Knowing is one thing, seeing it with your own eyes is another.
It turned out that he was really so ill, Zhang Man only felt that his heart was cut back and forth with a dull knife, and the feeling of heartache was overwhelming, and she had no resistance.
In the midst of endless loneliness, apart from his mother Lin Hui, he even fantasized about another friend.
This kind of life, when she didn't know it, he lived for so many years.
Soon, the boy came back. He seemed to be in a good mood. He seemed to have discussed a very important issue with his "friend" just now.
Zhang Man tried his best to calm down, stood up, and squeezed out a stiff smile.
Fortunately, the boy didn't notice at all.
"Zhang Man, why are you here? Didn't you have a rehearsal today?"
After hearing his question, she realized that maybe he had been "discussing" just now from the 6th to now, so even the time was blurred.
No wonder he looked so tired.
She took a deep breath and tried to calm herself down, with a bit of anger in her tone: "Hmph, what a rehearsal, didn't you see it, I'm done performing."
The boy looked slightly surprised and glanced at the date on his watch.
He shook hands, lowered his head, and said in a low voice, "... I talked to Nick for so long that I forgot the time, and I thought it was the sixth today."
There was obviously some guilt and remorse in his voice.
Zhang Man pretended to be a little angry, turned around and ignored him, but he was still thinking about what happened just now.
The teenager walked over with his head lowered, leaned down and looked at her, and asked softly, "You... did the performance go well?"
"You didn't see whether it went well or not."
The boy looked at her indifferent appearance, and a burst of annoyance surged in his heart, he clenched his fist lightly.
If I had known, I would never have asked Nick to meet on the 6th, but we talked for so long that I missed her performance.
She clearly agreed to go, but she missed the appointment, so she couldn't wait for someone to find her home.
She must be disappointed in herself, right? So in the future, wouldn't she want to find him again
The boy lowered his head and looked at the girl in front of him.
The way she looks today is well-dressed, bursting with amazing beauty.
The girl's high-rolled long hair made her neck more slender and beautiful, and the black high-slit dress with dark lines showed her figure, making her look a few years more mature than before.
—The barren physical formulas in his mind were completely unable to describe her beauty.
At this moment, Li Wei even felt as if two accelerated high-energy particles collided in his heart.
In a certain corner of the heart, an irreversible qualitative change has occurred.
The heartbeat starts to get out of control, as does the mind.
He couldn't help thinking, she must be shining on stage today, even more beautiful than now.
The boy's gaze moved down, and his attention was attracted by the bouquet she was holding.
Her skin was almost transparent, her snow-skinned hair was black, and the pure white lily bouquet made her whole person seem a little holy, like an angel who did not belong to the world.
There is a completely unfamiliar emotion that begins in the heart and spreads throughout the body with the flow of blood, as if accidentally eating an underripe orange.
— He damnedly missed her beauty, but the others didn't. There must be many people who were amazed by her, such as the owner of this bouquet.
These unfamiliar emotions dominated his words, and he pretended to ask casually, "Is this flower... from the audience?... Is it a boy?"
Zhang Man was still immersed in the scene just now, and casually responded: "Well."
When the boy got the answer, he stood there without speaking for a long time. The incomparably strange emotions were even worse than before, sweeping through his whole body, making him not know how to deal with it.
The room was suddenly quiet, and Zhang Man came back to his senses.
Looking at his expression, she thought he was guilty of missing the appointment, so she smiled and patted his shoulder: "Li Wei, I'm not angry, I'm joking with you. Have you been breathless for days? Do you want to go out for a walk?"
The teenager nodded: "Wait for me, I'll take a shower and change my clothes."
—
The two followed the road in front of Li Wei's house and walked to the beach.
The sea facing his house faces west, and the sunset can still be seen at this moment. Layers of red clouds spread all over the junction between the sea horizon and the sky. Pieces of seagulls parked on the shore. Some people walked by and were so frightened that they flew up and circled in the sky.
Evening is the best time to take a walk. The sun is not poisonous, the temperature is not cold, and the humid air by the sea has a salty smell.
The two walked side by side on the soft sand, enjoying the gentle evening breeze.
Since everyone has their own concerns, they have been walking quietly without speaking.
Zhang Man is trying to recall all the details of Li Wei's illness just now, thinking that he must write it down when he goes home later, so that he can consult a doctor later.
And Li Wei was thinking about the bunch of flowers.
Who sent it? Is it someone she knows? She accepted the flowers, what does it mean...
He thought about it for a while, but couldn't get an answer. The thirst for knowledge in his heart made him want to ask clearly, but he couldn't open his mouth.
