He said quite easily and happily: "I have discovered since I was a child that if I use Bai Sheng, I can easily escape all kinds of punishment. Forgive him, sympathize with him."
"Even my parents, it's a relief for everyone to blame all the faults on another troublesome 'personality', right, so to speak, how did we raise such a son , that's not our son at all, but this cute and cute victim. Hehe, but... finally turning their favorite son into a homosexual is a very refreshing thing."
"Besides..." Bai Cheng sneered and said, "Is Lu Baizhou really clueless? He's been trying to warn you non-stop, and you haven't listened to him."
These words penetrated into Ling Chennan's ears mercilessly, and he could no longer utter a single word.
Bai Sheng didn't care, and continued, "Since that's the case, let me tell you one more thing out of mercy. Don't you wonder why I was willing to be referred to Lu Baizhou since I don't really have a split personality?"
Ling Chennan raised his eyes to look at him, and continued to say to the convenience: "First, of course, because I am very confident in dressing up as Bai Sheng, and second, because...that guy is always hostile to me. When I saw me, I became vigilant, always trying to keep me away from you, and he looked like he had known you the longest and knew you best, I hated it when I saw it! So when you asked me for a referral Although I resisted it at first, but after thinking about it carefully, I agreed."
Ling Chennan thought that before Bai Sheng would occasionally share with him some things about diagnosis and treatment—such as being insecure with Lu Baizhou, Lu Baizhou treated him harshly, etc., until the part when Lu Baizhou used Shen Yinchuan’s commutation of sentence to test him, which caused him to go crazy and almost self-harm For a long time, Ling Chennan inevitably blamed the other party in his heart, and subconsciously alienated and lost contact with the other party.
It turned out that this alienation was also the result of careful arrangements! Ling Chennan was in a daze, why, was it just because they were close, because he was afraid that the two of them would communicate too much and see the clues and spoil his plan!
"It looks innocent and fragile, but in fact he is very good at manipulating people's hearts, and he will follow his thoughts unconsciously."
Shen Yinchuan's words suddenly rang in his ears.
He fell into the sofa dejectedly, and Bai Sheng came over and sat beside him, took his hand and said, "Your hands are so cold."
Ling Chennan didn't speak, but firmly pulled his fingers away one by one, don't look away from him.
Bai Cheng crossed his arms, raised his chin and looked down at him, as if he disliked his distraught appearance: "Looking at how you've been hit so hard, you can ask anything you want now, I'll They will answer truthfully."
Ling Chennan shook his head.
Bai Sheng said impatiently: "Hurry up, don't you really want to know? There may not be a time when I am so kind in the future."
After being silent for a while, Ling Chennan finally found his voice and said in a low voice, "Okay, let's start from the very beginning."
Ling Chennan: "You approached me just to solve Shen Yinchuan, right?"
Bai Sheng nodded frankly: "It was indeed like this at the beginning. In fact, you were not the only one who was investigated at the time, and the subsequent development did not follow the process I envisioned, but... Overall, it was safe and sound. .”
Ling Chennan was very angry at his calm and bland remarks, and he didn't know where to ask: "So even if it wasn't me, it would be someone else, is that what you mean?"
Bai Sheng said: "In theory, this is the case. At first, I wanted to choose a female doctor with strong empathy, but don't get me wrong, I didn't come here with the mentality of wanting to fall in love with a psychiatrist. It’s just that the doctor is too gentle, even I can’t help being seduced.”
Ling Chennan pushed away his leaning shoulder, pressed his temple and asked with a headache: "So what do you mean in the first few weeks? Pretend that you are a perpetrator instead of an ordinary victim, just to get my attention? Then After that... why did you deliberately let me see the evidence that you investigated me?" His mind was full of questions: "And toffee, why did he show up?"
Bai Sheng wasn't annoyed when he was pushed away, he leaned on the sofa cushion and raised his legs, chuckled and said, "Who told you to be so defensive, every time I move forward a little bit, you will quickly retreat behind the line, I refused to do anything that crossed the line, so I thought at the time, if I just get along with you like this, once a week, when will I be able to advance the relationship to the next step, you won’t believe me , I will never be able to effectively influence you if I don’t have a strong sense of counter-transference and responsibility for me, and at that time Shen Yinchuan wanted to apply me to his contact list outside the prison through the prison, which made me very anxious, so I decided to try A powerful medicine—it must be private enough, intense enough, and paranoid enough to touch your true emotions, and this is the conclusion I came to after patiently paying attention to the doctor for so long.”
