The autumn leaves are falling, the winter wind arrives early, but there is no news from the winter snow.
The leaves on the roadside fell at the end of the autumn, and only the dry and bald branches were growing up like the sky.
Life in the third year of high school is as quiet as a pool of water that does not move, quiet and insipid. Without Gu Tao's interruption, Gu Chaoming experienced what time is like an arrow in the tense preparation time of his senior year.
The daily review made Gu Chaoming feel like he was staying in a small room and had never been out.
In the third year of high school, there was no life without Gu Tao. Except for Lin Jianfan, Gu Chaoming's mind was full of knowledge every day, and there was no room for other things.
The senior year he imagined in the second year of high school was such an ordinary waste of time. When Gu Tao still appeared in his life, the senior year he imagined was to close the door that could no longer be closed in the sound of Gu Tao's scolding, regardless of Gu Tao's abusive voice. Diligently read. Maybe sometimes have to endure some scars, and then hide from Lin Jianfan the next day.
The imagined senior year is Gu Tao's senior year, but in reality, Gu Chaoming and Lin Jianfan were walking home for dinner together.
In winter, when school was over, it was already a little gloomy. Lin Jianfan walked beside Gu Chaoming and talked about going to the library to review on Saturday.
"yawn!"
Gu Chaoming listened to Lin Jianfan's words and looked at the birds parked on the fallen branches by the roadside. Lin Jianfan sneezed and Gu Chaoming took his eyes off the birds.
Lin Jianfan touched his itchy nose.
Gu Chaoming took off the red scarf around his neck and wrapped it around Lin Jianfan who was sneezing.
The neck was warm, and the scarf still carried the temperature of Gu Chaoming.
Putting a scarf on Lin Jianfan, Gu Chaoming tore off the gloves from his hands. She put her palm on Lin Jianfan's red cheek, and used the temperature of her palm to pass on Lin Jianfan's warmth.
Holding Lin Jianfan Ronghong's cheek, and seeing Lin Jianfan looking into his own eyes, Gu Chaoming couldn't help rubbing it.
Lin Jianfan's cheeks were squeezed into a ball under Gu Chaoming's palm, and his mouth was forced to squeeze into a goldfish mouth.
Gu Chaoming laughed, the fun in the tiring review of life in the third year of high school is so simple.
Release Lin Jianfan's face, Gu Chaoming put on his gloves again.
This winter is particularly cold, much colder than last year's winter. The gloomy wind never stops on the road, and the sun has never been seen a day after winter. Gu Chaoming just wanted to bask in the warm sun in winter, but God never gave him a chance.
A gust of overcast wind blew across the road, Ben walked side by side, when the overcast wind came, Gu Chaoming ran to Lin Jianfan and spread his arms to block Lin Jianfan's path.
He's protecting him from the wind.
Gu Chaoming had done this before. When Lin Jianfan asked him what he was doing, Gu Chaoming said, "The wind is coming, help you keep out the wind."
A little silly, Lin Jianfan was blocked by a big man who was over 1.8 meters tall, the wind rushed past Gu Chaoming, Lin Jianfan was protected by him, and the winter wind suddenly became an enemy.
Gu Chaoming would always play some tricks like this to make him happy. Gu Chaoming was too naive when it came to love, but Lin Jianfan couldn't help but snicker every time.
His boyfriend is so stupid, how can he be so stupid and cute.
Lin Jianfan did not allow Gu Chaoming to evaluate him with cuteness, but it was okay for him to evaluate Gu Chaoming with cuteness.
Passing by the convenience store on the side of the road, Lin saw Fan La pull Gu Chaoming's padded sleeve to signal him to stop.
"I want to drink yogurt." Lin Jianfan said with a wink to Gu Chaoming.
Because it was winter and the weather was cold, Gu Chaoming asked Lin Jianfan to drink yogurt. Lin Jianfan was an obedient child, and Gu Chaoming said that he hadn't had much yogurt since the beginning of winter.
Gu Chaoming looked at Lin Jianfan who was blinking, his nose bleeds. There was a shaken bottle of Coke in his heart. Seeing the expression on Fan's face begging him to agree to drink yogurt, Lin burst out with excitement.
