged Mama Tang to the hospital in a hurry. A thing with a short memory.
Why are you here again
But he was inside, he was hurt, Mama Tang said he called her name in his dream...
How could she control herself not to see him
Just take a look, take a look and leave, don't have illusions, don't be reluctant, just take a look at him and leave.
Just walking into the ward, the man on the bed tightly closed his eyes, his handsome cheeks seemed to be thinner, his short hair grew a lot, covering his full forehead, and his healthy bronze skin, It's also pale now.
Shan Shan raised his hand distressedly, and touched his cheek lightly. This month, he also seemed to be having a bad time. Is there a little bit because of her
A little bit because she left, it's not good
At this moment, Tang Xiaotian's chapped lips slowly opened, his Adam's apple twitched, and he seemed to utter a small sound. She only noticed this detail, she bent down slightly, and put her ears on his lips, listening He called out in a dry and painful voice: "... Wang,... Ya Wang."
This sound was so clear that even Tang's mother who was standing on the side could hear it clearly, Tang's mother covered her lips, and couldn't help but slap Tang Xiaotian's unconscious body vigorously: "Ah! Injustice! Injustice! "
She was not surprised or sad, her heart seemed to be used to this kind of pain.
She knew that she would have a bad time because of Tang Xiaotian, and Tang Xiaotian would only have a bad life because of Shu Yawang...
"Do you love her that much? Love so much that you can't extricate yourself?" Shan Shan asked softly in Tang Xiaotian's ear.
Tang Xiaotian was in a coma, and didn't answer her question, just a heartbreaking "Yawang" and tears from the corners of his eyes, which was already the best answer.
"Do you want to see her? It's painful to not be able to see her even though you're close at hand, isn't it?" Shan Shan raised his hand and gently wiped away the tears from the corners of his eyes. With her eyes half down, she whispered softly, she understood the pain too well.
It hurts when you are awake, and even when you are asleep, you will cry from the pain.
She straightened up slowly, raised her hand, and gently rubbed Tang Xiaotian's hair, just like he often did to her, and said softly: "Don't cry, Brother Xiaotian, I will let you see her. "
After Shan Shan finished speaking, he slowly straightened up and walked out of the ward step by step.
This time, Mama Tang didn't stop her, she no longer had the face to keep this girl.
(two)
When Shan Shan knocked on the door of Shu Yawang's house, it was a white-haired woman in her fifties who opened the door. She held the doorknob, looked at the beautiful and strange girl outside and asked, "Who are you looking for?"
Shan Shan smiled politely: "Auntie, is Shu Yawang at home? I have something to do with her."
Shu Ma opened the door and said, "Here you are, Yawang, someone is looking for you."
Shu Yawang's voice came from the room: "Who is it?"
After a while, she walked into the living room and saw Dan Dan. She was taken aback for a moment, and then seemed to remember that she was the girl who followed Tang Xiaotian after she met in the compound that day: "It's you, what's the matter?"
Shan Shan nodded, stood outside the door, looked at her, and said softly, "I have something I want to talk to you about."
"Come in." Shu Yawang politely invited her in, went in alone, sat on the sofa, Shu Yawang sat next to her, Shu's mother brought a cup of tea over, just thanked her and took it.
Shu's mother also sat down, just holding the teacup and looking at Shu's mother, Shu Yawang winked at her mother, telling her to avoid it for a while, Shu's mother quickly smiled and said: "I'm going to cook, you talk, you Let's talk."
Holding the teacup, Shan Shan said after a while, "My name is Shan Shan, we met when we were young, do you remember?"
Shu Yawang looked at her vigorously, then shook her head regretfully: "Sorry, I can't remember."
"Many years ago, you and Xia Mu helped me kidnap my brother." Shan Shan raised his head and reminded him a little more.
Shu Yawang finally remembered that she was the girl with big eyes and two ponytails, and her brother was Xia Mu's classmate. Xia Mu...
When Shu Yawang thought of this name, and thought of those things when she was a teenager, her heart ached uncontrollably. This is a disease that occurs for many years, and there is no cure.
