Han Wenqian almost lived in the hospital, even if he had to do the work, he tried to take it with him as much as possible to complete it, so he stayed with Xie He in the hospital and took care of him personally.
It's been more than a month since Xie He blinked, and Xie He didn't show any signs of waking up. This day, Han Wenqian sat by Xie He's bed, wiped Xie He with a wet towel as usual, and then stroked the young man's thin and pale cheek... bowed his head Kissed Xie He's lips lightly.
Sorry, I shouldn't have doubted you.
You haven't seen my confession yet, how can you just fall asleep like this.
And I haven't told you yet, I love you... You are my brother and the one I love the most.
[Ding, target Han Wenqian favorability +2, current favorability 92]
Han Wenqian stared at Xie He's quiet face, recalling the bits and pieces of the once warm days, his eyes were full of pain, he just stared at it, and finally fell asleep beside the bed for some reason caught. Since Xie He was injured, Han Wenqian never fell asleep again. He was often busy for several days and nights, only to sleep for a while until his body couldn't bear it. In a short time, the once cold and strong man's face was full It is the color of decadence.
The next day Han Wenqian woke up, his arm was numb, his first reaction was to look up at Xie He, wanting to see if he was awake... However, Xie He was still asleep, Han Wenqian was used to this Disappointed, he lowered his eyes to hide his disappointment, stood up calmly and opened the curtains.
Today's weather is very good, the golden sunshine seems to bring some warmth to this icy world, but... it can't shine into his heart.
Han Wenqian turned around and smiled softly at Xie He, "Your face is so pale, so it's better to get more sun exposure. When you wake up, I'll take you out for a walk. How can you stay in the house all the time? ?”
He talked to himself, then touched Xie He's hair, it was a bit long, maybe it should be trimmed.
Han Wenqian looked at Xie He reluctantly. He had something to do today. Although he would be back soon, it was difficult to be separated for only a second. Finally, he sighed and was about to turn around. Xie He's eyelashes trembled.
Han Wenqian's heart suddenly rose, his expression was tense and his breathing slowed down, lest it was just an illusion. He just stared at Xie He for more than ten minutes, and finally... Xie He's eyelashes moved again, and the long eyelashes slowly opened little by little, revealing a pair of hazy black eyes. eyes.
Han Wenqian never knew that in this world, there are people who can set off such a storm in his heart with just a blink of an eye. He suddenly felt his throat choked up and couldn't speak. In the end, only three trembling words came out of his lips: " you're awake."
Xie He stared blankly at the man in front of him, Han Wenqian's face was full of worry and nervousness, such a familiar look of concern, it seemed that he hadn't seen such a Han Wenqian for so long in his life, he remembered that he seemed to be in a car accident Well, maybe he's dead, this is heaven. That's why... Only then can I see the elder brother who loved him so much.
Xie He thought of the elder brother who loved him, and couldn't help showing a bright smile, looking at him with nostalgic eyes, and said: "Brother... I miss you so much."
It turns out that nothing has changed in heaven.
Han Wenqian's breathing paused for a moment. He thought about the various situations he might face. He thought that he would face Xie He's eyes of disgust and hatred or disappointment and indifference, but he didn't expect that Xie He's first words when he woke up would be "I miss you so much." you.
Smiled and said to him, he misses him.
Han Wenqian suddenly suspected that he had started to dream again, but this time the dream was very real, so real that it could be confused with real.
But he didn't want to wake up, because he never had such a beautiful dream again.
His dream is full of boundless darkness.
Han Wenqian closed his eyes slightly, and said in a low voice with suppressed strong emotion, "Me too."
Xie He smiled slightly, dimples appeared on his cheeks, he was indeed dead, and his brother said he was thinking about him too. He struggled to get up, only to realize that his whole body was weak and heavy. Why would he feel so uncomfortable even after he was dead? A look of grievance appeared in his dark eyes, and he said, "Brother, my hand hurts so much."
Han Wenqian's expression suddenly froze. These words seemed to pull him out of his dream ruthlessly with a pair of cold hands, reminding him that the mistakes he made still exist there, and they have not been erased at all, and the worse things... The consequences of mistakes are borne by the person he loves most.
Han Wenqian looked at Xie He, with deep sadness in his eyes, and he said softly: "After a while, when the injury heals, it won't hurt anymore."
Xie He didn't seem to understand this sentence, he showed a puzzled expression, "I'm already dead, why am I still injured?"
On his pale face, his dark eyes fixed on Han Wenqian, full of puzzlement inside, like an ignorant child who has not yet realized the cruelty of reality.
