“They said, one day you’ll leave me.”
"… "
"Will you, doll?"
"… "
The study was quiet for a long time.
The wind rustled the pages of the book by the window.
Qin Lou saw the girl nod. She looked at him, her dark pupils bright and clean. The girl said softly, "I can do it."
"――!"
"No one won't leave, Qin Lou."
Qin Lou looked at her in a daze.
The little madman seemed to be frightened silly, not crazy at all. His eyes were wide open and so empty that it seemed as if tears were about to flow out.
But he never cried again after he was 7 years old. He no longer knew how to cry.
So he just asked carefully, his voice so soft as if he was afraid of breaking or shattering something. He suppressed his fear and dread to the deepest level:
"But aren't you my doll? I don't care about others, it doesn't matter if they leave or not... But you are my doll, you are mine, why would you leave--"
The boy's mood became impatient again.
Song Shu thought for a moment and said, "The teacher said that we will go to high school and then enter different universities. We will be far away from each other, make different friends, and have different..."
"I will only have you!"
Song Shu was stunned, "Why?"
“Because--because…” The young man was rarely able to speak.
Song Shu looked at him quietly, "You are so smart, much better than the teachers, and you will be even better in the future. There are many people who want to be friends with you, you won't just have me."
“…” Qin Lou was so angry that he didn’t want to talk.
"But you have to start going to school normally first," Song Shu thought, "You can't lose your temper like you do at home. If people are no longer afraid of you, many people will become your friends."
"… "
Qin Lou was extremely angry. He smiled coldly and turned away.
He must make this elm doll regret it.
must!
Two months later, when the third year of junior high school started, Qin Lou demonstrated what "obedience" meant.
He went to school, slept in every class, and always ranked last in the exams. He also made friends, and the problem students who gave the teachers a headache became his little followers. Whenever they showed up, they would cause chaos in the school in minutes.
After a while, everyone praised him: The young master of the Qin family is really born with a natural talent in being a little bastard.
However, no matter how bad the young master was, he had been arrogant and domineering for half a semester, but he never did anything out of the ordinary - the whole school knew that this was thanks to a little girl named Song Shu from Class 3.
The little girl is quiet and doesn't like to talk. She carries a sketchbook wherever she goes. She looks pretty and cute, but she rarely shows any expression. In addition, her academic performance is so good that she has no friends... In general, there is always a gap between her and other classmates.
But a more important reason is probably that she knows Qin Lou and they are familiar with each other.
Qin Lou only listened to what this little girl said.
Every time a group of troubled teenagers wanted to cause trouble or start a fight, the news would somehow leak to the little girl.
So, the grove behind the school, the small lawn in front of the playground, the small square next to the Music and Art Building, the rockery fountain opposite the gymnasium... No matter where the venue is, the little girl always shows up in time before the show starts.
And as soon as he showed up, he took away their little bastard leader.
The small group once suspected that there was a traitor among them and reported each other to Qin Lou several times.
Unsuccessful.
Until today.
Seeing that the two sides were about to fight, the little girl hadn't come yet. The group of troubled teenagers were extremely excited and eager to try, and frantically hinted that Qin Lou could take this opportunity to avenge his previous shame -
"Wait a little longer."
The young master was chewing a piece of dogtail grass, sitting on a platform two or three meters high, swinging his long legs, and staring absentmindedly in the direction of the teaching building.
Then the small group had an epiphany.
It's not that they never make it in time, it's their brother Lou who tipped off the girl himself, and then timed the time for her to come and "pick him up".
…Pah.
The troubled teenagers were very angry.
But they dared not speak out.
Because they found that as time went on, the smile in the eyes of the boy sitting on the high platform gradually darkened. The emotions revealed in his eyes were beyond their age and it was scary to look at.
Before that bit of darkness could materialize, the person sent to inform Song Shu came back, and he ran to Qin Lou's side, panting.
"People in their class said that Song Shu was called to the teacher's office. I waited for a long time, but she didn't come back."
"… "
The last bit of smile in Qin Lou's eyes faded.
He supported himself on the platform with one hand and jumped up.
The high school students who had arranged a fight with them had long lost their patience. One of them walked forward with a sneer, "What's wrong? Are you scared? Are you planning to escape from the battlefield—"
Before he could finish his words, the expressionless boy walked past him and punched him in the stomach.
The high school student's face twisted, and without uttering a word he held his stomach and hunched over like a shrimp.
The scene without any prelude made several high school students confused. They turned around and wanted to go up, but their feet seemed to be stuck in the mud and couldn't be pulled out -
Qin Lou glared at them, his handsome face, which had not yet completely shed its boyish innocence, now suppressed an emotion.
ferocious.
It was the kind of ferocity that only a wild beast whose territory was violated could show, the kind that could tear everything to pieces, including itself.
No one dared to stop him. They watched helplessly as the boy walked towards the teaching building without looking back.
"Fuck, what's going on..."
"Isn't it just that his little girl was called to the office by the teacher? This, this is not a big deal."
"His eyes are really scary, like a madman."
