"You have always been the one I like." Jiang Zhixia hugged the person in her arms tightly, "Can you give me another chance?"
Xia Zhi hung his head in silence, and after a long while, he reminded him, "I remember you said that you would tell me on the show why you chose to leave."
All the warmth disappeared in an instant.
Jiang Zhixia's face stiffened slightly.
Xia Zhi chuckled and waved her arms slightly, trying to break free from his embrace: "Don't want to talk about it again?"
"No, I'll tell you if you want to know," Jiang Zhixia not only did not let go, but hugged him even tighter, resting his forehead against his shoulder and neck.
He closed his eyes, as if he had finally made up his mind, and spoke with some difficulty: "Something happened at home at that time, and we needed money urgently."
Xia Zhi stopped struggling.
Although he already had some premonition about the reason why Jiang Zhixia left, he was still stunned for a moment when he heard the answer from his own mouth.
Unlike the other four teammates who were born and raised in big cities and have wealthy families, Jiang Zhixia's family is very ordinary.
Both of my parents were from the countryside, but they were lucky enough to be among the first to leave the village. My father had a craft and worked as a skilled worker in a manufacturing factory in the county town; my mother was also a workshop worker, but she was injured when she gave birth to Jiang Zhixia and was not suitable for hard work, so she simply quit her job and became a housewife.
The salary of her father was enough to support the family in a small county, so the life of the family of three was simple but happy. However, something unexpected happened the year after Victoria made her debut.
First, the mother was diagnosed with cancer. Although there was still room for treatment because of timely examination, the treatment required a large amount of money. In order to treat the mother, they soon spent all the family savings. Then it was the father. Because he was worried about the mother's condition, he was distracted while operating the machine and his right arm was accidentally caught in the machine. Because of the severity of the injury, he had to have amputation.
As a result, my father lost his ability to work and was forced to become unemployed. To make matters worse, the unscrupulous company falsely accused my father of entering the workshop without permission to operate the machine during off-duty hours, which led to the accident, and refused to compensate him for the work injury.
To this day, that is still the darkest time in Jiang Zhixia's life. A family is shaky and on the verge of collapse. His mother's illness, his father's injury, and the heavy financial pressure are like three huge rocks pressing on him, making him breathless.
He himself was in a mess at the time, and Victoria was facing the crisis of disbanding due to poor development. His future became confusing and he didn't know where the way out was.
Gu Ying, the agency that Jiang Zhixia later signed with, approached him at this time.
Gu Ying somehow learned about his situation, and based on his situation at the time, offered a series of attractive contract conditions - paying his penalty for breach of contract; tailor-making a script for him and using all the company's resources to make him famous as quickly as possible; and even being willing to pay him his salary in advance.
However, what finally made him nod was Gu Ying's help to his family - Gu Ying provided them with legal aid and helped his father get compensation. Later, he helped contact the hospital in City A so that his mother could receive better treatment.
At that time, Jiang Zhixia was just an inconspicuous little artist, and no one was sure whether he would become famous in the end. Gu Ying's move could be said to be basically charity. But at that time, what Jiang Zhixia lacked most was a touch of kindness, so he grabbed it without hesitation, even at the cost of betraying his teammates and his lover.
Many years have passed, but when Jiang Zhixia talks about this past event, he can still deeply feel the powerlessness and suffocation he felt at that time.
As a bystander, Xia Zhi couldn't calm down for a long time after listening to it.
He suddenly remembered that in the month before Victoria disbanded, Jiang Zhixia's mood became more and more depressed. He frowned all day long and looked worried.
But at that time, the crisis of Victoria's disbanding was lingering on everyone's mind, and everyone was in a low mood, so Xia Zhi naturally thought that he was worried about the future of the group.
During that time, the company suspended all of Victoria's activities, and they stayed in the dormitory all day long. Jiang Zhixia made seven or eight phone calls almost every day, and he made them secretly without letting them know. I still remember that at that time, Sang Luo and the others suspected that he was secretly in a relationship and didn't dare to let them know. He ran to ask, but Jiang Zhixia told him that a friend in his hometown had an accident at home, and he was a little worried.
He had always blamed Jiang Zhixia for their breakup, thinking that he had betrayed him. But at this moment, he suddenly couldn't tell whether it was his betrayal and concealment of him, or his neglect and indifference to him, that led to their breakup.
"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have told you nothing, and I shouldn't have explained everything." Jiang Zhixia's tone became anxious, "At that time, I got stuck in a dead end. I didn't want to make you worry, but I also didn't want you to... look down on me."
Xia Zhi just felt a surge of anger in his heart - what do you mean I don't want you to look down on me!
He shook off Jiang Zhixia's hand, turned around angrily, and reached out to push him hard.
Jiang Zhixia was pushed back and staggered a few steps before stopping.
Xia Zhi's eyes were slightly red, and he clenched his fists tightly to barely resist the urge to hit him: "Is that how you see me? In your mind, am I a person who laughs at other people's suffering?!"
"No! I know you won't do that." Jiang Zhixia lowered her head slowly after speaking for a long time, and suddenly laughed at herself, "You may not know that although I love you very much, when I was with you, I was actually always uneasy, and I didn't even think we could really make it to the end."
