Looking at the annoyed teacher Xiaolu, Lu Xin and No. 8, they suddenly fell silent.
They saw Teacher Xiaolu's guilt and inner torment.
But they stand from two different angles, neither understand nor understand.
The children in the orphanage are divided into three types:
One is the one who died and was brought back to life, just like No. 8. They all maintained different attitudes and feelings towards Lu Xin, who once killed them. The other is people who have died. They have lost consciousness, but there are still people who feel bad for them.
There is another kind of deer...
She survived, but she became disabled. The person who used to run so fast can no longer run.
It should be said that she is the most painful one...
That's why Number Eight found her because she's the best person to litigate.
However, now she believes that she is the sinner.
And, is this feeling real
…
…
"I… "
Teacher Xiaolu also opened his mouth with difficulty, summoned up his courage, and looked at Lu Xin.
She seemed to have a hard time looking Lu Xin's eyes directly. .
Moreover, Lu Xin actually saw little fear in her eyes, but more guilt and sadness.
"I actually knew all along..."
She spoke in a low voice, but did not say what she knew.
As if trying to sort out his chaotic thoughts, he slowly raised his head to look at No. 8, and said, "You are right to seek justice for the children in the orphanage, they really shouldn't be forgotten like this, But, you shouldn't be looking for Lu Xin's..."
"Really, because the escape plan at that time was originally proposed by me..."
She answered with some difficulty: "If it wasn't for me, how could it fail to escape, and how could something like this happen?"
"… "
Listening to her words, Lu Xin and No. 8 both fell into deep silence.
They were not surprised by this answer.
They naturally knew who proposed the escape plan back then, because they were all involved.
However, in the face of Mr. Xiaolu's deep self-blame, even No. 8 could not show an attitude of approval. When Mr. Xiaolu said these words, he couldn't help shaking his head, although he didn't think how to refute these words for a while. But he doesn't agree at all.
The escape plan fails, so is the person who came up with the escape plan guilty
Of course this is not right.
No one can question such a person...
…
…
"No, you have a lot of things you don't know..."
When Lu Xin and No. 8 both showed their subconscious attitude of denial, Mr. Xiaolu shook his head forcefully, preventing the two from speaking, and whispered: "It's not as simple as you think, it really should be I'm in charge… "
"At that time, I was just a person who was stealing and eating in a chaotic city..."
"I have no idea when I'm going to starve to death."
"That, that orphanage that is like a nightmare to you, is like paradise to me."
"My Healing Game"
"Only there can I have enough to eat, and I can even eat chocolate that is so sweet that I never even thought about it before. I can even sit in the classroom, read and write, like those children from rich families. Put on clean clothes…”
"… "
During Teacher Xiaolu's remarks, Lu Xin and No. 8 both kept silent.
Her words seemed to bring the memories of that time to the front, making people involuntarily immersed in it.
"You said, with such a good life, what was there to be dissatisfied with at the time..."
Teacher Xiaolu spoke slowly, her voice trembling slightly: "I don't know why I said that in the first place, I... I am with you, and I clearly know that this is the best life, but I always I deliberately tell you about life outside, I seem to be showing off, telling you how big and free the outside world is..."
Speaking of which, she couldn't help but her voice lowered slightly.
After a long time, she spoke in a low voice: "I didn't know at that time, what my pointless show off meant in the eyes of the children who were clean on the surface but were subjected to various experiments almost every day behind the scenes. Such a desire…”
"Later, an escape plan emerged..."
"It was me who came up with this escape plan accurately."
As she spoke, she couldn't help shaking her head subconsciously: "But in fact, it's not me who really wants to escape."
"I didn't need to conduct experiments in the first place, so why would I be thinking about running away?"
"Long before I brought it up, or rather, long before I started making those pointless shows with lies, a lot of older kids in the orphanage thought about it, I just found out what they thought, and first Just brought it up…”
"I even felt like a little hero for taking you out because I saw the pinholes and stab wounds on your body."
"… "
Lu Xin and No. 8 listened to her story, and their faces also showed confusion.
Even they had almost forgotten what happened before the escape plan actually came true.
At the time, it seemed that everything was natural and logical.
Too many children feel pain from the torture of endless experiments.
And as they grew up day by day, they gradually realized their power.
Although because of their young age, they have not yet given birth to the idea of truly rebelling against those adults.
But the idea of running away became more and more clear in my heart.
They want to leave this orphanage and escape this eternal torture and experiment.
It all happened as if it was doomed.
Who will remember how the idea came about at that time, and how was it determined...
Mr. Xiaolu actually remembers...
She actually remembered it so clearly, as if she hadn't forgotten a single bit.
