Growing up, I really wanted to love my father and mother like other children, but my parents didn't give me this opportunity. I have accumulated a lot of love, so much that I am reluctant to give it to anyone, and I dare not give it to anyone, because it is ordinary and all I have, but I want to give it to you.
I want to love you with my whole life, treat you with all my strength, pamper you with everything I have, and make you the happiest man
However, if you don't give me a chance, my passionate love can only turn into a hopeless cry before the dark sea. The sky can hear, the earth can hear, and the sea can hear, but it cannot be heard by you
I drank another can of beer in one breath and crushed the can viciously.
With tears in my eyes, I swore to myself: "If he responded to me the last time, it was fate telling me not to give up. If he didn't respond to me, it was fate telling me to give up."
I put down the beer can, stood up unsteadily, put my hands around my mouth, faced the sea, and shouted with all my strength: "Wu Julan, Wu Julan!"
Under the sky full of stars, the sea breeze blows gently, and the waves gently beat against the rocks. I stood on a high rock, like a lunatic, screaming with all my strength, over and over again, as if I wanted to consume all my life in the screaming.
i know no one will respond
I made this oath knowing the result, but I just forced myself to give up
Facing the sea, I called his name over and over again, shouting hoarsely, telling myself that this is destiny, and I have tried my best.
From now on, I will bury this feeling deeply and make him feel that I also think that we are not suitable.
I will tell him that I can let go and forget him, anyway, the only eternal thing in this universe is that everything will perish. Even a star can disappear, let alone a relationship. Please rest assured to leave. My feelings for him will disappear with time. This is an objective law, and everything will not violate it
I believe that I must be very sincere when I say it, even if he stares into my eyes, he will believe it, because I am telling the truth and absolutely not deceiving him.
Only, I won't tell him the time it takes for my feelings for him to fade
My feelings for him will definitely disappear in this world, because, I will definitely disappear in this world
"Wu Julan Wu Julan Wu Julan"
After calling hundreds or thousands of times, my voice finally became hoarse and I could no longer speak out.
Between the sea and the sky, everything is silent, and no voice responds to my call.
This is the final result that fate told me, and the best result
My heart was ashamed, and I raised my head with tears streaming down my face, looking at the sky above my head.
The stars are dense and bright.
In the misty tears, tens of thousands of stars shone brightly, seeming so close to me, as if I could hold them with my hand.
What a dazzling appearance like Wu Julan, becoming your entire starry sky, eclipsing all the gems in the world. But you can only watch, you can never own
I was bewitched and stretched out my hands towards the starry sky, wanting to embrace the entire sky.
Suddenly, a meteor appeared, slid across half of the sky as fast as lightning, and disappeared at the end of the sea and sky.
I didn't even have time to think about the shooting star making a wish, but when my eyes naturally followed its light, the only thought that flashed in my mind was: I want Wu Julan
When the meteor disappeared, I couldn't help calling out again with a hoarse voice: "Wu Julan"
no respond.
I scolded myself with tears in my eyes: "What an idiot"
Knowing it is a lie, but still doing it If you can make a wish on a shooting star, people in the world don’t have to work hard, just wait for the shooting star to appear in the sky every night and make a wish
I was watching the stars and weeping, a thought flashed through my mind like a shooting star, and my body froze all of a sudden.
"If you want to know him, listen not to what he says, but to what he doesn't say."
I stood there in a daze for a while, as if waking up from a dream, I hurriedly took out my phone.
In the call log, the most recent record is "Wu Julan", which was already two hours ago.
With trembling hands, I clicked his name and dialed the number.
The familiar ringtone of the mobile phone rang, although it was very faint, but in this silent night, except for the gentle sound of the waves, it was the only thing that could be heard clearly.
It turned out that it wasn't that he didn't respond, but that the way I called him was wrong.
He's here, he's always been here
In an instant, shock, ecstasy, joy, sadness, bitterness and all kinds of intense emotions surged in my heart, stirring up my brain like boiling water, a misty mist, making it difficult to distinguish between joy and sorrow, and I wanted to laugh and laugh at the same time. cry.
When the ding ding dong dong ended, Wu Julan appeared. Under the starlight, he stood on a high cliff, looking down at me.
When I didn't know he was there just now, I kept yelling at Haitian, as if wishing the whole world could hear me calling him. At this moment, he was right in front of my eyes, but I couldn't make a sound, I just stared at him blankly.
He floated down from the cliff, the darkness didn't affect him in the slightest, and the rugged reef didn't hinder him in the slightest. He was in front of me in a blink of an eye as if he was walking on flat ground.
He is elegant and outstanding, standing in front of me gracefully. His brows were deep and calm, and his expression was calm and unhurried, as if he was not forced by me to come out to see me at all, but came to the appointment after a long time.
In fact, we were only separated for a few hours, but my heart has gone back and forth several times between death and life. Looking at him, it was like reuniting after a long absence.
The joy of being lost and found, the sadness of remaining after a catastrophe, the resentment of being wronged and self-pity, and the nervousness and shyness of facing the one I love. Ask: "Why are you sneaking in the dark?"