Han Wenqian understood in an instant, Xie He thought he was dead.
So this is why he said he misses him, what he misses is the brother in his memory.
Not his elder brother who hurt him all over his body.
Han Wenqian suddenly felt sore eyes. He held back the surging sadness, touched Xie He's cheek lightly, and said: "You are not dead, you are still alive, you are just injured."
Xie Hewu didn't believe it, frowned, shook his head and said, "You lied to me, if I didn't die, you wouldn't be so kind to me."
Han Wenqian closed his eyes in pain, and said in a hoarse voice, "It's really not dead."
He shook Xie He's hospital bed, and opened the window again. The laughter outside flowed in with the fresh air, and the world instantly became a little more vivid. Looking at his beloved, Han Wenqian couldn't help feeling the love in his heart Hugging him gently, she put a gentle kiss on his lips, and said, "Look, this is the hospital, your injury will heal soon, and everything will be fine."
Xie He looked outside, and after a while, he seemed to finally recognize the reality.
The pain on his body reminded him that the man's embrace is so real, the kiss has a burning smell... He is really not dead, he is still alive... The light in Xie He's eyes dissipated little by little, and finally turned into a piece of ice silence.
Therefore, all these good things are fake, just another deception. The more beautiful the surface is, the dirtier everything is hidden underneath, and the more cruel the harm will be.
The person holding him at this moment is not the elder brother in his memory, but a... man who ruined everything for him.
The closeness and kisses of this person reminded him of those terrible memories, which made him fear and loathe.
The smile on Xie He's face disappeared, his voice became soft and calm, and he said: "I know, let me go."
Han Wenqian was reluctant to let go of Xie He, he was thinking of him so much.
Xie He pursed his lips tightly, his eyes were full of pain, he suddenly said loudly hysterically: "Let go of me! Let go of me! I said that I will never appear in front of you again! This is not you Did you ask for it?! I've already got out, why don't you let me go!"
This excited and angry voice was like a sharp knife stabbing into Han Wenqian's heart.
Yes, this is what he said himself, and now he will suffer the consequences... Han Wenqian swallowed the bitterness in his mouth, fearing that Xie He's struggle would hurt him, he slowly let go. It's like... letting go of my only salvation...
His voice was astringent: "I won't move you, don't get excited..."
Xie He turned his head and looked at Han Wenqian. There was no nostalgia and smile on his face just now, only alertness and sadness, as well as complex hatred that seemed to be nothing. He said: "Why am I here, and why are you here? ?”
Han Wenqian didn't know how he spoke, he only heard his own dull voice, "You were injured in a car accident, so you are in the hospital, I... I just came to take care of you..."
take care of? Xie He didn't believe it at all. He remembered the last words Qin Ye said to him before the car accident, and Han Wenqian's ruthless calculations towards him. His eyes gradually revealed a look of extreme sadness, and his voice was soft: "You are worried that I will come back and rob you Really? You... You don't have to be so careful at all, I won't rob you, and I can't rob you either. "
Han Wenqian's lips trembled, "No..."
Xie He didn't want to stay here for a moment, he got up and was about to leave, only to find that he still had a tube inserted into his body, and his hands were all wrapped in thick gauze. pain.
Him, his hand hurt
Xie He's pupils contracted for a moment, and the panic overwhelmed him for a moment, and he was completely unable to think about other things! He raised his hand and bit the gauze with his teeth, he wanted to know what happened to his hand!
Finally, Han Wenqian could no longer turn a blind eye to it, and quickly went up to stop Xie He's movement, hugged him hard, and comforted him softly: "Don't move, don't move...you can take it off after the injury is healed...it can't be taken off now."
Xie He couldn't break free from Han Wenqian, his pale face was filled with endless fear, his voice trembled, "What's wrong with my hand? Why can't I move it? It hurts so much..."
When Han Wenqian thought of the doctor's words, there was only despair in his heart. How could he tell Xie He about such facts? His younger brother loves his hands so much and loves his music so much, but since then, he can no longer play the piano, and he can't even hold heavy objects...
Han Wenqian's voice was suppressed and stiff, and he finally just said: "I just got hurt a little, and I'll be fine when I get better, bear with it."
Xie He's eyes were empty, and under the extreme panic, people instinctively wanted to grab any life-saving straw, and asked tremblingly: "Really? Didn't you lie to me..."
Han Wenqian stroked his back and said, "I didn't lie to you, as long as you recover well, everything will be fine."
Xie He's body was still trembling.
