Before Chen Mingsheng's mother came back, Yang Zhao rushed there once.
Chen Mingsheng was very surprised when he saw her come back. He opened his mouth to say something to her, but Yang Zhao interrupted him.
"Tell me when your mother is here."
Chen Mingsheng said in a low voice: "...she will leave at night."
"Okay." Yang Zhao said, "Then I'll come tonight."
"Yang Zhao..."
"Don't you want me to come?"
"No," Chen Mingsheng said, "my mother treated you—"
"You can come if you want me, I want to come too, I will talk about other things later." Yang Zhao stood up and left quickly.
Back at the hotel, Yang Zhao was lying on the bed. She wasn't sleepy, but she was extremely tired.
Yang Jintian was sitting on the sofa in the hotel, looking at Yang Zhao.
He said it again.
"Go home, sister."
Yang Zhao didn't have the energy to answer him.
Yang Jintian said: "You taught me that everyone has their own place, and they will be comfortable only when they stay where they should be. Sister, are you happy with him?"
Yang Zhao sat up, and she looked at Yang Jintian fixedly.
"His name is Chen Mingsheng." She said slowly.
Yang Jintian looked into her eyes, but still didn't call out his name.
"Why do you think I'm not happy with him?"
Yang Jintian said: "Look in the mirror, where are you happy?"
"Xiaotian..." Yang Zhao lowered her head and pressed her temple, she said, "Chen Mingsheng is not a bad person, why have you been refusing to accept him?"
"because of you."
Yang Zhao clenched the edge of the bed tightly.
Yang Jintian's answer seemed to be completely irrelevant, but at the same time seemed completely reasonable.
Because of you, I have a feeling that you are vulnerable and sad because of his presence.
"Sister, you can like him, that's your business. I won't accept him. As long as you are still what you are today, I will never accept him. "
Yang Zhao's head was lowered, Yang Jintian couldn't see her expression.
After being quiet for a while, Yang Jintian felt that Yang Zhao might be a little sad. But he still didn't change his words.
Yang Zhao raised his head.
She was actually laughing.
Yang Jintian imagined her many reactions, but she didn't think about it, she was laughing.
And it wasn't a wry smile, it wasn't a helpless smile, it was a real smile, a little tired, a little pale, but a real smile.
She said to him: "Xiaotian, you are finally a bit like a member of the Yang family."
At night, Yang Zhao returned to the hospital.
She secretly came to Chen Mingsheng's ward. Chen Mingsheng's mother had already left.
Yang Zhao stood at the door for a while, she was a little hesitant whether to go in or not.
It was too late now, and she was wondering if Chen Mingsheng should not disturb him if he had a rest.
Just when she hesitated, the door opened.
Wen Lei saw her and whispered, "Sister-in-law, are you here?"
"Yeah." Yang Zhao said, "Are you here today?"
"Yes." Wen Lei paused for a moment, and then said, "Sister-in-law, I heard... about the matter between you and Brother Sheng's mother, she may have misunderstood, we will explain clearly, you—"
"I know." Yang Zhao interrupted him, she knew what he was going to say.
"Is he asleep?" Yang Zhao asked.
"Not yet, Brother Sheng fell asleep during the day." Wen Lei made way for Yang Zhao and said, "Then I'll wait outside."
"sorry to bother you."
Yang Zhao entered the room without turning on the light. She quietly came to Chen Mingsheng's bedside, and he was awake, looking at her.
Yang Zhao turned around and opened the curtains.
The moonlight came in.
Yang Zhao returned to Chen Mingsheng's side and sat for a while. The room was very, very quiet.
"Does this color look familiar?" Yang Zhao said.
Chen Mingsheng didn't understand the tone, so he raised his hand with some difficulty and put it on Yang Zhao's.
Yang Zhao looked at the sky outside the house.
The moonlight sweeps the room into a light silver-blue color, with a gray and cold tone, a bed, a window, a moon, and two people.
"It's really familiar..." Yang Zhao murmured.
"Yang Zhao..." Chen Mingsheng said in a low voice, "My mother is a bit weird...don't worry about it."
Yang Zhao shook his head, took his hand, and still looked out of the window.
They talked a lot in the night.
Chen Mingsheng obviously struggled to speak, but he just kept talking, as if he wanted to tell Yang Zhao everything he had to say for the rest of his life.
He told her his life experience, told her that he had two fathers in his life.
A father who was born but never met, and a father who taught him to be a man without blood.
These two fathers, with vocal or silent language, and powerful or weak actions, have pushed him in a predetermined direction since he was a child.
He told her that his mother had loved his father all his life, until the end, it was almost crazy. She felt that a woman must stay by a man's side and take care of her for the rest of her life.
"Do you regret it?" Yang Zhao asked him.
Chen Mingsheng was silent for a long time, and finally shook his head.
