I know I'm not one to change my mind easily.
However, Gao Qi, I have never forgotten that I killed you with my own hands.
Although that process, I still can't think of it.
When I saw Gao Qin Jiuye for the first time, how flustered and helpless was my heart
I can't even define it myself.
Just like treating Gao Qiyou.
How many times on the rooftop of the school, when you are the center of attention, you are willing to set aside some time every day to quietly listen to me read "Faust" to you in a small voice that I can barely hear myself.
"The demon Mephisto said that this world is a sea of bitterness that will never be changed."
Gao Qi, if you were still here, would you still remember that day
You turned your head, the warmth of the sky melted into your eyes, and you smiled and said to me: "Ah Shen, if this world is really just a sea of suffering, then what do you think is the most painful thing?"
I'm a girl who doesn't blush, so even if you smile at me, I won't blush. But I will bow my head. As if I dare not look directly at your eyes that are enough to swallow me, I am good at bowing my head and talking softly to you.
So I can only say to you softly: "Probably, it's loneliness."
Then you say, as always, "What a, good answer."
I used to be very tired of the definition of time and love in romance novels, but I am sure that in the time spent with you on countless rooftops, I hope that time can be frozen forever.
However, I ended your eternity, and by the way, I also ended mine.
Now, there is another you in front of me.
In fact, Gao Qi, what am I not satisfied with? In fact, if I am here, I can share forever with you, right
Although, Gao Qin Jiuye is not you.
But, I can also say to myself that it's okay. Killing you, I can't tell myself it's okay, so what if the Forbidden Rift really gave me a chance to start over? In my heart, there is no one in the East, West, North and South Districts than you.
But, is it really better than... .
Lonely... .
If loneliness is the most bitter in this sea of suffering, then, is it me who is the loneliest, or you? Is it me, a mentally ill and lonely person who is excluded by others, or you, a person who still feels that no one understands you even though thousands of people are chasing you, who is the loneliest
Or is it... ...
For some reason, this rare and peaceful night in the dark, the rare opportunity to recall Gao Qi in detail, was suddenly interrupted by another person who had no intention of breaking into his thoughts.
Or is it... .
Nie Zun... .
Sure enough, you are the loneliest, right
I couldn't know my true intentions, couldn't figure out the bond with Nie Zun, so I slowly opened my eyes in the darkness.
It turned out that Nie Zun was not asleep, he was leaning against his favorite wall.
With his hands in the windbreaker pockets on both sides, his back was slightly bent forward, his feet were naturally crossed forward, his slender but strong back was leaning against the wall, his head was lowered, and he didn't know what he was thinking.
The jet-black fine bangs hanging on his forehead blocked his lazy, indifferent, deep and lonely eyes, and the collar of the black windbreaker stood up high. At this moment, his slightly lowered head made his sharp chin buried in the into the black collar.
In the darkness, I looked at Nie Zun carefully, from head to toe.
I don't know why, but the longer I watch it, the more strange it becomes. As if I had never known such a person before, an unreal sense of loneliness surrounded him and spread into my eyes.
Nie Zun, if this world is a sea of suffering, do you also need redemption
Why, do you always act like you don't need anything
Why, the she in me resonates with you
In any case, I can't find what you and I have in common except solitude. Or were you in the past, also suffered from the indifference and exclusion of others like me? But you are still stronger than me, I really envy you.
Jealousy of what you seem to care about.
I really want to know if you will have something you care about... ..
I stared at Nie Zun in the darkness, and this unexplainable but understandable question arose in my heart.
Then, as if he could hear what my heart said, Nie Zun, who was leaning against the wall not far in front of me, suddenly raised his head.
His indifferent starry eyes swept towards me casually and deliberately, meeting my slightly surprised gaze when he suddenly looked up. As if everything was taken for granted, he knew everything in his chest, facing me, he slightly raised one corner of his lips, and an incomprehensible smile flowed from his mouth into my eyes.
what's on your mind? His eyes seemed to be asking me.
So... I evaded the drooping eyes, what are you thinking about
"You two don't sleep, why are you looking at each other affectionately here?" A hoarse and low voice suddenly came from above the head.
I was pulled back to reality by this sudden interjection, and I was slightly taken aback. I looked up and saw the skein poking down from the upper bunk, the long straight black hair hanging down from the edge of the bed, and a pair of big empty eyes sweeping across. He glanced at me, and then at Nie Zun not far away.
"Don't be so scary, okay?" I rolled my eyes, then straightened up, trying to change to a more comfortable position.