"You helped me at that time. I always remember Tang Xiaotian's kindness to me. Later, I followed my mother to the United States. I thought it would be difficult to meet you again in this life." Shan Shan turned the water glass in his hand and kept his head down. Said: "But six years later, I met Tang Xiaotian again in the United States."
As Shan Shan spoke, she smiled wryly, and suddenly thought, is all of this predestined, if not for the help when she was a child, if not for the reunion later, would her life have been much easier
However, even if she was asked to choose again, she would still choose to run after him in that narrow alley in that snowy day.
as now.
Holding the water glass in his hand, Shan Shan told Shu Yawang about Tang Xiaotian bit by bit in a soft and slow voice. He smuggled to America for her, he found Qu Weiran for her, and ruined her future for her. He took care of his parents for her, and he rejected countless good girls for her, including herself.
When Shan Shan said this, tears fell into the water glass in her hand like pearls with a broken thread, and she said in a crying voice: "Shu Yawang, no one in this world loves you more than Tang Xiaotian."
"Shu Yawang, why do you only see Xia Mu's dedication to you, but not Tang Xiaotian's? Why do you only think about what Xia Mu lost for you? Didn't you think about what Tang Xiaotian lost for you? Why do you only feel sorry for Xia Mu staying here? Six years in prison, but Tang Xiaotian didn’t even look at the waiting for you? He was waiting for you, waiting for you all the time, just waiting for you to look back at him. He doesn’t want you to be embarrassed, he doesn’t want you to be sad, he will always be wronged Myself! Shu Yawang, tell me, did he really pay less for you than Xia Mu?"
Shu Yawang lowered her head and didn't say a word. Shu's mother was at the kitchen door, secretly listening, crying silently, wiping her tears with her old palms. Tang Xiaotian's goodness, no one knows better than her original mother-in-law .
"Shu Yawang, originally Tang Xiaotian had agreed to marry me, my wedding dress had already been ordered, his father had even written the wedding invitation, and his mother had notified all relatives and friends. But because you came back, Because he saw you, everything is different, and all the illusions of happiness are over." Shan Dan said here, looked up at Shu Yawang, and said softly: "Do you know how much I hate you?"
"I hate why you came back, and I hate why you can't make Tang Xiaotian happy! If it was you, if it was you, I would definitely make him happy! If it was you, I would like to change the bride's name to yours, so that Next to Tang Xiaotian's name, there will always be Shu Yawang." Shan Dan cried, looked at Shu Yawang and said, "Shu Yawang, I beg you, can you stay with him?"
But at this point, Shu Yawang was a little excited: "I know you love Xia Mu, but didn't you make an agreement with him in the next life? Then you can give Tang Xiaotian the remaining life?"
"Do you really have no feelings for him at all? Do you really have the heart to see him waiting for you with guilt and pain?"
"Shu Yawang, you can't be so selfish."
"You can't always bully Tang Xiaotian, he loves you too much!"
Shan Dan became more and more excited as she talked, she felt sorry for Tang Xiaotian, no one understood Tang Xiaotian's inner torment better than her, and no one was more eager than her to hope that Tang Xiaotian would be happy and relieved.
His only antidote was the woman in front of her, but she lowered her head and said nothing, like a rock, unshakable.
"Shu Yawang, Tang Xiaotian was stabbed by gangsters with a knife. You know how good he is. He wouldn't get hurt at all. It's all because of you, and it's all because you came back that made him go crazy! He got hurt! Yes! He is on the hospital bed now! Just calling your name like that, can you go and see him?" Shan Shan stood up and tugged at Shu Yawang: "Go and see him! He is waiting for you ah!"
Shu Yawang, who had been silent all this time, slowly raised her head, pulled Shan Shan's hand away little by little, and said in a very cold voice: "I'm sorry, I can't go."
Shan Shan pursed her lips tremblingly, and strong hatred and anger appeared in her eyes! Her cold and firm refusal made her think of Tang Xiaotian, who also rejected her again and again like this! Every time she was rejected, she had to hold her broken heart and feel sad for a long time! And her angel, the person she loves the most, is also so humble and desperate to be rejected time and time again in front of this woman!
