Wei Lan's words made Huan Heng tremble.
Her hand fell on top of his head, as if in the past, looking down at him so condescendingly.
He wanted to grab her so much, wanted to hold her hand in his hand, but there seemed to be a natural moat between that palm and him. He didn't want to cry in front of her, and he didn't want to face her like a child anymore, but he couldn't help it, and his eyes were red under her hands.
Just such a movement made him feel that his whole body was in pain.
The man no longer belonged to him.
In other words, this person has never belonged to him.
She had almost held his hand once, and he had been so close to holding her. When he looked back on the past and followed the path she had walked all the way, he realized that this person had once been so close to him.
It's not that she hasn't stretched out her hand before, but she was hastily pushed out in such a pathetic way by that naive, weak self who couldn't see her surroundings clearly.
He couldn't blame anyone, so at the moment she reached out her hand, he couldn't bear it any longer, grabbed the other's hand, buried his face in the warm palm, and howled.
"Alan... Alan..."
He called her name, but couldn't say anything.
She will not forgive him, nor will she go north with him again.
Wei Lan quietly looked at the crying young man in front of her, feeling a little sad in her heart.
From the age of twelve to now when she was a weak crown, she has always loved and loved this person like a younger brother. Even if she had some thoughts in the middle, after cutting off those thoughts, it seems that it has long been a habit of doting and loving. Pity, but also can not give up.
No one has much resentment against a child, let alone between them... there is not much resentment to speak of.
When she was young, she looked at his handsome face and fantasized about his appearance when he grew up. She thought that he should be a high-spirited general, he should come and go in a smart way, and he should be unparalleled in beauty. You should be presumptuous and unruly, and take whatever you want. The heart is like a clear lake, and the eyes are like the sun, moon and stars. It is completely different from those politicians who play with power and hold back.
No matter how old he is, he can still be like a boy, smiling and shouting, Alan.
But when he really grew up, when he really became a unparalleled handsome young man as she had imagined, he could no longer be as pure-hearted and innocent as a young man. He knelt in front of her, held her hand as if holding the last redemption, and wailed.
Wei Lan felt pain in her heart, as if she had looked at a treasure that had been carefully wiped, and it was smashed to pieces by the world.
She sighed, "Ah Heng, don't be sad."
"You are already the commander-in-chief of the world's soldiers and horses. If you cry like this, you will be laughed at."
"Just for a while..." Huan Heng said hoarsely: "Alan, just for a while..."
"Alan, the north is going to be stable. I will be a responsible and responsible man just like what you told me back then. I will tie the north to me, and I will tie my family and my family to me. On me. I have no self-will or prevarication."
"I will pacify the north and hold the commander's seal firmly in my hand."
"You've done a good job." Wei Lan's eyes were full of pity. This was not the path she wanted Huan Heng to take, but he chose this path, or was forced to take this path, so he just Can not hesitate.
"Alan, don't talk." Huan Heng raised his head and stared at Wei Lan: "Let me finish."
"In the years since you left the north, I have traveled all the places you have traveled, visited all the places you have been to, and asked all the people you have talked with. I have searched for your traces, and in my where it can be done.”
"I know I didn't do it right back then..."
"I know I'm too weak, too childish, and too reckless. But I've been thinking desperately that you'll always love me. Alan, you look romantic and unrestrained, but in your bones you've decided on someone. Thinking of staying with him until the end of life. I thought you would wait for me, thought that I had pacified the north, that I had grown into the person you expected, that I endured all the pain you suffered, and that I made up for all your pain. Sooner or later One day, you will come back to me."
"But Ah Lan," Huan Heng raised his head, staring at the person behind the curtain: "No matter what I do, you won't come back, will you?"
"yes."
Huan Heng smiled wryly, and continued: "You love Xie Zichen, don't you?"
"yes."
Words are like swords, without any hesitation.
Huan Heng closed his eyes, squeezed her hand, and said hoarsely: "Then do you still love me?"
"Aheng," Wei Lan said calmly, "Without any feelings, it can be divided into two halves."
