The scary thing about the word "goodbye" is that it is both a reunion and a farewell.
Xu Tingsheng met Xiang Ning when he was 31 years old. He was sitting in the small shop he opened at the entrance of the alley that day. This small shop has been open for more than a year, and it can be regarded as Xu Tingsheng's "survival". Successive business failures have wiped out all the vigor in him.
Xu Tingsheng, who had already surrendered to his fate, no longer cared about business. Most of the time, he just stared at the computer screen intently.
"Boss, how much is this?"
Perhaps because he has been numb for too long, Xu Tingsheng has even forgotten this voice, no matter how much he loved the owner of this voice.
But he still remembers this headband, this style is a bit outdated, but he still has it in his shop, because the person she used to like to wear, showing her "Fuxi bone" which is said to be very precious. The forehead, and this one, is her favorite style.
Xu Tingsheng doesn't like to make eye contact with customers most of the time, as if he is afraid that others will see through his embarrassment, but he always looks up to the girl who bought this headband, not because he expects her to appear, but... well, he is expecting it , just look forward to this, look forward to it, just take another look at her.
The moment Xu Tingsheng raised his head, he saw that familiar face and the same familiar smile. Her changes were very small, very small, perhaps not at all.
The ancients described many emotions very well, such as "a sour heart". Suffering and bitterness rose in his chest, and tears flowed down uncontrollably in an instant.
"Why did you come back here?" Xu Tingsheng said. This is the city where she studied at university and also the city where they met and fell in love.
"I'm here for a training session." Xiang Ning said.
"Where do you teach now? I found out that you passed the exam, third in the written test, third in the interview, and passed the physical examination, but I couldn't find out which school you are in." Xu Tingsheng said.
"Wenyan Primary School."
Xiang Ning paid the money while talking, this process made Xu Tingsheng very at a loss, he tried to find some more money, Xiang Ning was polite and handed back some, Xu Tingsheng became even more embarrassed and at a loss because of this.
Xiang Ning walked towards the door.
"Are you married?" Xu Tingsheng asked involuntarily.
Xiang Ning turned her head, smiled, and shook her head slightly.
"Yes, can you stand for a while?" Xu Tingsheng stood up, raised and lowered his hands, but couldn't find where to put them.
"No. I just... want to see you again. Also, I want to tell you that I always thought you would come to me." Xiang Ning turned her head away. Before Xu Tingsheng could see her expression clearly, she had already held up an umbrella and walked into the night and in the rain.
Xu Tingsheng's mind went blank for about a minute, then he took out his mobile phone and made a call to Huang Yaming and Fu Cheng each. Xu Tingsheng said on the phone: "She showed up, just a minute ago, in my shop."
They all understood. As best friends for more than ten years, they knew Xu Tingsheng's situation over the years, including his relationship.
"Hurry up and chase." They said one after another.
"Chasing?" Xu Tingsheng said.
"Of course you chase after her. She will come back to see you, which means she is reluctant."
"good."
The same dialogue was carried out twice.
Xu Tingsheng stood up and knocked down the stool behind the cashier in a hurry.
"Pong..."
A few customers who were still wandering around in the store turned to look at him.
"Boss, don't you look at your store anymore?" the customer joked.
This sentence reminded Xu Tingsheng that in his current life and current situation, there is a voice in his head saying: "So what if I catch up with you?... What can I tell her? Why should I keep her?... Keep her and drag her down? "
"So what if we catch up?"
"So what if we catch up?"
"So what if we catch up?"
Xu Tingsheng sat down, as if the last bit of strength had finally been drawn from him.
…
Xu Tingsheng was born in a rural family on the outskirts of a small county. When he was 19 years old, he lost his father in an accident, and the family has been struggling ever since.
Xu Tingsheng was later admitted to a normal school and became a history teacher in a high school in Jiannan City after graduation.
He worked in this position for 4 years.
During this period, his younger sister graduated from university and was successfully admitted to the IRS. His mother was in good health and happy. Xu Tingsheng paid off the debts the family owed in the past few years, but he still couldn't afford the down payment for a house.
In 2011, when Xu Tingsheng was 27 years old, his college friends invited him to start a business together, running a small building materials company. In order to completely change his destiny, Xu Tingsheng chose to fight hard, resigned and went to sea.
On the third day after Xu Tingsheng resigned, he met his life's destiny—Xiang Ning, who was a junior (soon to be a senior) student at Jiannan University.
A year later, the company encountered difficulties, and one of the three partners absconded with money. Xu Tingsheng failed to start a business and was burdened with millions of debts.
Not long after, Xiang Ning graduated, successfully passed the exam, and became a primary school Chinese teacher, but she couldn't find Xu Tingsheng again.
Just like that, Xu Tingsheng suddenly disappeared from Xiang Ning's life.
Xu Tingsheng at this stage actually still holds hope, still dreams of a successful day, and goes back to find Xiang Ning. He misses and looks forward to it every day.
Until then, he failed twice in a row.
…
In 2015, Xu Tingsheng saw Xiang Ning again when he was 31 years old. At this time, he had just passed by, but he seemed to be in his old age, lifeless and destitute.
…
That night, Xu Tingsheng closed the shop early and wandered aimlessly on the street.
There are too many places in this city that have left their figures together, sweetness, laughter, happiness, and sadness. Xu Tingsheng seemed to be able to see that pair of people from before, familiar yet unfamiliar, they were holding hands, standing there from a distance, smiling and waving to him.
At an intersection, Xiang Ning once sat here and cried.
At that time Xu Tingsheng said to break up, Xiang Ning sat here crying, she left crying, Xu Tingsheng didn't catch up. That night, Xiang Ning called Xu Tingsheng, saying that she lost her wallet on the way back crying, and asked Xu Tingsheng to accompany her to look for it, and we broke up after finding it.
Of course Xu Tingsheng knew it was fake, but when a proud girl who was chased by many boys was willing to lie and play tricks for you, what else could she not be satisfied with? What kind of heart cannot be softened
That day, they searched for a long time, for a long time, pretending to be very serious and searching carefully, until they looked at each other and couldn't help but burst out laughing.
At another intersection, Xu Tingsheng once sat there and cried.
"Uncle" Xu Tingsheng doesn't like taking selfies, Xiang Ning refused the first few times he wanted to take a selfie with him, so she didn't insist anymore. Once when Xiang Ning went to the bathroom, Xu Tingsheng was in charge of looking at the bag, and was bored looking at Xiang Ning's phone.
He found that there was a folder named "Sweet" in Xiang Ning's mobile phone, which was full of photos of her and Xu Tingsheng, but Xu Tingsheng in the photos was mostly asleep, or looking at other places, doing on something else. Only Xiang Ning looked at the camera, leaned her face closer, and smiled like a flower... She secretly took these photos, secretly...taking a photo with her boyfriend.
That day Xu Tingsheng cried a lot, Xiang Ning came back from the toilet and was startled when he saw it, and then, Xu Tingsheng, whose face was full of tears and snot, dragged Xiang Ning to take a selfie for a group photo, which was so ugly.
…
Xu Tingsheng walked towards the couple, an Audi rushed towards him, the lights were so dazzling that he forgot to dodge.
The screeching tires rubbing against the ground made a sharp sound, and the beautiful woman in the passenger seat was screaming in panic.
Xu Tingsheng felt himself flying, his body was in the air, and he felt weightless.
There is also a feeling of pain, but the duration is very short.
Then, there is boundless darkness.