Unforgivable! Can't! Never forgive her!
Shan Shan suddenly seemed to go crazy, grabbed Shu Yawang, and said ruthlessly: "You have to go if you don't! Go! Come with me! You go to see him! Go and see her!"
"I won't go." Shu Yawang was still very stubborn, she shook off Shan Shan's hand, wanted to calm down, and told her well, but Shan Shan had already fallen into madness, her eyes caught a glimpse of a fruit knife on the coffee table , she suddenly stepped forward, snatched Shu Yawang into her hand, held Shu Yawang, pointed the knife at her neck, glared at her with hostility and said, "Are you going or not! Kill you! I will make him stop thinking about it, and he will never suffer again!"
Shu Yawang frowned, looking sadly at this girl who was driven into a corner by love and crazy about love, she couldn't say a word.
Shu's mother, who had been eavesdropping, rushed out quickly: "Oh, girl, what are you doing, if you have something to say, please put down the knife, put it down quickly."
Shan Shan shook his head vigorously, pulled Shu Yawang over, turned her back to him, grabbed her with one hand, and put a knife against her neck with the other: "Go away! Go away! There's nothing to say! The good words are exhausted, and she will not change for the rest of her life! Shu Yawang, let me tell you! You have two choices today, either die! Go to accompany Xia Mu who was killed by you! Or live, and Tang Xiaotian Together!"
"I'm going all out. All of this must come to an end today." Shan Dan pulled Shu Yawang back step by step, walked outside the house, just in time to meet a middle-aged man going upstairs, he rushed forward nervously: "what are you doing!"
"Back! Back off!" Shan Shan pushed the knife closer to Shu Yawang's neck, the man stepped back a little, the corridor was very narrow, Shan Shan didn't go down, she pulled Shu Yawang directly to the top of the building, came to the rooftop.
"Old Shu, hurry up and call for someone, hurry up." Shu's mother urged Shu's father to call for someone, and she just pulled Shu Yawang to stand on the one-meter-high fence on the roof, which was only a dozen centimeters wide. , both of them were very thin and standing on it, blown by the cold winter wind, they were all precarious.
Shu's mother was so frightened that she didn't know what to do. She pleaded: "Girl, what's the matter? Come down and tell me how dangerous it is up there. Auntie, I beg you, can you come down?"
"You beg me, it's better to beg your daughter, let her go." Shan Dan pulled Shu Yawang, glanced at the 7-story building behind him, and said with a sneer, "Look, it's so high, you will definitely fall if you fall. into patties."
"Shu Yawang, today, you can choose between life or death. I'll give you ten minutes, and you can answer me after you think about it."
Shu Yawang also glanced down, her face showed no panic or fear at all, she was held hostage by Shan Shan without any resistance, she could feel the girl holding the knife trembling slightly, she seemed to be very scared, more than She is still afraid.
"Is it worth it?" Shu Yawang asked softly, "Whether I choose to live or die, it won't do you any good."
"Yes." Shan Shan smiled cruelly and crazy: "If you choose to die, I will jump down with you, and it will be over, and you will never feel pain again." Shan Shan's tears flowed down: "You choose to live , then I have to be with him, as long as he is happy, I will feel happy."
"You love him very much." Shu Yawang murmured softly, this kind of blazing feeling that could burn herself and the one she loves to ashes, she had had it once before.
That young man also loves himself crazily like her.
Shu Yawang gently raised her hand, held the Pisces necklace tightly attached to her chest, and remained silent for a long time. She seemed to be caught in that memory, that once-in-a-lifetime love, that past event that she could still vividly remember until now, That young man who is still exquisite and has never aged, that promise in the next life.
Shan Shan was also silent, the knife in her hand was no longer a sharp weapon to hurt others, but a tool to bring courage to herself. She looked at more and more people in front of her, including Mama Shu, Papa Tang, the police, and the fire department. The soldiers of the team, they kept talking, and they seemed to be trying to persuade her to let go, but she couldn't hear anything in her ears, only the whistling wind in her ears, she had already lost consciousness from the cold, the surrounding The woman in the house was still wearing coral fleece pajamas at home, and it was already as cold as ice.