She loves Xie Zichen, how can she love other people
Huan Heng felt as if he was being held under water, unable to breathe. His entire chest was about to explode, and he couldn't help but hunched over.
But he can't stop, he is not the boy who only knew how to escape, he has to move forward, he has to force himself to see everything clearly, force himself, even if he is stepping on the road full of thorns, To go forward.
"Then, Alan," he said with difficulty, "I have traveled the road you have traveled. I have experienced all the hardships you have experienced. You abandoned everything and sent me back to the north. All my deals with the emperor sent you back to the south; you protected me for four years regardless of life and death, and I used the north as a shield to protect your official career. Now your Wei family lacks a state army and can directly be promoted to first-class If you are a big family, then I will send Jingzhou to you."
As he spoke, he looked straight at Wei Lan, word by word, as if opening his heart, and slowly said: "Is there a clear relationship between you and me?"
Wei Lan didn't speak, she felt a sharp pain in her heart.
She lowered her eyes and said slowly: "Do you want to settle with me?"
"Yes." Huan Heng held her hand, feeling that the person's temperature gave him great strength.
"Alan, between you and me, you shouldn't deceive yourself. I'm not your younger brother, not in the past, not now, and not in the future. I have always only had unreasonable thoughts about you, the love between a man and a woman. If you and I Putting these aside, they are just politicians who rule on each side. If you need to cooperate, you and I will join forces, just like before. If you need to confront... "
Huan Heng felt that every word was forced out by him, exhausting all his strength.
He came from the north, and he traveled day and night, exhausting himself.
He thought he could make it in time, and he thought he could stop her. But when he forced himself to wait for dawn outside the door, when he felt the heart-piercing pain that Wei Lan experienced back then, he knew that he couldn't make it in time.
On that night that year, before Wei Lan had time for that night, he was already a lifetime late.
If you make a mistake once, you will be wrong for a lifetime.
So he also understood why it was Xie Zichen in the end.
Because this person is too aware of everyone's weaknesses, this person knows that he doesn't need to intervene too much, he just needs to wait and watch silently, and when that person is in a mess, he comes in a small boat and takes her back.
After she has gone through the world of mortals, she will naturally come to him.
If he understood this truth earlier... If he understood this earlier...
Huan Heng forced himself not to think about these what-ifs, he tensed his body, and heard the person above helplessly say: "If you need to confront, what will you do?"
"Naturally," he said with his body shaky, "how to do it."
Wei Lan didn't speak, she smiled and lowered her eyes.
When she was in her twenties, she also saw the world in this way. I thought everything could be resolved. I thought that as long as I said goodbye to the other party, everything would be over.
When she was in her forties, she realized how naive such thoughts were.
The reason why people are human is that they have hidden and changeable emotions, and these emotions are like transparent silk threads, entangled in this world inch by inch. Human beings are never machines. Feelings can be cut as soon as they are said, and they can be broken as soon as they are said.
She knows, so she will never make such a promise that hurts others and hurts herself.
"Aheng," she finally said, "you are still too young after all."
"I'm not!" Huan Heng yelled, let go of her hand abruptly, and said angrily, "Lan, look clearly, I'm about to enter the year of weak crown, I am the head of the Huan family, from the three northern states. Commander of the 600,000 Army, I am no longer the boy who followed you back then!"
"You don't want it any more," he said with red eyes, making his words extremely weak: "You don't want it any more, say something like this."
He likes people to say that he is too young, and he hates the description of "young" too much.
This description always reminded him how he lost his most important thing.
But he had to admit that every time Wei Lan mentioned this matter, it foreshadowed how childish he had done.
All her life, she had been slowly teaching him.
He wanted to catch up with her, he always hoped to be the Huan Heng that she really expected in her heart, but every time he thought he could do it, the other party would sigh leisurely—A Heng, you are still too young.
So how the hell did he do it right
What can he do, so that he can be like her and Xie Zichen, and not let her sigh and say this sentence anymore.
