Feng Zhiwei remained silent, and said for a while, "I can't let such a face die in front of me."
Both of them understood the meaning of this sentence, Ning Yi was silent for a moment, Feng Zhiwei looked up at him, "This is a question I've always wanted to ask, do you have an answer?"
Ning Yi was silent for another moment, and Feng Zhiwei actually saw the confused look in his eyes, and then he shook his head, "I was also very surprised when I saw you for the first time."
This means that she doesn't know the reason, Feng Zhiwei looked closely at his eyes, and felt that although he still seemed to have nothing to say, the words themselves did not seem to be lying to her.
"I'm sorry that Shaoning didn't die and caused you a lot of trouble." After a while she said in a low voice, "But I can only do this."
"That's why we are like this." Ning Yi smiled bitterly, "I don't want to confront each other, but I am always pushed to confront each other by various reasons."
"But I don't understand why there is confrontation?" Feng Zhiwei stood up and stared down at Ning Yi, "Tell me, why do you want to restrict my development in Qingming? Why put me under Yao Ying's subordinates to be restrained everywhere? Why do you think that I will oppose you? Also, why do you pay so much attention to Feng Hao?"
Her bent face was close at hand. Although she was wearing a mask, her eyes were misty and shining, and her long eyelashes were neatly brushed. Ning Yi couldn't help but stretched out his hands to caress, and Feng Zhiwei immediately let her go as if she was electrocuted. open.
"We're talking about business." She said with a straight face, "Concentrate."
Ning Yi felt that her rare shy expression was very cute, so he stared at her for a while reluctantly, and then said: "You have saved Shao Ning twice, and you have an indistinct relationship with her, even the appearance is amazing. Similarly, you have mastered too many of my secrets, but they may not belong to my side, you said, from the perspective of the superior, should you be restricted or even silenced?"
"My lord has never thought of recruiting me as a 'national scholar'?" Feng Zhiwei frowned, feeling that there was always something wrong with Ning Yi's answer.
Ning Yi remained silent, a cup of tea was brought to his lips and he hadn't drunk it for a long time, a faint water vapor rose up, his brows were blurred behind the water vapor.
Feng Zhiwei didn't speak either, she stroked the edge of the teacup with her fingers, it felt warm to the touch, but her heart was cold.
After a long while, Ning Yi said softly: "Zhiwei, listen to my persuasion, leave the officialdom and return to the Qiu Mansion, I will find a way to make He Lianzheng quit, in the future, you will be mine..."
He stretched out his hand into his bosom, a gesture of wanting to grab something.
The hand was held down.
He looked down at the snow-white fingers pressing on his hand, "Are you expressing your rejection?"
Feng Zhiwei withdrew her hand, and said calmly: "Let's make today's matter clear first, and then it won't be too late to talk about it."
Slowly withdrew his hand, Ning Yi smiled a little blankly, and said for a while: "Okay, then tell me first, you are a woman, why don't you want to marry and have children like other women, but you want to take the risk of being in the officialdom? Cautious and bold, climbing up step by step?"
Feng Zhiwei fell silent, looking at Changtian Yunxia with her hands behind her back, her long hair scattered in the wind, covering her eyes that were already clouded by mist.
"There is probably no one in the capital who has seen my father." Feng Zhiwei spoke slowly for a long while, as if he had brought up another topic, "In my memory, he existed before I was four years old."
"He is a busy, indifferent existence that never sees its end."
Ning Yi stared at her in a daze, vaguely feeling that the man who once made a splash in the imperial capital and made a generation of heroines resolutely elope and then return to the capital is the crux of the problem.
"Before I was four years old, my family was still very rich. I lived in a remote mountain far away from the imperial capital. Although the place is remote, the supply has always been good, but my father is often away, and he only comes home once in a while. When he comes back, he treats me and my brother very well." I didn't pay much attention to it, and when my mother saw him, she didn't look very happy, and sometimes the look on her face was a little sad."
Ning Yi frowned, a little puzzled, since he ran away desperately to get married and had a son and a daughter, this couple should be extremely loving and stay together day and night, why is this so
"Because of this, since I was sensible, I have gradually stopped looking forward to my father's return. With him, the atmosphere is depressing, the mood is low, and there is no peace and warmth of the mother and child. In my opinion, such a man makes my mother Parents stay alone in the empty boudoir and raise children alone. Letting children have a father is like having no father. When they come back, they can’t give people happiness. It’s better to have no one.”
"In my long-standing memory, my mother has always told me that although most women in the world are dodder flowers, some people are not so blessed to rely on men. Instead of waiting to be abandoned by fate in the future, it is better to learn How to depend on yourself and love yourself."
"Mother taught me a lot of things because of this, and also taught my younger brother, but my younger brother is not talented. My mother said that I am the elder sister. Since my younger brother is not good enough, he and my mother will rely on me to support him in the future. This is my responsibility. I will always remember it."
"Nonsense!" Ning Yi couldn't help but refute, "How can you, a weak woman, support the whole family?"
"The Feng family does not have weak women." Feng Zhiwei looked at him calmly with clear eyes, "If the women of the Feng family were weak, they would have been trampled into the dust."
Ning Yi looked at her, and suddenly stretched out his hand to hold her hand. The hand in his palm was slightly cool and smooth, soft as if boneless, but there were some thin calluses on the palm, and the thin and hard point touched the bottom of the hand, so he didn't know where it was. Shallow pain.
Feng Zhiwei lowered her eyes to look at the clasped hands, smiled, and pulled her hands away.
"When he was four years old, he really didn't come back." She continued, "Without his supply, the family gradually couldn't make ends meet. Mother had no choice but to take us back to Beijing."
"This is the beginning of me facing the Imperial Capital." Feng Zhiwei smiled at Ning Yi, "From the time when I knelt in the autumn mansion and couldn't open the door and was poured with cold water to wash my feet, I and the imperial capital, and the autumn mansion, The war with the world against bullying will never turn back."
"When you need it the most, no one stands by your side to shield you from the wind and rain. You have to block all the hostility, insults, difficulties, and frame-ups yourself, and you have to find ways to block them for your loved ones. You have been very careful every step of the way. Tired, but no matter how tired you are, you can’t retreat, once you retreat, your life will be decided casually by others.”
"We are a disgrace to the Qiu Mansion. Everyone wants us to disappear. If you don't want to disappear, you have to pay the price." Feng Zhiwei lowered her eyes, "I have lived like this for ten years, and eating in the small courtyard every New Year is the most shabby During the New Year’s Eve dinner, listening to the laughter in the main house, I swore to myself that I would never rely on anyone, never count on anyone, and that one day I would rely entirely on myself, above others, and let those who looked down on me People, Yu Chen looked up at me."