Reason and emotion, in the spiritual life of human beings, are always two contradictory opposites.
When he left her, his reason prevailed.
However, after struggling for so many days, the moment he saw her again, his reason was gone.
Driven by fiery emotions, the original animal nature is exposed.
The boy frantically kissed the person on the apex of his heart, eagerly licking, biting, and sucking.
Her soft lips, from a dream that lasted for more than ten days, broke into reality, so sweet, so he couldn't stop.
Zhang Man was deprived of oxygen by his kiss, so he could only take his hand off her eyes, pushed him away heavily, and took a big breath with his mouth open.
Before he could take a few breaths, the young man bullied him again with dark eyes. He imprisoned her and sat on the sofa with his knees in a dangerous posture.
Zhang Man raised his hand to separate the lips of the two, and looked at him not to be outdone.
Above their heads was a huge crystal lamp. On the mahogany sofa, she sat on her back, while he knelt in front of her.
The young man was embarrassed and haggard, his eyes were stubbornly glowing with reddish water vapor, and his long eyelashes were still stained with suspicious water light.
How like a beast that hides itself in the corner of the cave, is bruised and unwilling.
He just cried.
Zhang Man's heart trembled, and he reached out to touch his eyes.
The young man stepped back alertly. She was at a loss and embarrassed, so he could only turn his head away.
Zhang Man's heart felt like a needle.
Yes, it was not easy for him to leave her. It must have been a decision made after struggling for a long time.
How did he live when she was not by his side? What kind of day can she cultivate such eyes, so that she can't see at a glance - just looking at him, her heart is like an ant bite, she just wants to listen to him, follow him with everything, and pamper him.
The boy she loves has really suffered too much.
But she couldn't be soft-hearted - if she let him go, she didn't want to experience the consequences a second time.
She knows that he is stubborn and fragile now, and the contradictions and struggles in his heart can only be broken by himself.
Zhang Man was hard-hearted, and his tone was mocking: "What? I'm not your girlfriend now, classmate Li Wei, do you want to molest me?"
"If you think that we have nothing to do, then from now on, don't touch my finger, and we will never see each other again."
She forcibly endured the pain in her heart, and she didn't give him a trace of affection, and she didn't give him the slightest retreat.
Of course, multiple-choice questions are never more than one option.
To this end, she threw out even more glamorous conditions.
"If you admit now that I'm still your girlfriend, then that kiss just now, let's continue."
After listening to the two options, the young man fell silent.
N City, which had just finished the fireworks, fell into a silence. This villa area on the mountainside, on the last day of this year, is more like a paradise away from the hustle and bustle.
In the whole house, only the two of them were breathing.
He suddenly thought of these days, the days of leaving her.
These days he was in this house, and every day in addition to thinking about her, he fell into endless delusions. These ethereal delusions seem to have been flipped on a switch since that day, and they exploded completely.
He couldn't control himself at all.
One moment it's Janet, the next it's Nick, and even sometimes when he turns his head, he'll find them standing behind him, so palpable.
He couldn't tell the difference between fantasy and reality all day and night, and occasionally when he was not awake, he even thought that he had actually been living in this house with Janet and Nick, and never got out of it.
He would even think that the school, Manman, and everything in the outside world were his illusions.
When he wakes up, he will fall into endless irritability and self-loathing.
He's just a total lunatic.
How could he be qualified to have her again? What can he bring her
-Choose it, as originally decided, never see each other again.
Never see her again. He never wanted to hurt her in his life.
After a while, the boy spoke with difficulty.
"Manman, I..."
A word stuck in his throat, like a fishbone piercing into the flesh, unable to go down or come up.
It was the same choice that day, so why can't I say it when I see her again
"What are you? You said, did we break up? You said the breakup in the email, I want to hear it from your own mouth. Say it again, what is our relationship now? If you say we are okay, it's just ordinary Classmate, I'll leave now and never leave you alone."
Zhang Man looked at the fierce struggle in his eyes, and continued to press him, never giving him the slightest chance.
The boy's eyes became darker and his Adam's apple rolled up and down.
The only bit of struggle left in his eyes was finally completely shattered after a long silence.
He could no longer deceive himself.
—There may be a trace of reason in his heart reminding him to leave her, but the trillions of cells in the body are screaming, admit it, you want her, you want her by your side.
Outnumbered.
The boy's heart twitched with pain, he sighed, hugged her weakly, and leaned his head on her neck.
finally admit it.
People are selfish, and he is not a saint.
He tore his heart in half and forced himself to leave her, but she found him so persistently, and forced him to ask him, how could he persist
The boy's voice contained seven points of pain, three points of hoarseness, and said it, like a rock on the Gobi Desert - struggling for many years, it was finally turned into sand by the hurricane in the desert.
"Manman, you are the most important person in my life."
