A few days before Chinese Valentine's Day, I returned to the small town with Gu Xi.
Huguang Avenue and Luoyu Avenue intersect in the north and south, and are on the bank of the river. I stayed in this hotel, which was fully booked for several weddings.
Among the several huge gold and red brocade notice boards at the main entrance, the large gilt characters shined in the sun, with dragons and phoenixes written on them, one after another.
"Groom: Wang Hui, bride: Zhang An'an."
She finally came out, a little slower than I expected. The person chosen by An An must be one of a million in some respects, and also the most ordinary.
Gu Xi looked at it with unfinished thoughts, stopped there, and said, "It really looks like." He was talking about An An's husband, Wang Hui.
"Actually, Wang Xiang saved me back then." Gu Xi's eyes suddenly turned red.
After many years of separation, we rarely reflected on the past in those two years, but we never saw this reborn figure like Wang Xiang, and each of us felt wet in our hearts. Those who left have all left, including Zhang Dong, Wang Xiang, Xiao Man, the three fathers, and Uncle Zhao and Uncle Zheng.
Everyone wants something, everyone has something to gain, but everyone cannot get what they want.
It seems that there is no longer the pain of hatred in my heart, the pain for An An, the pain for myself, Zhao Yuan and even the two children. At this moment, there is only a vague smile and those happy times.
"Happy wedding. Groom: Yu Huan, bride: Hongyan." My younger sister, Hongyan, is attached to me. Uncle Hongxuan is under the spell of despair. I wonder if he can feel at ease.
"This, I feel the temperament is on par with yours. But it's much darker than yours. Hongyan has really good taste. I saw the portfolio she sent on the road. I was so happy." Gu Xi wiped away her tears and pulled her tight Hold my hand.
"It just so happens that Hongyan said before that he would put you in his portfolio and help you choose a concubine. We will discuss this later." I teased with a smile.
"Happy anniversary of the wedding. Groom: Yun Che, bride: Zhu Ziping." An old friend whom we haven't seen for many years, Sister Ziping is still worried about whether the person she loves the most can't understand her music and flowing water. Sighing silently in the letter, maybe I am never content enough.
"Great wedding anniversary. Groom: Lin Ziwei, bride: Huang Xiya."
At that moment, I thought my father was still alive, and the blood in my body seemed to be flowing backwards. Reason tells me that maybe what my mother will be holding is my father’s portrait.
Eleven years, mother.
Gu Xi and I looked at these familiar names, as if those faces appeared one by one among the stars, so bright and brilliant in our lives. It's like they're right in front of you now.
I gently held Gu Xi's finger: "I want to say selfishly, stay with me, together."
Gu Xi held my hand tightly: "Probably, we have all built a castle in our hearts. This castle has always been indestructible, but as long as there is a crack, it will completely collapse... Wenxi, fortunately, after the castle collapsed, , maybe the world outside is better."
"In those six years, you said you lived a peaceful life, but in fact, it was probably very hard." I heard it clearly.
"You work in a high-end restaurant, isolate yourself from the kitchen, and design the freshest and most delicious dishes every day, but none of them can make you happy... Gu Xi" I held him tightly.
"Wen Xi, the past three years have actually been a crack in me. I can't live in my story, can I? There has never been a movie with three people, and I have never been a part of it, right?" Gu Xi He said slowly, stretched out his hand and gently touched the wedding photos of Zheng Kai and Chen Wanxin. His fingertips lingered in Zheng Kairuo's thick painted eyebrows for a long time, and he sighed softly in the cool summer night: "It's so good."
"You should be your own protagonist." I hugged Gu Xi.
"Happy wedding. Groom: Zheng Kai, bride: Chen Wanxin." I still remember Zheng Kai once left a video on Weibo. He and Wanxin have been reluctant to hold a wedding because they don't want the most important person to be absent.
How could I bear to miss such a day
"If you haven't contacted your protagonist Zhao Yuan yet, do you think we can still have a room in this hotel tonight?" Gu Xi said with a smile.
I was speechless for a moment.
How to contact
Over the years, I have become accustomed to being with Gu Xi. They are two quiet people. In a quiet place, they always seem to be alone. Sometimes they talk as if they are talking to themselves. When you are with a group of the same people, no one knows each other, and there is no need to worry about where they come from or where they want to go.
