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Bai Sheng's Perspective · Extra Story 1
[9:00 am]
He's been agitated lately, and as the hour draws on, his agitation reaches a crescendo.
It happened this morning.
It's not that he didn't realize his growing agitation—especially when he saw his cohabiting lover who was walking leisurely at home and didn't bother to help his glasses collapsed to the tip of his nose—he was even more angry.
The other party's indifference further, completely and completely highlights his own stupid anxiety.
"Are you really sure?" He simply walked around in front of the other person and blocked his way to pick up his coffee. Bai Sheng asked for the countless times: "Don't you misheard or misunderstood..."
The other party raised his eyebrows, glanced lightly at him from above the glasses, then put on a smile of unknown meaning and took two steps forward, reaching a distance where he was almost close to kissing him, stretched his hand around his waist—pressed open Turn off the coffee machine behind you.
He felt a vein pop up on his forehead.
Only then did Ling Chennan lazily say: "It's been a few months since I asked this question? The tickets are all booked and you're sure you're not sure? As the saying goes, ugly daughter-in-law..."
Oh, by the way, this is the source of anxiety, because the doctor asked me to accompany him home to see my parents.
"How dare you say it!" He interrupted the other party loudly: "How dare you finish this sentence!"
The other party immediately made a movement of pulling the zipper with his mouth, and then pushed the glasses with the knuckles of his index finger—this movement is always inexplicably sensational when performed by doctors, so he was distracted for half a second.
After thinking about it, he asked again: "What did your mother say at the time, can your father accept you bringing a man home? It's one thing to say it, but it's another thing to actually see it. Her tone at the time was How about it… "
The other party did not answer immediately, put the cup aside, took out the phone from his pocket, slid it open and clicked a few times, and then said into the microphone: "My mother said, if you have a stable relationship, take it home and have a look, everyone Have a meal together, you won't lose a piece of meat, if you don't come back, your father and I will come to you."
After the other party finished speaking, he let go of his finger. Half a second later, his mobile phone rang. He took it out and saw a voice message.
Ling Chennan explained: "In the future, when you want to hear what my mother has to say, you can directly play this voice."
Seeing him with a dark face, the lover who seems to be good but actually has a bad heart touches the screen with his thumb, and the voice recorded just now rang between the two: "My mother said that there is a stable relationship..."
"Enough!" After slapping his screen to black, Bai Sheng left in a rage.
[10:00 am]
It's so annoying, what kind of psychiatrist doesn't take other people's worries seriously at all, the more he thinks about it, the more angry he gets, when he asked him "what kind of person does your parents like", he actually said, "Just be yourself. "No constructive comments at all. If you ask again later, the other party either interrupts or pretends not to hear, which is really disgusting.
It must be very interesting to see myself being played around, and I am taking revenge on myself!
He found it difficult to understand, how could parents accept the fact that their only son is gay so smoothly? It must be that the doctor's family environment was too peaceful and simple in the past, and he didn't know the horror of bad words. It may also be that he knew the inside story but intentionally beautified the situation to comfort him. Maybe, his father would break his leg and lock him up at home as soon as he got off the plane, and then marry a woman on a blind date under coercion. Will he still look calm.
Let's see if he dares to make fun of himself with "you homophobic closet".
The doctor who had been turned into a sperm donation bank had no idea of his intense mental activity, poured a lot of milk and milk foam into the coffee, looked up and completely misunderstood his hideous expression, and said, "It's not I want to give you a drink, so don't put on such a face."
It's not because I'm afraid of milk! Just say he doesn't understand the situation! Bai Sheng broke the tip of the drawing pencil.
[11:00 am]
The more I think about going home to meet my parents, the more terrifying it becomes.
After scratching his heart and lungs for a while, the manuscript paper in front of him was painted with messy polygons. He finally raised his head and cleared his throat twice at the person sitting across the room looking at the computer, and said, "Let's have a rational discussion..."
Unexpectedly, after only hearing these few words, the other party suddenly burst out laughing. He lowered his face in displeasure: "What are you laughing at?"
The other party immediately pursed his lips and said, "No, you say it, be rational and discuss."
Seeing how annoying his playful smile was, Bai Sheng said, "I won't say anything about you."
"Ouch," Ling Chennan half-closed the lid of the notebook, coaxing a lazy smile, "Don't be angry, just tell me."