It was just a winking expression of request, and Gu Chaoming agreed very unprincipled.
Lin Jianfan nodded in agreement with Gu Chaoming, and laughed.
As long as Lin sees Fan happy, this yogurt is worth buying.
Gu Chaoming not only agreed with Lin Jianfan to drink yogurt without any principle, but Lin Jianfan just wanted to take a small bottle, Gu Chaoming stretched out his hand from behind him and took out a stack of yogurt and went directly to the checkout.
In winter, yogurt is even colder, and yogurt slides in the mouth. Lin Jianfan, who drank yogurt in winter, was as happy as a child and talked more than usual.
Along the way, he jumped, and the jumping pace proved to Gu Chaoming that he was in a good mood.
He jumped and talked a lot. Unlike the usual Lin Jianfan, Gu Chaoming looked at Lin Jianfan who was walking beside him and kept talking.
A bottle of yogurt is really powerful.
Gu Chaoming bit the straw and looked at the lively Lin Jianfan and laughed.
Lin Jianfan was so happy today that he walked into the unit building and was still jumping up and down the stairs. Gu Chaoming walked behind with a plastic bag of yogurt in his hand, and told him to be careful not to fall.
Lin Jianfan, who was jumping up the stairs, stopped at the corner of the stairs. He was wearing the same style and different color couple gloves that Gu Chaoming bought him when the weather was just cold. He leaned on the handrail and looked down at the corner of the next stairs. of Gu Chaoming.
"Give me the key, I'll open the door today." Lin Jianfan stretched out his gloved hand to Gu Chaoming and said.
Gu Chaoming walked up the stairs and looked up at the happy Lin Jianfan, took out the key from his pocket with a smile, walked up a few stairs, and placed the key securely in Lin Jianfan's gloved palm.
As soon as he got the key, Lin Jian Fan Xiao ran upstairs one step and two steps, and threw Gu Chaoming downstairs.
Gu Chaoming accelerated to keep up, but still not as fast as Lin Jianfan.
Stepping up the stairs, he looked up at Lin Jianfan who was running upstairs, and saw Lin Jianfan who had already reached the door of the house and stuck his head out to see where he was going.
Going home together, Gu Chaoming raised his head and smiled, and one of his wishes was fulfilled earlier.
He liked the feeling, the feeling of coming home together, and the new home he rented was theirs. Although he just went home for dinner at night, when he saw Lin Jianfan sitting in the living room resting or helping him in the kitchen while cooking, Gu Chaoming's inner happiness was overwhelmed by the ocean.
The current life overlapped with the future he imagined. Sometimes, in a trance, when he saw Lin Jianfan sitting on the sofa in the living room watching TV from the open door of the kitchen, Gu Chaoming thought he had come to the future, the future where they lived together.
Although there was only time for one meal, Gu Chaoming still cherished it. He never thought that he would get the right to return to the same home with Lin Jianfan in his third year of high school.
When he walked to the door of his house, Lin Jianfan was waiting for him at the door, but he didn't open the door. When Gu Chaoming came up, Lin Jianfan urged him to hurry up.
The key was inserted into the keyhole, the door opened, and Lin Jianfan jumped into the room, took off his shoes and put on soft cotton slippers.
Gu Chaoming kept walking behind him, watching his exceptionally detached back today, closed the door and put the yogurt in the refrigerator.
"I still want to drink a bottle." Putting down his schoolbag, Lin saw Fan Xiao running over and standing in front of the unclosed refrigerator door.
"I have to eat later." Gu Chaoming acted as a villain and closed the refrigerator.
Lin Jianfan was instantly lost, his shoulders were shrugged, yogurt was like a continuation agent for his excitement, and without yogurt, Lin Jianfan's escape was gone.
Gu Chaoming, who closed the refrigerator door, sighed slightly inaudibly: "Then drink another bottle."
When he heard that he could drink another bottle, Lin Jianfan's eyes immediately lit up, regaining his vitality.
It's really unprincipled, Gu Chaoming laughed to himself.
Open the refrigerator, help Lin Jianfan break out a box of yogurt, insert a straw and hand it to him.
