Perhaps when she was reading that diary, Li Lan had already fallen in love with Gu Xuewu, the Gu Xuewu who had not appeared in front of her, only existed in illusion.
Later, she approached again and again, and tried again and again. She wanted to see if she could defeat Zhou Ying who was in Gu Xuewu's heart. But she lost.
Just relying on Gu Xuewu not being confused by her appearance, and simply relying on his feelings to determine that she is not Zhou Ying, she knew she had lost.
Gu Xuewu's love for Zhou Ying was so deep that she couldn't shake it. Even if she looks the same as Zhou Ying, Gu Xuewu won't take another look at her, so she's already planning to give up, because she has already looked at Gu Xuewu more than once for Zhou Ying.
And most importantly, Gu Xuewu also has Zhou Ying in his heart. In this way, Zhou Ying is happy.
But when she knew that Gu Xuewu was with Qiao Xinwan, she suddenly felt uncomfortable.
If Gu Xuewu could be happy with Qiao Xinwan without any consideration. So what is Zhou Ying's suffering? What is Zhou Ying's injury? Learn from the table.
When she saw Gu Xuewu buying flowers for another woman, especially Qiao Xinwan, on Zhou Ying's birthday, she finally couldn't help it. She wanted to tell Gu Xuewu about Zhou Ying.
She wanted Gu Xuewu to know what Zhou Ying had done for him. She didn't believe that after Gu Xuewu knew all this, he would still be with Qiao Xinwan.
"Gu Xuewu." Li Lan bit her lips desperately, her voice filled with hatred: "In the future, I will never appear in front of you again. I will give you all of Zhou Ying's things. What kind of decision are you going to make? , what kind of life you want to live has nothing to do with me from today on.”
Looking deeply at Zhou Ying on the tombstone, Li Lan bowed her body: "Sister, I'm leaving. I'm sorry, please forgive my waywardness for the last time."
Yes, she is willful, she fell in love with Gu Xuewu, from the illusory person who appeared in the diary to Gu Xuewu who really appeared in front of her later.
She wanted to get closer, wanted to get closer, and wanted to see if she could have such a chance. But she didn't. Gu Xuewu would not love her. Because she is not Zhou Ying.
It is impossible for her to love someone silently without asking for anything in return. And Gu Xuewu would never be able to respond to her.
She was wrong. And today, she wasn't sure if she had done something wrong again. It's just that at this time, it doesn't matter whether it is right or wrong.
The secret she had been keeping was revealed, and the burden she had been carrying was let go, and Li Lan felt relieved. Looking at Gu Xuewu, I really have no interaction with this man in the future.
Turn around and leave calmly.
Gu Xuewu sat there, looking at the extra iron box in his hand. There was no action for a long time. Zhou Ying is dead, cancer
How could she have cancer at such a young age? Gu Xuewu couldn't believe it. Looking at the box in his hand, he felt that it weighed a thousand catties.
The sun rose higher and shone on people, very warm.
Gu Xuewu gently opened the iron box, which contained a mobile phone chain, a withered leaf, and a brooch with a smiling face. There is also a diary.
When he saw a leaf, he was completely stunned, stretched out his hand blankly, and picked up the leaf. The leaves have long since dried up, with yellow veins and clear texture.
The first date of the two people flashed through their minds. On a mountain in that small county town, they saw a bodhi tree.
He didn't care about those plants. But Zhou Ying was different. She liked the bodhi tree and the heart-shaped leaves. She stretched out her hand and picked one off, looking at Gu Xuewu.
"This, I want to keep as a souvenir."
"It's just a leaf, what's there to commemorate?"
"This is not an ordinary leaf." Zhou Ying tilted her head slightly and looked at Gu Xuewu: "This commemorates our first date. Of course we have to keep it."
She took the leaves back like a baby. He thought she was just joking, but he didn't think it was true.
And that smiley face brooch. Once, when he went out on a date with Zhou Ying, he drove to a neighboring county, where no one knew them. On the streets of the county seat, there was a person who wrote letters asking for help and laid them on the side of the road. Tell me how difficult it is at home, how you need help, and how that person came up with this solution.
Set up a stall. Then sell some accessories. He mostly maintains an attitude of thinking that these people who ask for help are deceitful, and leave as soon as he sees them. But Zhou Ying was different. .
She wanted to help that person, but seeing that he was going to drag her away, she insisted on pulling back his steps, and asked him to give her something with a coquettish smile.
She picked out the things on the stall for a long time, and finally chose this brooch. The one hundred yuan brooch was very cheap in his opinion, but she was as happy as if she had obtained a world.
"I look at a smiling face every day, and I smile every day. When you see me happy, will you be happy too?"
