Sheep I said:
"If it weren't for you—"
Lai Zuoyi's words are like sharp thorns that can pass through all sharp objects after thinking about it for a long time. At least in Yang Shiluo's eyes, that thorn has pierced Lai Yunyue's soul one by one, and is gradually swallowing up the small thorns. Little soul, she wanted to cry but couldn't cry. The only one who could lend a helping hand to save Lai Yunyue was herself, Lai Zuoyi.
The cries and whining in the living room were like a never-ending farce. Yang Shiluo was caught in the middle and was invisibly pulled by two parties. He couldn't say a word for a long time, and could only seem to be watching from the audience.
"sorry Sorry… "
Lai Yunyue cried with snot and tears all over her face, and Lai Zuo also had a hideous face. When she saw the child who kept apologizing and wiped away her tears, she suddenly woke up when her sleeves were wet. Come down, push Yang Shiluo away and rush towards Lai Yunyue, hugging her and crying.
"I'm sorry, mom loves you very much! Mom loves you very much! I'm sorry Yunyue, please forgive mom - sorry, mom shouldn't hurt you like this, sorry Yunyue, mommy sorry for you-"
Lai Zuo also hugged Lai Yunyue and cried, kept kissing her cheek to apologize, with reproach and pain in her eyes; Lai Yunyue also hugged her tightly, kept sniffing her nose and shaking her head, saying that it was okay, Yang Shiluo's eyes were red, Hastily fetched toilet paper for the mother and daughter.
"I'm sorry Yunyue... Mommy took you to McDonald's on Saturday, okay? Don't you like fried chicken? Would you like to buy fried chicken with your favorite chocolate sundae? Forgive mom... I'm really sorry... I'm sorry, mom knows wrong, sorry..."
Lai Zuo also hugged Lai Yunyue to repent, Lai Yunyue sniffed and said ok, coveting the tender embrace she gave at this time, slowly closed her eyes with the rhythm of cradle-like comfort, and fell asleep like this.
"Senior sister." Yang Shiluo whispered softly, holding back the feeling that poured out of his heart.
"Shh..." Lai Zuo also put his index finger on his lips, gently picked up Lai Yunyue and returned to her room, wiped the little face that was crying with snot and tears with a warm towel, and then quietly took it to the door.
"eat first."
After Lai Zuo also left Lai Yunyue's room, he took a deep breath and stabilized his voice. Yang Shiluo nodded and sat side by side with her in the living room to eat the lunch box in silence - or half a lunch box. After what happened just now, both of them both No appetite.
"Yunyue is... I was born after being raped."
After being quiet for a long time, Lai Zuo also said this sentence. Even though Yang Shiluo knew it just now, his body froze suddenly, and then nodded.
"I finished my studies abroad at that time. I would like to say that if you have work experience abroad, you will find it easier to find a job when you return to China... It will also make you look good." Lai Zuoyi's eyes always focused on the pair of hands that clenched his chopsticks tightly. Hand: "At that time, I found a job, thinking that the boss was certain of my ability to let a rookie be a secretary, but he raped me after a social event... and even threatened a second time, and I ran away. The company's boss background It's too hard, whether it's the media or the judges are his people, there's no way I can win."
"Beasts..." Yang Shiluo gritted his teeth, and after seeing Lai Zuoyi's fingers slightly bent, he decided to take a deep breath, afraid of provoking her a second time.
"I really love Yunyue." Lai Zuo also bowed his head: "I love... I love... She is my daughter, I know this, both rationally and emotionally. But every time I think of her other half blood It's that man, I'll remember what happened that night. No matter how patient I can be, I know that adults shouldn't be responsible for the children, but... I still made the wrong choice, hurt Yunyue again and again in the loss of control, and She is more mature than me and forgives me time and time again."
Lai Zuo also sniffed after speaking, and looked at Yang Shiluo with red eyes: "I always wanted to be... a perfect mother, just like my mother. But I have only become the worst woman, not even a mother... Poetry Luo, is this ironic?"
"I'm afraid I don't even have the courage to face it." Yang Shiluo's heart cramped, she wished she could kill the man who hurt Lai Zuoyi with her own hands, especially when she saw the disappointment and pain of herself in the eyes of the other party, she understood, Lai Zuo Yi has always been a very gentle person, but she completely tore up her world because of the selfish desires of others.
"I'm really bad." Lai Zuo also shed another tear, Yang Shiluo handed over the toilet paper, suppressed his inner emotions and listened to the other party's complaints.
"I was abroad before, when Yunyue was young... I once wanted to strangle her, but I couldn't. When I was older, I would take her out to play, and then deliberately throw it away. The first time I did this was to take her I went to a movie and lied to her that my mother went out to pee and left her child in the movie theater and went home first. I felt relieved at first, but the pressure inside me was getting bigger and bigger. Going back before the end, I still remember asking Yunyue if the movie was good after the end, she said she didn't know because she had been waiting for me."
"Um… "
Yang Shiluo fantasized about the scene a little, and didn't dare to think about it again.
