It was just dawn when the phone on the bedside table rang. Subconsciously and quickly turned off the alarm, and continued to sleep, after two seconds Fu Xiao reacted. She opened her eyes, looked at the familiar ceiling, and realized that she was no longer in England.
she's back.
He just returned to China yesterday, and he will get up early today, his brain is groggy, but Fu Xiao's spirit is very clear. She quickly washed her face and brushed her teeth, but as soon as she opened the door, she could smell the faint fragrance of rice.
She walked to the restaurant in surprise, and it happened that Fu Cheng had served two bowls of porridge.
Fu Xiao: "When did you get up?"
Fucheng: "Just half an hour earlier. Sis, do you want porridge?"
The two siblings sat at the table and had breakfast together.
Seeing Fucheng drink the porridge spoonful by spoonful, Fu Xiaocai breathed a sigh of relief. It seemed that it was not as serious as she thought.
She will never forget what Fucheng looked like when he first got sick two years ago. He was so thin that he was almost a bone. When Fu Xiao received the news and went to the army to pick him up, her younger brother was skinny and his face was almost pale. When he saw her, he still smiled at her, telling her not to worry. .
Then how can you not worry!
She took Fucheng to many hospitals, the United States, and the United Kingdom. After the situation finally stabilized, she returned to Shencheng and continued to take care of her body.
After eating and changing clothes, Fucheng was still a little hesitant. "Sister, I went to Dr. Zhao last week, and I have already taken the medicine."
Fu Xiao stared at him: "No, follow me to check again!"
"… Um."
When I arrived at the private hospital, I had a CT, an MRI, and some blood tests. In the afternoon, Fu Xiao took his younger brother to find Dr. Zhao.
Dr. Zhao is a young doctor in his thirties. Although he is young, he is quite famous in treating anorexia. After carefully reading the film and the test sheet, he prescribed some medicine and a few bottles of nutrient solution. The two siblings are also acquaintances. Dr. Zhao looked at Fu Xiao, then at Fu Cheng, and said helplessly, "The recurrence rate of AN disease is actually not very high, only about 0.5%-3.7%. The rate is lower. Most of the AN patients I have seen are caused by excessive dieting, so even after a temporary cure, as long as there is an opportunity, there will be a possibility of relapse. But Fucheng, you are not, you are because of the sudden death of your family Passed away, resulting in extreme depression, which caused mental anorexia."
Putting the test sheet aside, Dr. Zhao said: "I have also talked with your sister. My suggestion is that you go to a psychiatrist and have a good counseling. Of course, I mentioned this suggestion two years ago. I hope you can accept it this time."
After leaving the hospital, Fu Xiao was still thinking about what the doctor said: "Ah Cheng, why don't you find a psychiatrist."
Fu Cheng smiled helplessly when he heard the words: "Sister, you know what I really need."
Fu Xiao froze, and after a while, she said, "What if Rogge 318 can never be found?"
Fucheng was silent for a moment: "It's okay."
Fu Xiao looked at him, wanted to speak, but didn't know what to say.
After a busy day at the hospital, seeing a doctor and infusions, it was already evening when the two left.
After taking a taxi back to the community, the two got off the car at the intersection.
Fucheng was holding a black plastic bag with the hospital logo in his hand. Fu Xiao told him to eat well while opening the mobile phone delivery app: "Forget about tonight, it's too late, just eat some takeaway, wait until tomorrow, I will Cook for you, you know."
Fu Cheng: "Sister, how long have you been on leave?"
Fu Xiao: "Why, one week. But don't try to run away. If your health still hasn't improved after this week and you still vomit, I'll ask for another week off and take good care of you!"
Fucheng: "..."
Fu Xiao complained: "Oh, I knew I wouldn't have used up the annual leave earlier this year. When I was on honeymoon with your brother-in-law this year, I played a few more days and used up the annual leave. It's good now. I originally reserved seven days of annual leave. , I want to wait for your birthday next month to return to China to accompany you. Let alone your birthday now, maybe there are not enough holidays."
"It's okay, I'm fine, sister, you can go back in two days."
"How about that, I have to watch you, I can't let you go on like this."
Fucheng smiled and rolled his eyes, and said in a gentle voice, "I'm fine. You saw it with your own eyes when you came back this time, and you heard what Dr. Zhao said today. It's all fine, it's not that serious. And you haven't gone back, just It's not good to leave my brother-in-law alone in the UK. I'm fine, wait two days... "
The voice stopped suddenly, and the smile on Fu Cheng's face froze. He looked at the man standing under the street lamp not far away. After two seconds, he turned his head, smiled again and said to Fu Xiao: "Wait for two days, You go back to England."
Fu Xiao also saw the man standing at the gate of the community.
The sky was getting dark, and the street lights on both sides of the street were on. The model-like man was standing by the side of the road, leaning on a Ferrari, with his hands in his pockets, smoking a cigarette and looking up at them. This area is a high-end community with good greenery. The summer was covered by thick shade, and the noisy cicadas resonated in the towering trees. The man clipped his sunglasses to the neckline of his T-shirt, and his long hair was tied behind his head, forming a small knot. He lowered his head slightly, the fine hair on his forehead fell down around his neck, his eyes were quiet and silent.
