Competition is friendship.
Hard work is freedom.
Obedience is power.
There were three clear lines of words written on the peeling white wall. The boy stood in the office, staring at the white wall outside the window, in a daze.
The boy's name is Yi Wan. He is ten years old this year. As early as three years ago, he was diagnosed by the hospital with some kind of functional disorder. Autism, high functioning, or something else? When his parents really got the result, they were shocked. They drove Yi Wan to the corridor outside the door and asked the doctor. A few words leaked out from the crack of the door:
"In fact, most of the time, there is nothing abnormal about him..."
"Will this disease affect his college entrance exams? High functioning... does it mean his IQ will be a little higher than others? Will it affect the continuation of the family line?"
One last word.
"... In fact, Yi Wan's mother is still young, so it's not too late to have a second child at this time."
Just like what the kids in elementary school said to Yi Wan.
"Yi Wan, I heard from mom that you have high-functioning autism. Does high-functioning mean high IQ? You are so shameless to brag about yourself."
There are also some nicer words.
"Yi Wan, like you, can you concentrate more on your studies?"
"High-functioning... the IQ should be very high. Yi Wan, can you do this math problem?"
They surrounded Yi Wan and asked about his well-being. In Yi Wan's mind, they turned into a group of little people dancing hand in hand around the campfire. Among the villains, there was the doctor who examined him absentmindedly, speaking jargons to the child that he could not understand with his mouth opening and closing; there were parents who started quarreling after leaving the clinic, and before the divorce, they used their mouths to gossip about the genetic pedigrees of their two families, just to prove that "Yi Wan"'s abnormality was the other party's fault, so as to divide more property; there were some parents who spread Yi Wan's symptoms everywhere, covered their mouths at the end of the gossip, and used a sentence like "Oh, I don't mean anything else, it's just so pitiful..." to atone for their own gossip; there were also some teachers: some asked Yi Wan to collect the homework of problem students, because Yi Wan was very well-behaved, and only he would stubbornly complete the action of "collecting homework" before leaving even if he was pushed into a puddle by the problem students; some asked Yi Wan to participate in some puzzles or elementary school mathematics competitions; and some spoke loudly in the office: "Novels say that high-functioning autistic people are geniuses, but I think the Yi Wan in our class is just average..."
When they consider this "disease", it seems that the first thing they care about is whether someone can benefit from it. Yi Wan said that when they pay attention to a disease with a long name, they first pay attention to the attribute part that can benefit themselves and play a role in society. For example, high-functioning autism, they will wishfully think: "Ah, high function, high IQ? That's great. It sounds fashionable to have the love of such a genius/it sounds like he can do something." When they pay attention to this kind of disease, they are looking at this. For them, compared with this "genius", the attributes related to "autism" are no longer important. It is even a bit "cute" because it makes the "genius" no longer high and might be bargained for. They can "buy him" at a relatively low price, and the main function is better than other similar products and is not damaged, so they naturally have a sense of superiority and closeness. Even many movies and TV shows about love do this, and people are angry about it. But compared to discrimination and bullying, this is much better.
But don’t these so-called “geniuses” have a kind of despair in their hearts? Lacking a certain function does not mean that they cannot feel it. It seems that the people around them are tolerating this freak for the benefit that he/she can create. Yes, they are still freaks. No one regards them as people of the same country as them. They just think that the functions that freaks have are cool, and these “coolness” makes up for the disadvantages of freaks. Freaks live in a transparent shell, unable to handle these complex emotions, and they can’t even feel their own despair. So later, people called their story “love”.
Yi Wan wanted to say that it was not his fault that he got sick. But Yi Wan probably didn't want to say that because he was only ten years old and couldn't handle such profound emotions.
He could only see the head teacher who was talking to him raised his eyebrows - it seemed that he was distracted. Yi Wan was always distracted, not because of ADHD or other diseases, but because for him, his focus was often different from that of ordinary people. And this time the head teacher did not tell him that he should come to the office and watch him at the same time. He did not say that he could not do this.
In fact, Yi Wan was not very good at distinguishing the emotions on people's faces. But he heard the head teacher say: "... Yi Wan, I don't think you are suitable to stay in this class. You are not even suitable for this society."
It's time to get off work. Yi Wan can leave.