The two women trembled in the wind, as if they were about to fall at any moment.
"I'm sorry, I still can't promise you." In the wind, Shan Shan seemed to hear Shu Yawang answering her like this, and she opened her eyes wide in disbelief and looked at her: "Why? Do you hate him so much?" Shan Shan's voice Has collapsed: "You still think I'm joking with you! I will really push you down!"
Shan Shan stretched out his hand to push Shu Ya Wang away, and everyone around him screamed in fright. Shu Ya looked at the scary scenery, but he was not afraid at all, and even said with some expectation: "Push it."
The next life is really too far away, she is really tired of waiting, she really wants to see him again...
The way she looked at death like home really angered Shan Shan, how could she be like this, she despised Tang Xiaotian so much, she would rather die than be with him, such a woman, such a woman who has always broken Tang Xiaotian's heart! Then go to hell! Go to hell!
(three)
"That's good, I'll send you to accompany Xia Mu!" Shan Shan stretched out his hand, and was about to push Shu Yawang down, but his ears, which had almost blocked all external sounds, heard a voice: "Shan Shan!"
Just as if he woke up from this crazy state in an instant, he turned his head and looked at the man who called her very pitifully. He held his belly and walked over with Tang's mother's support, looking at her with extremely painful eyes , softly said: "Shan Shan, stop."
Shan Shan shook his head lightly, still with the unique tenderness towards Tang Xiaotian, and said softly: "Brother Xiaotian, don't cry, just go back to the ward and lie down, I can take her to see you right away."
"I don't cry." Tang Xiaotian pushed away his mother's hand holding him, staggered slowly over, and stretched out his hand to Shan Shan: "I don't cry, can you come down?"
Shan Shan shook her head vigorously: "No, I want her to be with you. She doesn't know how much you love her, how long you've waited for her, or how long you've broken your heart for her, Brother Xiaotian, You are always too kind, and you are unwilling to do anything that embarrasses her, and you are unwilling to say anything that forces her. It’s okay, I will help you with these things. I don’t need to be your bride, but I will definitely let you Get your happiness."
Tang Xiaotian's eyes were red, he looked at Shan Dan very sadly, it was he who forced such a bright and lively girl into such a situation, and it was his stubbornness that hurt her so deeply.
Tang Xiaotian looked at her distressedly and said, "Don't be so single, don't be like this."
Shan Shan shook his head vigorously, and the knife in his hand moved closer to Shu Yawang: "Hey! Shu Yawang, you must have answered wrong just now, please answer me again, do you want to go down to accompany Xia Mu, or live with Xiaotian?" brother together?"
"I don't want to lie to you." Shu Yawang glanced at Tang Xiaotian apologetically, and still insisted on her answer: "No matter how many times I answer it, it's the same. In my life, I will never betray Xia Mu again."
Tang Xiaotian knew the answer clearly, but he was sad because she said that, and he became angry just because of her stubborn answer: "Why do you do this! Why! Why! Do you want to accompany Xia Mu so much? Okay , then I will fulfill you!"
Shan Shan really wanted to push Shu Yawang down crazily, Tang Xiaotian, who was closest to them, endured the pain in his body, stretched out his hand and turned over nimbly, pulled Shu Yawang into the wall, fell down, Shan Shan didn't push it Shu Yawang, but because of the counter force, she fell forward...
"Ah-ah- Shan Shan!" Mother Tang screamed and rushed forward, Shan Shan looked back at her, tears were flying in the air, and her body fell rapidly. She looked at the ground and seemed to see Shan Yi from a distance. When An got out of the car, she seemed to hear Mama Tang's scream, and raised her head to see Shan Shan who fell from the roof and his face was deformed in horror. He didn't even close the car door, and ran forward with all his might!
Everything was in these few seconds, but it was projected in slow motion in Shan Shan's eyes. The rising air slapped her cheeks with deep pain. She had no room for thinking. The only thing she could think of was that she might die soon. Bar.