Lin Jianfan happily drank the yogurt, and the milky yogurt entered Lin Jianfan's mouth through a transparent straw. Gu Chaoming threw away the plastic packaging that wrapped the straw in his hand, hung up his apron and walked into the kitchen to prepare for cooking.
After scooping up an appropriate amount of rice, he went to the sink to wash the rice, and after Gu Chaoming agreed to drink another bottle of yogurt, Lin Jianfan walked into the kitchen with the yogurt.
The water washed the rice grains, and when he heard Lin Jianfan walking into the kitchen, Gu Chaoming turned his head and asked, "What's wrong?"
Lin Jianfan walked over without saying a word and stopped in front of Gu Chaoming.
"You sit, you don't need to help today..."
Gu Chaoming, who was talking, suddenly stopped and looked at Lin Jianfan's face in front of him. The slightly dry lips in winter were stained with the aroma of yogurt in Lin Jianfan's mouth.
Gu Chaoming in front of the sink was stunned, the water kept washing the rice grains.
"It's a little cold in your mouth."
When Lin Jianfan got up, he could hear his heart beating as if he had just gone upstairs.
Looking at Gu Chaoming who was cooking in the kitchen in the living room, Lin Jianfan didn't think about how to explain the kiss he suddenly wanted to ask for. He just walked into the kitchen just like that. He felt that his mouth was cold after drinking the yogurt. Seeing Gu Chaoming's figure in the kitchen, he wanted to ask for some warmth in his mouth.
When I walked into the kitchen, I didn't think much about it. After the kiss, it was natural to say "it's a little cold in my mouth".
Xu Shi's words awakened Lin Jianfan, who was too happy today, and made him return to the shyness of the past.
I seem to be too excited today.
After the kiss, Lin Jianfan stood there dumbfounded, with no momentum at all when he kissed.
He seemed to be drifting a bit, but when Gu Chaoming allowed him to drink two bottles of yogurt that he could not normally drink today, he began to drift.
Gu Chaoming looked at Lin Jianfan who became shy after walking into the kitchen with confidence and kissing him, he knew that Lin Jianfan was happy.
Lin Jianfan's happiness subsided, and he wanted to go back to the living room. Looking at Gu Chaoming's face in front of him, Lin Jianfan's shyness couldn't be restrained like his joy.
Lin Jianfan wanted to escape back to the living room, but Gu Chaoming didn't give him a chance, grabbed him, and dragged him back who wanted to escape.
The taste of yogurt in the mouth was transmitted, and the yogurt box in his hand fell to the ground. Lin Jianfan's cotton-padded clothes were attached to the water-soaked sink, and the kitchen was quiet. Apart from the noisy water, there was only the sound of Lin Jianfan and Gu Chaoming's slow-to-hurt breathing. The sound of breathing could not suppress the sound of the yogurt taste in his mouth, Lin Jianfan closed his eyes and felt the temperature of Gu Chaoming's neck.
The sound of the water flowing in the sink changed, and the two people by the sink didn't notice it for a while. Gu Chaoming, who knew how to cook, was the first to notice. After letting go of Lin Jianfan, he hurriedly turned off the water that had been thrown out. Lin Jianfan stood on the side and tried to help, but he couldn't help, so he could only stand aside and watch Gu Chaoming. laugh.
Gu Chaoming raised his wet palms and bounced water at Lin Jianfan who was standing by the sink smiling, Lin Jianfan smiled and avoided.
Gu Chaoming pushed Lin Jianfan with his wet elbow and pushed him away from the kitchen: "Don't make trouble, go watch TV, we'll be late later."
Lin Jianfan pouted, as the first of the grade, he was a bit willful and wanted to be late today.
This is the normal state of their senior year of high school life. Too much happiness makes Gu Chaoming often feel that there is a clear dividing line with his life for the past ten years.
The line of demarcation is blurred, but it separates two completely different lives. One is an endless hell, and at the end is a prison that never ends. One is the present with Lin Jianfan.
The two extremes are like the north and south poles of the earth. Gu Chaoming's north and south poles are connected together and separated by a vague dividing line.