"You... do you still want me?"
His heavy, hot breath fell on her neck.
Zhang Man finally couldn't hold back anymore.
Hearing his helpless confession, she could no longer pretend.
She raised her hand, wrapped her arms around the boy's back, and blinked a stream of hot tears from the corners of her eyes.
"So, do you choose the second one?"
She reconfirmed carefully.
The boy's head rubbed up and down between her neck and answered helplessly: "Well, the second one."
Never leave her again.
Zhang Man finally bent the corners of his lips.
Her body, which had been tense for so long, suddenly relaxed. At this moment, she actually felt the soreness of the muscles in her calf, as well as the slight itching pain from the frostbite that had been blown out by the wind two days ago.
She was really afraid just now, afraid that he would still leave her.
Dealing with him is sometimes really difficult.
"Yes, I want, as long as you choose me, I want you."
Afraid of his repentance, she nodded eagerly.
The young man raised his head, although there was still confusion and apprehension about the future in his eyes, but after she nodded, there was still a flash of ecstasy.
Zhang Man put his arms around him and faithfully fulfilled the second option.
She first kissed his eyes lightly, wiping the wetness with her lips, then lifted his chin, moved closer to him, and rested tentatively on his lips.
His lips trembled slightly, soft and honest, hard to disguise.
After an extremely short stay, the young man began to turn against customers and responded to her eagerly and enthusiastically.
The rewards for choosing the right option should be consumed without reservation.
…
When the two finally remembered to eat noodles, the noodles were already soaked and soft, and the lumps were sticking together, and the taste was extremely bad.
The bland seafood-flavored instant noodles, even the vegetable bag, was probably the worst New Year's Eve meal Zhang Man had ever eaten.
But she really walked too much today and climbed the mountain again. She had just been dealing with him for so long, and she was starving. So he didn't care whether it was delicious or not, Zhang Man frowned and finished the whole bowl before putting down his chopsticks.
She looked up at the boy who was still eating noodles.
He has been maintaining a leisurely pace, without frowning, and he doesn't seem to have any likes or dislikes for this food.
Zhang Man opened the bag he just put on the table, in addition to the bag of instant noodles he just took out, there are two other bags inside, five bags each.
I have 15 packs, and I don't know how long I want to eat.
She put down her chopsticks and leaned over to hold his hand: "Li Wei, how long have you eaten instant noodles?"
The boy looked at her seriously, but didn't lie anymore.
"Ten days."
Pretty much what she expected.
"How about two days? Eating out? Or... hungry?"
"… Um."
hungry. In the two days after he left her, as long as he thought of the hand he put on her neck that night, he was so disgusted that he retched, how could he eat anything.
Zhang Man was so soft-hearted again that he sat closer to him: "Why don't you order takeout?"
"…I can't turn on the phone."
Hearing this answer, Zhang Man became angry and anxious: "So afraid that I will find you?"
The young man shook his head.
In fact, it is not that she is afraid that she will find him, but that he is afraid of himself.
When the phone is turned on, he will call her uncontrollably.
"Then what are you doing these days?"
He doesn't have a TV at home, maybe not even connected to the Internet, what has he been doing all these days
"… Miss you."
As long as you are awake, think of her all the time.
Seeing him like this, Zhang Man suddenly became discouraged.
"You know, how many calls have I called you these days? One hundred and sixty-three. I also sent you many, many text messages, but you didn't reply. Li Wei, if you say go, just leave. , is really cruel."
He was cruel to her, and even more cruel to himself.
After the boy heard it, the nerves in his forehead began to beat again.
He put down his chopsticks and hugged her uncomfortably, not knowing what to do or say to comfort her.
He never thought that she could be so persistent.
"Manman, you've lost weight..."
He touched her shoulders and neck, pinched her cheeks, and felt so distressed. She was already thin, but now she doesn't have much flesh, her chin is pointed, and the rare baby fat on her face is gone.
A face was originally small, but now it has lost a circle, making the eyes appear bigger.
How could this be... According to his original thoughts, after receiving such an email, a 16-year-old would feel sad, hate, and complain...
But how could she be like her, to find him no matter what, thinking about him all the time, even after finding him... still wanting him.
Zhang Man looked at him, there was too much information hidden in his eyes, distressed, puzzled, and confused.
He hesitated to ask, but she could read it at this moment.
Zhang Man turned his head angrily, bit his cheek fiercely, and didn't let go until he bit out a deep tooth mark.
The young man snorted, but didn't dodge, hugging her and letting her vent.
Still puzzled, Zhang Man clenched his fists and hammered him fiercely. Apart from avoiding his face, he randomly hammered his head, shoulders, and chest.
Bone to bone, both of them felt uncomfortable.
- "Li Wei, you and I have known each other for so long, but you don't know me at all."