-I just want to hug you again one day.
He didn't commit suicide, he just thought he had found a way to survive.
Means to get closer to her.
The boy hugged the girl in his arms tightly, kissing her cheeks, lips, and hair tips indiscriminately, he tasted the salty and hot tears on her face.
The apex of the heart was also hot.
He has always had nothing to do with her, he could only throw away his armor and throw up his hands in surrender.
"Manman, if you don't like it, I can't do it anymore. I'll listen to you. Don't cry, okay?"
Zhang Man tightened his clothes.
He was overwhelmed and depressed, and he was hiding here, thinking of this way.
Her voice was muffled.
"Does it hurt?"
The young man hoarse his voice and stroked her long hair: "...Manman, I don't hurt, it doesn't hurt at all, so it doesn't work."
"I want to hear the truth."
The boy was silent for a while: "It may have been a little painful at first, but I really can't feel it now. Manman, don't worry, okay?"
He didn't do this to make her feel bad.
Today, he actually made her shed so many tears.
Zhang Man hugged him in distress and distress: "Boyfriend, no matter what, you can't resist in this way."
So scarred, it's really shocking.
She didn't dare to look at it.
The human sense of pain is originally a way of human self-protection. Because of fear of pain, people will not easily hurt themselves.
And he did the opposite.
How severe is the pain that you want to use pain to eliminate
She knew it might be difficult for him, but she still had to say it.
"Li Wei, can you... try to accept it, accept your delusions? You know, you're just sick, it's no big deal. You can't always fight it hard."
He is only flesh and blood, and if he continues to fight like this, he will one day be covered in bruises.
"I know, it's hard for you. No one wants to be uncontrollable and delusional about something unwarranted. But since you can't control yourself, why don't you learn to accept it? We will slowly accept it later. Treatment will be fine one day."
The boy did not speak, and the two fell into a long silence again.
The light in the room was turned to the lowest level, soft light, with a hint of warm yellow.
Warm colors always feel warmer than cool colors.
The boy looked at the shadow on the girl's face and thought for a long time.
His voice was hoarse and painful: "Manman, I don't want to be unable to control myself all the time."
Finally, he had to say what was the greatest fear in his heart.
"Do you know what happened the night you stayed at my house?"
"I saw Nick standing at the head of the bed, trying to pinch you, but when I woke up, I found that my hand was on your neck."
The boy said, shaking uncontrollably.
As long as he recalled that scene, he couldn't help but feel chills in his heart.
"Manman, maybe one day in the future, I will be like my father, completely lost my mind, personally..."
He hugged her tightly and buried his face in her hair, unable to speak.
She is his favorite.
If there is such a day, then what will she do? He couldn't imagine if one day she was struggling on the brink of death, and he continued to harm without knowing it.
These days, this incident has become his biggest nightmare.
Zhang Man was stunned.
Unexpectedly, that night, such a thing happened.
No wonder, no wonder he made it clear that day that he only had her and wanted her to be with him forever, but he would leave her resolutely afterwards.
It turns out that all decisions are not random.
He knew that he would not be better off without her, but he still made a choice. He must have struggled and suffered, right
Zhang Man once again realized very clearly that this young man, he loved her more than himself.
Her heart was slightly aching and aching, she raised her head from his arms and held his face.
"Li Wei, your condition is completely different from your father's. I have already asked the doctor about your situation. The possibility of dementia is very low. It is very likely that that day was a coincidence. The possibility of you hurting me, very low."
"Do you remember? I told you just now, if you leave me, what kind of person will I be. I'm boring, mediocre, and I'll never get a vigorous love in my life."
She looked straight into the unease and pain in his eyes.
"So, why did you make me fall into the inevitable misfortune of my life because of a small probability event that didn't happen?"
"What I want is to be able to stay by your side all the time. If you are stable, I will be at ease."
After she finished speaking, she did not let him answer immediately.
Unlike before asking him to admit their relationship, she had to give him time for this matter.
Sometimes it takes more courage to accept than to fight.
Encountered such a thing, no one can accept it calmly, even him.
She hugged him quietly and yawned.
The exhaustion of her body made her thoughts gradually blur.
"Boyfriend, I'm so tired today. I want to sleep for a while. Can you stay with me?"
When people are tired, they are easy to be fragile and easy to be soft inside.
Zhang Man rubbed his chin very naturally, coquettishly: "I want you to hold me to sleep."
She said, arching her head on his warm chest, finding the most comfortable sleeping position.
"Wake me up when it's almost twelve o'clock, and we'll count down together."
The boy nodded, hugging his girl passionately, listening to her increasingly steady breathing.
Yes, today is Chinese New Year.
Like his birthday, she always gave him the best present.
…
Zhang Man was awakened by a kiss.
She opened her eyes in a daze, the room was dark, the only light was off, and the man was breathing heavily in her face.
Rather like a big fluffy dog.
She slept soundly just now, and her head wasn't very happy at the moment. He only felt that his face was itchy from his kiss, so he pushed his head away sleepily.
"Li Wei, stop making trouble, what time is it now?"
The young man didn't speak, and wanted to come up, but she pushed him against his head.
"... Eleven forty-five, Manman, you asked me to wake you up."
Zhang Man blinked her dry eyes, and she actually slept for more than two hours.
"It's so late, and there are fifteen minutes left to count down. Don't make trouble with me."
The boy's voice softened, with a bit of grievance.
"Manman... I haven't kissed you for so many days... "
She is so fragrant, so soft, and when I hold her in my arms, my heart is itching.
The ecstasy of being lost and found, and the contentment of holding her in his arms, his mood, after meeting her, seemed to be ups and downs every day.
He couldn't sleep at all.
She slept soundly, breathing quietly, every breath was accompanied by a slight rise and fall of her chest, and the thin spine on her back also rose and fell, like a sleeping kitten nestled in his arms .
Her hair was soft, and while it covered the entire pillow, there were also a few strands that burrowed into his collar mischievously.
Under such a warm yellow light, her lips showed a soft pink color, and the lip lines were not obvious. Unlike him, her lips were always dry.
Her whole person is much more delicate than his.
Looking at her like this, he didn't want to do anything, just wanted to kiss her desperately.
- This girl can easily ignite his most primitive desire as a human being.
She is the only thing he wants to have in this world, and even how to have it is not enough.
Unfortunately, seeing her sleeping soundly, he couldn't bear to disturb her.
I had no choice but to endure it with fiery heart for two hours, and finally waited until eleven forty-five when I could wake her up.
Zhang Man laughed for a while: "Then I didn't let you kiss so many times today."
The young man looked at her, leaned over to hold her head, kissed her cheek and lips, and replied, "That's my reward for choosing the right option, it doesn't count."
…
The two finally made it to the last minute to count down to the new year together.
Pain and torture, finally left together with this year.
"Boyfriend, happy new year!"
"Manman, Happy New Year!"