He wanted to pull back the curtain, wanted to growl and ask this sentence. But he was afraid that she would discover his embarrassing thoughts, his thoughts of chasing after her footsteps so carefully.
He clenched his fists and stood aside, but Wei Lan seemed to read his mind, and said slowly: "Ah Heng, everyone has to go through a very long time when they grow up, losing, possessing, polishing, you Just remember, no matter how smart a person is, they are only human after all.”
"Can't resist desire, can't hide darkness, has feelings, will be sad, even if it's crying bitterly, it's nothing embarrassing or difficult to face. Ah Heng,"
She raised the curtain, revealing that beautiful face.
I haven't seen her for three years, her eyebrows are so delicate that she looks more and more like a woman, but her sparse and open air gives her an astonishing beauty mixed between men and women.
She stared at Huan Heng, he now looks like an adult man, with resolute and handsome lines, deep brows, and three-dimensional features, completely displaying the beauty he had when he was young.
He stared at her blankly, feeling his heart throbbing, and heard her slowly say: "Go with your heart, when you have gone through all the roads, you will naturally understand where you should go. Before that, I No matter how much I tell you, you won't understand."
"No amount of words is worth walking the road by yourself."
"What if I hurt you?"
He made a bitter voice, and Wei Lan smiled: "If this is really your way, it's inevitable. Could it be that I told you not to hurt me, and you wouldn't?"
"Aheng, the choice everyone makes is the one he chooses in his bones. Only after being hurt will he really understand that he was wrong. I told you so many times back then, only when you meet love Only people can do those things, have you heard me again?"
"Now that you regret it, it's just because you lost me completely after you made a random decision to be with Tang Mo and imprison me. That's why you feel that you did something wrong."
"Aheng," Wei Lan chuckled, "Some people are destined not to be possessed. Sooner or later, you will eventually let go."
Huan Heng didn't speak, he stared almost greedily at the face of the person in front of him. After a long time, he finally closed his eyes.
No matter how reluctant, there is finally time to go back.
"Alan, if what you said is really right, then you go your way, and I will go mine. Jingzhou gives you, you and I owe you nothing, and I will give you three years."
"Three years later," he opened his eyes coldly, "Ah Lan, I won't show any affection."
Wei Lan didn't know what to say for a while, Xie Zichen walked in with his hands clasped in his sleeves in a coquettish manner.
He looked Huan Heng up and down, and said calmly, "Is it finished?"
Without waiting for Huan Heng to speak, Xie Zichen simply said: "After you finish speaking, get out, this is my home."
Huan Heng turned around and left, originally he didn't want to give Xie Zichen a chance to say this, who knew that Xie Zichen spoke too fast.
When Huan Heng walked out, Wei Hua turned his head and smiled at Wei Lan, mouthing: "Congratulations."
Then he left a letter and chased Huan Heng up.
After the two left, the frost in Xie Zichen's eyes instantly melted. He sat on the edge of the bed, let Wei Lan lean on him as if she had no bones, and waved to the others, and asked them to bring Wei Hua's letter up.
"Does it still hurt?" Xie Zichen asked gently, and Wei Lan lay lazily on him, feeling that this humanoid pillow was extraordinarily comfortable: "It doesn't hurt too much, it's just that it's hard to take a bath, I'm being lazy."
Xie Zichen opened the letter, handed it to her, combed her soft hair, and said gently, "Have you taught Huan Heng a lesson?"
"How could I teach him a lesson?" Wei Lan said nonchalantly, "He is in my heart, after all, he is just a child."
"Are you sad?" Xie Zichen's tone was gentle, and Wei Lan didn't hear any dissatisfaction. She scanned the letter and said casually, "What are you sad about?"
"Did you feel sad when you were in the north?"
Wei Lan didn't speak, she remembered that night.
How can you not be sad
It's just that she is different from Huan Heng, she is old and used to patience, and doesn't like to show all the sorrow and joy on her face.
So she just stood at the door, let Xiaoyu soak her clothes, and then when the man opened the door, she smiled and turned to leave. Then he became seriously ill, that's all.