Han Wenqian felt as if his heart was bleeding, but he still said: "You don't want to see me, I'll go out now, you can heal your injuries at ease, okay?" Now Xie He's emotions are very agitated, he doesn't want to stimulate him, because This would rather take a step back.
Xie He was silent for a long time, and finally nodded.
Han Wenqian looked at Xie He lovingly, and slowly let go of his hand. Seeing that Xie He had calmed down and stopped struggling, he gently took the door and went out.
He leaned against the wall of the ward, raised his head and stretched out his hands to cover his eyes. After a while, he got up and called the nurse. He was worried about thanking He for staying here alone.
The nurse came over soon, Han Wenqian explained carefully, watched the nurse enter the door and was about to leave, but before he turned around, he heard the nurse screaming, Han Wenqian's heart was raised for a moment without even thinking about it rushed in!
As soon as he entered the door, he saw Xie He bit off all the gauze on his hand with his teeth, his eyes were full of madness, because the action was too rough, the wound that hadn't fully grown began to bleed again, those terrifying eyes The hands are completely exposed, the joints are twisted and covered with scars, like ugly tree roots, blood drips down on the bed, and the snow-white sheets line the hands even more terrifying, and they are no longer as beautiful as they used to be...
Xie He fixedly looked at his hand, it hurt so much, it hurt so much, he just wanted to move it, he just wanted to straighten it, it didn't work, there was only heart-piercing pain...
Why did his hands become like this
Han Wenqian yelled: "Doctor! Where is the doctor!" Then he rushed to grab Xie He, preventing him from moving any more. He glanced at Xie He's hand, his heart was so painful that it twisted, but he still restrained himself not to lose his composure. He said to Xie He: "It just looks scary, and it will be fine when it's done."
Xie He seemed to be a little distracted. After a while, he turned his head and said to Han Wenqian: "You lied to me."
Han Wenqian wanted to continue to say something, but when he met Xie He's cold eyes, he suddenly couldn't speak.
Xie He looked at him coldly, and said: "You really are lying to me, I can't get better at all, you have been lying to me..."
He's never going to get better, he doesn't even have his hands...
The doctor finally rushed over, looking at Xie He's appearance, he couldn't help frowning, and wanted to re-bandage him, but Xie He was very uncooperative, and finally had to use a lot of sedatives to calm him down, and then re-gripped his hands Bandage well.
Han Wenqian looked at Xie He who had fallen into a deep sleep, and could no longer restrain the sadness and powerlessness in his heart. What should he do...
In the middle of the night, Xie He woke up again in pain. The pain from the drug addiction dominated him again. Han Wenqian didn't fall asleep at all. He quickly pulled the restraint belt beside the hospital bed and carefully put Xie He's hands and feet together. Tie it up, then wrap it around the chest and abdomen, fix him firmly on the hospital bed, and then feed him the medicine to replace the relief. Xie He soon became delirious, and at the beginning he couldn't stop shouting, save me, Help me... Then he said kill me, kill me...
This kind of Xie He made Han Wenqian feel so painful that he wanted to die, but he kept watching without moving his eyes for a moment.
This is the evil result he caused, he can't escape, no matter how painful he is... He just hates why he can't transfer these pains to himself, and let his loved ones bear it...
And regret, it is so useless.
[Ding, target Han Wenqian favorability +2, current favorability 94]
After a long time, Xie He finally calmed down again, his eyes were open with dilated pupils, and his mouth was half-opened.
Han Wenqian went to the bathroom and twisted the towel with warm water, then came over and gently wiped Xie He's face. Xie He seemed to have some reaction, he slowly turned his eyes, looked at Han Wenqian, and said, "You kill me."
Han Wenqian paused for a moment, then continued to wipe Xie He's face without responding to that sentence.
Xie He's eyes showed a look of pleading, and desperate madness, he said: "You kill me, a garbage like me should die, please... a garbage like me, useless garbage, should die Go to hell… "
He has completely collapsed, and he doesn't even have the last belief to support him.
In the night, Han Wenqian's eyes were inexplicably obscure, and he couldn't see how much sorrow and pain there was. He just said slowly, "You will survive, and everything will be fine, I promise..."
He hugged Xie He gently, and said in his ear: "Don't give up, I beg you..."
Xie He didn't listen at all, his consciousness was still not clear, but he couldn't move, and slowly fell asleep.
Only then did Han Wenqian hold Xie He's face, and kissed him tenderly. He was afraid that Xie He would hate his closeness when he was awake, and only dared to touch him like this when he fell asleep...