He has been quietly looking at Fucheng.
Fu Xiao: "Are you a friend, Ah Cheng?"
After a long time, she heard her younger brother's soft reply: "Yes."
"Sister, you go up first."
Fu Xiao frowned and wanted to ask about the situation, but seeing her brother's soft eyes, she was silent, nodded and said, "Okay."
Fu Xiao took the plastic bag containing the medicine in Fucheng's hand, turned around and entered the community.
Fucheng walked over.
"Teacher Zhuo," his voice was calm, and his expression remained the same as usual, he asked, "Why are you here?"
Zhuo Huan didn't answer, but looked at Fu Xiao's back: "Who is that?"
Fu Cheng: "My sister."
Zhuo Huan glanced at him, and slowly stood up straight: "Today you asked for leave."
Fucheng said lightly: "Well, I remember that I asked you for leave this morning."
"Ask for leave to go to the hospital to see a doctor?"
"..."
"What disease?"
Fu Cheng looked up at him and asked, "Is it related to you?"
Zhuo Huan's eyes moved, he held the cigarette between his fingers, and fixedly looked at the young man in front of him. After a while, he clicked his tongue softly, and said, "Walk with me." After speaking, he threw the stubbed out cigarette end into the trash can beside him, and walked away.
He walked under the streetlights, leaving the bright place step by step, and walked towards the dark place not illuminated by the streetlights. He didn't look back, but just said that sentence, as if he knew that the people behind him would follow him for granted. But this time, Fu Cheng stood where he was, silently watching Zhuo Huan go further and further away.
Zhuo Huan turned his head: "Fucheng."
Fu Cheng was stunned.
"Why, come here."
"..."
"Deduct your salary."
"… Um."
Fu Cheng followed.
Because it is surrounded by high-end residential areas, the floor area ratio is very low. Walking along the walking path, you will soon arrive at an artificial lake. On an August night, the evening wind was mixed with humid heat, and it had just rained in the morning, so it wasn't too stuffy, and the nose was full of astringent mud.
Zhuohuan put his hands in his pockets: "How are the preparations for next week's test flight going?"
Fu Cheng: "No problem, I have confirmed it three times."
"Will your illness affect the test flight?"
"Won't."
There were boring and repetitive frog sounds in the artificial lake, no one spoke, and the air was silent for a moment.
After a while, Zhuo Huan asked, "What's wrong with you?"
Fu Cheng raised his head slowly, his eyes suddenly looked into the cold eyes. His throat seemed to be choked, and it was difficult to speak. After a long time, he said quietly: "It's not a serious illness, and it has nothing to do with you."
The two walked a few more steps.
Zhuo Huan: "How did you get mental anorexia?"
Pupils constricted, Fucheng turned to look at him in astonishment. The next moment, he clenched his fingers, turned around and left, Zhuo Huan cursed in a low voice, and then grabbed his wrist: "What are you doing, Fucheng!"
"Does my illness have anything to do with you?!"
Seeing the young man's cold and angry eyes, Zhuo Huan suddenly fell silent, and after a few seconds, he asked irritably, "I'm not fucking caring about you?"
Fucheng: "When did I ever need your care?"
Zhuo Huan tightly gripped Fu Cheng's wrist, and he laughed angrily: "Are you fucking sick..." Are you sick!
The last two words were not spoken, they were drowned in the reddened eyes of the young man.
The heart paused silently, and the thousands of feelings that rushed down like a flood quickly spread out in my heart. Irritability, helplessness, anger, remorse, too many strange and never-before-seen feelings all rushed out, Zhuo Huan looked at Fu Cheng's red eyes, his lips moved, but he didn't know what to say.
Fu Cheng turned around and was about to leave again.
He still held his wrist firmly.
"The last time you vomited in the bathroom, it wasn't because you felt disgusted when you kissed me..." It should be an affirmative and confident tone, but in the end, Zhuo Huan was silent for a while, and added two words: "Is that right?"
Fucheng didn't look back, after a long time, he replied in a dull voice: "En."
Zhuo Huan: "What's going on, that disease."
Fu Cheng shook off his hand vigorously, and walked away.
"… Hold!"
The man strode after him, and grabbed his hand again: "Nie Xiang said that your illness is related to Rogge 318. Is it because of Rogge 318? The victim whose surname is Fu?"
Huge anger suddenly surged in his heart, Fucheng raised his head to look at him, and asked fiercely: "Don't you know? If you have seen something, you will remember it all after seeing it three times. You always know that my family is On that plane, you knew from the beginning, you are asking me now?"
Zhuo Huan pursed his lips slightly, but still asked: "...is that your father?"
Fucheng smiled, his eyes were red, and he squeezed out words one by one from between his teeth: "Yes, you know everything. Yes, my father died in that plane crash, and my mother was also on it. I got anorexia , you know all of this. But I’m just a friend who slept with you and was fucked by you, so I’m not qualified to tell you what to do, and I’m not qualified to control your life. What about you, Zhuo Huan? Are you sick! What do you care about me, does my business have anything to do with you?"
