As if it was sealed, the cold and turbid river water was filled with breath, and the exhaled breath turned into bubbles, which rose to the surface of the river and burst and disappeared without anyone knowing.
His hands instinctively kept waving, but his body kept sinking.
The air bubbles are getting fewer and fewer, the breath taken away by the river water.
On the riverside with messy footprints in winter, the warm sun shone brightly, illuminating the panicked faces of several people on the bank.
"Brother Zhan, he fell, what should I do?" one of them said in fear.
"What does it have to do with me when he fell by himself?" Brother Zhan said in a hurry, and quickly cleared the relationship, feeling a little flustered in his heart. It's a personal thing to fall, and he doesn't want to get involved in a murder for avenging a cousin.
The younger brothers were still watching, if he showed panic, where would he put his face? Cao Zhan pretended to be calm and looked at Lin Jianfan, who was still thumping in the river.
"Wouldn't he if he drowned us..."
"Qiu Cheng, shut up for me! If you don't speak, no one will treat you as dumb."
Qiu Cheng who was talking was his cousin and the one who was punched in the face by Lin Jianfan that night. Cao Zhan secretly scolded himself for this cousin who was not good at doing anything, and who made trouble for him.
Qiu Cheng has been accustomed to his family since he was a child. Don't look at others as tall and sturdy. In fact, their courage is only the size of an eyeball.
"What should I do?!" Qiu Cheng anxiously asked his cousin Cao Zhan.
Cao Zhan was upset by Qiu Cheng's quarrel, and couldn't help yelling at his usual cousin Qiu Cheng: "How do I know? It's not to help you. Don't hum, be careful I'll push you too. Go down with him!"
One thing fell another thing, Qiu Cheng was the king at school at home, and he stopped as soon as he encountered the tougher Cao Zhan.
The two friends next to him saw Qiu Cheng, who claimed to be the school bully, so cowardly in front of Cao Zhan, and exchanged glances. Qiu Cheng turned his head and glared at them both menacingly.
Qiu Cheng is afraid that Cao Zhan is not without reason. Cao Zhan's family is divorced and is a single-parent family. His mother doesn't care about him either, she is completely free-range. As soon as he finished junior high school, he did not continue his studies, nor did he look for a job, but messed around everywhere, becoming what their parents said, "If you don't study hard, you will become like Cao Zhan."
It's not that Cao Zhan didn't find a relationship with him, and hoped that he would go to a vocational high school. The money was spent, but Cao Zhan was dead.
In the eyes of his parents, Cao Zhan is a complete bastard, but in the eyes of Qiu Cheng, who often played with him when he was a child, Cao Zhan is his eldest brother.
Cao Zhan also pointed his thumb at himself and said to Qiu Cheng: "Someone bullies you at school, you tell Brother Zhan, Brother Zhan will kill him for you."
As promised, now Cao Zhan has sent the people who "bullied" Qiu Cheng into the river.
Qiu Cheng even felt that death was approaching Lin Jianfan step by step, he hummed again, and was scolded by Cao Zhan again.
"You're still humming! Shut me up!"
After asking Qiu Cheng to stop the noise, Cao Zhan asked if the two buddies he brought with him knew how to use water? Both shook their heads. Cao Zhan asked Qiu Cheng, who I don't know if they were two brothers or two younger brothers: "Are you two able to swim? Go down and fish, the water is not deep."
Both of them shook their heads, and Qiu Cheng stabbed him timidly at this time: "Brother Zhan, aren't you good at swimming?"
When he was a child, he sneaked into the river to take a bath. Qiu Cheng almost drowned, but Cao Zhan rescued him.
The water is so deep, it must be very cold in the winter, and the river is not very clean, so Cao Zhan didn't want to go down, and would rather tell others not to go down, even though life was at stake.
Qiu Cheng knew what kind of person his cousin was. He stole money from his family's mother's insurance to play. He was lazy and lazy. He didn't care about his relatives, but his loyalty to friends and brothers was more important than his life.
In Cao Zhan's heart, there is face that can be compared with loyalty.
Qiu Cheng exposed the fact that he could swim, and Cao Zhan said, "I just want someone to help me. It's impossible for me to go down alone, right?"
After speaking to save a little face, Cao Zhan said righteously: "You few cowards will come to me to meet up, I will go down and catch him up, and I have to play at the critical moment."
This winter is really cold, winter water can be imagined ice. The ice water irritates the skin. In order to be handsome, Cao Zhan only wears a thin padded jacket in winter with a single shirt inside.
The icy river water made Cao Zhan curse Qiu Cheng again in his heart.
