State of Mind

Chapter 125: 12. Wandering

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I am a homeless man, nicknamed Xiongsi. As for the name, I forgot. In other words, in the long-term homeless life, I actually don’t need a name because you don’t need to contact people. What you do every day is sitting on the street. Watching people coming and going, picking up other people’s cigarette butts, if you are hungry, you can go to the trash can to find food. Now that people are rich, if you don’t hate it, you probably won’t be hungry.

Well, in fact, I also have a job. For example, I will go to the labor market to pick up some part-time jobs. Short-term jobs make me have a little money. This little money is enough for me to drink. Whenever I am drunk, I I would lie on a bench in the park and look at the stars in the sky, oh no, maybe it’s not that romantic. In most cases, I go to the foot bath shop and seek comfort in the arms of the massage girls.

I live poorly, but I am free, and even a bit happy. As for why I chose such a life, in fact... I can’t remember clearly. Well, in order for you to understand me in detail, I can recall... Oh, yes, It's love, it's all evil love.

Have you ever had a crush on someone

The secret love in school days is the purest and most beautiful, but it is stupid, like snowflakes in the sky, pure white, can not withstand the destruction, and then it is completely destroyed.

Oh, you ask me what happened. It’s very simple. I killed someone for my goddess. I killed a gangster who entangled her. As for the process, I can’t remember. All in all, I have a crush on the goddess, after school. Secretly following her, and as a result, I saw a little bastard pestering her and looked very familiar, so he went to help with anger. In the end, it seemed that he killed him by mistake. The goddess was scared away, and I was scared, and then I ran away, and never returned to my hometown after I ran away. I just wandered all the time, passing by, and more than ten years passed.

When I was young, I was so impulsive. One choice can determine a person’s life. I can’t tell whether it’s fear or pain. I stayed anonymous and became a homeless man. I had no name, no income, no place, nothing, and I started. Of course I didn’t get used to it at that time. I only ate leftovers and didn’t drink clean water. I got diarrhea and collapsed every day. But after a few months, I actually got used to this terrible life. Become a tramp who tickles and eats lice.

Slowly, I began to forget, and I couldn’t remember anything. Every day, I just lived numbly, wandering everywhere, poor and free, but also hard. Of course, the Beggars also came to me during this period, probably. When I talked about it, I asked if I didn't want to join the gang, so I could do it by a deputy gang leader last time, but I shook my head and refused.

I can't tell why, maybe... I'm still afraid.

Hunk's face often appeared in my dreams, with blood covering his face, staring at me, staring at me. He died, but he was also alive, always carrying me on his back, becoming a punishment for the impulse of a lifetime.

This is fate.

I often think.

When thinking like this, I was sitting in an unfamiliar back alley catching lice. Ever since wandering, catching lice has become my favorite "job". The lice door crawls on me in groups, and my main task is every day. , Is to catch them, and crush them, like crushing the bumps one after another in one's own absurd life.

The moonlight was like water, shining brightly on the ground, and there were waves of waves, a little dazzling.

I looked up at the moon and suddenly felt a little homesick-I haven't been back for many years, and I didn't dare to contact or know what happened to my parents. I just disappeared. The police couldn't find me, maybe even my parents.

When I thought of this, I suddenly regretted it. How should I put it? Just such a reckless decision made people sink into the bottom of the lake. The heart of a young man is always love is king, not to mention that there is no way to talk about love, that's it. On an impulse, a whole life passed, and... What happened to her from now on? That's the woman I supported for the cost of my life, she... Is she living well

Thinking of this, I moved my body and looked at the moonlight above my head. She must be alive and well. I thought, how can I not live well with the flowers that I have planted for half my life? Yes, yes, I was thinking, and suddenly I found that the sky was pattering and raining, and the half-turned shoes were getting wet. I shrank my feet angrily, thinking that this was just picked up from the trash can. It's here, anyway, it's semi-new, it's okay, it's too wet to wear.

At this moment, suddenly, someone called: "Hey."

I was taken aback and looked up, and a human head appeared on the opposite wall.

"what."

I was taken aback, stared, and saw that it was a man's face, oh, like a mouse's face, have you ever seen a mouse? I often see it in the sewers, with sharp-mouthed monkey cheeks and ghosts, but the face is very white. It is the exclusive white of the superior. Because of the white, it eliminates his wretchedness, leaving only a cold and cold cold.

At this moment, those cold eyes were looking at me, or rather, searching for something. When they saw me, the cold eyes suddenly lit up sparks, flashing "cracking" at me.

"you-"

He waved at me: "Come here, come here."

"What?" I was a little surprised, did not leave, just stared at him, the opposite wall is antique, very high, there are some small glass ballasts on it, and a bunch of small railings—according to my wandering experience, Such a house is very valuable, and it is the kind of place where rich people live. It is not a good thing for a man who lives in such a house to climb the wall and greet me in the middle of the night.