Yang Zhao laughed, "Really? Not showing off?"
Chen Mingsheng seemed to think about it for a while, then shook his head lightly.
When his life is more ups and downs, and the farther he goes, he will believe in fate more and more. So he has no regrets.
He believes that everything is preordained.
And he can't regret it either.
If he bows his head at this time, it means that he has denied everything in the past, his father, Yan Zhengtao, old Xu Wenlei, and even Yang Zhao.
"... I don't regret it." Chen Mingsheng said.
Looking back, I have no regrets.
I just have a little bit of regret.
If I can be smarter, if I can work harder, maybe I will be better than I am now.
Yang Zhao stroked his face, she turned her head and looked out the window.
"Enough, Chen Mingsheng." She said, "Enough."
"If possible," Chen Mingsheng said, "if I get better, I'll go see your parents..."
Her hair covered her face.
In Chen Mingsheng's sight, her image was a little trance.
He didn't notice that his hand twitched many times during the speech. All his attention was focused on Yang Zhao.
"Are you crying?" He asked suddenly.
The hand Yang Zhao was holding was trembling slightly. His spirit was a little confused, and he attributed the trembling to Yang Zhao.
When he asked this sentence, Yang Zhao's hands really shook slightly.
Chen Mingsheng smiled faintly, "Are you crying?"
Yang Zhao turned his eyes slowly. She didn't cry, but the suppressed sadness was more painful than crying.
But her voice was still flat.
"If I cry, would you like to get better?"
Chen Mingsheng was at a loss. He looked at her in a daze, then at the ceiling, and finally said, "I'm sorry... Yang Zhao, I'm sorry."
Yang Zhao lowered her head, and her lips lightly pressed against Chen Mingsheng's chapped lips. She kissed him again and again.
Chen Mingsheng's breath lingered on her face, his smell was the same as before.
You have never seen such a kiss, it is so heavy that it is hard to breathe, and it is so light that it seems to have ceased to exist.
You, too, have never seen such a desperate kiss.
It seems that what is kissed is not a lover, but a broken dream.
She breathed close to him, she was intimate with him.
Chen Mingsheng raised his hand and gently stroked Yang Zhao's hair.
"Do you want to smoke?"
Yang Zhao shook his head silently.
"Let's smoke..."
Yang Zhao whispered, "Chen Mingsheng, this is a hospital."
"Smoking..." Chen Mingsheng's voice was a little relaxed, "I want to smoke too, it seems like I haven't touched cigarettes for a long time."
"You're not in good health yet."
"Give me one..." Chen Mingsheng didn't seem to care at all, he smiled and talked to Yang Zhao, like a big child. "Or we smoke one."
Yang Zhaozhen took out a cigarette from his bag.
She held the cigarette in her hand and looked at it for a long time.
She suddenly asked: "Chen Mingsheng, do you know how long it takes to make a bottle?"
Chen Mingsheng said, "I don't know."
Yang Zhao said, "The time for two cigarettes."
She lit the cigarette, and the cigarette butt was bright for a moment in the light of the lighter, then gradually faded, and finally melted into orange sparks. At night, the smoke seemed very close, like a blooming firework .
In the end, she didn't let Chen Mingsheng touch the cigarette, she only let it light up for a moment, and then extinguished it.
She said: "Chen Mingsheng, I'm leaving, you can rest."
Chen Mingsheng said yes.
She stood up and came to the door. Before opening the door, she looked back at him again. It was too late at night, and she couldn't see Chen Mingsheng's eyes clearly. She just felt that he seemed to be looking at her.
He seems to be smiling.
"Yang Zhao..." he said softly, "Thank you."
Yang Zhao didn't know what to say, nodded and opened the door.
Wen Lei was waiting at the door, and when he saw her come out, he came up to meet her.
"Sister-in-law, are you leaving?"
"Um."
"You've worked hard, and—" Wen Lei stayed up all night until now, his eyes were a little red, and he said to Yang Zhao, "I'm also wronged...Brother Sheng's mother came back at five in the morning and left after ten in the evening. She also told us that she would replace us, and she would just watch over here at night. If that happens, it will be even more difficult for you to see Brother Sheng."
Yang Zhao whispered, "It's all right."
"Let me think of a way." Wen Lei said.
Yang Zhao nodded, said thank you, and turned to leave.
She walked out of the hospital gate and finished a pack of cigarettes in the empty street. Then she called Xue Miao—
"Xiao Zhao?" Xue Miao was very surprised when she answered the phone, "What time is it now? Am I insane or are you insane?"
"Boss, can you do me a favor?"
This time, Yang Zhao didn't even have the strength to respond to his teasing.
Xue Miao was quiet for a while, and then her tone became serious.
"Tell me, what's the matter."
Yang Zhao said, "I want to take someone there for treatment."
"What disease?"
