In the silence, Ye Qingxuan stared at the characters and patterns on the blackboard, as if he was in a trance, thinking about something.
"Teacher, we have to interpret so many ancient documents to understand the previous world, but what is the meaning of this? I suddenly don't understand."
Ye Qingxuan asked, "We have spent so much time studying and researching interpretation, but for what purpose?"
"To find an explanation."
Abraham replied, "To explain something."
"Explanation? To be honest, teacher, what I need most now is an explanation."
Ye Qingxuan leaned back on the chair tiredly and closed his eyes in depression: "Since I returned to Avalon, I always encounter some things. Some... very bad things. It's like suddenly coming to a place that belongs to In the world of monsters, many things have become strange, and everyone has become unable to communicate and understand. Even I don’t even know how to look at the world."
He recalled the wild laughter and hoarse voices in his memory, and lowered his head in exhaustion.
"Everything is obviously normal, but why did it become like this overnight? Or maybe I have been living in an illusion. Is this the true face of the world? Is it them or me that is wrong?"
It was as if memories suddenly came to life, dragging him back to that unlucky day.
There, the dwarf dog Werner looked at him with blood on his face.
But even though it was miserable, he still grinned wildly, twisted like a devil, and yelled in his ears:
"Now the entire gang in the Lower City wants your life! Do you think letting me go will be useful? Spare my life and I will let you go? Don't be naive... Now everyone in the entire Lower City wants your life. !”
"Are you innocent? But innocent people can't die?"
"Where do you think this is? This is Avalon!"
Suddenly, Werner changed, swelled, and turned into a ferocious black shadow. He raised his bone saw high, chopped up the corpse, and sprayed blood.
Then, it got dark again, and in the deep night fog, a ghost-like shadow was chasing after him, and a sharp voice echoed in his ears.
Purify, purify, purify…
He obviously wanted to reason, but there was no reason to reason. He just went to the street to buy something, but he was being hunted down by a group of people inexplicably. Obviously he just wanted to help people, but he had to be cut into pieces and purified.
This hellish world suddenly became indescribable and incomprehensible...
"I don't understand, teacher."
Ye Qingxuan asked: "What went wrong?"
"The world is complicated, Ye Zi. Sometimes, we need something to help us understand it."
Abraham looked at him: "When I was young, I often felt confused and afraid of some things. The world changes so fast, and other people's ideas also change so fast. But I am always slow and unable to understand. I study interpretation The same is true for the Dharma, and I want to find a way that allows me to understand those things. Find a solution. At least, if you can understand them, you won't be afraid anymore."
"Teacher, have you found it?" Ye Qingxuan raised his head and asked.
Abraham smiled bitterly and did not answer.
…
…
Late at night, the basement was converted into a piano room.
The sharp notes are like a chain saw cutting metal. They echo in the underground space, filled with indescribable annoyance and depression, and are disturbing.
In front of the piano, the young boy absentmindedly played the keys in front of him.
The rhythm and melody that Charles reiterated over and over again were completely missed.
"Stop, stop, Ye Zi, stop first."
Charles stretched out his hand to stop him and shook his head, "Zi Zi, is this the piano you're playing? I don't know, I thought you were smashing things again..."
Ye Qingxuan retracted his palm dully, "Sorry, I was a little distracted."
"I know you are very upset, but there is nothing you can do if you continue like this." Charles spread his hands and handed him an orange:
"Come on, eat some fruit and calm down."
Ye Qingxuan shook his head: "I just want to find a solution."
"Then did you find it?"
"No."
Ye Qingxuan exhaled irritably, and hit the keys with his fingers like hammers:
“—So, I’m going to vent!”
The sharp sound, like iron scraping against each other, sounded again, with a manic and angry reverberation.
This is nothing like playing, there is no structure at all!
Charles shook his head, sighed, left quietly, and closed the door for him: At this time, it was best to let him calm down.
But in the quiet basement, the messy sound of the piano, like the friction between iron pieces and gravel, is still echoing continuously. The sharp-turning melody carries unspeakable depression and despair, which is horrifying.
A large number of tritone passages emerge constantly in the chaotic playing, like the low whine of countless people. The sound of the piano drove away all the warmth and sunshine, just like a cold night.
In the dark cold night described in the sound of the piano, countless gloomy and manic emotions shrouded the sky like black clouds, turning the entire world into eternal darkness.
Every jump of the manic piano sound is like an angry thunder flashing between heaven and earth.
Unconsciously, Ye Qingxuan began to play the music score imprinted in his memory.