Perhaps, because of the children's subtle competitive spirit, she used lies to describe the beauty of the outside world to them. Perhaps, she did feel like a hero because she could rescue these suffering children from this sea of misery...
But can these be considered errors
…
…
"Afterwards, the escape plan was confirmed among a group of children."
Teacher Xiaolu seemed to be breathing for a long time before slowly opening her mouth again: "But initially, there weren't so many people who wanted to escape at all, it was the older children who decided to escape, and they didn't want to take them with them. Children who are still young. Because they are young and ignorant, it is almost impossible to escape from the heavily guarded orphanage with them..."
"but… "
Her voice was trembling, and she continued with difficulty: "But I stopped them."
"I'm very brave, I'm really brave, I really feel that at that time, among you, I was the smartest..."
"I want them to run away with everyone, so that's a hero."
"Apart from these little kids, I even insisted on bringing Lu Xin... to bring No. 9 with me."
"… "
This is the first time she calls Lu Xin "Number Nine".
When she uttered these two words, she raised her head slightly, with indescribable self-blame and fear in her eyes.
"Those big kids actually don't plan to take you, because they're all afraid of you..."
Teacher Xiaolu explained to Lu Xin with some difficulty: "In the eyes of many people, you are more afraid than the orphanage..."
Lu Xin listened to these words in silence, then nodded lightly.
He naturally also remembered what happened in the orphanage at that time. The more sensible people, the older they were, the more afraid of themselves.
Therefore, it is the ordinary people like Mr. Xiaolu and the children like San Xiaozhi who get close to him.
And myself... I don't seem to be close to anyone.
In the world at that time, in my eyes, there was only curiosity and estrangement.
"But I insisted they take you."
Teacher Xiaolu spoke slowly, her eyes full of guilt.
"But it's not about being noble, really..."
She seemed to summon up the greatest courage to say these words: "I had to take you with me at that time because I knew that those older children were afraid of you, and I had a good relationship with you, so I took you with me. Those older kids will listen to me, I…”
"I even asked in front of them if you would really take us away, if you would listen to me..."
"I don't know how happy I am when you say yes with a smile, but the older kids don't dare to answer..."
"Finally they didn't dare to leave us. They didn't even dare to say the words that they wanted to give up their escape plan..."
"… "
No. 8's eyes gradually became confused.
Teacher Xiaolu's words seemed to just describe something they had known for a long time.
However, what she said now, as a party, the more he listened, the more confused he felt...
Lu Xin also fell silent, he sat quietly in the dark office, the state of the whole person was very strange.
"You all know what happened next..."
Teacher Xiaolu stroked her face lightly and whispered, "No one has ever blamed me."
"Everyone looked at me with apology and sympathy, as if I was the one who was hurt the most..."
"but… "
There was a cry in her voice: "I'm sorry for everyone..."
"All this was originally because of me, your pain was caused by me, and all the deaths of children were caused by me, everything you carried was because of me, and the monster in your heart was released. It's me who screwed everything up."
"The person who has been afraid to tell you the truth for so many years is still me..."
"… "
She looked at Lu Xin, tears streaming down her face, the countdown rolled quickly, and it returned to zero in an instant: "I'm sorry, No. 9..."
"Actually, I've always known what you look like..."
"For so many years, I have known for a long time, but I have never dared to admit it..."
"Because as long as I admit it, it means that I really screwed up what happened back then..."
"That's why I've always been reluctant to admit it, and I've always stubbornly believed that you were a gentle child in the orphanage back then..."
"But now, I can't deceive myself any more..."
"… "
"is that so?"
Listening to Teacher Xiaolu's words, Lu Xin was filled with endless confusion.
In his heart, an unusually complex emotion suddenly appeared, feeling very sad and painful.
Something that he had been holding on all along seemed to be shattered in an instant.
I have been working hard, living my life desperately, trying to convey my normality and improvement to others.
He thought he acted well and deceived everyone, and the point was, deceived her.
It was precisely in order to deceive her that he didn't want to say it when he knew she had misunderstood.
Only in front of her will she admit that something is wrong with her and try her best to heal herself.
But it wasn't until then that he understood.
It turned out that his efforts were useless, and he had been performing a clumsy and ridiculous performance.
…
…
Boom!
Also at this moment, there was a sudden violent tremor outside the teaching school. The whole city seemed to be shaking. The next moment, there were screams from the crowd in the distance. Eyes, bright red, with bloody eyes, those eyes are so close to Qinggang, they hang in the sky, looking at Qinggang City gloomily.
Hanging in the sky with the red moon, it looks like three red moons appear.