Shi Jingzhi suddenly felt a little sad.
Traveling around the world, Shi Jingzhi rarely empathizes with others. The joys, sorrows, anger, and happiness of others are like a layer of gauze, coming and going, and he can't see them clearly. He doesn't know spring in his heart, and he has always been a quick visitor, only seeing human desires, and can't see joy, anger, sorrow, and happiness.
However, at this moment, his shell was peeled off by the scene in front of him, causing him to feel a sharp pain.
If they were in each other's place, would Zi Xi stay? What about Yin Ci
Are the ties of worldly ties something so hurtful
Su Si cried too painfully in the inner demon illusion. Shi Jingzhi didn't know whether he was crying for his parents' deception or had a vague premonition of what he had given up.
"I never told you... I asked you to hide well, and then you could go with Taiheng. Isn't it good?" Yan Qing's voice was a little trembling, and his face was pale.
Shi Jingzhi was silent for a long time: "Even if you leave with Taiheng in a few days, can you survive?... You can bear to leave your only playmate, but you can't leave your only family."
Among the people, there are only a few who will stumble after the carriage and tell you that it is not a good place and you should not go.
In just a few sunrises and sunsets, Su Si gained a relative, and this was the only relative left.
The black snake stopped in mid-air, its head drooping slightly. Its murderous aura weakened a bit, and it was in a trance.
Yan Qing tried to move towards it, his voice becoming more bitter: "But I would rather die than be your inner demon."
Shi Jingzhi held his flag horizontally, blocking Yan Qing. This time he did not deliberately act in a pretentious manner, and his every move also gave off a bit of the aura of a sect leader: "It's not easy to stabilize, don't worry about it... Your inner demon may not be yours."
The two men’s inner demons entangled each other, and the scene changed again.
Su Si had grown taller, and Yan Qing's cheeks had gained some flesh, making them look healthier and fresher. The two were dressed simply and cleanly, and they didn't seem to be in the village. It was dark all around, as if it was night.
Uncle Tan praised my martial arts today. Su Si rolled up his sleeves to show off his thin arms. He said that when I grow up, he will formally accept me as his apprentice. But I don't want to learn how to kill pigs. When I become a hero in the future, everyone will be proud.
Yan Qing's face was still childish, and wrinkles seemed to appear between his brows: "I'll take off my smock first, and put on the clothes I'm wearing today. Later, Grandma Tan will go to sleep, and I'll have to go and wash her feet and change clothes... Uncle Tan has only taken us in for half a year, and he kindly let us live in his home, so you should be more restrained."
Su Si chuckled: I don’t understand, but you are a great talent who can control Tai Heng.
People say that the earlier you practice martial arts, the better. If you really want to go, you can go to Yidu tomorrow and take a look at Taiheng. Yan Qing hesitated for a while, his tone serious.
We are hunting down the Yan family everywhere. If we really want to kill Taiheng, shouldn't we just pretend to be blind? Besides, if he doesn't go, we can't just leave him outside. We are still alive now, so it doesn't matter if we wait for a few years - at least until he is not so poor and can support himself.
The two were the same age, but Yan Qing had been malnourished for a long time, and compared to Su Si, he was still a child of six or seven years old. Su Si hit a sore spot, and Yan Qing was so angry that he snorted: "I will be ten years old next month! When I grow up, I will definitely be taller than you."
After thinking for a while, he found a perfect way to take revenge: Ah Si, have you memorized your lesson today? If you want to be a hero in the future, it is not good to be illiterate.
Su Si screamed in panic: Oh my God, my ancestors, you said you are so young, why do you act like a sour scholar
Shi Jingzhi reacted instantly—ten years old, that was ten years ago.
According to Yan Qing, after Yan Qing's father died, the two agreed to escape from the village. Now is the year when the two are completely separated after relying on each other for several years.
Seeing Yan Qing take out the book with a stern face, Su Si felt a headache. He rolled his eyes and held his coat tightly: "I have to go out tonight. There is a market in the north of the town. It's very lively."
Yan Qing's expression changed: I promised you this morning that I wouldn't go out tonight.
Those apricot kernels you played with? Sanzi, it's okay on ordinary days, but tonight is a serious matter, so don't worry about whether it's good or bad.
Su Si played with his purse, making the copper coins inside jingle on purpose: there were so many things at the fair and they were so cheap, I might as well buy some candy.
Don’t go. Or you can take your children with you.
If I leave, who will take care of Grandma Tan? If she is unhappy, Uncle Tan will also be angry, and neither of us will be happy.
Su Si used threats and inducements, but Yan Qing still refused to buy it and held Su Si's clothes tightly: "You promised me not to go out. I feel bad now, really."
If I had known, I would not have let him go out to play pretending to be blind. If he had seen that monk who taught him fortune-telling, he would have definitely given him a beating. Su Si gritted his teeth, it was a big deal, it was just a few apricot kernels, a trick to fool people, look how scared he was.