"Really? You think so too, right? I've long said that this kid from the junior high school is mentally ill. Every time I look at him, he looks like a mad dog..."
"Stay away from him."
"Um."
"… "
"Song Shu, you are a good kid. The teacher knows that you and Qin Lou have known each other since childhood and have a good relationship, but some people may not be suitable to be friends forever..."
Song Shu stood in the head teacher's office, listening with his eyes downcast expressionlessly.
There is a pot of flowers on their teacher's desk. The pot is small and delicate. It hasn't bloomed yet. The leaves look like roses. It won't last long if it's planted like this...
"Song Shu, did you listen to what the teacher said?"
"… Um."
"Do you know what to do?"
"Um."
"Then the teacher is relieved. You have a bright future ahead of you. Don't let yourself be held back by making the wrong friends for a while. Otherwise, you will regret it in the future. Do you understand?"
"Um."
"Okay, then you go back."
"Goodbye, teacher."
Song Shu turned around and walked out of the office.
She didn't really listen, nor did she really need to. She had heard this countless times since the beginning of the third year of junior high school.
Every teacher told her, "Qin Lou is not the same kind of person as you, you should stay away from him", and "Students like Qin Lou are bad to the core, you should not get yourself involved."
At first, Song Shu would tell them that without Qin Lou, she wouldn't be who she is today, but later she was too lazy to argue.
Because they won’t understand.
Those who don’t understand will never understand.
Song Shu walked out of the office, turned around to close the door, and turned around again.
Then Song Shu was stunned.
In the corridor outside the office, the boy raised his head.
He looked at her with red eyes, perhaps because he was too emotionally suppressed, the pale blue veins on his forehead bulged slightly. His hands hanging by his side were clenched into fists.
The eyes and appearance are terrifying.
“… I heard you.”
There was a little hoarseness in the boy's voice. It was more of pain and depression. But he smiled.
"So that's why you asked me to make friends because everyone told you that you should stay as far away from me as possible? -- You finally realized this, but don't you think it's too late to agree to them now?!"
Song Shu reacted.
"I didn't promise..."
"But you know what?"
The boy interrupted her. He took a step forward, grabbed the girl's wrist tightly and held her, then leaned over and grinned -
"They are absolutely right."
"… "
"You should have left long ago."
"… "
The boy's strength was so great that he seemed to crush the girl's wrist. After saying the last sentence, he froze for a few seconds before lowering his eyes in mockery.
The corners of his eyes were so red that blood seemed to be dripping out.
“…Who cares?”
He shook off the girl's wrist and turned to leave.
"Qin Lou."
“…” The young man paused and quickly moved forward again.
"Qin Lou."
“…” He turned a deaf ear.
"Qin Lou."
"… "
"Qin Lou."
“――”
Qin Lou's steps suddenly stopped.
After a few seconds, he turned back with a stiff back.
The girl stood still.
She looked at him quietly, her eyes bright and soft.
"I've been standing here. I haven't left."
"――!"
An instant of emotion like a wild beast tore through the depression and silence in his eyes. Qin Lou turned around, grabbed the girl's wrist and pulled her into the tool room next to him.
The door slammed shut.
There was no light in the tool room, it was pitch black.
I couldn't see anything in the darkness, I could only hear the boy's suppressed voice that was hoarse -
"Why don't you leave?"
"… "
"Didn't they persuade you? What they said was right, about you and about me - every word they said was right!"
"Qin Lou."
"You should have listened to them a long time ago. I will definitely become scum and villain in the future! You and I should never have been together!"
“We’ve always been together.”
"That was in the past! What about a few years later? Didn't you hear what the servants at home were talking about? They were all discussing when Bai Song would take you away - how could she let you stay with me!"
Qin Lou gasped. In the darkness, he was not afraid that his hideous appearance would scare the girl. He used his most violent tone to threaten and intimidate her.
"Wait a few years, then you'll wear a little white dress with a cinched waist, showing off your slender white calves, and have the most beautiful figure and face, and a scum like me will only drag you into my car on a drunken night, rip off your skirt and bite your lips to the sound of a whistle—"
He lowered his head with a hoarse voice.
"Do you understand dolls? I'm hopeless. People like me are destined to be buried in the mud and rot with maggots!"
"… "
The darkness of the tool room remained silent for a long time.
All that could be heard was the boy's exhausted breathing after his hysterics.
He lowered his head.
This was the first time Qin Lou felt so sad in such a long time, so sad that he felt like he was going to cry.
He was finally going to lose his doll. He deserved to cry.
Qin Lou buried his head even lower.
Then he felt a hand rising up and ruffling his hair very gently.
"I will save you, Qin Lou."
"… "
Qin Lou's voice fell silent.
She still recognized it, just like that thunderstorm night several years ago, when she was the only one who could hear him calling for help.
"Aren't you afraid of me?"
"Why should I be afraid?"
“They are all afraid.”
“They are not me.”
"… "
Qin Lou slowly tightened his fingers and clasped the girl's hand. He lowered his eyes and watched silently in the darkness.
He was holding back tears.
"Yes, they are not you."
In my world,
No one is you.