The memories that have been forgotten in my heart, because seeing familiar things, Gu Xuewu's eyes are a little hot. Putting down the things in his hands, he finally reached out and picked up the diary.
The diary had already turned yellow, and when I opened the cover, it was Zhou Ying's beautiful handwriting.
Her words are as serious and meticulous as her person. In the first few pages, she participated in the work and some views on teaching work. Seeing the beginning of the middle, the content is different.
There is him on it. From the first time, he presented her with an award.
She wrote on it: My heart was beating so hard, I never knew that the county magistrate could be so young and handsome. Is it love at first sight? However, he is a county magistrate.
The following content, bit by bit, records how they got together, how they fell in love, and how they dated. When she was with her, Zhou Ying was undoubtedly happy.
Gu Xuewu also felt those happiness. Because he admitted that he was also very relaxed and happy during the more than a year with Zhou Ying. There is a sense of well-being.
Her feelings are all written in that diary. Gu Xuewu watched very slowly, those fragments were also his memories. Just the angle is different.
He naturally knew that Zhou Ying loved her. But he didn't know that she loved him so much...
…………………………………
Qiao Xinwan took Bei'er outside to bask in the sun for a long time, until Bei'er's face was flushed red, she pushed Bei'er into the door.
Aunt Zhou took Belle to drink porridge. Belle is getting bigger and bigger, and now she can drink porridge and eat some solid food.
After eating, I slept again in the afternoon. When he woke up, Gu Xuewu unexpectedly came.
She looked at the time, and she should still be at work now: "Why is it so early today? Is there anything at work?"
Gu Xuewu sat on the edge of the bed and looked at her with a very gloomy expression. Qiao Xinwan was startled by his expression, and didn't know what to say for a moment. Today's Gu Xuewu is really not quite right. very different.
"Xuewu? You, what's wrong with you?"
Gu Xuewu looked at Qiao Xinwan, she just woke up, wearing silk pajamas, the front of the pajamas slipped a little, a bit messy. The long hair was casually draped behind her head, full of temptation and temptation.
She propped herself up with one hand, and reached out to herself with the other. That look, like a rose that has just bloomed, is infinitely charming.
Qiao Xinwan is beautiful, he has always admitted this. But he should know that no matter how beautiful a rose is, it has thorns.
Feeling her hand touching his cheek, he stretched out his hand to hold her hand, seeing the shyness flashing across Qiao Xinwan's face, he closed his eyes, and when he opened them again, there was no emotion inside.
"Why didn't you tell me that Zhou Ying was sick?"
Qiao Xinwan was stunned for a moment, and suddenly heard the name Zhou Ying, which made her unable to react for a while: "Gu Xuewu, you..."
"Tell me, why never tell me?" Gu Xuewu's heart really hurt. For Zhou Ying. Also, because of Qiao Xinwan.
Zhou Ying, she is sick, uterine cancer. Suffering so much pain, and then died alone in the hospital without anyone by my side.
Zhou Ying, Zhou Ying. That name became a thorn in Gu Xuewu's heart. His heart was full of guilt, remorse, and hatred.
He hates himself, why can he be so subjective
Why did he think that Zhou Ying would only stay where there were students? Why did he only ask people to find schools in those mountain villages, why did he assume that Zhou Ying must have left Beidu
Why did he think that Zhou Ying's departure was because of happiness, maybe she was with other men
What now? Zhou Ying is dead.
He died like that, with regret, longing, and unwillingness for him. Reluctant. He left this world so bleakly. How can this embarrass him
Qiao Xinwan was stunned by his heartache and eagerness. It was not the first time he saw this kind of emotion on Gu Xuewu's face. Time seems to go back many years ago.
When he drank with his head sullen and ignored people at all. The warmth from his hand showed that he was still holding her hand.
Qiao Xinwan couldn't answer Gu Xuewu's question. At that time, she really hoped that Zhou Ying would go as far as possible. She thought there was no hope, but she didn't expect Zhou Ying to be sick. This was a chance God gave her.
She knew very well in her heart that if she told Gu Xuewu that Zhou Ying was sick, he might not care about that at all, and would die with Zhou Ying. And she loves Gu Xuewu so much, how could she give Gu Xuewu this chance
Therefore, she chose to remain silent and not to speak. She did those things, so now she has nothing to say.
Gu Xuewu looked at Qiao Xinwan's face and tightened his hands. He wanted an answer: "Tell me, Qiao Xinwan, in your heart, do other people's pain and sadness have nothing to do with you? You can Is your purpose, to hurt others, disregarding their pain and life or death? Is that right?"
The last two words were almost shouted. Such an excited appearance made Qiao Xinwan speechless. She was indeed like that before, and she did not deny it.