I have been carrying the wind and sleeves all the way, but it seems that such a familiar human relationship is so heavy that it makes me breathless.
I picked up the phone and dialed the familiar number from when I first went to college 13 years ago. The number that Xiaoman once said was the only one left for me.
The moment the call was dialed, a familiar voice seemed to ring in my ears. I was a little distracted and almost stopped holding the phone.
Yuan, it’s you.
The tired bird returns to the forest, the lonely boat docks in the harbor, the sunset resurfaces over the sea, the moonlight smiles again from the colorful clouds, the fallen flowers in the peach forest return to the beauty of a tree, the sky clears, and the light rain falls on the street , only makes the air clearer and more transparent. It was like a phone call suddenly traveled through thirteen years. At this time, I was thirty years old, and Zhao Yuan there was still a nineteen-year-old boy when he was in school, holding an old Nokia in his hand.
If so, what can I say
Maybe, I would say, A Yuan, take your father and stay away from this place, stay away. . .
Maybe you would say, guard Wenxi every minute and every second, don't allow him to fade out of your sight, don't allow him to run away again, and even marry Wenxi at that time. . .
I was enveloped in an inexplicable emotion, and for a moment I didn’t know whether I was on this eve or in what year.
"There is one last one, why don't you look up?" The mature and mellow, familiar, long-lost voice surrounded me.
Where he pointed, the large LED screen above his head suddenly glowed brightly, and the LED lights shot straight into the sky. The grand and solemn wedding march resounded throughout the street, and the busy street suddenly became extremely crowded. The huge text on the screen announced to everyone: "Wedding celebration: Groom: Lin Wenxi, Groom: Zhao Yuan."
It turns out that this last scene was for me and him.
At the same time, the nearby fireworks and two connected hearts surrounded me and him. In the overflowing light, my eyes gradually became blurred. He had merged into my eyes, and the dizzy world was dazzled. Time has passed, but I know that there is only one him and only one you.
"I'm afraid you'll leave again. I can only wait for you to come before I dare to open this screen." Zhao Yuan looked at me calmly.
Every night, he was guarding the bar and never left.
He was very calm, but the fireworks were blooming with excitement in his clear eyes, and the swallowing in his throat was slow and weak, like the exhaustion and weakness of relief after reaching the end of a long-distance run of tens of thousands of meters.
His hands were shaking slightly, his shoulders were shaking slightly, and his chest was shaking slightly.
I felt the pulse and heartbeat of the world, so heavy that it was as heavy as a mountain and the sea, making it difficult to breathe at that moment.
"Don't leave, okay?" Zhao Yuan hugged me tightly and whispered.
I grabbed his broad back tightly and rubbed my head hard against his face. I didn’t expect that I had just met him, and I was already sinking. I felt as if I wanted to be the same person as him, and wanted to get into him. In my belly, I want to be swallowed by him, I wish that every part of the blood is him, all of him
I nodded with all my strength.
Now that I see a gentleman, Yunhu is not happy.
Zhao Yuan burst into tears immediately.
I hugged him at a loss. I wanted to cry, but I couldn't cry for the moment.
I suddenly understood that I probably thought that no matter how far I ran, Zhao Yuan would still be looking for me or waiting for me, so I never worried that I wouldn't be able to see him when I came back. And he, every time, thought that I would leave like that and never come back. Every time, he would lose it forever and then regain it.
The clerks who were doing business were all stunned. They must not understand why the man who booked such a luxurious hotel could be so rude and unable to control himself. Passers-by came in twos and threes, and then gradually and automatically surrounded us with a radius of four to five meters as the center and a radius of four to five meters away.
The long-lost kiss bloomed like an epiphyllum on the snow-capped mountains.
I know that unless I lose my life, I will never leave again.
No, I will cherish my life and not leave in front of him.
For a moment, I thought of life and death. For a moment, it was as if the separation of life and death was right in front of me. I was suddenly very scared. I was very scared that at the age of 30, I would soon grow old. I would not have enough time to accompany him well, and not enough time to love him well. he.
;The tears immediately burst down the embankment and could not stop, nor did they want to stop.