Su Si opened Yan Qing's fingers and said: "I'll be back soon. It's almost the New Year, everything is expensive around here, and I finally caught up with this market...
Yan Qing pursed her lips, and the two of them were in a stalemate for a long time.
At that time, Su Si was a head taller than Yan Qing, and Yan Qing was under great pressure from the other's gaze. Under Su Si's relaxed gaze, Yan Qing's expression changed from firmness to hesitation, and finally to the unconfidence of "Is this unreasonable?"
Su Si rubbed his father's head hard and struck while the iron was hot: Stop making trouble, be good, or I will be angry.
Yan Qing frowned, and finally let go hesitantly: Then, then come back early.
After Su Si left, Yan Qing stared blankly at her own neck and slowly bit her lips.
He quickly helped her wash and sleep, then sat on the threshold, anxiously waiting for Su Si to come home. The night gradually darkened, and Yan Qing was standing on the threshold, unable to move. He stared at the gate of the courtyard, clenching the apricot kernels tightly, and his thin fists were a little swollen.
At this moment, the adult Yan Qing beside Shi Jingzhi trembled, and the eyeballs on the shackles spun wildly. Shi Jingzhi frowned slightly, as if he realized something.
That day, Su Si didn't come back after all.
Yan Qing waited all night with tears in her eyes. When it was daybreak, she searched again and again around the town, but still found nothing. Afraid that Su Si couldn't find her, she obediently returned to the Tan family and waited.
Unfortunately, without Su Si's help, the butcher Tan was unwilling to support a "blind" man alone. Not long after, Yan Qing was kicked out.
He was in a daze for a long time while carrying Da Li, and finally turned around and walked towards Taiheng alone.
On the other hand, Su Si's inner demon filled in the gaps in Yan Qing's memory—
That night, Su Si spent most of his savings and bought a simple longevity lock at the market. He specially asked the merchant to seal it with red paper and put it in his arms with great care.
But before he could take two steps, ox-carts and donkey-carts were piled up, and merchants carrying goods were crowding and trampling on each other. People screamed loudly, and the firelight illuminated the night red.
There was a conflict between the Chi Gou Sect and the Ling Sect nearby, and the two groups kept fighting, and the fight even spread to the market.
Su Si was only a 10-year-old child after all, and without an adult to rely on, he was knocked around by the chaotic flow of people and nearly fell headfirst into the midst of swordplay.
In the end, the Chi Gou Cult gained the upper hand and killed all the Ling Cult members. When cleaning up the battlefield, one of them exclaimed, and picked up the dazed Su Si from the pile of corpses: "This guy has a handsome face and a good physique. He is a good material for killing."
Su Si was dressed in rough clothes and had been through a lot of mud and blood. It was obvious that he was not from a wealthy family, so it was very easy for him to get married.
Su Si regained consciousness after being dragged by someone, and immediately struggled hard. Unfortunately, the Chi Gou Sect was not as reasonable as Tai Heng - the man slapped Su Si, and when Su Si opened his eyes again, he had been taken away for who knows how many miles.
The surroundings became increasingly darker and less orderly. Tragic scenes were everywhere, with countless faces showing either mockery or pain. Colors mixed into a bloody mass, and all kinds of things twisted together to form a huge human face.
People looked down at him from a high position, and the oppression was suffocating.
The black snake lowered its head and huddled into a ball.
Shi Jingzhi recognized that face, it was the face of Wuxue Po. In this out-of-control inner demon, Wuxue Po's voice was still hoarse and unpleasant: I have never misjudged anyone. With your personality, you should have joined the God's religion in your lifetime. If you want to run, then run. It's your ability to escape...
The inner demon scene became more and more distorted, almost to the brink of collapse. The images in all directions rotated madly, becoming increasingly difficult to see clearly—
Su Si really escaped. He practiced martial arts very hard, broke through the guards again and again, and fled to the dirtiest and darkest corner of the martial arts world.
But as the first demon sect, the Chi Gou Sect was no pushover. The higher the Tao, the higher the demon. Su Si could not escape for more than two or three months, and would be caught again. Wuxue Po did not care about his disobedience. In her opinion, this seemed to be some kind of effective training phase.
He was caught and then escaped, then caught again. Su Si had been on the run for ten years and never stopped.
Over the years, haven't you seen enough of the dirty corners of the martial arts world? Your ignorant friend, and the so-called Taiheng dream, are almost becoming a demon... Forget it, if you give up easily, you don't deserve this position...
My dear, you are the young leader that I personally selected. There will always be a day when you will voluntarily come back...
After hearing these words, Yan Qing froze in place. His inner demons were completely suppressed, and the darkness from Su Si's side came over him.