The life and death of others has nothing to do with her. She loves Gu Xuewu and wants to be with Gu Xuewu, so she naturally hopes that other women will not have the chance. So far, she doesn't think she was wrong. There is nothing wrong with that.
Silence, the atmosphere in the air was oppressive and heavy, Gu Xuewu didn't want to believe that Qiao Xinwan would do such a thing. Deep down in his heart, when he knew that Zhou Ying was dead and the past, he came to Qiao Xinwan immediately. He wondered, were those things true
Just now, he saw the diary...
*Month Day. clear.
The weather was fine, but I was in a bad mood. I didn't expect that God made such a joke with me. I'm sick, uterine cancer.
To cure the disease, the uterus must be removed. I can never be a mother.
I can't digest this news at all. I'm just overwhelmed. I don't know what to do. I just stood there stupidly. I couldn't hear anything said by the people around me.
Back at the hotel in a daze, I want to consult with Xuewu, what should I do
To treat, or to give up
If Xue Wu knew about it, what would he think
But I didn't wait until Xuewu, another girl appeared, I don't know how she knew about the hotel where I was staying, she stood in front of me with a haughty expression, and stared at me with disdain.
Said that I am not worthy of being the daughter-in-law of the Gu family, that I am not worthy of Gu Xuewu.
I wanted to refute and argue, but I couldn't say a word. I could only stare blankly at that woman, talking bit by bit about the inappropriateness between me and Gu Xuewu. Then let me leave Gu Xuewu.
I admit that I was confused, panicked, and lost all of a sudden. I have absolutely no idea what to do with myself. That medical record defeated all my pride.
By the time I realized it, I had already left the hotel. I have an extra check in my hand.
It was given by that girl. Five million, she is really generous. But is my love only worth five million
No. I love Gu Xuewu. My love for Gu Xuewu is priceless.
Holding that check, I wanted to tear it up, but I couldn't. I am afraid of death. I don't want to die, I want to live. I want to spend my whole life with Gu Xuewu. Even on ordinary days.
I believe that I will not die, the doctor may have made a wrong diagnosis. There must be other ways to save me.
I want to find another hospital, and I want to get cured.
Xuewu, you wait for me.
*Month Day.
The date of the operation has been fixed, the doctor is very confident, I believe that I will be fine. Xuewu, can you wait for me
I'm cured and I'm here.
Going through that chemotherapy, and the radiation, was really painful. But every time it is very painful, I think of you by my side.
I believe that I will get through it, Xuewu, you wait for me. I will come.
*Month Day.
God. The operation failed. Even removing the uterus did not stop the cancer from spreading in my body. I thought I could stand in front of Gu Xuewu after the operation was successful.
But the operation failed. I faced the end of my life and a broken body.
What should I do? learn martial arts. How good would it be if you were by my side? You can tell me, what should I do
I don't want to die, I want to be with you, and we will stay together until we grow old.
Xuewu, will you accompany me? You don't mind, do you? You will face this with me, right
It is really painful for a person to face illness. I can't hold on anymore. Learn martial arts, will you come with me
I want to come back to you, Xuewu, I believe in you. I was wrong, I shouldn't leave you impulsively. You wait for me, I will come back to find you.
*Month Day.
a bolt from the blue.
How is this going? I looked at the couple who were getting married in the distance, completely speechless. Xuewu, you are actually married? how can you
I mustered up the courage to come to you, I thought you would accept, would be happy to see me, and would happily spend the last time of my life with me.
But you are married. You are very handsome in a groom's gown, but the bride is not me.
Why
Gu Xuewu, if your love for me is true, how could you marry another woman in such a short time
Why
Gu Xuewu, if you really love me, how could you forget me so quickly.
Could it be that you never loved me
My heart hurts beyond words...
Learn martial arts, learn martial arts...
……………
That's the way it is. Knowing that she was sick, Zhou Ying was too shocked to react at all. Meeting Qiao Xinwan again, Qiao Xinwan's aggressive attitude made her even more at a loss.
She was originally a cautious woman. She is full of low self-esteem for her background, her family situation, and her own illness.
So I left in a daze. In those few months, she received treatment and surgery, thinking that her surgery was successful and she could be with Gu Xuewu.
But the operation failed. Her life was declared to be over soon.
She wanted Gu Xuewu to accompany her through the last journey of her life, but she saw that Gu Xuewu married another woman.
Zhou Ying's mood at this time can be imagined. It is impossible for her to be someone else's third party. She was already ill, and the doctor said that she would not live long, so she saw Gu Xuewu marry another person with her own eyes.
With a double blow, it is impossible for Zhou Ying to return to Gu Xuewu's side.
Gu Xuewu's gaze was fixed on Qiao Xinwan's face, he hoped to get an explanation from her, even if he did see the diary and Zhou Ying's departure. But deep down in his heart, he actually hoped that Zhou Ying's diary was fake.