Yang Zhao said, "Drug poisoning."
Xue Miao was quiet.
After a while, he said, "It's him?"
"Um."
She heard Xue Miao take a deep breath, "Xiao Zhao, does he take drugs?"
"No." Yang Zhao said, "I can't explain clearly at the moment, you can help me contact a better hospital." She said, "Please..."
Knowing her like Xue Miao, at this moment, I already know that there is no need to ask any more questions.
"I see. You go back and have a good rest. When you wake up, I will almost have news."
"Thank you."
"No, it's nothing." Xue Miao replied in a low tone.
Yang Zhao stayed up all night, thinking about how to convince his mother.
She thought a lot of words, even in the middle of the night, sitting at the table and drafting, until the early morning, she was in a trance to clear her mind.
Yang Zhao took a shower early, and she stayed up all night, her complexion was extremely bad, but she didn't dare to make up for it with makeup, so she simply tied up her hair, wore a half-sleeved T-shirt, and a pair of long trousers.
She came to the hospital and bought a bouquet of lilies at the flower shop downstairs. When she paid the money, she was still rehearsing in her mind what she was going to say next.
She hugged the flowers and walked into the gate of the hospital. Instead of taking the elevator, she walked up the stairs, going up layer by layer.
She was tense, more tense than ever.
When Yang Zhao walked to the turn of the stairs, she heard a shrill scream.
The scream was a dagger, which pierced Yang Zhao's head, and slowly spread to the lower jaw.
That was Chen Mingsheng's mother's voice.
Yang Zhao suddenly saw the neatly painted walls of the stairs, and a small bug crawling in the corner, the bug was black, lying on the white wall, as if lost.
In the endless cold light, Yang Zhao saw the dark night, and in the strong smell of the potion, Yang Zhao smelled a trace of Buddha fragrance.
Chen Mingsheng died of sudden heart failure.
No one expected such a situation.
No one knew that Chen Mingsheng's health was already very bad, especially his energy. When his thigh was amputated back then, he did not handle it properly, which made his physique look good, but his vitality was seriously damaged.
This time, he didn't hold back anymore.
In other words, he didn't want to push down anymore.
Chen Mingsheng's mother shouted frantically in the corridor. She's calling a name—
Chen Guoying.
She kept calling that name until she collapsed.
The corridor was in chaos, Yang Zhao walked over slowly with the flowers in his arms. When Wen Lei saw her, he plopped and knelt down in front of Yang Zhao. He said sister-in-law, I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
Their voices were far away, and they could reach Yang Zhao's ears clearly.
A young nurse came over with a stack of papers, looked carefully at Yang Zhao's face, and said, "Family, please condolences, we still have a few things to sign—"
Another nurse pulled her aside and glared at her.
"Look at the time, you."
The nurse also thought it was wrong, and said sorry.
Yang Zhao raised his hand to her and said, "Give it to me."
The two nurses looked at each other, and one of them handed her the paper. Yang Zhao wrote his name on the paper.
The nurse asked: "Excuse me, are you... are you his wife?"
Yang Zhao was stunned.
no.
She is nothing.
She returned the pen to the nurse.
"Sorry, I misremembered..."
At this time, the young nurse looked at the name on the paper, "Your name is Yang Zhao?"
Yang Zhao glanced at her.
The nurse opened her mouth and said softly, "The patient is at the end, and I read your name."
Yang Zhao was quiet for a while, then said lightly: "Really." She asked the nurse, "Can I see him?"
The nurse nodded and they led her into a room.
Yang Zhao walked in, and there was a single bed next to the wall of the room, on which lay a person covered with a white cloth.
His right leg was deeply sunken.
Yang Zhao walked over and exposed Chen Mingsheng's face.
She couldn't describe him as falling asleep like those TV dramas and novels said.
he died.
He had nothing to do with falling asleep, he was completely dead, with no signs of life.
Yang Zhao approached him, and the familiar temperature was gone.
She whispered in his ear, "What do you want to say."
What do you want to say.
You called my name at the end because you wanted to say something to me.
"You can't do this, Chen Mingsheng." Yang Zhao said softly, "You have to finish your sentence."
Chen Mingsheng was quiet.
He seems to be so quiet forever.
Yang Zhao looked at him and saw that he was hardly recognized.
She leaned down and kissed his lips.
The empty silence was even more pronounced when she actually touched him. Yang Zhao didn't care, she kissed his lips, her chin, neck, chest, lower abdomen...
She kissed his genitals, and finally, her kisses came to his right leg.
That missing limb, that broken memory, that key that opens the door to the story.
Yang Zhao finally cried.
She finally cried when she kissed his leg.
Do you regret it
I do not regret.
Looking back, I have no regrets.
I just have a little bit of regret.
If I had been smarter then, if I had worked harder, maybe I would be better now.