Gu Chaoming didn't know when his life changed to the way he is now immersed in sweetness all day long. Maybe it was the day he was with Lin Jianfan, or the day Gu Tao disappeared from his life. Maybe, maybe it was the day he met Lin Jianfan.
In the summer when he met Lin Jianfan, his life quietly changed.
Saturday was not particularly favored by winter, the air was as cold as usual, the cold wind was blowing as usual, and even the temperature dropped a few degrees with shame.
After making an appointment to go to the library with Lin Jianfan to review, Gu Chaoming put on his schoolbag and changed his shoes at the entrance. He opened the door and received the message that Lin Jianfan was out.
It was cold in winter. There was a long road opposite the library. Gu Chaoming was waiting for Lin Jianfan beside the traffic light.
Lin Jianfan was a person who was punctual and could not be persuaded by Gu Chaoming, but he arrived surprisingly late today.
Holding a hot drink in his hand, he bought it for Lin Jianfan who was cold on the road to warm his body.
Standing on the side of the road and waiting for a minute, the phone vibrated, and Gu Chaoming took out his phone.
is a photo.
A picture of a dog.
The dog in the photo is very old, and Gu Chaoming, who doesn't know the dog, can see that it is very old, and it is too old to look like it.
The sender of the photo was Lin Jianfan. When he saw the photo, Gu Chaoming thought of the dead Guoguo that Lin Jianfan was crying about in his arms that night.
Thinking of Lin Jianfan's tears that night, Guoguo was very important to him, and Gu Chaoming froze, afraid that Lin Jianfan thought of Guoguo because he saw this dog.
Looking at the background behind the photo, it was on the side of the road that Gu Chaoming knew. It should have been taken by Lin Jianfan himself, on the way to the library.
The dog was sticking to Lin Jianfan's side without making any trouble at all, allowing Lin Jianfan to pet it.
Gu Chaoming was afraid that Lin Jianfan's next message would be "This dog looks like Guoguo".
He also wanted to know what Guoguo, who made Lin Jianfan cry in his arms, looked like, but he didn't want Lin Jianfan to tell him.
Maybe Lin Jianfan could talk to him about Guoguo to prove that he really let go of Guoguo's death, but Gu Chaoming was afraid that what he was waiting for would be the same crying like last time.
Gu Chaoming stood by the roadside with a hot drink and waited for Lin Jianfan.
He looked at the direction that Lin Jianfan would appear in front of him, and he hoped and believed that the life of continuous progress would not let Lin Jianfan stay in place.
Lin Jianfan will move forward with life.
After waiting for Lin to see Fan, Gu Chaoming would hand him a hot cup of hot drink, smiled and said to him, "Go in."
He waited for Lin Jianfan, the hot drink in his hand was hot in the winter, and he waited for Lin Jianfan who appeared at that intersection.
As soon as Lin Jianfan appeared in front of him, Gu Chaoming immediately walked to the zebra crossing with a hot drink, ready to pick him up.
The green light turned red, preventing Gu Chaoming's footsteps and Lin Jianfan's footsteps from crossing the road.
They were separated by a red light at both ends of the road, with traffic in between.
Across the zebra crossing, Lin Jianfan saw Gu Chaoming who couldn't wait on the other side of the road. Gu Chaoming saw Lin Jianfan smiling at him across the road.
Gu Chaoming also laughed, and when the red light turned green, Gu Chaoming immediately ran across the zebra crossing, as if he was afraid that he would not be able to keep up with the smile on Lin Jianfan's face.
When Lin Jianfan walked off the zebra crossing, Gu Chaoming ran to him and stopped, his hot drink swaying slightly.
They met on the zebra crossing, Gu Chaoming handed the hot drink to Lin Jianfan, and accompanied Lin Jianfan to walk back to the other side of the road from which he ran.
On the other side of the road, Lin Jianfan asked, "Why are you still running here?"
Gu Chaoming said: "I'm afraid that the hot drink will be cold, and I'm afraid that you will walk too slowly. I miss you so much."
The hot drink in his mouth was a little hot, and it was hot in Lin Jianfan's heart.