He hoped that Qiao Xinwan didn't hit her like that, and didn't drive her away from him when she was sick. Didn't say those hurtful things.
The strength in his hands increased again, and he stared at her face: "Tell me, Qiao Xinwan, didn't you know that Zhou Ying was sick? You didn't give her five million. You didn't drive her away. Tell me."
Qiao Xinwan looked at the excitement on Gu Xuewu's face, and her eyes became hot again and again. She knew what answer Gu Xuewu wanted at this time, but she couldn't give it.
Because, what he said, she did.
Finally, she gently opened the corners of her mouth and smiled.
"I know she's sick. I gave her five million, and I told her to leave you, because she doesn't deserve you at all. She doesn't deserve you. "
"Enough." Gu Xuewu couldn't listen any longer, and seeing the stubbornness in Qiao Xinwan's eyes, he clenched his hands tightly into fists: "You, how can you?"
Take advantage of a person's most vulnerable time, when he can't make a decision at all, to do such a thing
If Qiao Xinwan hadn't said those words to Zhou Ying, then Zhou Ying would not have left in a daze. If she didn't leave, he wouldn't drink away his sorrow and give Qiao Xinwan a chance to drug him.
If Qiao Xinwan didn't drug him, if he didn't marry her because of these, then at least when Zhou Ying came back, he could accompany her and walk through the last journey of her life with her instead of leaving Zhou Ying alone in the hospital Here, with no relatives, a person died alone. He will not have this regret.
All of this was caused by Qiao Xinwan. Suddenly accepting these things, Gu Xuewu's mind was messed up, totally messed up.
He didn't know how to face Qiao Xinwan, nor did he know how to face Zhou Ying.
Qiao Xinwan looked at the entanglements and struggles in his eyes. He gripped his hand so hard. Even with a slight tremor.
She didn't understand why Gu Xuewu said this suddenly, but she was sure of one thing. That is, Zhou Ying overwhelmed him again, no matter how long time passed, no matter how gentle Gu Xuewu had been to her, no matter how many times Gu Xuewu said he liked her, deep in his heart, the person he loved was still Zhou Ying.
Except Zhou Ying is still Zhou Ying.
"Why are you so excited?" She didn't take back her hand, but the woman she saw that day, who looked exactly like Zhou Ying, looked at Gu Xuewu with unconcealable sarcasm: "Gu Xuewu. Zhou Ying is back, right? You found out that the one you love is still her, and you want to be with her again, don't you?"
"Qiao Xinwan."
Gu Xuewu shook her hand away vigorously, looked at the mockery in her eyes, and suddenly felt that the woman in front of him was very strange: "Zhou Ying is dead. She has been dead for three years."
This time, it was Qiao Xinwan's turn to be shocked, she stared blankly at Gu Xuewu, unable to say a word.
Zhou Ying? died
How can it be
"She has uterine cancer." Gu Xuewu couldn't believe that Qiao Xinwan didn't know: "Didn't you already know? That's why you said those things to her, and that's why you told her to leave me."
"I..." Qiao Xinwan pursed her lips, not knowing how to react. Once, she also thought about where Zhou Ying was, but she didn't expect that Zhou Ying was dead
This, this was not what she expected. It's not what she expected. Therefore, Qiao Xinwan was also stunned, not knowing how to react.
Gu Qinghan's face was ugly. Clenching his hands tightly, looking at Qiao Xinwan, he didn't want things to be like this. Even if Qiao Xinwan likes herself, even if she says she loves herself. But he thought that she still had at least the most basic kindness in human nature.
She can be pampered and willful, and she can take advantage of other people's illnesses to achieve her own goals.
She can be selfish and brutal, so she also feels she has the right to interfere with other people's decisions. To blow a poor woman's self-esteem
"How can you?" Gu Xuewu clenched his fists, he really couldn't face Qiao Xinwan. He felt that he was wrong: "tell me, how can you?"
"How can you lie to me for so long? How can you not tell me a word? You know that Zhou Ying is sick, and she left because of illness. She is so timid, but you let her face death alone ? Qiao Xinwan, how can you?"
Gu Xuewu clenched his fists and could hardly speak.
Qiao Xinwan sat there, motionless. She didn't know what to say, she only knew that Zhou Ying was dead.
she died? That woman, the thorn in her heart? died? how so
Many messy thoughts flashed through her mind, she raised her head to look at Gu Xuewu, met the disappointment in his eyes, and the words she blurted out shocked even herself.
"Why not? Gu Xuewu, if she doesn't die, I will never have a chance to be with you. So, why not? Besides, so many people die every day in this world. Do I have to pay attention to their death?" Responsible?"
*****
Six thousand words were updated today. Continue tomorrow. . .
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