Her body was pulled down by gravity, and just a second before she was about to fall into a coma, she suddenly felt her body pause in the air, and then was hugged tightly by a strong shoulder. In the picture, he was forced to complete a flip in the air
Flipping from the ground, it turned into a blue sky, ah, what a beautiful cloud...
Just thinking about it like this, then what greeted her was a violent impact, her body seemed to be completely shattered in half, she spit out a mouthful of blood in pain, but her body seemed to fall into a pile of cotton, sunk in, limp Soft, and was popped up again, she heard the person holding him tightly grunt behind him, those big hands, hugging her tightly all the time, protecting her head.
She heard Shan Yi'an anxiously calling her name outside the air mattress, climbed onto the air mattress regardless of her appearance, patted her cheek nervously and asked, "Single, Shan, answer me."
Shan Shan opened his eyes, looked at him and smiled softly, as if saying nothing, don't worry.
The medical rescue personnel who had been waiting for a long time came up immediately, carried Shan Shan out, and then carried out the person behind her. Only then did Dan Dan have a chance to turn his head and look at that person, who frowned in pain , blood oozed from the bandage on his abdomen, staining his gray coat red, he struggled to stand up, and walked towards her through the crowd, eyes full of concern and anxiety.
Shan Shan just quietly opened his eyes and watched him walk over.
It really is him...
Tang Xiaotian, he is always so kind, so kind, and so heroic.
So let her, time and time again, just can't give up...
She didn't know whether it was because her body hurt too much or her heart was too tired, she slowly closed her eyes, although she really wanted to talk to him...
I really want to ask him to forgive her, she shouldn't hurt the woman he loves most.
He must hate her. Such a pestering woman must be very annoying.
"Doctor, doctor! Come here quickly and show her! Is she all right? Is she all right?" Shan Yian dragged the doctor and asked desperately, the emergency doctor hurriedly listened to Shan Shan, and then said: "The heart is still beating Let’s go, it’s all right. Hurry up and send him to the hospital for a comprehensive examination.”
"Okay, okay, send it quickly." Shan Yi'an, who was calm and decisive, followed the doctor's words like all ordinary people who were afraid of losing their loved ones.
Soon Shan Shan was pushed into the ambulance, and the people upstairs also ran down one after another. Tang's mother felt distressed and ran to Shan Shan's side to watch, muttering constantly, Shu Yawang also came down, watching them from a distance.
The moment Shan Yi'an saw her, his anger instantly recovered him from the state of panic, he strode towards the injured Tang Xiaotian, and Shu Yawang who was standing aside, his eyes were cold, and he looked at them with sarcasm and said, : "Maybe you think the most terrifying man in your life is called Qu Weiran! But let me tell you, if there is anything wrong with my sister, I will let you know that Qu Weiran is just a child who can't eat candy That's all."
He paused for a second, then continued to look at them with cold and arrogant eyes and said, "What is scary, I will let you understand it slowly."
After finishing speaking, he didn't look at them again, turned around and got into the ambulance, stood by Shan Dan's side, and went to the hospital together.
Tang Xiaotian looked away and went to the ambulance without saying a word for a long time. A nurse came to him and asked him if he needed help. His wound was open, but he shook his head slowly. When he was a special soldier, he was often injured. Such a forced drop and wound didn't make him feel much pain.
What he hurts now is his heart, the girl who was driven crazy by him.
"Aren't you feeling guilty?" Shu Yawang, who had never spoken to him proactively for many years, suddenly walked up slowly, stood beside him and asked softly, "Do you feel that you are terribly hateful?"
Tang Xiaotian turned to look at her.
Shu Yawang frowned slightly, and said softly: "Many years ago, when I watched Xia Mu being taken away by the police car, I must have felt the same way."
Shu Yawang sighed deeply, looked up at Tang Xiaotian who hadn't seen it carefully for a long time, and said in a tone like an old friend: "Xiaotian, we are all the same, we will not choose the right time at the right time. people, so we are doomed to hurt those who love us the most.
"Xiaotian, after so many years, do you really still love me? Are you really attracted to that girl without any hesitation?" Shu Ya looked at Tang Xiaotian who was silent and said, "Maybe, I You know yourself better than you, and what you don’t want to betray is just your most beautiful dream when you were young. But Xiaotian, I’ve woken up from that dream long ago, and you should too.”