Only this time, it was pure venting.
No longer care about the rules, no longer care about the notes, no longer think about sensing and controlling the ether, put aside all worries.
Ye Qingxuan just tilted the mania in his heart with anger and concentration.
In the darkness, only the sharp sound of the piano sounded.
The helplessness, confusion, confusion, and anger that had accumulated in his soul for the past few days were all vividly vented in the lonely sound of the piano.
It was like a madman dancing, desperately smashing everything within reach, bringing a series of broken sounds. It shattered tranquility, shattered reason, and shattered all restraints.
The anxiety and depression contained in "Black Friday" are interpreted to the extreme in this unstructured bomb. He has never understood the anger and... helplessness contained in this song so well.
Confusion is born from the helpless predicament, and confusion produces uneasiness. In the uneasiness, mania is brewing, and anger sprouts, followed by hysterical rage.
But just when the performance soared to its peak, the sharp sound suddenly dropped.
The intermittent, angry, maddening voice became thinner, like a low whisper lingering in the ears.
It's like something is brewing in the sound of nothingness, so all the power in it is drained, and even the human mind wants to be pulled into it.
Although he was not concentrating on the control, Ye Qingxuan could not help but be immersed in the playing.
He couldn't even tell whether he was playing the piece of music, or whether it was the piece of music that was tempting him, tempting his mind to go deeper into the melody.
It was like peeling off layers of shells and layers of disguise. His mind gradually sank into this murmuring melody, concentrating on experiencing every note and every measure. means.
He began to think.
What exactly is this sharp and broken dark melody trying to depict
Is it anger? Is it manic? Is it depression? Is it fear? Is it the resentment that cannot be obtained? Is it loneliness? Or the despair of having no love in life
No, neither.
At that moment, a flash of lightning passed through his heart, piercing through all the mysteries and confusions, tearing apart all the doubts and confusions.
A flash of light illuminates "reality."
Ye Qingxuan's movements suddenly stopped and he opened his eyes in surprise: "Is it guilt?"
Yes, it's guilt.
It is the "pain" that time has not waited for us, and the "despair" of trying to save something with all your strength and risking everything, but in the end it is all in vain. It's "involuntarily" that betrays the love and affection of one's loved ones.
It is the "powerlessness" of being unable to make up for it after missing it, and the "guilt" of being powerless.
Guilt, guilt, guilt, guilt...
In the dark movement, every jump of note and every change of interval are filled with guilt that is like crying blood.
At that moment, the "soul" brewing in the melody finally emerged from the plain notes. Suddenly, the melody changes wildly.
It was like the stagnant water suddenly stirred up waves, and the radiance of a collision of wills suddenly lit up in a formless and unconscious body. That is the life of this dark movement, the "spirituality" brewing in the melody!
…
Outside the door, Charles left and returned with a lot of fruit in his arms, wandering worriedly outside the door.
I don’t know what kind of stimulation I got when I went out this time. My whole style has changed. It’s worrying to be locked in the basement reading books every day.
In order to appease him, Charlotte specially brought back a lot of fruit from the backyard of the Academy of Change, intending to fill this guy's stomach first and then talk to him about psychological counseling. But when he made up his mind and opened the door, his movements suddenly stopped.
A tearful dark melody flowed out from the space behind the door, lingering in his ears, as if it had come alive, turning into a resentful spirit and singing softly, singing heartbreaking music.
He froze in place, and the fruit fell to the ground with a gurgling sound, but Ciel didn't care about his heartache. Instead, his eyes grew bigger and bigger, almost popping out of their sockets.
What the hell is this? !
Spiritual resonance? Are you kidding me
Charles felt that there was something wrong with his ears: This guy locked himself in the basement and smashed the piano as if to vent, and he entered a state that many musicians rarely encounter, and resonated with the "spirituality" in the music
From an apprentice with no foundation, he almost mastered the essence of the movement in one step. And it’s still such a dark and extreme, dark movement full of despair
His expression twitched, and he closed the door carefully, not daring to interrupt Ye Qingxuan's indescribable state of enlightenment.
He tiptoed to pick up the fruit on the ground, returned to the living room, and chewed the banana dully, lost in thought.
In the corner, the girl who was brushing Lao Fei's hair turned around and became confused when she saw his appearance: "Charle, what's wrong with you? It seems like your girlfriend has been abducted..."
"nothing… "
Charles muttered numbly, and after a long time, he slapped himself twice. After making sure that he was not dreaming again, he couldn't help but pat his thigh and sighed:
"What a ghost!"