Just as he was scolding, he approached Lin Jianfan, who was gradually unable to flutter. Qiu Cheng on the shore shouted to him anxiously: "Brother Zhan, hurry up, Lin Jianfan seems to be dying! Hurry up!"
He doesn't want to lose his freedom because of this, he will have to take the college entrance examination next year.
Seeing the fluttering Lin Jianfan disappeared and looked like he was drowning, Qiu Cheng shouted even more anxiously: "Brother Zhan, hurry up, he... he seems to be drowning!"
The few people next to me who couldn't swim also followed suit.
Cao Zhan's water is very good, and after a while, he swam to Lin Jianfan's side, picked up Lin Jianfan and found that Lin Jianfan was unconscious, his eyes were closed, and his head was tilted to one side.
Qiu Cheng shouted on the shore, and Cao Zhan also panicked. He's a mess, but he hasn't touched a human life for so many years!
Seeing that Lin Jianfan was unconscious, Cao Zhan didn't dare to delay, so he took Lin Jianfan and quickly swam to the shore to let Qiu Cheng and the others respond.
After saving Lin Jianfan to the shore, Cao Zhan's body flowed all over his body, and he shivered when the cold wind blew. Qiu Cheng took off his padded jacket and put it on Cao Zhan very caringly.
Pulling the person ashore, Qiu Cheng stood beside him and did nothing but put on Cao Zhan's coat. A classmate next to him reacted and immediately pressed Lin Jianfan's chest.
He hadn't listened to it carefully in class, and according to his vague memory, he helped Lin Jianfan to do chest compressions, and the classmate was very clueless.
Everyone omits artificial respiration by default, staring at the people who are giving Lin Jianfan chest compressions. No breathing could be heard at the scene, as if the mute button was pressed for them in winter, only Qiu Cheng hummed anxiously.
Everyone dared not breathe, and the classmates who performed chest compressions on Lin Jianfan felt that they were fighting against death.
His heart was very bottomless, and the arm pressing on his chest almost trembled.
When the winter wind passed by Ling Lie, a special mobile phone ringtone was sent to break the tranquility.
The special cell phone ringtone came from Lin Jianfan's phone. Cao Zhan went down to save people and threw Lin Jianfan's cell phone to his companion.
"Fuck, it's that little sun again, who is it?" Cao Zhan said as he took the phone.
"Would you like to pick it up? Lin Jianfan is like this." Another companion of Qiu Cheng asked.
"Take a fart, just because he is like this, so you can't pick it up. Picking up doesn't mean you're throwing yourself into the net." Cao Zhan said.
"Then hit 120?"
"Wait and fight again to see if this kid can do it." Cao Zhan, who was soaked in the cold wind and wrapped in Qiu Cheng's coat, looked at the person who pressed Lin Jianfan's chest.
"Can you do it?" Qiu Cheng said anxiously.
The man couldn't stand Qiu Cheng, so he said directly, "You can do it, don't tell me what to say."
As soon as he finished speaking, Lin Jianfan spit out a mouthful of water under the palm of his hand, and the man opened his mouth in surprise.
Everyone breathed a sigh of relief instantly.
"It's good not to die, it's good to not die."
"Can he still do it?" Cao Zhan asked the person who performed chest compressions on Lin Jianfan.
"It looks like it should work." The man patted Lin Jianfan's face, trying to wake him up.
"Leave." When Lin saw Fan just spit out a sip of water, Cao Zhan zipped Qiu Cheng's jacket and told them to leave.
"Ah?" Qiu Cheng and his two friends were stunned and looked at Cao Zhan questioningly.
"But... he..."
"You're still waiting for him to wake up and see that you're going to settle accounts with you? He doesn't know you, right? Does he have any information about you?" Cao Zhan asked.
Qiu Cheng shook his head, if it wasn't for the student ID card that fell out of Lin Jianfan's pocket that night, there would be no such thing at all.
"That's fine, he can't do anything if he doesn't know you, so let's go quickly." Cao Zhan said.
Qiu Cheng and his friends looked at each other, listened to Cao Zhan's words and left the scene.
Several people hurriedly fled from the river bank, and before escaping, they remembered to put Lin Jianfan's mobile phone in his hand.
The teenagers who disappeared by the river bank left only Lin Jianfan, who was soaked all over, sleeping peacefully there. The cold wind blew across the river without disappearing or escaping, and woke up Lin Jianfan who was asleep on the river bank.
The banks of the river were so desolate that no one found even drowning. His head was very heavy, and his whole body was numb from the cold. Lin Jianfan sat up with his arms that seemed to be rusted, tapped the heavy head, and shook the water droplets from his hair.