Tang Xiaotian looked at her, and said with difficulty: "Are you awake? If you are awake, why are you still alone after so many years?"
Shu Yawang shook her head: "No, I've never been alone, Xia Mu has always been in my heart, he loves me deeply, I know, as long as I think of him, my heart is still warm, so I don't feel hard at all, just I miss him often."
After Shu Yawang finished speaking, she looked at Tang Xiaotian sadly: "But Xiaotian, what about you? I don't love you anymore. Every time you think of me, doesn't your heart break?"
Tang Xiaotian just cared a little bit softly because of her problem, and his eyes were reddened with grievance in an instant. Shu Yawang suddenly stepped forward, stretched out his hands, hugged him gently, and whispered in his ear: " Xiaotian, that girl really loves you, don't be like me, you will only realize how precious you are after losing it."
Tang Xiaotian's tears fell slowly, Shu Yawang let go of his hands, took a step back, raised his hand to gently wipe away his tears: "This must be the last time I hurt you."
"Xiaotian, I'm sorry, really." After Shu Yawang finished speaking, she turned and left.
Tang Xiaotian watched her leaving back, he always watched her back, but he couldn't do anything.
That was the last time Shu Yawang appeared in Tang Xiaotian's life. Later, her family moved to another city, and then she disappeared. It was not until four years later that Tang Xiaotian heard from her again.
It was a very simple funeral. I heard that when she was supervising the gardening site, she was injured by scattered engineering materials and died on the spot.
She can finally take her favorite kissing fish necklace, find that delicate and beautiful boy, and go to the long-awaited unbreakable promise.
(Four)
After Shan Shan was admitted to the hospital, she had a fever intermittently, and then she held Shan Yian and cried all day and night. Shan Yian invited the best doctor to see her. After a comprehensive examination, the doctor found that Shan Shan inherited her mother's depression. Excited in the context of chronic grief, it has been severe, even with horrific self-destructive tendencies.
After Tang's mother went to the hospital to see the list, she returned home and remained silent for a long time, not even turning on the lights when it was dark. Finally, when Tang Xiaotian came back, she said deeply: "From now on, I won't force you to get married. Stop looking for Shandan."
Such a good girl, she still remembers the first time she saw her, she had a small face that was more beautiful than the peach blossoms blooming outside the house, a pleasing sweet smile and a soft voice, but only ten years later, She was tortured by her own son like a rotten flower that fell into the mud, exuding a dying black breath.
She is also at fault for all of this, she has always pinned her hopes on being alone, has been cheering her on, giving her energy, giving her illusions, making her sink deeper and deeper, and finally she cannot extricate herself from destruction.
Tang Xiaotian didn't turn on the lights, didn't speak, walked from the dark living room to his room in the dark, sat on the chair, bowed his head in silence for a long time.
After the Lunar New Year, a small southern town that hadn’t snowed for several years unexpectedly began to snow secretly at night. When people opened their eyes, the house was already covered in white snow, so white that it seemed to purify the soul.
Tang Xiaotian finally returned to the dormitory early in the morning after completing an arrest mission. He turned on his mobile phone, and a dozen reminder text messages of missed calls swarmed in.
The numbers are all from the same mobile phone. He has been calling since one o'clock in the morning yesterday. Just as he was about to call back, the phone rang again. Tang Xiaotian answered the phone: "Hello."
"Tang Xiaotian! Is Shan Shan on your side?" On the phone, Shan Yi'an's voice was so anxious that he was going crazy.
Tang Xiaotian hurriedly bent down to look under the bed, opened the closet, pushed aside the clothes, searched, and searched all the places where people could hide in his dormitory before replying: "No, she's not here with me, why? gone?"
"She's gone! She disappeared from the hospital last night! I can't find her anywhere!" Shan Yi'an said anxiously and irritablely.