In the demonic scene of the heart that was about to collapse, the voice of the Black Blood Lady became louder and louder, like thunder and collapsing mountains above the head.
There is no law of reincarnation in the world. Good deeds will not be rewarded, and evil deeds will not be punished. There are no ghosts or gods above your head, so just do whatever you want. You should know this better than anyone else...
The human heart will leave scars. No matter how dangerous the world is, once you have experienced it, the broken truths and expectations can never be put back together again.
Ten years is enough to grind a person into dust.
Most of the famous and upright people in the world rely on their passion and sincerity. However, Su Si was not young at all, and he had seen too much malice, and was tainted with uncontrollable dark suspicion in his bones, so he was destined to have no chance with Tai Heng again.
The black snake hissed loudly, and two bloody tears flowed down. It suddenly threw itself at the rocks like crazy, as if it wanted to use the momentum to shave off the scales on its body. Unfortunately, after the frenzy, the scales were still firmly attached to its body, and it only got a few bloody wounds.
Shi Jingzhi no longer protected Yan Qing. He looked at the giant face formed by countless tragic scenes, his face empty.
Ignorance breeds resentment, resentment and hatred have no master and eventually bite back at one’s original heart.
Is Su Si's "foolishness" due to his inability to distinguish between good and evil, or is it because his passion has cooled and he is unable to give up the last bit of delusion about "the truth" and is unwilling to sink into the evil path
Yan Qingshuang dug his fingers into the dirt on the top of the mountain. There were many gravels on the top of the mountain. His ten fingers were covered in blood and tears were streaming down his face.
The flesh shackles finally stopped attacking Su Si. They tangled into a ball and turned towards their master with murderous intent.
On it was a withered face made of all the evil in the world, and around it was a net of flesh shackles dotted with red ghost eyes, just like a picture of hell. The ground was covered with blood and tears, and it was a mess. In the cracks where the inner demon scene collapsed, a trace of blue light still shone through.
Clean, clear, and ruthless.
Shi Jingzhi leaned on the flagpole with both hands and suddenly felt suffocated.
"I'm not complaining about my inner demons, I'm complaining about my fate."
Shi Jingzhi murmured without looking at Yan Qing.
The world is full of dangers and unpredictable situations. Yan Qing is not only not Su Si's inner demon, but also seems to be the last bit of truth in his heart.
"Yan Qing, I'm just the opposite... I'm not angry about the injustice, but about being powerless."
From the beginning to now, I have clearly participated in every turning point of the other's fate, but I have not been able to save anything. Ten years have passed, the world has changed, but it is still vaguely the same as before.
The Yan family's ghost eyes are still annoying, and Yan Qing is still a street rat, and can only survive in the world as a blind man. Although he has achieved the most fair balance in the world, life is still like sailing against the current, and it takes all his energy to just whitewash the peace.
The anger in his heart had been burning for more than a decade and had never died down. Over the years, his resentment had been directed at himself and had become a deep-seated disease.
Hearing Shi Jingzhi's words, Yan Qing wiped away two tears and suddenly laughed.
He stepped on his inner demon and stood up shakily, as if he had lost his sense of pain. One after another, red eyeballs exploded under Yan Qing's feet, making a sticky sound like thick blood.
Yan Qing walked towards the black snake covered with wounds and slowly hugged it.
The flesh shackles came from all directions, binding the two together, and neither could break free.
"In the end, birds of a feather flock together." Yan Qing closed his eyes and hugged the snake. "You are the same, but you have already accepted your fate, but you are unwilling to give up... Ah Si, I will accompany you from now on."
We are all still alive, even if it is just a hopeless struggle, there is no need for one person to continue.
The black snake's scales finally loosened a little, and the black scales fell off, revealing Su Si's bloody upper body. The flesh shackles were completely still, not retracted, and he no longer attacked others indiscriminately.
Shi Jingzhi sighed and slowly retracted the flagpole in the middle.
He approached the two dying people and looked at Su Si, who was covered in blood and had half-closed eyes: "Su Si, can you still hear me?"
Su Si raised his eyes and nodded weakly.
Shi Jingzhi's face was expressionless: "Let me ask you, if you could go back to the beginning, back to the moment when you first met Shi Zhongyu, would you go with her?"
Su Si was stunned for a moment, then he showed a tired, almost meaningless smile.
He shook his head very lightly without any hesitation.
Shi Jingzhi stood still for a moment, then bowed his head to the two people in front of him and saluted solemnly.
"Thank you both for clearing up my confusion."
Yin Ci, who was far away, noticed something was wrong and turned around to approach: "The two masters of anger and ignorance haven't shown up yet, why do you want to wake them up?"
Once the inner demons are resolved, anger and delusion will all dissipate. Without a target, the demon master will leave on his own. The clues left by Yan Budu will also be left unresolved.