"As for Toffee, isn't that a step in the plan? Who told you to run away at that time? As Bai Sheng alone, I couldn't keep you, so I had to create such a character temporarily. This is the first time When it appeared, it was so sudden that I didn't dare to speak in order not to reveal my secrets."
Ling Chennan recalled it for a while, indeed, the two times that Toffee appeared so far was the time when he had the intention to shrink back—just after he made up his mind to keep a distance from the other party, Toffee would appear and make him feel soft-hearted. And after that, whether it was in front of himself or in front of Lu Baizhou, Toffee never appeared again.
"But it's really good to be a toffee, you can act like a baby with the doctor as you like," Bai Sheng sighed, "It's a pity that just to be cautious, I don't want to show my feet, so I resisted using this identity again."
Many details are connected in this way. Ling Chennan's hope that the other party is just a hummingbird or some kind of personality pretending to play tricks on him is getting slimmer and slimmer. He sighed and said to himself dejectedly: "I really stepped into this trap step by step. , I actually, did I really harm Shen Yinchuan..."
Bai Cheng suddenly became angry. He looked fierce like a hummingbird, and said loudly in a sharp tone: "That scum deserves what he deserves! Do you still want to say such things to those who have been in contact with him yourself! Other things are fine, he Is it not true what has been done to me? I have been tortured by him for so long, imprisoned by him, nearly killed, and then living with drug dependence and side effects. Isn't the pain and suffering I have gone through Is it true!"
Ling Chennan also became angry, and said: "Okay, even if Shen Yinchuan deserved what he deserved, he has already received a punishment that is more than worse, and your goal has been achieved, should you play enough of me? Then I will go home today Why are you still here when you are here, shouldn't you go far away for me!"
"Tricking you?" Bai Sheng raised his eyebrows, and repeated hysterically: "Tricking you? Do you think I'm with you just because of that scum? Do you think I will do this no matter who it is?"
Ling Chennan: "Then what are you..."
Bai Sheng interrupted him loudly: "Because I like you!"
Ling Chennan opened his mouth, unable to speak.
Then the other party's voice dropped again: "The words I told you... those words are all from my heart..."
Ling Chennan's already drowned heart started beating again, and he said in confusion: "What..."
Then he remembered Bai Sheng's "those words":
"So when I was able to talk to you, I was very happy... although... it was not in my own capacity at first."
"I want to tell you a lot of things, but I am afraid that you will dislike me if you know too much. I don't know what to do. I dare not face you with my identity. I am afraid that if you don't like me, if you hate me ,what can we do about it."
"But, it's still not good, no one else can do it, only you."
That's what he seemed to say at the time.
"Please, please help me, as long as you like me a little bit."
The confession that sounded sweet and touching at the time has now turned into blatant ridicule and irony.
Once the floodgates of memory were opened, he recalled the consultation a few months ago - they were sitting in his office, he asked Bai Sheng about the existence of another personality, the other party hesitated for a moment - not hesitating how to express it, Instead, they are taking the opportunity to organize their rhetoric. He said at the time—that man's name was Hummingbird, he liked sunflowers, and he always drank black tea in the middle of the night, which made him unable to sleep.
is not that right.
Hummingbird is the pattern on the teacup in my office.
Sunflowers are the paintings on the walls of my office.
The toffee was the wedding candy that was placed on his table at the wedding of a colleague at that time.
The Bai Sheng in the story is obviously lactose intolerant and drinks soy milk latte, but the fact is that every time he pours water at home, the other party will make black tea.
All the details are in front of my eyes, and all the clues are around me.
It's not that I can't see it, but that I don't want to see it.
Seeing that he kept his head down and said nothing, Bai Sheng crawled over from the other side of the sofa and kissed his forehead, and said softly, "Doctor, do you hate me? Didn't you say that you would accept me no matter what I look like?" Is it mine."
Ling Chennan shook his hand abruptly and stood up - he swung his arm too violently, and hit Bai Sheng's chin with a "slap".