On the night Qin Lou returned home, there was a heavy rain in Q City. Thunder roared in the dark sky, and the lightning that split the clouds was like a devil's scythe.
Those hoarse and twisted laughter passed by his ears, torturing and tearing his consciousness again and again.
The figure in front of him was pitch black, and the cold wind, like a blade, seemed to be blowing from hell. They blew over him one by one, tearing his flesh, shredding his tendons and bones, and then rushed into his chest, turning the blood-red heart into a ball of meat paste.
Qin Lou walked numbly among the rainstorm, thunder and the crowd.
The laughter of the demons that had torn him apart once again came after him. They roared and snarled unwillingly beside him, but there was no response and no trembling.
Madmen don't laugh.
Just silence.
The madman had never been so quiet.
That was before his world completely fell apart.
Outside the terminal, Qin Lou walked along the airport highway.
Cars honked as they passed by him, and the huge beams of headlights pierced through his body and the darkness in the rain like arrows.
Curses and roars were heard everywhere—
"Are you sick? Why are you walking here?!"
"Are you looking for death?"
"If you want to die, go away!!"
… die
Qin Lou moved his fingers.
He stopped in the rain and looked up at the sky above his head. The clouds were very low, and it seemed that they would come down at any time and crush everything here. Then the sky would collapse and the earth would collapse.
That's probably not bad.
That way he could be buried with her in one huge grave.
We will meet again in eternal sleep.
Right, doll.
"—Master! Master Qin Lou!"
In the rain, a car braked suddenly beside Qin Lou. The person who got out of the car opened a huge black umbrella and ran to Qin Lou in panic and anxiety.
"It's raining so hard, please get in the car, Master!"
Qin Lou walked around him and walked into the rain without any expression.
The man chased after him in panic: "Master—"
"Qin Lou!" An angry and hoarse voice appeared in the rain.
"Mr. Qin, please don't get out of the car. Your surgery just ended not long ago. You have to take care of yourself."
"Qin Lou!"
"… "
The figure didn't even pause once, as if it had lost all senses and perception.
The young man walked numbly in the rain, his upright shoulders slightly hunched over by the pressure he had felt without him noticing.
Like a walking corpse.
Qin Liang pressed the car door, his hands tightly clenched, veins popping out on the back of his wrinkled hands. His eyes were cloudy and red.
"Song Shu will be buried tomorrow - you don't even want to see her for the last time, right!?"
The figure in the rain was startled.
Stop.
After a long time, without any warning, the boy in the rain suddenly bent down - he squeezed out a hysterical roar from his body.
It hurts.
Doll, I'm in so much pain.
Why does it hurt so much
The boy hunched over tightly, holding his chest and abdomen, and bent over. The only sound in the thunder and rain was his desperate roar. A bloody taste came out of his throat until he was so hoarse that he couldn't make any sound.
He finally couldn't hold on any longer and knelt in the accumulated rain.
The laughter in her ears finally became the girl's most gentle comfort.
I am here.
I will save you, Qin Lou.
Why should I be afraid of you
They are not me.
Don't be afraid, little lunatic.
I'm here.
…
You lied to me.
You lied to me.
You lied to me...
The heavy rain at the end of August has lasted for two days. It seems like it will continue until the end of the world and there is no way it will stop.
In the evening of the 29th, Jia'an Cemetery.
In front of a newly built tombstone, people wearing black clothes and holding black umbrellas stood sporadically. A fifteen or sixteen-year-old girl with a buzz cut stood in front with a blank expression.
There was a low murmur from the crowd behind her:
“This is the only child left.”
"I heard that she is a cousin, otherwise I really don't know how she will live in the future..."
"Yes, the money Bai Song owes is still missing and cannot be recovered. If it were a direct descendant, wouldn't the creditors go crazy?"
"Thinking about it this way, it's a good thing that Song Shu left, otherwise those people would probably force her to death."
"Speaking of which, I heard that the person responsible for the car accident was a drunk driver. You said it was neither too early nor too late, and he just happened to hit this child..."
"Shh, don't say these things casually."
“That’s right.”
The sound was wet by the rain and blown away by the wind.
The sound of mournful music floated heavily in the cemetery.
Several figures walked up the stone steps.
