Mu Nanzhi took a sip of tea and said with some difficulty: "Jing'an, I'm afraid it will make you unhappy. If the Queen Mother collapses, how will you deal with it? Is it possible that you really want the Qingdeng Ancient Buddha? End this life?"
Princess Jing'an was silent. She looked at the falling snowflakes outside the window, feeling a little confused. Yes, is it possible that she really wants the Ancient Buddha of Qingdeng to end her life
She did not believe in gods and Buddhas, but she could only serve the Buddha with the Queen Mother, out of self-protection and to find peace, but in the final analysis, it was just self-deception.
But besides serving the Buddha, what else can she do
She is in such an embarrassing status and situation, and now she still has the Queen Mother as her backer. If the Queen Mother is gone, her life will be even more difficult, right
Mu Nanzhi carefully looked at the side face of Princess Jing'an, and after a while he whispered: "Jing'an, have you ever thought about going back to Korea? Although I am very reluctant to let you go, I also want you to live a comfortable and smooth life. When you return to Goryeo, you are still a princess. I heard that your mother-in-law is very favored. Naturally, you have a place in the Goryeo royal family, which is better than staying at Dali Qingdeng Ancient Buddha."
"Do you think I don't want to go back? But I can't go back," Princess Jing'an suddenly smiled bitterly. She lowered her head and took a sip of tea. The tea was a little cold, but the bitterness of the Pu'er was even worse. She looked at it and it was a bit bitter. In the turbid tea soup, he said slowly, "As soon as something happened to Prince Kang's palace, I wrote a letter and sent it back to Goryeo, asking my father to send someone to take me back to Goryeo. However, my father asked me to stay safe in Dali and stay safe for the rest of my life. Don’t think about Goryeo anymore.”
Mu Nanzhi was a little frustrated: "How could this happen? Doesn't he know your situation? Doesn't he know what kind of life you are living?"
"He knows, but he also knows that it is not worth negotiating with Dali for a concubine like me. Instead, it is better for me to serve the Queen Mother to gain Dali's favor." Princess Jing'an laughed at herself, "I used to I was so arrogant that I didn't take anyone seriously, but then I realized that I was nothing. Didn't even my parents take me seriously? How could I expect others to look up to me? I really learned to keep myself in peace and started to read scriptures calmly. Fortunately, the Queen Mother is not strict. "
"But, do you still have to think about yourself? The Queen Mother can't protect you forever after all," Mu Nanzhi was heartbroken and blurted out without even thinking, "Jing'an, would you like to move to our palace in the future?"
As soon as the words fell, both of them were startled. Mu Nanzhi knew that he had made a mistake, and he was not the princess of Jing'an but a noble princess of the first rank. How could he live under the roof of another person? Moreover, Princess Jing'an was a widow after all, so living with them like this would inevitably lead to many rumors.
Princess Jing'an didn't expect so much. She was very moved. She held Mu Nanzhi's hand and choked up a little: "Anle, I thank you, but I can't agree."
Mu Nanzhi didn't speak anymore, but she felt even more uncomfortable. She patted Princess Jing'an's hand, paused, and then said: "It would be great if we could live closer, so that we could take care of each other." ”
~~~~~~~~~~
After Lu Zhishan, Mu Nanzhi and Princess Jing'an finished their meals in the dining room, Lu Zhishan ordered Du Heng to take Princess Jing'an back to the palace. Mu Nanzhi was a little tired and followed Lu Zhishan Went back to the backyard to rest.