Hang S actually smiled, although the stiff face was still a bit weird, but she seemed to smile a little more recently, and I got used to it.
"To be honest, you two should go to sleep, what is waiting for you and me tomorrow may be what's going on, my eastern district may be better, after all, I have the S tribe, and your western district has already fallen into the hands of others. , why don’t you hurry up to sleep well and go back to cheer up? Nie Zun, go to sleep too.” Hang S’s last sentence was addressed to Nie Zun.
Nie Zun unexpectedly obeyed, nodded, and then lay down on the spot casually: "Okay."
I was a little surprised, I glanced at Nie Zun who had already closed his eyes on the spot, and then at Nie Zun who was still smiling faintly.
For some reason, a long-lost intimacy flowed into my heart.
So I also smiled at the skein: "Okay, sleep now."
The night was safe and dreamless.
I had just woken up when Jappa knocked on the door.
"It's still three hours before dawn. Are we going to the district boundary now? But what about Mr. Huanqing, should we take him with us?" Jappa came in and asked.
Hang S and Nie Zun also got up.
"Is Guan Nie looking at them from the opposite side? Neither of them are awake?" I rubbed my eyes.
Jiepa nodded: "I haven't woken up yet, and according to my opinion, I may not wake up in a while. Mr. Yu Liang's whereabouts are unknown now. It's fine if Miss Truffle doesn't wake up. If we wake up, we have to retreat first. , and she can't go to Mr. Yu Liang right away, she will be very sad."
I sat on the bed and couldn't help raising my hands to support my head. Yes, if I really want to go back, it will be very difficult. Nie Zun and I want to protect Jiepa, and we also need to take the unconscious truffle and magic, hang and Guan Nirvana After parting from us in the East District, the two of us might not be able to take care of the three of us, but if we don’t go back, I don’t know what’s going on in the West District now, and Master Fan has disappeared again.
Hang S lowered his head and pondered for a moment, then said: "Well, Li Shen, since the current situation is in a dilemma, we might as well deal with it with no advance or retreat, although depending on the situation, some people may have died in my East District, but s I can still trust the loyalty of the tribe to me, since you and I have cooperated, I will not ignore you, so why not, you go back to the East Region with me, I have gathered people, and then I will make plans."
Seeing that I was silent, she went on to say: "I know you are worried about the West District, and the people you care about in the West District, who may have been persecuted now. But there is an abyss in front and back, and you have no choice. You go back to the West District , I am still worried here, you know, Li Shen, what kind of place is the Forbidden Split Zone, you don’t have time to take care of too many people, this is not our world, here, you have to learn to give up. Even if If you don’t abandon them, if they can’t protect themselves, then they won’t be able to survive in the Forbidden Split Zone in the future, and you won’t be able to take care of yourself, let alone protect them forever.”
Nie Zun looked at me, with a black light in his eyes: "She is right, I know you are worried about Master Fan, but now, you can't even protect yourself."
I was a little depressed by what these two people said inexplicably, and I didn't think much about it. Could it be that my worries are obvious. I put my face on my hands: "Okay, okay, listen to you, you tell me what to do, and I will do it."
Jappa interjected: "Miss Hanging, can you use that vortex to bring Mr. Huanqing and Miss Truffle at the same time?"
Hang Shui didn’t answer the question right away, but said, “Why do you call everyone Miss and Sir?”
I immediately curled my lips: "No, no, the only exception is when he is called Nie Zun."
Jiepa stood up straight, raised his hand to push his glasses, and said respectfully, "Because I'm a gentleman."
Pfft... ..
Although I admit that Jepa is indeed a gentleman, but seeing him boasting so calmly, I still can't help but spit out a mouthful of blood.
She gave a stiff smile, but I already understood that her stiff smile was actually from the heart. She waved her hand: "I'll go to the opposite room and put those two people into my vortex of air flow, but along the way, you have to protect me along the way, after all, I have to spend a lot of effort to support them."
Tsk tsk tsk, I was a little shocked to see Hang S acting like a baby.
So, after discussing with each other, several people retreated to the room in the school building in the south district, and prepared to return to the east district. Before leaving, Jiepa carefully put the bottle containing the big beetle into his backpack.
Walking in the southern area during the day, the few of us will naturally receive a lot of attention. After all, there is a "beauty" like Guan Nie, and a black god like Nie Zun, plus the shape of Zhenzi like Hang S.
Of course, if I am also eye-catching, it must be because of my beauty, not because of my big red dress and red hair. (Passerby A was kicked away by me before he could speak)
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