That night, Yunye asked Lide to come out for a drink.
The two of them were sitting on the edge of the wooden corridor around the courtyard, the early autumn wind blowing on their faces felt cool.
The night is fine today, and the sky above the courtyard is a bright river of stars. After the hustle and bustle of the day faded away, the night of the city lord's mansion was surprisingly quiet, only the occasional sound of blacksmithing could be heard in the distance, and it didn't sound noisy at all, just like the occasional bells from a remote mountain temple .
Yun Ye sat very quietly, spun the wine bottle in her hand a few times, lowered her head and said:
"Well, I'm really sorry for today's day."
Lide's eyes were chasing the last firefly flying around in the yard, and Yun Ye beside him mustered up his courage and continued:
"The city lord is deliberately taking the matter of provoking conflicts to himself in order to preserve my reputation? I know... even I can see this kind of thing. But in this way, the city lord has to do it again This villain. Thanks to the city lord, I can sit in the dark and dream about the future like now, so I will do my best to repay you."
After Yun Ye finished speaking in one breath, she turned sideways and bowed deeply to Li De, and said:
"I didn't come from a famous noble family. Although I know that money touches people's hearts, in my heart, the kindness during this period is more important than how much money comes. Thank you, the city lord, for looking up to me, and thank you, the city lord, for treating my father, younger brothers and sisters Let us stay, thank you Lord City Master for being this villain for me."
Lide witnessed the firefly flying towards him, and after flying around him a few times, it stopped on the shoulder of Yunye, which was very close to him, shining with light.
He turned his head, looked at Yun Ye, smiled and said:
"Because I have no desires, so when others entrust me with interesting dreams, I will help them realize them."
Lide put his hands in his sleeves, looked at the night sky above his head, and said with emotion:
"Drinking a bar, you have to be worthy of the night."
Yun Ye nodded vigorously, pulled out the cork, and filled her and Lide's glasses with wine. What I drink today is plum wine. There are pickled green plums in the wine bottle. The light yellow wine has a sweet fragrance of plums. The feeling of being in an air-conditioned room in a cool summer.
As she drank one glass after another, Yun Ye's vision couldn't help but blurred for a while.
She lifted her hair, unbuttoned the top two buttons of her clothes, closed her eyes, and the memories of the past spewed out in an instant. To be honest, after waking up last time and knowing that she joined Yuxi City until now, Yun Ye has almost no sense of reality. Every night when she lies in bed tossing and turning and cannot sleep, Yun Ye suspects that her current life is just a dream. Once you close your eyes, you will return to that home again, to the life bound by countless invisible chains.
She didn't feel a little bit safe until drinking with Lide today.
Once the body and mind are relaxed, you can't help but think of your former self.
…
In fact, the earliest Yunye was not what she is now. At that time, she was full of vitality from beginning to end.
No matter what kind of setbacks you experience, you can heal yourself. Not only can you bear all the pressure alone, but you can also bury all the sadness in your heart, touch the heads of your brothers and sisters with a smile, and patiently coax those who fell Wrestling will cry for a long time clingy fine.
When she came to Lingyun City, she was wearing an old gray dress, with a hole in her shoes, and her little toes were exposed. Because she was reluctant to spend money to hire a car, she walked out of the deep mountain with a pair of legs, covered in mud spots, light gray His hair was haggard and his face was dirty. Only those eyes are still bright.
She looked at the outside world curiously, and when her eyes met the people on the side of the road, Yun Ye would sigh in her heart, wow, everyone is so beautiful.
It's clean, good-looking, and has a temperament, which is completely different from Tutu's self.
After arriving at the messenger group, Yun Ye put down her dilapidated luggage and wanted to take the initiative to talk to the people around her, but was ridiculed for having a country accent. The young girls don't care if their words hurt others, they always tease Yun Ye together intentionally or unintentionally, saying that you can't even speak official Chinese well, why are you here to be an emissary, and the grandmother who sells eggs on the roadside is more suitable than you.
Yun Ye just smiled foolishly, but felt a little inferior in her heart for the first time.
She wanted to prove herself, to display her talent and learning, but no one was willing to listen. Just like most people don't want to listen to old beggars, no one in Lingyun City wants to listen to Yun Ye. Similarly, there is no short-term room for promotion in the envoy group, and Yun Ye doesn't want to rely on sleeping with others to get to the top. She is still a very traditional little girl, and she feels that even holding hands can only be done with someone she likes.
No matter how many thoughts there are, if it is not her turn to speak, there will never be a chance to speak out. Even if you finally get the opportunity to speak, you will not be taken seriously because of your identity, seniority, interests, etc., or your own opinions will become others' original ideas after a while.
If things go on like this, even Yun Ye can't help but start to doubt her ability.
The last straw that crushed Yunye was the way passers-by looked at her.
Every time she walked on the street, she was greeted with silent and scrutinizing eyes. The sneer in those eyes was grandiose, but she couldn't step forward to say anything. Yun Ye is still very energetic, because she knows that she must be very lively and talkative in order to win a little chance to speak at the negotiating table, but gradually, she also began to get used to walking with her head down to avoid collisions. catch the eyes of others.
— Am I really this material
—Is anyone really willing to listen to me
—Could it be that I don’t have the talent in this area at all, but I’m just a shallow frog in a well? It’s just that I have read books with my grandparents for a few years, learned some rebuttal skills, and thought about the general trend of the world a few times. In fact, it’s just this level, right
Yun Ye wants to believe that she has the power to change the future, but inevitably falls into a situation of self-doubt.
So she often showed a wry smile to herself in the mirror, and said in a voice that only she could hear, "I really don't have enough vitality", but quickly cleaned up all the negative emotions. She is like an exquisite earthen jar, no matter who knocks it will give a crisp answer, but no one has looked into it, no one has seen the empty heart.
…
Under the night, Yunye held the cup with ten fingers and sipped the wine, sitting side by side with Lide, her voice was as clear as the night sky:
"Actually, for me, it doesn't matter if the money is a little less. I have already told Mr. Shoufu that after I have made some achievements, it will not be too late to get some more money. I have such a high salary when I first arrived. , I can’t even sleep at night with peace of mind.”
Yun Ye turned to Lide who was holding the wine glass, smiled lightly and said:
"The most important thing is that here, finally someone looks me in the right eye, and finally someone is willing to believe me. Because of this trust, I can re-realize that I am not useless. There are still things in this world that only I can do." matter."
So you can muster up your courage even when you don't have alcohol.
Without worries about the future, you will not be afraid of generals and princes.