"Hello."

The squirrel-like man beckoned to me again.

"What's the matter?" I finally decided to stand up and approach him—I had some experience before. If such a man finds me, he will probably deal with some shameful things, such as burying a corpse, because I have a murder case. I never take this kind of work when I am physically, lest I can't explain clearly when I am called by the police, and the case is turned upside down.

So I didn't approach him, just stood there, scratching my head and pretending to be stupid: "What's the matter, sir, you haven't slept yet."

You know it's midnight, and most people don't climb walls at this time.

"Oh, come here, I have something to look for you." The squirrel man seemed to be aware of my vigilance, took out several hundred yuan bills from his pocket, and waved his hand at me: "Come here, come here, these are for you. "

"Oh?"

Looking at the money, I finally moved my heart. After thinking about it, I walked over and saw the squirrel man beckoning to me: "Come here, you climb the wall, I have something to do with you."

"What's the matter?" I asked warily.

It is certainly not a good thing to pay so easily, I don't want to get the attention of the notes.

"Oh, ha ha ha."

The squirrel man showed a sardonic tone on his face, meaning that a person who has nothing like you, what are you afraid of

That's not necessarily true.

I shrugged, held my chest, raised my head and said, "If you want to kill me."

"Kill you?" The squirrel man showed an exaggerated smile: "Why did I kill you? Are you worth my death?"

This is also true.

I finally took a step forward, staring at the squirrel face and said, "Mr., what are you doing?"

"Climb here." The squirrel man raised the banknote in his hand and waved at me like a banner.

I stared at the high wall and looked at it. If I want to climb over, it’s okay. After all, I’m still a strong man, but well...

"Sir, meet in Pingshui, why do you want my life?" I took a step back, spreading my hands.

The squirrel male looked suspicious on his face and suddenly laughed, like a sly fox: "How do you know I want your life? I said, are you worth it?"

"However, the railing is electrified." I pointed to the railing on the wall and shrugged, "I have been a gardener before, and I know that the walls in the garden are all powered on. If there is really a thief over the wall, , You will probably be electrocuted or corona."

The squirrel man heard this, haha, and suddenly shrank his head and disappeared. Soon, I saw flashes on the wall, a blaze of fire, and soon, it was dimmed again, and finally, the squirrel's head was again Stretched out, patted the top of the wall and said: "Okay, it's all right, if you don't believe it, touch it with your hand."

I walked forward and touched the wall, but there was no response. It seemed that he did shut the energized gate.

"money."

Suddenly, several hundred-yuan bills floated down from the wall and fell to the ground.

I looked down at the money, and suddenly thought that I hadn't eaten a big meal in a long time, and I haven't touched a woman. Well, it's for the money...

I stooped to pick up the money, looked up at the wall, touched the bumps on it, and climbed up little by little. Seeing that the squirrel man was waiting for me under the wall, and seeing me crawling over, I waved with joy: "Come on, come on."

"What's the matter?" I rode on the wall, suspiciously like a mole out of a hole.

"You come down." The squirrel man waved.

"You speak first." I asked stubbornly.

"Okay." The squirrel man's face flashed a bit fiercely, but he calmed down quickly, pointed to the villa and said: "You come here, I need you to take care of some garbage for me, oh yes some Shameful things. "

Sure enough.

With a cold snort in my heart, I climbed down from the wall and patted the gray on my hand: "Where?"

The squirrel man smiled and pointed to the second floor of the villa and said, "Go, where are we going."

I hesitated, nodded and said: "You lead the way."

The squirrel man rolled his eyes and walked forward quickly, while I followed closely. We walked one after another until we reached the back door of the villa. He entered the door very familiarly and walked up the steps. After moving his hands and feet a little, he followed him through the door and went straight to the second floor.

The open room on the second floor is a study room. There is an open cabinet in the study room. The squirrel man pointed to a large stack of money inside and said to me, "Now, this is for you."

I stood there in a daze, staring at the money-if one day, suddenly someone gave you a lot of money, what would you think

Now, this is not your ancestor's accumulation of virtue, years of amazing tells me, this should be money for life!

Money to buy life, understand

I stared at the wad of money, as if staring at my own life. I knew that if I took the money, it would probably be dead-there has never been a free lunch in this world.

But did I take it

I took it.

I acted like a greedy beggar, rushed forward, swept away the money and jewels inside, and put them in my pockets, full.

"Okay, you can go now."

The squirrel man held his chest and leaned on the door to look at, his face was indifferent, but his eyes flashed with the pleasure of revenge, so I'm sure—it's obviously not taking his money.

"Okay, I'll take it." After filling my pockets, I patted my chest.

The squirrel man nodded in satisfaction, smiled, pointed outside and said, "Then you can go."