When spring came and flowers bloomed, her brother-in-law arranged a marriage for her.
She doesn't want to get married.
"They are a fake couple!" said the elder sister. "Lin Shisheng had a childhood sweetheart, and the wedding date was set. But his father-in-law got into trouble, and the girl's citizenship was confiscated. The person in charge of this case is your brother-in-law's senior brother, and he got to your brother-in-law through connections. Lin Shisheng's family is a hereditary fourth-rank assistant official, and he inherited the position at the age of fifteen. He is very capable, and now he is the commander of the left army of the Yulin Army, a third-rank..."
"That's even worse!" She shook her head like a rattle, interrupting her sister's words, "He's taking advantage of a favor to demand repayment. Even if I marry him, I'm afraid that Lord Lin will be filled with resentment and won't treat me well. Why should a benefactor become an enemy? Besides, I don't want to get married at all..."
My sister laughed when she heard this and said, "It was Lord Lin who took the initiative to bring this up."
She was stunned.
Her elder sister explained to her carefully, "Even if his fiancée is rescued, it's difficult for her to hide her identity after the incident with his father-in-law. How can she marry Lin Shisheng as his legal wife? Lin Shisheng knows this very well, and he doesn't want his fiancée to be wronged, so he came up with this idea - you and him become a fake couple, and after a year, you take the initiative to marry his fiancée into the family on the grounds that you have no children. You take the title of the legal wife, and you will have someone to rely on when you are old, and there will be incense and offerings when you die; the girl and Lin Shisheng become husband and wife, have children, and get what they want. How can a benefactor become an enemy? In fact, we helped him a lot!"
She still disagreed and said, "After all, it's taking the name of husband and wife!"
If Lin Shisheng wanted to do anything to her, she would be helpless.
My sister was silent for a long time and then sighed softly.
There was a commotion outside.
Chixiang looked at the door nervously.
Her sister smiled and said to her, "You take a rest first, we'll talk about this later," and then she stood up and was about to leave.
She was touched and held her sister's hand, saying, "Did something happen? You don't have to hide it from me. If I send someone to inquire, they will find out."
My sister thought for a moment and said with an unfathomable look, "Cheng Xu has been making a fuss these days. I'm afraid that I might accidentally reveal my whereabouts this time and he'll come looking for me."
Is that why my sister is in such a hurry to marry her off
She immediately said, "Then I will marry Lin Shisheng!"
The elder sister hesitated and said, "I was too anxious before. Now that I hear what you said, it's like robbing Peter to pay Paul. It may not be a perfect solution. Then you take a rest first. I'll go get rid of the uninvited guest."
She smiled as she watched her sister leave the inner room.
The noise outside became even louder.
At first she hid under the quilt, but later, seeing that the situation could not be settled for a long time and worried that her sister would be bullied, she asked Fan Liu to help her out of the door.
Fan Liushi refused, but she couldn't persuade her anymore, so she said, "The master has also come. Miss will be fine."
She asked Fan Liu anxiously, "Father, what do you say?"
"The master and the eldest lady have gone to the study." Fan Liushi said, "With the eldest lady here, the master won't blame you."
Yes. My father will not blame her, but he will blame my sister!
How can she sit still
Supported by Mrs. Fan Liu, she went to the study.
Chixiang and others were standing far away in the Chaoshou Gallery.
She signaled Chixiang and others not to make any noise and walked over quietly.
The father's voice could be heard faintly from the room: "… You are getting bolder and bolder! How dare you make such an important decision on your own?! What will you do if something happens to Shao Jin in the future? Who in this world dares to say that they can be thorough and never make mistakes? Can you guarantee that everything you say is right? Can you guarantee that Shao Jin will have no worries about food and clothing in the future and will not be bullied by others?"
My father's questioning became more and more severe. My sister's voice was wronged and helpless: "Dad, I, I have no choice! I can't just watch Shao Jin hang herself, right? I can stop her once, can I stop her twice, three times? What's more..."
Her sister's voice lowered, and she couldn't hear clearly, but her father's voice was like thunder: "What did you say? Say it again!"
She couldn't help but put her ear to the door.
"Shaojin, she, she had a heavy hemorrhage... She won't be able to have children again..." the elder sister choked and whispered.
She was stunned, just feeling a little surprised.
Or maybe she was young at the time and wasn't sad or upset.
"Pa!" The room was filled with the sound of a slap and the father's furious voice: "You evil creature! Look at what you have done! You might as well have strangled your sister to death with a rope!"
The slap seemed to hit her in the face, and the harsh words seemed to pierce her heart.
She couldn't help but rush in and stood in front of her father: "Dad, this is all my idea and has nothing to do with my sister. If you want to hit me, hit me. If you want to scold me, scold me. My sister agreed because she couldn't persuade me. None of this has anything to do with my sister!"
Her father looked at her with a gloomy expression, then looked at her sister, and walked away: "I will no longer care about your affairs. You guys take care of yourselves!"
She turned around and stroked her sister's face, which had already started to turn red, and asked her sister with a heartache: "Does it hurt?"
"It doesn't hurt!" The elder sister shook her head, tears flashing in her eyes, "It doesn't hurt, elder sister."
How can it not hurt
Especially being scolded by my father like that.
She loudly ordered Fan Liushi to fetch some water and said, "Apply ice water to the area and it will feel much better."
But the elder sister called out to Mrs. Fan Liu and said, "You are not feeling well. Go back to your room and lie down. I will be with you in a moment."
"Where are you going, sister?" She hugged her sister's arm in panic.
"Silly girl!" Her elder sister held her head and laughed, "Father slapped me in the face. How can the Cheng family give up if I don't show them a slap in the face? Don't worry, Daddy is not really blaming us. This is just his explanation to the Cheng family."