With cold limbs, Lin Jianfan looked around.
He was rescued.
The moment he fell, he thought he would never see the warm winter sun again.
The cold wind was rampant, and Lin saw Fan's legs curled up and hugged him tightly. He sat alone on the bank of the river and looked around, not knowing what to do.
The residual water accumulated in the padded clothes made the padded clothes heavy, and there was not a trace of warmth in the whole body. The heart that had been warmed by Gu Chaoming was once again soaked and cold by the river water.
He thought everything was going in a good direction, he thought he could spend his life with Gu Chaoming like this, he thought he could get a new student by staying away from his previous school.
It turns out that school violence cannot be changed by changing schools.
Just when he thought everything was fine and there was room for improvement in his life, reality slapped him again.
You see, the distant place you are looking forward to is still rampant with violence, it's just a different place and some people, and nothing else has changed.
The distance he reached was the same but different from what he thought at first, only Gu Chaoming was an accident.
Lin Jianfan felt that he was blinded by Gu Chaoming's warmth, thinking that everyone in the world was good, just like Gu Chaoming, and that the violence he had endured in the past was just a special feature of his fate.
Now he understood: "It turned out to be unbelievable."
The river bank is wide, and in the cold wind, Lin saw Fan sitting quietly by the river bank. He didn't know what to do or where to go. He just sat like this, enjoying the cold wind by the river bank.
The special bell rang again, and Little Sun's expression appeared on the phone screen again. Lin Jianfan picked up the phone beside him and saw the little sun on the phone.
That was his note to Gu Chaoming.
Gu Chaoming is the warm sun in the night sky, a beautiful dream that could be met but not sought after before he escaped and came to the distant place he imagined.
The winter wind dries the eyelashes wet by the river water, and the tears moisten it again. Lin Jianfan looked at the little sun on his mobile phone, and then looked up at the warm winter sun above his head that finally appeared this winter.
All so warm.
Whether it was the warm sun above his head or Gu Chaoming who called him.
He is just a person with the name of "Blossoming Flowers", he does not have such a world and does not have such a life.
He answered the phone, and the anxious shout on the other end brought the flowery world to him in the winter.
"See Fan? Why did you answer the phone? Where are you? I called you many times and didn't answer. What happened to you?"
After a few questions, Lin Jianfan raised his head. He no longer raised his head because he was looking at the warm sun above his head, but because he wanted to hold back the tears that Gu Chaoming's warmth brought him.
"I'm fine, if I have anything to do, I accidentally stepped on the water when I went to get my student ID, slipped and got wet. I forgot to turn off the mute on my phone, and I only heard your call now."
Lin Jianfan didn't know when his lies would advance by leaps and bounds, and he didn't need a pause to successfully deceive Gu Chaoming.
Maybe Gu Chaoming never doubted what he said, and he believed it all. When he heard Lin saw Fan fall, Gu Chaoming asked anxiously, "Fall? Be careful when walking, where did you not fall?"
"No," Lin Jianfan said, "how can I fall when I wear it so thick in winter, and the clothes get dirty. I want to go home and change it. Please help me take a leave of absence for Lao Chen. I want to be lazy in the afternoon. Take a rest at home, don't tell Lao Chen, just tell him I fell."
Lin Jianfan also learned to pretend to use laughter to deceive Gu Chaoming. He didn't want Gu Chaoming to worry, nor did he want Gu Chaoming to know his past.
Gu Chaoming said that he was lazy, said he would take a leave of absence, and asked him to rest well before he caught a cold. Before hanging up, he asked, "Do you want me to take you back?"
"No, I'll change clothes without sending them."
Gu Chaoming asked again and again, Lin Jianfan pretended to answer with a smile.
The phone hangs up, the cold wind picks up again, and the beep of the phone hangs up by the river, on the riverbank.
Tears fell from the corners of his eyes.
Hanging up the phone, Lin Jianfan held the phone in his palm. In the lie, he went home to change his clothes, but where should he go in reality
He didn't want anyone to worry about him, didn't want Gu Chaoming to worry about him, didn't want to worry about Lao Chen who knew what happened in his previous school and took care of him everywhere, didn't want to worry about his good brother Li Zhao, didn't want to be good to him Su Binghe Cen Xili was worried.
I don't want to worry my parents.
He deceived his parents just to make them stop quarreling, and he carried all the memories by himself, just to make them as loving as before.
The mother has shed too many tears for him, the father has worried too much for him, he is an unfilial son and can't do anything to help them.