"I promised Jiang Yisheng that I wouldn't let you stay alone until I found out the origins of those people."
I understood that he was not found later, but never left from the beginning. When Lin Han and I were talking in the stairwell, he didn't leave, but stood by. Then I left without saying hello
After opening the hospital, he has been following behind.
Then, he should have seen everything and understood everything.
Thinking of him seeing me drinking and buying drunk, lying and saying that I was drinking and chatting with my friends, and those hoarse struggles and pains. I called his name thousands of times. watch me push myself to the brink
Sad and angry, I couldn't help but raised my hand and hit him hard.
At this moment, I really hated him so much, I was merciless, gnashing my teeth and beating him with all my strength, it was like beating a life-and-death enemy.
He didn't move, didn't say a word, and let me beat him.
I beat him, feeling unspeakable grievances, tears streaming down my cheeks, and wept loudly while hugging him.
He finally reached out and patted my back lightly.
With a hoarse voice, I whimpered, "Wu Julan"
This time, he didn't pretend not to hear, but said clearly, "I'm here."
I couldn't believe it, I was taken aback for a moment, and choked up and called again: "Wu Julan"
He said it again very clearly: "Here I am."
I wiped my tears and stared at him like I didn't know him.
Wu Julan stared at me calmly.
I sniffed, stared at him, and said viciously: "I don't give up, no matter what you think, whether you say I'm selfish or thick-skinned, anyway, if I don't give up, even if I die one day, I will leave you with a lot Pain, I will not give up. Compared with you, my life is very short, but I will give my whole life to you"
Wu Julan was silent, just looked at me. His eyes were not the same as before, the indigo brilliance shone in the deep darkness, as if thousands of stars had melted into his eyes, more radiant and beautiful than the vast starry sky.
I asked nervously: "You, what are you thinking?" I was already too afraid of his ruthless indifference, and I was afraid that he would say something hurtful again.
He asked calmly: "This is your choice"
I firmly said: "This is my choice"
He asked calmly, "Even if it brings you pain"
I firmly said, "Even if it brings me pain"
He asked calmly, "Even if it brings me pain"
I firmly said, "Even if it brings you pain"
Wu Julan smiled slightly, and said firmly: "Okay."
I don't know what his "good" means, but his smile makes me forget everything. I just feel that the dark night has suddenly turned into a bright day, and it seems that there is a warm sun shining down, surrounding me and bringing me happiness. Here comes the warmth.
Wu Julan said: "Let's go back, if we stay any longer, you're going to catch a cold again."
His tone was so gentle that I completely lost my thinking function, and I just nodded obediently.
Along the way, he has been holding my hand and never letting go, and I have been in a state of brain shutdown.
Back home in a daze, when he let go of my hand and let me go upstairs to rest, I realized that I didn't seem to ask him what he was thinking.
I stood at the stairs, reluctant to go upstairs.
Wu Julan asked: "What's wrong?"
I mustered up my courage and stammered and asked, "On the beach just now, what did you mean when you said yes?"
He turned and went into the study, came out with a notebook, and handed it to me.
It was the notebook in which he drew three sketches. It was really something I remembered deeply. I couldn't help shivering, gritted my teeth, and took it over.
Wu Julan stroked my head lightly, and said gently: "Don't be nervous, this time it's not." It wasn't anything, but he didn't say any more.
"Yeah," I agreed with my mouth, but I couldn't relax at all.
With the feeling of a strong man going to die, I hurried upstairs with my notebook.
As soon as I closed the bedroom door, I opened my laptop. After flipping through the three sketches, the next page was filled with elegant and elegant words.
After reading two sentences, I breathed a sigh of relief. It was not some cruel and hurtful words, but a prose poem by Gibran on love:
When love calls you, follow him, though his ways may be difficult.
When the wings of love embrace you, obey him, though the knives hidden in those wings may hurt you.
Trust in Love when he speaks to you, though his words may shatter your dreams as the north wind lays waste the garden.
Love will crucify you as it crowns you.
Love can make you grow, but it can also prune you.
Although love can climb up and caress your branches and leaves swaying in the sun; it can also look down and shake your roots deep in the soil.
All of these are the tempering of love for you, so that you can know the secrets deep in your heart, and your cognition will become a part of your life and complete your life.
However, if you are afraid and only seek the peace and joy of love. Well, you'd better hide your true self from the testing grounds of love. Into a world without seasons, where you can laugh, but not with your heart's content; where you can cry, but not with all the tears in your heart.
Don't think you can show love the way, for love will show you the way when it finds you worthy.
After reading it several times in a row, I hugged the notebook tightly and leaned against the bedroom door, smiling with tears in my eyes and closing my eyes.
Just now, as soon as Wu Julan entered the study, she immediately walked out with a notebook. It is obviously impossible to write it tonight. I can't guess when he wrote it, maybe he wrote it after he questioned me that night, maybe he wrote it when he was thinking about it in the past two days.
No matter what, in this relationship, I am not the only one who thinks and chooses painfully. He is torturing my questions, and he is also torturing himself.
Regardless of the process, the result is that we all made the same choice by coincidence, let love be love. As for the pain, we are willing to bear it because this is part of love