He found his scattered things on the floor again in the classroom, as well as traces of graffiti on the table - in fact, Yi Wan didn't understand why the graffiti on his table made those children excited. When Yi Wan stood on the graffitied table, they would raise their hands like a group of little savages, running around and spinning excitedly, just like the primitive society spinning around the campfire.
Yi Wan thought of a statement in a coloring book. Human genes are exclusive. In ancient times, there was a long-lasting war between Homo sapiens and Neanderthals. Neanderthals and Homo sapiens looked very similar, so the concept of "uncanny valley" was born - for Homo sapiens, it is a creature that looks like you, but is not you, but will tear you apart. Ten thousand years have passed, and Neanderthals have disappeared, but the instinct of rejection is still implanted in the DNA of Homo sapiens. People will subconsciously gather together and reject creatures that are similar to themselves but different. Therefore, these children are running, which is the role of this excellent self-protection gene. The way they run and circle around him is also in line with the actions of the primitive world around the campfire. It is an interesting coincidence. This shows that from ancient times to the present, even if the environment and technology have changed, people themselves have never changed - in a society where everyone always emphasizes that "turbulence" is bad, isn't this something to be thankful for
Yi Wan should be happy for them. Just like what the head teacher said: "You need to have this society in your heart, then this society will accept you. If you don't have this society in your heart, don't blame this society for executing you."
He then picked up his things one by one from the ground. During this process, a little boy came over and said hesitantly that Yi Wan had something thrown away "somewhere" by them, and Yi Wan could follow him to get it. In fact, Yi Wan saw that he was pushed out of the door by the group of boys who always threw his things away and laughed. He also knew what would happen next: the little boy would take him to "somewhere", where Yi Wan would be subjected to new pranks - such as being forced to touch the reproductive organs of the "David" statue by his hand, and then they would laugh and say that Yi Wan's mind was full of pornography - a taboo word that could be used to humiliate people. They did this many times, and it never failed.
But Yi Wan could also learn this routine. This time he shook his head and said no.
The children left. Yi Wan didn't know how they could always enjoy this kind of activity, since Yi Wan had no expression most of the time. He then started thinking about Neanderthals again.
There were a few things not in the classroom. Yi Wan found that the classroom window was open. He leaned out and found that things had been thrown down, such as his empty schoolbag.
Yi Wan didn't like things being thrown downstairs. There was a flower bed downstairs, and his schoolbag would get muddy. His aunt would scold him if she saw him - yes, Yi Wan's parents were divorced. His father first threw Yi Wan to his uncle and aunt's house from Monday to Friday in the name of working in another place. Later, he simply came back only on holidays.
But sometimes things are just like this and there is nothing we can do about it. Whether it is the father who comes home during the holidays or the children who have been contributing to the stability of society.
Yi Wan decided to go to the library to read. The library was not far away, just a few hundred meters from the primary school. The schoolbag on his back was wet, but everyone carried schoolbags to and from school, so it was nothing. This was Yi Wan's imitation of integrating into society. But he was still thinking about the little story of the Neanderthals. Would other people in society want to know the story of the Neanderthals
The reading room is small. But Yi Wan likes it because it not only has old books but also computers. Yi Wan likes using computers, which bring him a different world. He even learned to type without any teacher, and his typing speed is very fast. So the head teacher once said, "Yi Wan is indeed a high-functioning autistic person," and asked him to do some typing work.
Why did he start to associate again
There are books about Neanderthals in the library. But they are too obscure and in English, so Yi Wan can't understand them. Besides that, Neanderthals appear in books like "The 100 Most Horrifying Unsolved Mysteries in the World". They sell better than the previous books. It's hard to tell whether it's because of the sensational title or the content, or because the words "world" and "100" give people the illusion that they can understand the world better than others after reading it. Yi Wan read the content about Neanderthals in this book. One page discusses whether Neanderthals are reproductively isolated from humans, how their women have sex, and what is the difference between their women's genitals and those of Homo sapiens women. Yi Wan looked at the page next to this book, which tells another "horrifying unsolved mystery". Women in a certain tribe in Africa would put circles of silver rings around their necks to lengthen their necks to become more beautiful. As they get older, they would add new silver rings to their necks again and again until the skin on their necks was stretched to the limit and became as thin and fragile as paper. The last paragraph of the book says in a sensational tone that these girls who grew up to be women could not take off the silver rings on their necks. These former restraints and tortures have now become the support of life. Once they are taken off, their necks will break like paper - snap. Then their heads will roll down. In other words, they will die. After taking off the silver rings that are like shackles and used to transform them, they will die.
