Although Yu Fengnian and Xue Ling always told Xue Siyuan that there is no need to have too much pressure, as long as she is safe and healthy, Xue Siyuan is very strong in her bones. She hopes to respond to her parents' expectations, not just be a happy child .
Because of this strength, she has achieved good academic performance, and has developed a set of experience in managing interpersonal relationships, and she has done a good job of balancing.
If you only look at the surface, Xue Siyuan is undoubtedly the so-called victory group in life. Coupled with her outstanding appearance and decent conversation, she always gets high votes every time the class elects cadres. Error exists.
But no one knew that she gradually felt powerless, and a sense of burnout also emerged spontaneously.
Children's perception of their surroundings is intuitive. As they grow older, through the process of socialization, everyone will learn to judge objectively. When you find that some things are not rewarded by hard work, you will inevitably develop ego Suspect.
Not to mention adolescent students, even adults will inevitably feel confused and disappointed by this issue.
Most people either ignore it or avoid it, but there are still a few people who are deeply trapped in thinking traps, knowing that they should break free, but can't help but plunge into it.
Xue Siyuan was in such a situation.
The problem broke out in the second semester of the second year of high school.
With the same score, she directly fell out of the top 100.
It's not bad, but it makes people worry about Xue Siyuan.
"Have you encountered any difficulties recently?" Gao Xinhua, the class teacher, is a middle-aged woman who seems to be strict but actually cares about the students. "If you encounter any difficulties, you can discuss it with the teacher, and maybe you can find a solution?"
Xue Siyuan shook his head immediately.
"I'm fine, teacher." She said, "It's just that I didn't prepare enough."
This is a pretty standard answer.
If it were someone else, Gao Xinhua might use other methods to insinuate, but for Xue Siyuan, she always felt that the child had a clear mind and didn't need to waste her words.
"Okay." No more words, Gao Xinhua encouraged: "A perfect grade doesn't mean anything. It can even let you know where your problems are. It's a good thing to think about it from a different angle."
She stood up and patted Xue Siyuan on the shoulder.
"come on!"
Xue Siyuan's grades in the second model were even worse.
This time, he fell directly outside the two hundred.
She herself didn't know what went wrong, and her hands were shaking the moment she got the score sheet.
"Are you okay, Xiao Yuan?"
"Yes." Xue Siyuan smiled at his friend. "Fine, nothing."
"Well."
"What's the matter?" Seeing that the other party hesitated to speak, Xue Siyuan managed to pull himself together and asked, although he was in a bad mood and confused, "You seem to have something to say?"
"Hey, it's nothing, it's just... do your parents care about grades?"
Hearing this, Xue Siyuan was startled.
"Why..." She blinked unconsciously. "Do you think so?"
"It's just... It feels like you're under a lot of pressure. Didn't you realize it yourself? From the time I first met you to the present, the angle at which the corners of your mouth are raised when you smile has changed from this to this."
It can be seen that the other party is deliberately trying to make himself laugh, but Xue Siyuan has no strength to respond.
She found an excuse and walked away quickly.
If he stayed any longer, Xue Siyuan suspected that the air in that place would be sucked up by him.
A balloon is buried in the body, and a large amount of gas is being injected, and it may be detonated at any time.
In the end, Xue Siyuan simply ran.
It turned out that no one could see it.
Many people may even have seen it.
If even the teachers and classmates could detect something was wrong, then there was no reason why Yu Fengnian and Xue Ling couldn't detect it.
No wonder they have been very cautious about themselves recently. There were even times when Xue Siyuan was tired from reading and came out to rest. He saw his parents sitting in the living room with sad faces and talking in a low voice. It will make people think that they are dazzled.
Xue Siyuan's mood has been depressed for a long time, and he is unable to distinguish some changes in the outside world.
However, being touched by someone at this time, everything became extraordinarily clear as if opened to a perspective.
"call!"
She sprinted for the last segment.
When the brain is hypoxic and the whole person is in a state of suffocation, he reluctantly stops.
Bending down and supporting his knees with both hands, Xue Siyuan panted heavily.
She didn't realize that she was crying until she felt wet on the back of her hand.
Tears fell uncontrollably like broken pearls.
One after another, they turned into traces all over the face.
Xue Siyuan squatted down violently, he didn't care where he was, he didn't care about being seen, and he didn't care whether the lunch break bell rang or not, he just wanted to cry regardless.
You don't need any reason, just cry to your heart's content.
The passage of time suddenly lost its meaning.
Xue Siyuan couldn't tell how long had passed. She didn't wear a watch, and her mobile phone was left in the classroom. She just wanted to come out to get some water before lunch break, but she didn't expect such a twist in the future.
She never felt that she was a fragile person, but it was only at this moment that she realized that all her strength was just an illusion in disguise.
When you deceive others, you also deceive yourself.
but…
"Do you feel better?"
The male voice suddenly appeared in her fragmented world, breaking the huge barrier in Xue Siyuan's heart created by the crazily growing vines and thorn forest.
She looked up sharply.
At that moment, even though he couldn't see what the man behind the light looked like, Xue Siyuan knew that he would never forget this moment in his life... this moment, this person.