"Actually, sometimes I think," Wei Lan said slowly, "if I met him at the right time, maybe it would be fine."
When Huan Heng also experienced the vicissitudes of life, when Huan Heng met her at a well-polished age like she and Xie Zichen, maybe it would be nothing.
Xie Zichen smiled softly, and said gently, "Even if you meet at the right time, you won't be together."
"Why?" Wei Lan was a little curious, looked up, and saw the smiling eyes of the person above her head: "Because, there is still me."
"I'm here, how can I let you be together?"
Wei Lan knew that he was telling the truth, Xie Zichen was unscrupulous in anyone he liked. It was just watching people order, Huan Heng didn't need to intervene at all for him, so he didn't intervene.
Wei Lan sighed: "You should also be thankful, if it wasn't for Huan Heng, who needs your intervention, maybe you and I wouldn't be together."
Can she tolerate Xie Zichen meddling in her feelings
Xie Zichen lowered his head and rubbed the tip of her nose, bit her lip, and murmured: "No, what I do, don't I think about what you will think first?"
"I've always followed your will, haven't I?"
Wei Lan didn't speak, she lowered her head and kissed him, he put his hand into his clothes, the maids retreated quickly and closed the door.
The two are newlyweds, and both have just gotten interested, Wei Lan is fine, she has kissed at least a few people in her previous life, but Xie Zichen has never been close to a woman, everything is from Wei Lan. Now it is even more clingy, wishing not to leave half a step away.
There were few people in the outskirts of the city, and the two had agreed with their parents that there would be no such rules, so when Huan Heng left, the two of them had no time to rest.
Bedroom, study, lobby, courtyard, corridor…
Wei Lan has always been a person who likes to pursue fun, and Xie Zichen is also good at following others, so the two of them have been chaotic until they return to the court at the end of the holiday, and then they have a rest.
Everyone in the imperial court knew that Xie Zichen was married openly and secretly. For this pair of dogs and men who went to the court hand in hand, everyone said that they had hot eyes, extremely hot eyes.
There were also some people who couldn't accept the bizarre behavior of the two of them, and secretly belittled them behind.
Xie Zichen heard rumors that he was a rabbit raised by Wei Lan, who was crushed by Wei Lan. There was a burst of fire in the study.
Wei Lan said casually: "They're all villains, but you just broke your sleeves. Why are you angry? If you are really angry, it's just such a sixth-rank official. If you abolish it, you will be abolished. Why get angry?"
"I'm not angry at him for saying I've broken my sleeve," Xie Zichen said angrily, "Who depends on you?!"
"Pfft..."
Wei Lan couldn't help laughing out loud, raised her eyes and said, "I think what he said is pretty good. How about I take care of you?"
Xie Zichen glanced at her sideways, dissatisfaction in his beautiful phoenix eyes. But for some reason, Wei Lan felt that such a sideways glance made her feel that someone had poked her heart, itchy.
She smiled and waved to Xie Zichen, Xie Zichen was a little puzzled, but still walked over: "What's wrong?"
"Zichen," Wei Lan sighed, "I have a spot that hurts."
"Where does it hurt?" Xie Zichen frowned, and immediately said, "I'll call Da..."
Before he finished speaking, he was dragged onto the couch by the man, turned over and pressed on him, put his hand on his chest, and said with a hoarse laugh: "It hurts here. Can Zichen help?"
Xie Zichen was taken aback for a moment, and then he came to his senses. He smiled calmly, lay on the bed, put one hand behind his head, looked at Wei Lan with a smile and said: "It just so happens that there is also a pain in the lower part."
The two of them shamelessly received insults and glances from all walks of life in the hall. But it didn't take long for everyone to discover that those who cursed were either sent to the countryside to work, or were found out, and the person who stood at the head of the hall stood smiling every day without any interference from words. It's time to show affection and love, without any influence.