"Hey, the Qin family is here."
"Mr. Qin is really kindhearted. I don't know how much suffering the Qin family will have to endure this time, but he is still willing to come and see this child."
"Bai Song is really a piece of shit. Mr. Qin treats her so well..."
"Yes, she got into trouble and died, but the Qin family was ruined by her."
Luan Qiaoqing, who had been standing there frozen, turned around. In the rain that blurred her vision, the Qin family slowly approached.
The leader was a young man.
He was wearing a black Mao suit, had a cold white complexion, and dark eyes. His handsome features were pale and numb, without any emotion.
Luan Qiaoqing stared at him blankly for a few seconds, and suddenly broke down.
She rushed over, clenched her fists and punched the boy's shoulders and body, crying as she beat him:
"Why did you come back just now? Why didn't you answer my sister's call? What's the point of you coming back now? What's the point? "
"… "
The people accompanying the Qin family came up to stop them, but were stopped by Qin Liang.
Qin Lou neither dodged nor evaded, nor did he make any excuses.
He stood there numbly, staring at the stone tablet motionlessly.
Her name is engraved on the stone tablet.
There was also a small photo of her, he didn't know when it was taken. In the black and white frame, the girl was looking at the camera quietly, her eyebrows and eyes were as familiar to him.
He seemed to still be able to recall the warmth left in her palm when she gently touched the top of his head that day at the airport.
Don't be afraid, little lunatic.
I'm here.
… It must be very cold down there.
The little lunatic is here to pick you up.
Can I take you home... Doll
The boy blinked slowly.
Luan Qiaoqing in front of him squatted down exhausted and cried bitterly on the gravel road beside the tombstone. Qin Lou then slowly moved his legs and walked towards the newly built tombstone.
In these few short meters, he seemed to have walked through his entire life.
When he finally stopped, the boy could no longer hold up his hunched body and fell to his knees in the soft, wet soil.
He touched the cold, sharp edges of the tombstone. No tears could flow from his dry eyes any longer. They were just red, deep red, as if they were about to bleed.
"Song Shu..."
He tried desperately to squeeze out a little sound from his throat which had been hoarse and unable to utter a single word.
"Song Shu..."
His fingers were clasped tightly on the tombstone, and blood slowly seeped out from between his nails.
"Song Shu..."
He finally bent down to the lowest position, his pale forehead pressed against the wet mud, his voice was dry, hoarse, and mournful. In such a low and soft voice, it seemed as if countless people were crying heartbreakingly.
The crying tore his insides to pieces.
There was only a pool of pus and blood left under the body.
On August 29, 2010, Song Shu was buried.
The part of Qin Lou's body that was most human-like also died on this day.
After that day, Qin Lou fell seriously ill and was bedridden for a month.
Qin Liang's doctor friend went in and came out sighing. Then the two old men in their sixties quarreled angrily in the study for half an hour.
Soon word spread among the servants that the young master, who would be 18 next year, was no longer alive, and the doctor had asked Mr. Qin to prepare for his funeral, which led to the quarrel.
Then Luan Qiaoqing came to the Qin family.
She said she wanted to show Qin Lou something, something left by her sister that could save Qin Lou.
The Qin family servant hurriedly invited her in.
In the dim bedroom, on and off the hospital bed, the two people who had not been seen for a month had become thinner and looked completely different.
Qin Lou becomes even more powerful.
The young man lay on the thick and soft quilt, his face pale without a trace of blood, his eyes closed, silent and motionless, like a dead person.
Luan Qiaoqing's last bit of resentment towards him also dissipated. She reached out and placed a crumpled piece of paper on the bedside, and said in a hoarse voice: "I only met my sister once after she was seriously injured in a car accident and was admitted to the hospital. She couldn't even hold the pen steadily at that time, but she still wrote this to me and said she must give it to you... You can read it yourself."
After Luan Qiaoqing finished speaking, she turned and left with red eyes.
The room fell silent again.
It was dead quiet.
After a long, long time, a terribly thin hand slowly stretched out from under the quilt and took several attempts before finally picking up the note.
The handwriting on the note was crooked in the dim light of the bedside lamp. But it looked like he was taking notes, and he wrote 1 and 2 carefully.