"Don't worry, I'll go out and find her right away." Tang Xiaotian hung up the phone and drove out in a hurry. Because it was snowing and it was early in the morning, there were almost no people on the road. Tang Xiaotian looked around anxiously. In such a cold day, she Where are you going? Tang Xiaotian thought hard, thinking about everything about Shan Shan, but couldn't think of any of Shan Shan's hobbies. Where does she usually like to go to play? What does she like to eat? It seems that her hot pot restaurant has long been closed. What is she doing now
He doesn't know all of this.
Yes, all these years, she was the only one who revolved around him, but he didn't even pay any attention to her.
Tang Xiaotian stopped the car, wiped his face with his hands guiltily, then he suddenly thought of something, started the car immediately, and drove to the playground in the city!
His jeep was driving fast in the snow, and he arrived at the entrance of the amusement park in a short while. He parked the car casually on the side of the road, got out of the car and rushed inside.
The snow kept falling, and Tang Xiaotian was running back and forth in every corner of the amusement park in the white snow. He was circling around like a headless fly, fearing that he would miss a spot. He raised his head, and the corners of his eyes From the corner of his eye, he saw the tallest ferris wheel in the amusement park, and he suddenly remembered what he said to him just under the ferris wheel that year.
She said: "Tang Xiaotian, no matter how long you are in the Ferris wheel, I will wait for you below, as long as you are willing to come out, you will definitely be able to see me."
Tang Xiaotian seemed to have been guided, and ran towards the Ferris wheel with all his strength, but the Ferris wheel stood there quietly, and there was no one below. Tang Xiaotian looked around for a while, and his shoulders collapsed in frustration.
she's not here...
Tang Xiaotian turned around and walked forward slowly. After walking for a while, he saw a little snowman on the lounge chair not far from the Ferris wheel.
The little snowman, all white and white, if it wasn't for the red scarf, it would have almost merged with the white snow. She curled up on the chair, raised her head silly, and looked at the Ferris wheel in the distance …
Tang Xiaotian had a sore nose, and walked quickly over while taking off his coat. He walked up to her and patted off the snow on her head, shoulders, and arms. He sniffed and put his coat on her .
The girl who seemed to be sealed in ice and snow looked at him slowly, showing a smile that was still pure like an angel, and she said in a voice that seemed to be talking in her sleep: "Brother Xiaotian, you are here!" , I knew you would come, you are my Snow White, as soon as it snows, you will appear."
"Yes, I am your Snow White, and I will definitely come." Tang Xiaotian said softly in a soft voice that he had never had before. He wrapped her tightly with his coat, then took off his scarf, carefully put it on for her who was cold, and let him carry it for him, still looking at the Ferris wheel foolishly and said: "Brother Xiaotian, I What a fool, I thought that as long as I kept waiting, the spinning Ferris wheel would stop one day and bring you to me one day, but I was wrong, the Ferris wheel you were sitting on broke down long ago, you have been On top, always on top, no matter how I wait, you won’t come down.”
"I'm down, I'm jumping off." Tang Xiaotian hugged Shan Shan horizontally, his voice choked up: "Shan Shan, it's too cold here, I'll take you back, we'll come back another day, another day to ride the Ferris wheel, let's sit together, okay? good?"
"Brother Xiaotian..." Shan Shan's voice became softer, and she looked at Tang Xiaotian affectionately with her beautiful eyes: "If I die like Xia Mu, will you remember him as hard as Shuya remembers him?" My whole life?"
"What nonsense are you talking about!" Tang Xiaotian shouted in a low voice: "No nonsense!"
Shan Shan didn't stop, she leaned on Tang Xiaotian's chest, and said angrily: "I heard that Shu Yawang promised Xia Mu the next life, I really want to do that too."
Shan Shan took a deep breath, raised his hand, and lovingly stroked Tang Xiaotian's handsome cheek: "But, my luck is too bad, I don't know if I will meet you again in the next life, that's why I will work so hard in this life , working so hard, I want to give you the best love."
"Do you remember me, do you remember that there was once a person who loved you so hard?"
It wasn't until this moment that Tang Xiaocai realized that there were cuts of different shades on her wrists, and the pure white snow was sprinkled with bright red, like plum blossoms blooming in the snow.