Now Lai Yunyue is only six years old, how old was it when it happened
"Once again, I took her to the amusement park to play and deliberately lost the bag." Lai Zuo also curled his lips, but he was not happy: "My inner struggle is stubborn, and the same is true, I lost it and picked it up, lost it and picked it up again. … It’s like Yunyue is some kind of doll. She takes it out when she likes it, and locks it up when she’s tired. I don’t know and I don’t have the courage to ask her if she remembers these things. At least I remember it myself. I remember it clearly every time, as if I kept going I took the carving knife and engraved it in my heart, and recorded those stupid me."
So she fidgets every time she goes to a new place, just because she is afraid of being thrown away again? What Yang Shiluo thought of was Lai Yunyue nervous and scared, quietly looking around when Lai Zuo was not paying attention.
The stomach was tangled again.
"And then, I really can't stand myself like this." Lai Zuo also smiled reluctantly, wiping the tears from his eyes with his left hand: "Shiro, it's true that I love you. Because you said before that you like stereotypes. So I wanted to come back and confess to you, but now I have more Yunyue, I'm afraid you don't want me, I feel that I betrayed you and had a child, and then it started to deteriorate... I will do something to Yunyue, I knew I shouldn't hit her, but I couldn't hold back my uncontrollable emotions. Reason was like a blown fuse. Every time I came back to my senses, she was bruised and bruised by me and cried on the ground, I, I..."
Lai Zuo couldn't go on anymore, she lowered her head and wept silently, wiping away the tears from her face.
Yang Shiluo's mood fell to the bottom of the valley with her cry, and a load of maliciousness hit the sea. They were caught in the icy whirlpool. Yang Shiluo saw that the wounded Lai Zuo was also sinking. She tried her best to get close to the other party. Pull up.
"I... know, know that I think too much..." Lai Zuoyi's voice trembled: "But, I was so helpless at that time... and I haven't seen you for many years, many years, I am afraid that you have changed... Yun Yue's I don't even dare to tell my parents... I'm so scared... I'm so scared... No one can help me..."
"I can!" Yang Shiluo shouted. She finally took Lai Zuoyi's hand when she was about to completely blame herself: "I can - Zuoyi, I can help you! And wow, I like you very much too, It's the kind of love! You don't have to worry about Xiaoyueyue! I like you and Xiaoyueyue, because she's not our daughter? So, I like my wife, how can I hate my children? "
Lai Zuo also sniffed and looked at her: "You don't mind if she is..."
"What do you mind? It's too late to like it!" Yang Shiluo knew that her tone was fake, she thought about it, decided to put away her smile, and looked at each other seriously: "Zuoyi, I love you too, I believe you want to let go of this all of a sudden. It's impossible to hurt, but it's not good to be immersed in it, neither for you nor for Satsuki, and things happened..."
"Then what should I do?" Lai Zuo also looked at her and asked back, "Shiro... I really don't have a clue, is it better to send Yunyue away... I-I'm not a qualified mother, she will definitely ask her when she grows up... "
"Zuoyi, calm down first." Yang Shiluo pinched her cheek, feeling that the past scenes were reversed. In the past, the school girl chased after her butt for help, and in turn hugged the panicked senior sister: "This can't be rushed. , Let's take it step by step. First of all, you must believe that I don't care what happened to you. It doesn't mean I don't care, but no matter what happens, my love for you still hasn't changed, and I also like Xiaoyueyue very much. She is very well-behaved and obedient. If you don't mind, I hope that I can live with you in the future. We will take care of Xiaoyueyue and grow together. The only way to let go of the fear of the past is to face the fear. "
"No, won't you send it away?"
"I'm not sure, but for Xiaoyueyue, you are her only relative, even if the child never spoke, but I can see that Xiaoyueyue loves you as a mother. Even if you made mistakes in the past, you should In the face of making up for it with actions, rather than sending her away, Xiaoyueyue has been waiting for you to turn back!"
After Yang Shiluo finished speaking, he looked at Lai Zuoyi tenderly: "Are you Xiaoyueyue?"
"Love, she is my daughter." Lai Zuo nodded lightly without hesitation.
"Well, it's my daughter too." Yang Shiluo giggled: "I was born, how can you not love me?"
Lai Zuo also heard a stun for a while, and finally burst out laughing, Yang Shiluo followed her smile and took her hand, and continued to say softly: "So, let's face it together! There must be many problems in the future, but we will definitely be able to. Let’s get through this together and let go of those hurt memories first? I believe that future happiness is definitely waiting ahead, let’s move forward together, okay?”
"it is good."
"Uh-huh!"
They held hands and stared at each other.
In the belated warmth, Lai Zuo also said leisurely: "Shiro, I have been regretting my decision for the past few years, but now... I am so glad that it was the right thing to come back to you."
"Well, I'm also very happy!" She smiled like a little sun to dispel the fear in Lai Zuoyi's heart: "No matter what happens in the future, I will be by your side, so let's go on together!"
"Well, let's go down with Yunyue!"
"Of course! She was born to me—haha!"
Yang Shiluo kissed Lai Zuoyi on the lips, the two smiled at each other, and a love flower appeared in the dispersing haze.
In the future, there will definitely be a sea of happy flowers blooming there.
I help my sister have a baby? (Finish)