1. Take good care of her
2. You have to live to 88, otherwise we will both... lose out.
"… "
The boy's numb pupils shuddered slightly, then his arms, and then his body. The trembling was almost like a convulsion, and his face looked hideous.
He lowered his head silently.
"good… "
The corners of the boy's dry mouth curled up slightly.
"I promise, you."
He just listened to her.
This was the last time he promised her in his life.
***
Nine years later.
The rooftop terrace of "vio capital" is a private open-air party.
Kang Linshen, whose face was flushed from drinking, raised his cup and laughed, "It turns out that Mr. Qin is so unsullied by women because of his first love—tsk tsk, there are rumors outside that you have a secret!"
"Lin Shen, you've had too much to drink... Stop talking!"
His friend next to him pulled him, looked uneasily at the place where Kang Linshen was raising his glass, and forced a smile.
"I'm sorry, Mr. Lou, Lin Shen, no, the second young master of the Kang family is just like that. He drinks without restraint. Please don't bother with him."
"What are you afraid of? Isn't he telling the truth?"
A meaningless sneer came from the sofa.
Cascading down on the soft leather sofa was a young man in his mid-twenties. Even the darkness of the night could not conceal his purple-dyed hair.
He leaned forward and sat up from the shadows, revealing a face that was so handsome that it formed a sharp contrast with the purple hair—
She had a cold white complexion, long and slightly upturned eyes, a high nose bridge, thin cheeks, and a good bone structure. She was obviously smiling, but there was an indescribable coldness between her eyebrows.
"Boss Qin is still easy-going."
"If everyone is so friendly and easy to talk to like you, Master Lou, there will be no business that cannot be negotiated, right?"
"Hahaha, that makes sense..."
Everyone was toasting and chatting, and half the night passed in the drinking and entertainment.
As the night went on, people dispersed and only the waiters were left at the open-air party to clean up the mess.
The night wind is quiet.
The specially invited singer sang the last song he composed in a low voice:
"I let myself be degraded."
“Death is the destination.”
"Degradation is liberation..."
Qin Lou, who was alone, lay on the sofa and suddenly laughed. He laughed so hard that he almost cried.
By the time he stopped, the singer and the waiter had already disappeared in fright.
Then the sofa next to him sank.
"What are you laughing at, so happy?"
"… "
Qin Lou glanced back and sneered, "Xiao Han has changed her ways and won't attend parties like this anymore, so why did you come over right before the party was over?"
"I heard that you went abroad to look for a passerby in the blurred background of a newspaper photo and still couldn't find him for a month. Am I not afraid?"
"What are you afraid of?"
"I'm afraid that one day you might become depressed and jump off the 23rd floor with a bottle of wine in your hand."
"Ha ha ha ha… "
Qin Lou burst into laughter and laughed for a long time before stopping.
Han Shi next to him couldn't laugh and kept looking at him with a frown, "Song Shu has been dead for nine years. You should have let it go. Can't you let yourself go?"
Qin Lou looked indifferent, as if the one who had just laughed was someone else.
His eyes jumped across the goblet in his hand and fell on the large red LED screen at the end of the rooftop not far away.
There was a blood-red light flickering on it.
After staring for a few seconds, Qin Lou silently raised the corners of his mouth.
"If one day I really jump, remember to smile - because that means I have let go and forgiven myself."
Han Shi sighed, gave up trying to persuade him, and turned back.
"Okay, when that day comes, I will definitely go to your funeral and laugh my ass off. So before you get over it, tell me what else I can do for you then."
"… "
Qin Lou put down the wine glass in his hand, the smile on his face faded, and his tone became serious.
"When that day comes, please help me go to her grave and tell her."
"say what?"
"Just say..."
Qin Lou showed a longing smile, and at that moment his profile looked like that of a boy of seventeen or eighteen years old.
"Doll, the madman finally came to pick you up."
—
From now on, you are both hell and heaven.
Prologue: you'reredemption, end.
postscript
"After you're gone, everyone and everything in this world, including myself, including life and death, are all... boring."
—Qin Lou
The author has something to say: All comments in the comment section of this chapter will receive a red envelope~
Thank you to the little angels who voted for me or irrigated nutrient solution during 2019-11-25 16:50:27~2019-11-26 21:13:22~
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