He gritted his teeth and asked, "What is your parents' attitude towards you coming out? Are they overwhelmed by the struggle, or let it go, or... the kind of people who still hope that you can go back one day?" Yes? Have you ever arranged a blind date for you? There must have been, it is impossible not to try... "
Ling Chennan raised his eyebrows, and asked back: "Can't we communicate peacefully with knowledge and reason and then reach a consensus?"
He shook his head decisively in denial: "Impossible."
After all... When "Bai Sheng" came out, even though he had made complete psychological preparations, or had no hope at all, he was still shocked by his family's ruthless and sharp attitude. In the past, he would concentrate all the pleasing appearances he had the energy to disguise on the personality of "Bai Sheng", and hide under the split skin to release excess emotional pressure recklessly, but that time, only this matter, he I want to keep Bai Sheng's identity.
Maybe it's okay to use that submissive and sensible personality to bear a little flaw, maybe this time it will be different.
And the result of the attempt is intuitive and brutal.
The doctor said that because of this spontaneous and family-imposed moral guilt, he had a subconscious aversion to same-sex relationships and made it harder for him to be attracted to healthy relationships. He thought maybe the doctor was right.
In short, meeting his parents made him feel strongly uneasy.
With a quick glance at the doctor who was watching the computer not far away, he tried to ask in an understatement tone: "Otherwise... let's forget it this time, you can go back by yourself first, and I will be with you next time... the air ticket, Even if you don't want to refund, you can change the opening date, next time... "
However, the other party's sharp gaze suddenly raised his head and cast him, cutting off his words.
Why are you staring at me so fiercely... He was a little dazed, but before he could open his mouth, the other party threw a dry word: "No."
"What..." Bai Sheng murmured back.
Ling Chennan repeated firmly again: "I say no!"
He also straightened his back and asked in a bad tone, "Why?"
Ling Chennan raised his voice: "Why? Didn't we discuss this matter? You promised a long time ago, and I've confirmed it with you repeatedly, and now you're going back on your word? Not to mention the air ticket, we've already made an appointment with my family , why did you suddenly throw out a sentence of not going, there must be a limit to self-willedness."
He didn't expect that he would face such accusations head-on for his casual words, and he became unhappy: "Is it necessary? I'm just talking casually. If it doesn't work, forget it. Why are you so loud."
"Tell me casually?" Ling Chennan frowned: "Still sounding out my tone? Do you dare to say that if my tone is a little looser, you won't go downhill and persuade me to go by myself? You can also let things go that you have agreed with the elders. It's too rude to be temperamental."
Enraged by the other party's merciless tone, he stood up abruptly and retorted: "That's right, I'm so rude, so I don't want to go! How could you be willing to take someone like me back to see my parents? Say it, you should have wanted to say it a long time ago, just say it!"
The other party showed an inexplicable expression and asked, "What did you say?"
"Tell me to go as 'him'!" He finally yelled out what he had been holding in his heart for weeks: "No matter how you meet your parents, it's safer to ask him to go!"
Ling Chennan asked incredulously: "What? What nonsense are you talking about!"
No, it shouldn't be like this, don't run wild, don't speak unscrupulously, the doctor won't like it, you should speak well.
But more words seemed to pop out of my mouth spontaneously: "Isn't it? Do you dare to say that you don't miss him more? I'm rude? I've been like this from the beginning to the end, the polite and obedient one has never It’s not me, did you know on the first day! Or do you finally regret it? Admit that you regret it! It’s too late to regret it!”
No... that's not the case, I didn't mean to say such things!
I love doctors and I am happy every day because doctors don't give up being with me!
"That's right, give up, you only deserve to be with me! It's impossible to go back!" But he still said so.
Knowing what the other party's heart knot is, but he still deliberately pressed towards this pressure point: "If you are so perfect, how can you have the handle to fall into my hands!"
It's clearly not like this... He clearly knows that the other party is not with him because of this.
Sure enough, the more familiar people are, the more they know what kind of sharp weapon can cause more harm. A soul stabbed by words is like paper stained with ink. Not only will it become mottled and dark, but it will never return to smoothness.
Ling Chennan also stood up with a livid face, but he didn't yell at him. He didn't say a word, turned around and left and went upstairs.
The aftermath of anger lasted less than a minute,