He wanted to go home, he wanted to rush into his mother's arms and cry and tell her everything that had just happened, that someone was bullying your son, but he couldn't, he could only wander aimlessly and wander the streets.
He didn't dare to go to crowded places, he was afraid that pedestrians would come to care for him when they saw his soaked cotton clothes, and that their concern would cause his parents to worry.
He was afraid to see his mother's worried expression.
There were too many people on the street, and Lin Jianfan suddenly remembered what Gu Chaoming said in the night when he took Gu Chaoming to flee, he would not let Gu Chaoming hug him.
"Then I'll take you to a place where no one is."
Gu Chaoming took his hand and led him to the river bank.
Gu Chaoming's secret base.
Gu Chaoming has two secret bases, one is by the river bank, and the other is the seaside that he took him to on his birthday.
The river bank was too close to Gu Chaoming's house, so he was afraid of meeting Gu Tao. Gu Chaoming at the seaside said that the sea breeze and waves could take away his troubles, and Lin Jianfan relied on the route he remembered to catch the car to the seaside.
Sitting on the seat next to the bus window, there are no people on the bus in the afternoon, and the heating in the bus makes the wet cotton-padded clothes more uncomfortable.
Lin Jianfan didn't care, he looked out the window, watching the changing scenery outside the window.
The last time I went was in summer, and it was already winter in the blink of an eye. Then the sea breeze was blowing, what will it be like now
Lin Jianfan looked out the window as if he was talking to the scenery outside the window, and asked them about the seaside situation.
He wants to hide himself, no one can find out, no one has to worry about him.
He was talking to the scenery outside the window, and he hoped that someone could chat with him and share his pain.
From the morning when he told his mother that he didn't remember, he pretended to be cheerful with all the painful memories of the past, and he also wanted someone to say to him: "You are so tired, tell me."
"Don't be afraid, I'm with you."
Gu Chaoming said something similar to him. Yesterday, in the school toilet after meeting Zhu Shengquan, Gu Chaoming hugged him and comforted him.
"I don't know what happened, but I know you're very unhappy right now. It doesn't matter if you don't want to say it, and I won't think about it. I just want to tell you, don't hold it back alone, I'm always here."
I am here.
He still didn't say it, he was timid and cowardly, and only dared to escape alone, to the seaside.
Gu Chaoming dared to speak out the sin in his heart, but he did not dare, he was a cowardly person.
Lin Jian Fan felt a little dizzy from the heat of the air conditioner. He knew that he would catch a cold if he went on like this, but he kept going.
The bus slowly and leisurely carried him forward, and Gu Chaoming from the school asked him for leave without knowing it.
The classroom is quiet, the classroom doors are closed, and the cold air is locked out.
The wind whistled by the sea, and the golden sunlight fell into the winter sea, like being swallowed up by the sea.
Gu Chaoming listened attentively, took notes in his hand holding the pen, thinking of going home and taking pictures for Lin Jianfan to see.
Lin Jianfan walked to the beach, the waves were rushing, and his half-dry hair was swaying in the wind.
After class, Gu Chaoming fought with Su Bing, and ate snacks that Cen Xili bought together. After eating, he paid attention to You Xin who was walking by the window, and the eye contact between You Xin and Cen Xili.
Lin Jianfan was standing by the sea, and the sea came up to kiss his ankle. The shoes were soaked and the waves surged again. Lin Jianfan jumped into the surging waves just like Gu Chaoming's birthday last time.
After school, Gu Chaoming sent a message to Lin Jianfan at the door of the milk tea shop outside the school. Lin Jianfan said at noon that he would sleep first. Gu Chaoming did not dare to send him a message in the afternoon in order not to disturb his sleep until after school. I asked him if he was awake. Su Bing handed him milk tea, and Gu Chaoming said goodbye to Cen Xili, who was riding a bicycle.
On the seaside where the wind was howling, he sat all afternoon, letting the sea breeze blow through. The seaside in winter is cold but quiet.
Lin Jianfan sat there alone, no one was disturbed, no one was curious. He just sat quietly. He imagined what Gu Chaoming said to shout out all his troubles and let the sea breeze take them away, but standing by the sea, standing in front of the sea breeze, he didn't know what to shout. All the pain and memories seem to never end in a single sentence or paragraph, not even an article. No words could carry his mood at this time.
The warm sun and white snow on the side of the road, the teenagers on the way home fight each other, want to try the taste of each other's milk tea, but dislike each other's saliva.
Lin Jianfan shouted at the whistling sea breeze on the cold wind on the beach.
He only shouted.
"Go to hell with me!"