She doesn't believe it.
My sister always tries to smooth over everything in front of her.
But she felt that it would be good if she could give the Cheng family an explanation in this way.
But Cheng Xu was still making trouble.
She was afraid that the Liao family would find out.
Asked my sister: "How is the marriage with the Lin family going?"
The elder sister said, "I have discussed this with your brother-in-law, and we think it would be better to find you a better marriage!"
She believed her sister and stopped asking questions.
Who knew that Lin Shisheng would come to the door.
He is tall, handsome, and well-mannered, with bright and sincere eyes.
She doesn't like it.
Then weren't Cheng Lu and Cheng Xu also handsome men, looking gentle, humble and sincere
As if knowing what she was worried about, Lin Shisheng handed her a document and said, "If you don't believe it, let's write it down as evidence."
She kicked Lin Shisheng out.
Her sister came over and asked her breathlessly, "What did Lin Shisheng say to you?"
She handed the document to her sister before she had time to tear it up.
My sister sighed softly and folded the document into her sleeve.
Lin Shisheng went away and came back to ask to see his sister.
Her sister advised her: "Why don't you consider it?"
If Lin Shisheng looked more normal, she might feel safer.
She shook her head.
"Then I'll go report to Lin Shisheng." My sister stood up, but before she left the room, Chixiang ran in and said, "Grandma, Lord Lin and Master Cheng Xu started fighting."
Her elder sister hurried out, and she grabbed her elder sister and said, "Sister, you should accept the Lin family's marriage proposal in front of that man!"
"But?" My sister frowned.
She said, "Instead of hiding it after getting married, it's better to marry Lin Shisheng openly."
My sister thought for a long time before answering "OK".
In this way, she married into the Lin family. A year later, she took Lin Shisheng as a concubine, and she moved to the Lin family's farm to recuperate.
But when Lin Shisheng brought his newborn son to visit her, she looked at the little baby whose skin was white, tender and soft and whose eyes were as clear as the clear sky with a faint blue tint, and she felt an instant of heartache and regret.
If the child was still alive, he should look like this, right
He would lie softly in her arms, look at her curiously with eyes wide open, and suck his little finger unwilling to put it down... Although the child is Cheng Xu's, he was born by her and has half her blood!
At night, her tears wet the pillow.
But she couldn't say anything, couldn't tell anything, and couldn't even show the slightest sign of abnormality - in the spring of the year she got married, her sister and brother-in-law had a miscarriage of their first child, and her sister never got pregnant again after that.
If her elder sister knew that she regretted what she had done, where would that put her? What would her suffering be
She remembered what her sister said that day—if there is any retribution, it will be on me.
Is this retribution
The sins that should have been punished on her were punished on her sister and brother-in-law!
Her sister and brother-in-law are so innocent, but they are bearing the blame that they shouldn't have to bear for her.
Not only should she not regret anything, she also had to forget everything, as if those things had never happened, and live a good and happy life.
But when it was late at night and everyone was asleep, she couldn't help but think of the child and the night she lost him... It was as if she was tightly entangled by vines, unable to sleep and unable to breathe.
She began to eat vegetarian food and chant Buddhist scriptures, begging the Buddha to forgive her sins, to bless her sister and brother-in-law with children, and to let any retribution befall her... She only breathed a sigh of relief five years later when her sister gave birth to her nephew Liao Chengfang.
Now, the blood on her fingertips brought back those memories. Years of patience were like a broken bottle, and the deeply hidden secrets flowed out. Zhou Shaojin couldn't tell whether she was in her past life or this life, and she burst into tears hysterically.
It seems that this can help find an outlet for the pain that has been blocking my chest, so that the pain, regret, self-blame and guilt will not be so heavy.
“Sister, sister,” she leaned on Zhou Chujin’s shoulder and cried uncontrollably, “I regret so much, so much… But I can’t tell anyone… It’s me who doesn’t want the child… I’m afraid that telling you will make you sad… No matter how many sutras I recite or how much vegetarian food I eat, I can’t wash away the sins on my body… Why didn’t the Bodhisattva accept me… Why did he make me suffer like this again…”
※
I was a little sad to see a reader's comment saying that I was cold to the friends who supported my book. To me, the opinions of readers are very important. Sometimes after reading everyone's comments, I will check for omissions and fill in the gaps, and fill in the details that I didn't pay attention to before. It is because of everyone's comments that my writing will be more logical. This time, I may not have considered it carefully. I thought that everyone was an old friend and I just followed the old rules, but I forgot that new friends are constantly joining.
As I explained in the previous article, I almost didn't go to work in the first half of the year. After I went to work, there was a lot of work that I didn't do. Some colleagues helped me do it, and some I had to make up for it myself. In addition, the unit's archives work this year wanted to be upgraded to the provincial special level. Among them, the financial archives alone have been sorted since 1998. The Archives Bureau is very busy, and has not yet been able to schedule a time for our unit to help sort the archives, and the clerical and professional archives need to be sorted out by ourselves. Seeing that the inspection day is approaching, I am extremely anxious and impatient. I wanted to postpone the start of the new document for another month, but the outline of the new document was already in February. I felt itchy in my heart just thinking about it, and I couldn't help it, so I started the new document anyway.
As a result, I can't give up my work, and I haven't finished writing a new article. I really don't have the energy or time to manage the comment section. I can only secretly take a look at it on my mobile phone when I am at work. If it makes you feel unhappy, please forgive me!
I will identify a moderator to maintain the comment section as soon as possible.
Thank you again for your continued support!
Also: Thank you to the friends who recommended "Jinling Chun". My collection of "Jinling Chun" has increased a lot!
O(∩_∩)O~
※(To be continued)