"Shan Shan, Shan Shan, stop talking, don't talk!" Tang Xiaotian was startled, and ran forward with all his strength holding Shan Shan. He had never felt that the road was so long and he was so tired from running. He was getting weaker and weaker, he was afraid and anxious, he felt that he was about to collapse, he couldn't watch this girl die in his hands like this.
"Shan Dan, Shan Shan." Tang Xiaotian finally ran to his car, opened the door and put Shan Shan in, pulled a piece of clothes to wrap her wrist, then turned on the air conditioner to the maximum, started the car, and called the notification Yi An applauded the doctor and galloped to the hospital.
As soon as his car stopped at the entrance of the hospital, Shan Yi'an opened the door, took Shan Shan off with a careful look, and put him on the stretcher. The nurse hurriedly pushed him into the emergency room. An stopped, looked at him with cold eyes and said, "So? Do you feel guilty now? Do you want to make up for Shan Shan, or do you want to start over with her?"
"I tell you, no matter how many times you start again, you will return to the original point, and your ending will always be the same." Shan Yi'an looked at Tang Xiaotian warningly and said: "If you get closer to her again and give her hope, If it makes her sad, I will kill Shu Yawang."
"I will do what I say." After Shan Yi'an finished speaking, he took a last look at Tang Xiaotian and turned to leave.
Tang Xiaotian stood at the entrance of the hospital, and he hasn't left for a long time, nor has he moved forward...
He couldn't deny Shan Yi'an's words.
No matter how many times they start over, the ending is the same.
Because even at this point, he still has no confidence and has already forgotten about Shu Yawang.
The love that has been engraved in his bones and blood since he became sensible has become a habit that he cannot change and cannot reverse. He is an incompetent person, and he cannot promise any happiness to me.
And she is no longer as strong and bright as before.
All her enthusiasm, all her love and even her life were exhausted in this love.
What qualifications does he have to say again: start from the beginning
No… not at all.
When he got this answer, Tang Xiaotian tightly closed his eyes, feeling so sad that he could hardly breathe.
Just, maybe, the only thing I can do for you, from beginning to end, is to leave you and not give you any hope...
Tang Xiaotian turned around slowly, taking heavy steps, step by step, away from his only possibility of happiness...
When Shan Shan woke up again, and it was a week later, she looked at the melted snow outside the house without saying a word, Shan Yi'an walked in, touched her hair gently, and said softly: "Shan Shan, I Lost one sister, don't let me lose another."
"You are my only relative, don't leave me." Shan Yi'an held her hand tightly, looked into her eyes and said: "Depression is not terrible at all, I will definitely find a doctor to cure you .”
Shan Shan came back to his senses and looked at Shan Yi'an gently. Now he seems to be just like when he was a child, he was always worried that his mother would jump off the roof of the hospital. Every day, he was terrified of his only relative. leave yourself.
She shouldn't be like this, she shouldn't be depressed like this, even for Shan Yi'an, she has to work hard, just like her mother did for her, to overcome the serious illness and the endless world-weary impulse.
Shan Shan took a deep breath, smiled forcefully, and said softly: "I will work hard. I will work hard to never allow anyone to live on the tip of my heart, even if it is empty, I don't want to let it hurt like this again. "
Shan Yi'an said: "You are stubborn, there is always someone living in your heart."
"No, I won't live in the future. I want to forget him, forever."
This time, she really gave up.
That period of unrequited love that lasted ten years, that period of unrequited love that was about to kill her, she would use the rest of the time, work hard, to forget him a little bit.
Half a year later, Shan Shan recovered well and returned to the United States again. After that, she never came back, and never saw Tang Xiaotian again.
During the day, she always dresses up beautifully and goes out, with a smile on her face every day, she seems to be the happiest girl in the world. But in the middle of the night, she always thought of him and wanted to die, but she still gritted her teeth, shed tears, cut herself with a knife, and forced herself over and over again, forget him, forget him, don't think about it, don't think about it , don't think about it...
Repeatedly, every day.
She thought that loving him was an incurable disease, a drug addiction that could not be quit.
(over)