"Because we are no longer needed." Shi Jingzhi turned his back to Yin Ci, his voice somewhat stiff as he tried to suppress his emotions. "You are already seriously injured, so it is better for you to rest in advance."
Yin Ci looked at the back and keenly noticed that something was wrong: "What's wrong?"
"Aci, I don't want to ask about your inner demons. I just want to ask you one thing - why aren't you surprised by the fact that 'you have no inner demons'?"
There was a slight tremor in Shi Jingzhi's voice.
"You've seen your situation a long time ago, right?"
Previously, I thought Yin Ci was cold and indifferent. But now it seems that being cut off from the world and watching the fire from the other side of the river is the same as mine.
Shi Jingzhi felt a dull pain in his chest.
The inner demons were transformed, and they used their inner strength as fuel. Yan Qing and Su Si had already reached the end of their strength, and once their knots were revealed, the inner demons collapsed immediately. The turbid fragments fluttered and swayed, like a heavy black snow.
The two masters of anger and ignorance brought the magic of Yama Budu, which made people unstable. This is indeed a dead end full of malice, but it can also be an opportunity to lead people to enlightenment.
In the recent mental demon, the crying of the young child was shrill, and the despair of farewell was deep. Shi Jingzhi felt a little inexplicable envy.
In an instant, all kinds of scenes from his life flashed through his mind.
From the confusion, flattery and vigilance of childhood, to the fluttering of butterflies in the hazy red leaves, to the entanglement of hair under the starry sky, and finally ending with joy and indulgence on the Buddha's head.
In the colorful vortex, only Shi Jingzhi stood alone in the middle. His memory of "that person" was vague.
Yes, I want to have a disciple who is not bound by worldly ties.
The apprentice can be anyone.
As long as the goal is achieved, anyone can love, rely on and worry about you.
I am so high and mighty, I just want to taste that little bit of sweetness, just a little. Unfortunately, I am bound by worldly ties, after all, they are bound by worldly ties. If I don't want to get involved in the world, what's the point of talking about worldly ties
After entering the formation, Shi Jingzhi actually had some vague awareness.
I have been accumulating thoughts for many years, but I don’t know where they come from, I don’t know where to exit, and I have never shown them to others. Over time, I myself have no way of distinguishing those suppressed emotions, and I just think of them as “despair”.
The suffering is ignorant and chaotic, and the original wish is also vague, so there will be no mundane obstacles.
Yin Ci was not surprised, was it because he saw through his true nature? What did Yin Ci think of such a "master"? ... I wonder what other people think, is it such a disturbing thing
All the previous intimacy, temptation, and fear were now gone, leaving only an indescribable emptiness. The greedy master brushed away the clouds that blocked my eyes, and the desires disappeared, revealing only my empty heart.
Maybe it's time to take the first step.
If I continue to be alone and stay out of things, I won't develop any inner demons, nor will I be able to feel deep emotions.
Shi Jingzhi turned around and looked at Yin Ci with a smile on his face, his eyes slightly red.
"Aci, let's continue to look for the two masters, Chen and Chi." He said softly, "Now that I'm here, they won't leave."
Yin Ci didn't react.
Shi Jingzhi didn't need any further explanation—the moment he finished speaking, countless miserable thorns shot out from under his feet and spread wildly.
"Wu Chen Yan" If you want to ask me, ask me, don't ask the common people. Right now, I want to blame you and be angry with you, love, hate, anger and ignorance are intertwined, and I blatantly impose them on the common people.
The thorns stretched out desperately, with a reluctance to die and a determination to stop at any cost. They entangled the rocks, the swaying "bald branches", and the huge headlights, as if they were going to devour everything. In an instant, the thorns climbed up the peaks near and far, covering the ground, with their sharp tips pointing straight to the sky.
At this moment, Shi Jingzhi's long-standing defense collapsed. In front of Yin Ci, he smashed his heart into the mortal world, revealing the ordinary grievances, unwillingness and relief.
Snow falls on the mountains.
When the mind is unstable, anger and ignorance arise, and inner demons are formed.
Shi Jingzhi clenched a Heart Demon Thorn tightly, the sharp thorn scratched his palm, and dark red blood slowly dripped.
"Go find it quickly." Shi Jingzhi repeated it several times.
His face was pale, and his smile was ugly. His voice was trembling, with a faint hint of crying.
Yin Ci still didn't leave.
I don't know why, compared to the stunning glimpse in front of the greedy master, Shi Jingzhi, who is obviously in a miserable state, looks a little more lively now, so lively that Yin Ci can't bear to abandon him.
Yin Ci carefully walked over the thorn bush, just like when he was still blind, and grabbed Shi Jingzhi's wrist.
"Master just had an inner demon, but he didn't get attacked by it."
His movements were firm and his voice was flat.
"If you want to find it, let's go look for it together."