Isn't death a very scary thing for most people in society? Yi Wan still remembers that when he heard the news of the principal's death during the flag-raising ceremony in the morning, other children said that "Yi Wan will definitely be an antisocial villain when he grows up" because he didn't cry or show sadness. But the tone of the book was very excited, as if this was a very interesting thing. This time no one came to criticize the book. It was published. Things that can be published, like textbooks, like student rules, are good things that can bring enlightenment to people. Yi Wan didn't understand why there was such a difference.
Excited, maybe it was excitement, Yi Wan couldn’t feel too many emotions.
Are they trying to imitate giraffes? But they can't eat leaves. Why do people add silver rings around their necks as they grow up to turn themselves into giraffes
Yi Wan began to fantasize about giraffes again. Giraffes replaced Neanderthals and became the theme of his mind today. But he did not forget about Neanderthals. Before leaving the library, he used the library's old computer to go online and search for Neanderthals. The search engine related words such as "Neanderthal reproductive isolation", "Neanderthal female prisoners of war", and "Neanderthal sexual intercourse".
It's a bit absurd, a bit monotonous, and a bit like a whale in the deep sea seeing SpongeBob. It's the same as the focus of the book, with no difference.
The library was closed. Yi Wan was the only one among the bookshelves, just like an elephant in the oceanarium of a zoo. The old lady administrator said, "Little Yi Wan, you are alone again."
Yi Wan said: "Yeah."
Yi Wan was very polite. He felt that he should respond to the kind old lady's greeting. But he didn't know what to say. He couldn't talk to the old lady about Neanderthals and giraffes. So many times he just said "hmm".
But the old lady seemed to like Yi Wan's quietness. She said, "When are you going to bring other children with you? Look at you, you are not like other children who play with friends in the yard after school. You look lonely, which is not good."
Yi Wan said: "Yeah."
He walked out of the library slowly, thinking about giraffes. Soon he found that he was not alone.
Because the children around the campfire were obviously not satisfied yet and followed him.
…
"Yi Wan is so shy? Like a little girl."
“Hahahaha, hahahahaha!”
Yi Wan was cornered by them, and several kids took colored chalks and scribbled on his body. He stretched out his hands to block them at first, but this seemed to make the boys even more excited. They pressed Yi Wan down and continued to scribble on his face, pink, white, red, green, yellow, blue and blue.
Yi Wan then began to associate again. He was thinking that primitive people used shells as currency, the Mayans used cuneiform characters, they would use the fruit of a wild flower to squeeze out red juice, and use that juice to draw on the stone wall... Blue is the most precious color, so before the Renaissance, only religious paintings would use a lot of blue, because God is supreme, and it should be worshipped with the most expensive color...
"My mother said Yi Wan looks like a little girl."
"Do you want to see if he's really a little girl?"
Yi Wan was still immersed in the world of red and green. Blue was extracted from turquoise, and red was extracted from hematite. Ancient European painters would extract and make pigments by themselves, just like creating a colorful new world of fantasy from a pile of stones... Was the sky I see now extracted from turquoise
"Hey!" someone shouted, "What are you doing? Let him go!"
The voice came from a teenager. The children said, "We are playing..."
"Is this a joke?" the voice said sternly, "You are bullying! What you should do is apologize to him! Which school are you from? Judging from the school uniforms, it's Zhongbei Primary School? I'll go find your class teacher!"
The children rushed forward. Only Yi Wan was left. The boy walked towards Yi Wan and saw him still lying in the alley, covered in colorful clothes, staring at the sky, as if in a daze.
But there were no tears in those eyes, nor was there the fear, terror or anger that people imagine. A small shadow fell on Yi Wan, and the boy said, "You... can't get up? Are you injured somewhere?"
Yi Wan said: "I'm looking at the sky..."
He stared at the sky, as if he was in a daze as if there was some unknown puzzle in it. The boy was stunned for a moment, but did not move.
He first stood, then squatted, and finally just sat down, looking up in the direction Yi Wan was looking.
Time ticked by. The sky changed from blue to red-orange and finally to purple-black. When the stars came out, Yi Wan propped himself up with his arms and tried to get up.
Someone reached out to him.
"Shall I pull you up?" the man said.
The boy who appeared out of nowhere didn't leave.
He also held out his hand, asking him to hold him.