Yuan, do you know that your tears are the joy of finding something lost, but my tears are the fear of future loss. I don’t want to lose anymore. I lost Zhang Dong, who respected me, loved me, and was so affectionate. Overnight, I lost Hongxuan, who loved me and treated me as if he were my own.
I'm afraid if you leave again.
After a long time, Zhao Yuan held my face and turned my face to look at him: "Fool, why are you laughing?"
I pointed not far away, and Zhao Yuan couldn't help but laugh: "Ah Kai, Ah Kai, you have today too"
There, Zheng Kai hugged Gu Xi tightly in his arms and kept rubbing Gu Xi's head with his straight chin, as lovingly as if he had a biological sister.
The two of them didn't say anything, just four lines of tears fell down together.
I suddenly remembered that time Wang Xiang said that Zheng Kai would be a good father in the future, and my heart suddenly felt relieved.
In my impression, since Uncle Zheng left, Zheng Kai only shed tears for Wanxin and Gu Xi. A corner of his heart was always tender for Gu Xi.
I saw Gu Xi nuzzling Zheng Kai like a kitten. Zheng Kai, who used to dislike Gu Xi lying on top of him, and Zheng Kai who said Gu Xi was disgusting, no longer have any grudges or barriers.
Gu Xi, who had vowed never to come back to influence Zheng Kai and his wife, once they met, everything was filled with the longing and cherishment in each other's eyes.
Wanxin couldn't help stroking Gu Xi's forehead. The love and tenderness in her eyes were the same as those of her husband Zheng Kai. She looked at me with gratitude or miss.
I suddenly felt relieved. How could Zheng Kai and Wanxin make Gu Xi embarrassed between the two of them
Tears after tears, laughter after laughter, all the people came out from the depths of the crowd one by one and gave me hugs one by one. Among the crowd, Zhou Nannan and Wang Zhengjuan also appeared.
I hugged Zhou Nannan, said sorry to her deeply, and punched Zhengjuan several times.
Joys and sorrows, partings and reunions, fate and destiny, everything is in the past after all. After all, they ended up in different places, but she and her family, their parents married each other and agreed that the two families would be related by blood forever. The two of them agreed to have a phone call every day to know that you are there and I am in this corner. They agreed that they would inform each other down to the details of the bra color that day.
This kind of gathering erases all the stumbling blocks in the past.
Amidst the laughter, we knew that Zhao Yuan guessed that I didn't know how to go to the airport, the train station, or take a long-distance bus, so he asked everyone to wait around here tonight.
Admittedly, I got off the train in the next city and took a taxi back.
Then, on the top floor of the hotel, I met my mother, whom I had not seen for eleven years.
Wearing plain clothes, hands clasped together.
When my mother saw me, she took off her plain clothes. What she was wearing underneath was a bright red long-sleeved pleated shirt that my father, Lin Ziwei, had bought for her.
It wasn't until she saw me that she returned to the world of mortals.
My mother did not have a long chat with me. She must have known everything about me from Zhao Yuan.
My mother went to Xiaoman's parents to find the clothes Xiaoman wore when she was a child. She put them in the temple where she once became a monk, asked someone to burn a jar of Buddhist incense, and burned the letters she wrote to Xiaoman.
I also know that it was she, Zhao Yuan and everyone else who facilitated Nan Nan's return and the final reconciliation between the two parents.
"I asked him to tell me everything about you in these years. In every word, I hope that he will not fall behind, my child, in these years..."
My mother was choked with sobs and couldn't make a sound, and I couldn't say anything else.
I know that what she did was to reduce the guilt in my heart, and I wanted to reduce the sin in my heart.
My mother even more eagerly told me personally that Zhang Shouxi was still alive.
She told me personally that she had been to Inner Mongolia, met Zhang Dong’s parents, and showed me photos of the clinic.
She didn't expect me to fall to the ground on the spot, and I was so upset that I burst into tears. I don’t know why, but I always feel that my chest is filled with endless pain and grievance. Zhao Yuan held me in his arms and beat my back in pain.
I couldn't help myself, I wanted the photo as if I was speechless. I wanted to give myself an explanation for the past two years. I wanted to find a box for the tears I shed. I also wanted to say sorry to Zhang Dong personally.