The genius boy, who is usually very good at thinking and has a keen insight, is in trouble at this moment. He didn't know what was wrong with him, why he was so interested in a small bunch of flowers, which surpassed the physical problem he just hadn't figured out.
why.
However, this question is almost unsolvable for someone like him who grew up close to autism.
Finally, Zhang Man broke the silence: "Li Wei, let's go over there. I'll sing for you, okay? Just sing the song I performed today."
This song was sung for him, how could he be absent.
The young man nodded, with rare expectation and tenderness in his eyes.
The two sat down on the golden sand, and the girl's gentle voice sounded slowly, without the accompaniment of the guitar, but with the evening sea breeze and the soft sound of the tide.
“If I should stay, I would only be in your way. So I'll go, but I know I'll think of you every step of the way…”
Sitting next to him like this, singing the song he wanted to sing to him, Zhang Man felt extremely relaxed. Everything she had just experienced, the scene that made her tremble involuntarily, was now calmed down by the tenderness in her heart.
It's alright, she's seen him when he's sick, it's not scary at all, just a little distressed. I feel sorry for him for so many years without anyone taking care of him, for his sensitive and extreme temperament, and for the small world he built for himself in his heart.
A world with friends, family, and love.
Everything related to him can pull at her heart, whether it's joy or sadness. Zhang Man realized very clearly that he had fallen in love with everything about him hopelessly.
“…I will always love you.”
I will love you forever.
At the end of the song, she looked at the boy listening quietly beside her, but did not speak.
The boy also looked at her, applauded lightly, and said to her, "Zhang Man, close your eyes."
Zhang Man was a little puzzled, but still closed his eyes obediently.
The brief loss of vision made her hearing extremely sharp. She heard that the boy seemed to stand up, walked a few steps and came back, and then there was a rustling sound next to her.
It took about ten minutes before he let her open her eyes.
The moment Zhang Man opened his eyes, he saw the ground in front of him, covered his mouth and exclaimed in a low voice.
On the originally empty beach, there are now "roses" blooming, which are dyed a gentle warm red by the afterglow of the setting sun, and the young man stands in the sea of layers of flowers, holding one in his hand. short branches.
He raised his head to look at her, his eyes slightly curved: "Do you like it? Zhang Man, for you, you sing really well."
He painted her a rose on the beach, religiously as if writing his favorite physics formula.
The ebb tide of the sea gently slapped the shore, the sea breeze whistled softly, and the birds circled and chirped.
In the chaotic background sound, Zhang Man could clearly hear her frantic heartbeat. The strong emotion made it difficult for her to hide it at the moment. She looked at the young man in front of her and stared at his eyes almost greedily.
Emotions dominate the answer long before the brain reacts.
"Well, I like it a lot."
I like you very much.
—
The two sat and watched the sunset. On the other side of the sea, a red warm sun had a blurry border, as if someone had smudged the surrounding with watercolors, and the whole sky had that warm hue.
Zhang Man enjoyed this quiet atmosphere, and suddenly felt a heavy weight on his shoulders.
She turned her head, and it turned out that the boy was leaning on her shoulder and fell asleep.
He must be tired after not closing his eyes for two days.
He slept soundly, and the uncomfortable posture didn't hinder his rhythmic breathing at all.
He used to be close, but now he is leaning on her, and the messy hair makes her neck a little itchy. He had just taken a bath, and there was still a slight fragrance of bath liquid on his body, not the strong fragrance, but a very clean smell, which made her feel very comfortable.
Zhang Man thought about how to describe the comfortable feeling, like a quilt exposed to the sun.
She waited for him to sleep more soundly, then gently raised his head, sat back a little, and let him lie on her lap.
The teenager also seemed to be consciously looking for a more comfortable position in his sleep, moved slightly, and turned into lying on her back on her lap. When he closed his eyes, he looked really good. He didn't always have a gloomy temperament that no strangers were near as usual, but he became very peaceful.
At this time, the sun had completely set, and the temperature on the beach began to drop. Zhang Man took out the blanket he had used in the lounge in the morning from his backpack. It was big enough to wrap two people.
When the darkness of the night came, she stayed by his side and watched as a star or two began to climb up in the sky.
Her heart is very peaceful, and many times people are really not greedy, and they don't need such vigorous love or ups and downs in life. What she wants is stability. She hopes that this young man can have such a moment in his life, without worry and pain.
She just wanted to drag him back from the dead end little by little, and accompany him to watch the bright stars in the night sky in addition to the darkness.