… … … … … … …
[Xie He: To be honest, what I need now is not a hospital...]
[444: Then what do you need? Food? Movie? Sex life? @_@]
[Xie He: I need to go to Nepal to find the supreme mage to learn magic, smiling JPG]
[444:...]
[Xie He: It's too boring and boring, I don't think I can continue to love him if this goes on, sigh JPG]
[444:...]Have you ever loved
Han Wenqian has been watching Xie He very carefully, not giving him any chance to hurt himself. After a few days, Xie He's mood seems to have stabilized a bit, and he no longer shouted that he was going to die, but silently Some of them don't speak, their reactions are slow, and their minds don't belong.
In addition to taking a lot of medicines for curing diseases, he also takes antidepressant medicines every day. He is tortured by drug addiction every day, and his spirit is getting more and more trance day by day.
Han Wenqian saw it in his eyes and felt pain in his heart, but there was nothing he could do.
It is such a simple matter to inflict harm, but it is so difficult to restore it, and it is exhausting to recover...
Such Xie He reminded Han Wenqian of the unforgivable mistakes he made every minute.
He can't help but think of the cheerful and optimistic young man in his memory, the carefree young man who was cared for by his family and who smiled brightly. He smiled like an angel, and he was like a prince when he sat in front of the piano. Go love him with your heart.
But now, he was neither human nor ghost, as pale as if he was about to disappear into this world at any time.
I can no longer see half of the original beautiful appearance... Even in those eyes, I can no longer see the original clarity. He is either in a daze or afraid, like a frightened little animal, living cautiously and difficultly.
As long as it is sunny, Han Wenqian will take Xie He outside for a walk, bask in the sun, and tie him to the bed at night.
After a while, the wounds on Xie He's body were almost healed. In fact, the wounds on his hands were basically healed, but Han Wenqian couldn't bear to let him see the hideous appearance of his hands, fearing that it would irritate him, so Let the doctor still wrap the gauze around him, and lie to him that it cannot be removed. Xie He seems to no longer doubt, no longer care, most of the time he looks sluggish, and becomes more and more timid.
His hands are now hard to hold a spoon, not to mention chopsticks, so Han Wenqian always feeds Xie He himself, every bite he feeds, Xie He takes a bite, and behaves very obediently.
But Han Wenqian knew that it wasn't that Xie He was willing to obey. He felt that Xie He was afraid of him, even though he never said it.
Because he could see the look of fear in Xie He's eyes.
In Xie He's eyes, he is the devil who made him have to endure such torture, and trapped him unwilling to give him a happy, let him continue to suffer the torture alive, so... he is afraid of him.
This kind of look always makes Han Wenqian's heart ache. He misses the young man who relied on and admired him so much, but he can't come back...
And he couldn't give up, couldn't watch the one he loved die.
That night, Han Wenqian took Xie He to the bathroom to take a bath for him as usual.
Xie He felt the most difficult time to take a bath every time. He had to bear this man touching his body and wrapping those shameful parts, which reminded him of those days of being bullied.
Xie He felt that Han Wenqian took off his clothes, and finally couldn't help trembling and whispered: "I, I'm fine, I can wash myself..."
Han Wenqian paused. He looked at Xie He's pleading eyes, let go of his hand without hesitation, and said, "Okay." Then he turned around and went out. He didn't leave, but stood at the door, listening carefully. Watching the movement inside, you can rush in only if something goes wrong.
But... Fortunately, it was quiet inside, only the sound of running water. Xie He didn't seem to have any dangerous actions, but the washing time was a little longer, and after another ten minutes, Han Wenqian couldn't help but said: "Xiaoxin, I Can I go in?"
There was no answer from inside at first, and after a while there was a weak voice, "Wait a minute, I haven't washed it yet."
Han Wenqian was inexplicably anxious. After a while, he still couldn't control his worry. Why did it take so long to wash... He held his hand on the doorknob, pursed his lips, and pushed the door open.
Seeing this, his eyes suddenly changed drastically, and he rushed over to turn off the faucet, and looked at Xie He with heartache... Just for a while...
It became like this.
It turned out that Xie He turned the water temperature to the maximum, and the high temperature water made his skin red and wrinkled, but he didn't seem to feel any pain at all. He curled up and squatted in the corner of the bathtub, blinking his misty eyes, and stared blankly. She said in a daze, "I'm so dirty, what should I do if I can't wash it..."
Han Wenqian felt as if a hand was strangling his throat.
The author has something to say: hee hee