"What… "
Jiang Zhixia took a deep breath and said softly, "I was born in the countryside. My parents are not well educated and are just ordinary workers. You were born in a big city. Your parents are both well educated. Your family is well off and your family atmosphere is good. Although I don't want to admit it, the gap between us is indeed huge."
"Of course I won't doubt you," Jiang Zhixia raised her head and asked him calmly, "But will your family agree that we are together?"
Xia Zhi was stunned: "Why do you think so?"
"…," Jiang Zhixia asked him, "Do you remember that a week before the group disbanded, your parents came to City A to visit you, and you took me to the hotel to meet them."
Of course Xia Zhi remembered.
At that time, his parents were on a business trip to City A, and they wanted to visit their son. At that time, Xia Zhi and Jiang Zhixia were still in love, and the night before he went to meet his parents, he struggled all night whether to take Jiang Zhixia with him.
In the end, he decided to take him along. Although Jiang Zhixia took the initiative to attend the banquet as a good friend in order not to embarrass him, for him, this was a formal meeting with his family.
In order to leave a good impression on his parents, Xia Zhi brought out almost all of Jiang Zhixia's advantages, telling them over and over again how good Jiang Zhixia was and how much she took care of him. However, because he was too obvious, his astute parents saw through him at a glance. After dinner, Xia Zhi sent his parents back to the hotel, and his mother asked him directly if he liked her.
Because his parents wanted him to further his studies at that time, they did not approve of him having a relationship to distract himself during his undergraduate studies. Xia Zhi then admitted that he had a one-sided crush on Jiang Zhixia.
His parents didn't say anything, but just told him to focus on his studies. However, they didn't forbid them from having a deeper relationship in the future, which was a disguised way of accepting Jiang Zhixia.
So in Xia Zhi's heart, that meeting was of great significance.
However, what happened that night was completely opposite to what Jiang Zhixia thought.
Because Xia Zhi had said long before that his parents were both university professors, even though Jiang Zhixia went to dinner with the two elders as a friend that day, he was still very nervous, and this nervous feeling continued until the end of the dinner.
Because Xia Zhi mentioned him frequently, the topic of conversation naturally turned to him. Xia Zhi's parents asked about his situation, including his family. Although he was so nervous that his palms were sweating, he still answered truthfully.
When Xia Zhi's parents learned that he came from a small county town in the south and that his parents were ordinary people, they did not show any contempt or disdain for him. It was only then that Jiang Zhixia finally breathed a sigh of relief.
However, Xia Zhi's mother suddenly changed the subject and asked Xia Zhi whether she wanted to go abroad for vacation. From then on, the topic completely shifted from Jiang Zhixia to Xia Zhi.
Xia Zhi told him that in the past, their family would travel abroad every summer vacation. So, for a long time, Jiang Zhixia sat there, listening to the three of them talking about their past vacations, listening to them talk about vacations at the beach in Southeast Asia, skiing in the snow-capped mountains of the Alps, and attending elegant concerts.
"Wait a minute," Xia Zhi couldn't help interrupting him when he heard this, and asked in disbelief, "You don't think my parents deliberately talked about this in front of you? Just to make you give up?"
Jiang Zhixia did not deny it, but asked him back: "If it were you, and your lover's parents asked you about your ordinary family one second, and the next second they talked about the interesting things their family experienced when traveling abroad, what would you think of the elders' intentions?"
"I..." Xia Zhi was speechless.
If it were the old Jiang Zhixia, he might not have speculated about his lover's parents with the most malicious thoughts. But at that time, his family had just experienced a dramatic change, and the tight financial situation crushed all his high spirits. But at this time, Xia Zhi's parents came.
Xia Zhi tried to refute him, but when he put himself in the shoes of Jiang Zhixia at that time, he found that he was completely powerless to refute.
"I'm sorry, this was our negligence. We didn't consider your feelings." Xia Zhi tried to explain, "But my parents really didn't mean that. On the way back to the hotel, they kept praising you, saying that you are smart and excellent... So later I confessed to them that you are actually the person I like, and they didn't forbid us to continue to associate. They really like you, really..."
The harder he tried to explain, the more he realized how pale and powerless these explanations were. Finally, he covered his face in frustration and murmured, "I should have told them earlier that I liked you very much. If I had told you this earlier, maybe we wouldn't have..."
Maybe we won't break up...
If it weren't for this misunderstanding, Jiang Zhixia might not have preferred to be misunderstood and blamed by him rather than tell him the truth about her leaving.
"Now that I've told you everything that happened back then," Jiang Zhixia asked very carefully, "Can you forgive me?"
Xia Zhi smiled bitterly in his heart. He had no right to blame him, let alone forgive him.
He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, suppressing the bitter tears in the corners of his eyes, and said calmly: "Let's leave it at that. No one should mention it again in the future, and you don't have to feel guilty towards me anymore."
Jiang Zhixia let out a long sigh and a smile appeared on his face, but the smile didn't stay on his face for a few seconds before it was put away again.
"As for other things, I don't want to think about them for now." Xia Zhi avoided his eyes, and said in a slightly hoarse voice, "We are fine the way we are now."
(End of this chapter)