His mother said that there was no need. He only remembered that he was Zhang Shouxi.
. . .
She has only been back for two short months, and she has done everything a mother can do for me, and it has also given me peace of mind at a certain moment.
I looked at Zhao Yuan and stroked his slender face. The joy and sadness were too intense. I almost hung my whole body around his neck and kissed him softly and gently. I accidentally got a snot blister. Zhao Yuan actually gave me a bite to eat, which embarrassed me.
Mother stroked our heads and smiled.
My mother then called me, my sister Wanxin, and my brother-in-law Zheng Kai. She held our hands and slowly told her everything about her biological father and adoptive father, and asked for our opinions.
We know the love she had with her biological father in those years, her despair in those years, the indulgence she had with her adoptive father, and the twists and turns that made the four of us shed tears.
Zheng Kai said emotionally: "Wanxin never dared to mention her parents in front of others... He was afraid that Zhao Yuan and I would be sad. When you came to our home as a guest, she was excited and scared... and told all about it. All her father's things have been put away... When you say this, Wanxin knows that there are still people thinking about him and remembering him, and Wanxin can also be a good child and pay homage on the Tomb-Sweeping Day."
Wanxin shed tears silently: "Brother, I am the one who regrets more and is more ashamed than you. I hope that for the rest of our lives, we can reconcile together, live together, and everything..."
I silently thought about Wanxin's words, and my thoughts suddenly changed.
I have been away for three years. In fact, I am even more afraid.
Three years of changing seasons and three years of dust and tear. Yes, I never thought that I should come back earlier to reconcile with myself and my fate. . .
Nodding, the four hands clasped together tightly.
We, mother and son, chatted until early in the morning. She suddenly smiled lovingly and gently stroked my cheek: "A Yuan's room is next door. You can go there. Tomorrow is a good day for you."
"Mom, you..." I couldn't help but choke.
"Even if the law doesn't recognize it, mom recognizes it and your friends recognize it. Besides, Wenxi, in the end, as long as you and him recognize each other." Mom said with a smile.
It was night, and unexpectedly Zhao Yuan and I didn't talk to each other continuously. We just intertwined our fingers and he held me in his arms.
My heart seemed to have a place to rest, and I had no dreams all night.
This is the most special wedding, a thousand-table banquet. The flowing water banquet extends from the top floor of the hotel to the bottom floor. Four newlyweds, two wedding anniversaries, and all relatives and friends gathered together.
In addition to Zhao Yuan and I's wedding to the groom, when my mother celebrated her pearl wedding, she brought out two portraits. One was of my biological father, Chen Tianjiao, and the other was of my father, Lin Ziwei.
When Zheng Kai and Wan Xin were saluting their elders, they not only knelt down to toast the man's mother, Guo Ciyun, but also toasted to the woman's elder, my mother. When Wanxin and Zheng Kai shouted "Mom" at the same time, their mother solemnly took Wanxin's hand and handed it to Zheng Kai. Later, Zhao Yuan and I toasted to Hongyan’s mother, the widow of Uncle Hongxuan.
The wedding ended. Except for Zheng Kai, whose face was glowing and who was still patting his chest and talking about the hotel security and reception work he had arranged for me, everyone was staggering drunk. My mother was too drunk, or she was too sad and happy. Gu Xi smiled and helped her to rest, saying that he wanted to talk to his godmother about what happened to me in the past few years.
My lovely groom has the grilled fish I gave him in his mouth. The grilled fish on this table was something he and I learned to cook together. People say that running a big country is like cooking a small fish. The first half of your life is spent bit by bit, polishing, pouring oil, serving soup, and steaming. . . .
It seems vaguely like the taste of that time again.
The groom helped me block too much wine. He was lying in my arms, breathing evenly. The smile on his face was like a child who had eaten candy. I heard him murmuring slightly: "I'm not dreaming." .”
As for Mengyuan and Mengxi, one was taking a lunch break on my left knee, and the other was in his father's arms with a satisfied smile.
There was drizzle falling outside the window again, the mortal world was like a mirror, beautiful couples in all kinds of flowers, the world was like frost, and the passing years were like water. At that time, on the fields in the fields, nothing could be seen clearly, but you said you would marry me in the future.
I believe it.