Lin Jianfan did meet an old-fashioned dog on the road, and the dog really looked like Guoguo, but he didn't cry anymore because he thought of Guoguo.
On the way to the library, he just looked at the dog lying on the side of the road. The dog stared at him with indifferent eyes, and Lin Jianfan could no longer move. He didn't see what Guoguo looked like when he died. He was still in school when Guoguo died, and only received a call from his family saying that Guoguo died.
He didn't know that the hair was still shiny and the collar was hanging around his neck. It was obvious that the domestic dog was abandoned or lost, or he was about to die and chose to run away from the house.
Lin Jianfan stood there for a long time, he couldn't move, and even tried to walk slowly to touch it, like touching Guoguo, who was not with him until the last moment.
The old dog was very well behaved, motionless, Lin Jianfan didn't bark when he approached it, he just stared at Lin Jianfan who was walking towards him, and it still looked at him the same way when Lin Jianfan approached.
"What's your name?" Lin Jianfan, who had successfully approached, talked to the old dog.
The old dog did not speak to him but allowed him to approach.
Lin Jianfan tried to pet it, it was very obedient, neither screaming nor biting.
Quiet and quiet like an old man who is too lazy to talk.
"Did you feel something?" Lin Jianfan helped him talk to him smoothly, maybe in the eyes of passers-by he looked like a lunatic.
He also felt it the day he went to school, but he didn't have time to care. Guoguo felt that he was dying, so he ignored him when he left that day, and came over to lick his palm when he went out.
The past cannot be recalled, and when I recall the past unconsciously, my eyes are moist, and my heart is sour.
This is better than mentioning Guoguo crying in Gu Chaoming's arms before, but Lin Jianfan still thinks it's better not to be sad. Gu Chaoming once said to him that night: "If Guoguo sees you being so sad for it, it will also be very sad."
He didn't want to forget Guoguo, he just wanted to stop being sad when he recalled Guoguo, and let the grief stay in the past forever.
"Mao Mao, Mao Mao..."
An old man with a dog leash ran on the sidewalk next to him. He has gray hair but looks healthy, energetic, and his face is a little anxious, and he keeps shouting: "Maomao, Mao Mao..."
The lying dog suddenly purred.
"Maomao?" Lin Jianfan also tried to call out, "Your name is Mao Mao?"
Lin Jianfan guessed right, the old man was the owner of the dog, and Mao Mao was its name.
The old man ran out of breath, panting and stopped beside Lin Jianfan. The dog named Mao Mao stood up by himself and approached the running old man, and circled slowly around him.
The old man stroked its head and put the dog leash on it to prevent it from running. After hanging the dog leash, the old man glanced at Lin Jianfan who was squatting beside Mao Mao.
The old man didn't speak, Lin Jianfan said first, "Can I take a picture of it?"
Strange young man, the old man looked at Lin Jianfan and felt that this man should like dogs, but his dog was so old, he was the only one who liked it and wanted to take pictures.
It felt strange that the old man still nodded in agreement with him to take pictures.
Lin Jianfan took out his phone and took a picture, which was then displayed on Gu Chaoming's phone screen.
Lin Jianfan also took the opportunity to touch the old dog again, rubbing the top of its head, hoping that it would come to lick the palm of his hand.
But it doesn't.
It doesn't come to lick his palm to say goodbye to him like Guoguo, it just turns its head and is led by the old man to go home together, walking farther and farther in Lin Jianfan's line of sight.
Lin Jianfan, who was parked in the same place, stood up, turned his palm over and looked at his own. Guoguo had licked there, when he was about to leave home, when it was about to leave this world.
At that time, Lin Jianfan looked back helplessly, but now Lin Jianfan watched it go away helplessly.
He asked the old man if he could take a picture of it himself.
He is not nostalgic, he is saying goodbye.
Say goodbye to Guoguo who left him, say goodbye to the pain of the past.
Goodbye, fruit.
Goodbye, past.
When Lin Jianfan walked to the side of the road, the red light blocked his pace.
He stood on the other side of the road and looked at Gu Chaoming who wanted to cross the road to pick him up but was also blocked by the red light.
Lin Jianfan laughed.
Hello, Gu Chaoming.