Zhuo Huan was speechless for the first time, and looked at him blankly.
Finger by finger, he separated the man's hand from his wrist, and Fucheng looked at him without blinking. Obviously, he could humiliate him again in the same way, but looking at this man's face...
Can't say it.
Fucheng was silent.
He lowered his head, his expression blocked by his drooping hair.
After a long time, he seemed to calm down.
As the evening wind blew past, Fucheng: "Well, my anorexia is due to the Rogge 318 crash. At first it was just a backlog of emotions. Later, when it was confirmed that the plane would not be salvaged and the investigation was over, it suddenly broke out." Pause , He raised his head and asked: "... Is there anything else, Mr. Zhuo?"
The young man's eyes were quiet and gentle, like a pool of stagnant water, looking at him without any fluctuations.
Zhuo Huan's lips parted, but he didn't speak.
Fu Cheng gave him a deep look, and walked away.
He walked one meter, two meters, farther and farther. Zhuo Huan just watched like this, suddenly, he gritted his teeth and chased after him.
"Fucheng!"
As if he didn't hear anything, Fucheng continued to walk forward.
Zhuo Huan chased after him and blocked his way: "Fu Cheng!"
Averting the man in front of him, the young man looked calm, like a puppet holding money. When the heart is dead, there will be no more heartbeats, no more injuries, no more sadness.
Zhuohuan followed him: "Don't do this."
What else
In a trance, he suddenly thought, what happened to him, and what Zhuo Huan wanted from him.
"Don't do this, okay?" Zhuo Huan said hoarsely, grabbing the young man's arm.
Fucheng raised his head slowly, looked at the man with reddish eyes and hoarse voice, and after a long time, he said, "Actually, I never told anyone. My parents shouldn't be on that flight, I suggested They changed the flight. They were supposed to get on the plane in the early morning of the next day. I told them that my teacher was on the Rogge 318, and he was the captain of the Rogge 318. My dad said, that’s just right, he can Changing the flight so that when I go to pick them up at the airport, I can meet the teacher and get together with the teacher."
Word by word, Fu Cheng spoke softly, as if he was just talking about a trivial matter.
Tears fell down.
He wept quietly, thought for a while, and asked Zhuohuan: "I killed them?"
The heart stopped beating at this moment.
The rusty blunt knife grinds the flesh and blood in his heart. He has never loved or loved someone like this for a moment. Zhuo Huan stretched out his hand and hugged the thin and frail young man into his arms, whispering in his ear, "It's not you."
Fu Cheng: "Do you think the air crash of Rogge 318 has something to do with the captain Qi Zhifeng?"
Immediately realizing who Qi Zhifeng was, Zhuo Huan said, "Until we see the wreckage of the plane and find out the truth, no one is guilty. I never doubted the possibility of the captain committing suicide."
Fu Cheng: "Oh, I doubted it."
Zhuo Huan was startled, and looked down at Fucheng. There was no expression on the handsome young man's face, he quietly raised his eyes to look at Zhuo Huan, and said, "You want to know why I have mental anorexia? Let me tell you. Because I killed my parents .Because in the years after the air crash, I have wondered more than once whether the captain, whose son died, his wife was seriously injured, and owed huge debts, could not bear the mental pressure and chose to commit suicide with the plane. Even if this People are my mentors, even if this person is the person I admired the most, he was so kind to me... But, I doubt him, I have doubted him more than once."
"Zhuo Huan, I'm sick, I'm sick of myself."
"So, I dare not go to a psychiatrist, I dare not tell anyone."
"Don't you want to know, then I'll tell you." Pushing away the man's embrace, Fucheng looked at him and said, "You said that I pretend to be fine on the surface, but what kind of person is I? Man, I know it myself. Yes, you're right, I'm disgusting, I'm disgusting as a person."
After saying these words as if nothing had happened, Fu Cheng looked indifferent and walked away.
"Fucheng..."
A man's hoarse voice sounded in the quiet path.
The wrist was pulled from behind, and the next moment, there was a tight and suffocating kiss.
When the tongues touched, the sour taste of the tears at the corners of the mouth rolled on the tip of the tongue. The bitter smell of smoke in the man's mouth eroded all senses of touch. There was a moment of astonishment, and slowly, Fucheng closed his eyes, and stretched out his tongue to kiss back. Breathing continuously, saliva made a click sound, he kissed this person in the slightly hot night wind, and did not let go until he was about to suffocate.
Panting with his lips open, Fucheng was hugged into his arms before he recovered.
Zhuohuan lifted his chin, forcing him to look at himself.
The four eyes met, and there was a few seconds of silence.
Zhuohuan: "Come back."
Fu Cheng: "Where are you going?"
Zhuo Huan lowered his head and kissed his lips: "Together."
Fu Cheng moved his lips.
Zhuohuan lowered his eyes and said softly: "...I love you."