So everyone realized that the problem was wrong, until one day someone who was biting Xie Zichen yelled angrily: "Xie Zichen, you rabbit, and Wei Lan are doing things together! You think Wei Lan is a man disguised as a woman and If you're married, don't others know what's going on in private!"
Xie Zichen heard the words, smiled coldly, but said: "You say that Wei Xiang married me, but you still dare to say that I am Master Rabbit?!"
The direction of this rebuttal is a bit wrong...
Everyone thinks so.
After a while, Wei Lan said slowly: "Your Majesty, this lord is guilty of lying and slandering the second-rank officials of the imperial court so recklessly. Does your Majesty think this is the way to go?"
Su Bai leisurely opened his eyes.
Xie Zichen and Wei Lan join forces, no one can stop it at all. Now Huan Heng wrote a letter to change Jingzhou governor to Wei Xiong, which clearly gave Jingzhou to the Wei family. Whether a family is a first-class family depends on whether it can control a state capital and have an army. Now Wei Lan not only relies on Huanheng, but also has the actual control of Qingjing and Jingzhou. After joining hands with Xie Zichen, there is no room for Su Bai to speak out.
So Su Bai waved his hand, and said lightly: "Drag it on, the staff will be responsible for one hundred."
Saying that, Su Bai raised his head and glanced at the courtiers: "In the future, if there are any people who talk about important court officials indiscriminately, they will be dealt with accordingly."
The cursing official was slightly taken aback, and after a while, he burst out laughing and cried out, "Heaven has no virtue, let this treacherous minister be confused and superseded! Where is the Ming Lord! Where is the law of heaven!"
The man was dragged down crying, and the sound of the stick came from outside.
Xie Zichen frowned, but Wei Lan took it easy. The court was quiet, and no one dared to speak.
Not long after, the guard came in and said worriedly: "Your Majesty... beat... killed..."
Su Bai showed a surprised expression, and then showed sorrow, and said helplessly: "That's... let's do it."
Xie Zichen glanced at Wei Lan with some concern, but Wei Lan smiled and said, "Your Majesty, now that this matter is settled, I would like to ask, what do you think about your Majesty's thoughts when I played a reform before?"
Su Bai's complexion changed, Wei Lan and Xie Zichen had already talked about the reform for a long time, and everyone quarreled and quarreled, and the quarrel was almost the same. Wei Lan was about to speak, when Xie Zichen said: "Your Majesty, I have heard what the ministers said recently, which is very reasonable. After the integration, a new plan has been drawn up. I hope Your Majesty will have a look."
Wei Lan was robbed of her words, she frowned and looked at Xie Zichen, but saw Xie Zichen's face was indifferent, as if she didn't know that she robbed her of her words.
After handing over the booklet, everyone quarreled for a while, and then went down.
Wei Lan and Xie Zichen went home together, Wei Lan had a smile on her face, but the smile didn't reach her eyes: "Why, Mr. Xie is so eager to claim credit?"
Xie Zichen didn't speak, he raised his hand and let Wei Lan get into the carriage with him, and said with downcast eyes: "You don't have to provoke me, I won't let you stand out for things like reform."
Wei Lan froze for a moment, then turned to look at him.
It was the spring moon, the palace was full of apricot blossoms, and the wind mixed with the apricot blossoms floated down, falling on the young man in the purple official robe behind him.
His handsome face was full of determination, seeing Wei Lan looking at him in surprise, he smiled slightly.
"How can I be willing to put you in danger?"
The author has something to say:
[Interview·Xie Zichen]
Mo Shubai: "Zichen, how did it feel for the first time?"
Xie Zichen: "Not too good..."
Mo Shubai: "Why? Because of instant shooting?"
Huan Heng: "Hahahaha you shot in seconds hahahahaha..."
Su Cheng: "Hahahahaha, you shoot in seconds, hahahahaha..."
Wang Xi: "Hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha..."
Xie Zichen (smiling): "Although I shoot instantly, I am pure. You guys? Ha ha."
Huan Heng, Su Cheng, and Wang Xi: "I have pierced my heart."