Unspeakable

Chapter 31

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When Tang Xiu pushed open the door of the ward, Gu Yansheng was wiping Shen Kanyu's face and neck with a warm towel.

Tang Xiu came over and stretched out his hand to try the temperature of Shen Kanyu's forehead, but Gu Yansheng stopped his paws in the air without lifting his eyelids.

"What are you doing? I'll see if it's still burning." Tang Xiu originally wanted to curse, but was afraid of waking Shen Kanyu, so he could only lower his voice and stare at Gu Yansheng fiercely.

"It's gone," Gu Yansheng said softly, "Don't wake me up just now.

"... Oh," Tang Xiu felt aggrieved, and said to himself that you put a towel on someone's face. People who snore so blindly can't wake them up, but can I wake up if I touch my forehead? If you don't let me touch it, just say it. Picked up a precious koi, "When will it be over, I will tell you something."

Gu Yansheng frowned: "I can't say it here?"

"No, come here."

Gu Yansheng stood up reluctantly: "Then hurry up."

When the two arrived on the balcony, Tang Xiu cut to the chase and said straight to the point: "I found out what kind of operation Xiaoyu had. Liver transplantation, partial liver resection, and transplanted it to his father."

Gu Yansheng's chest was suffocated, he opened his mouth but did not speak.

"During the preoperative examination, he was found to have dilated heart disease, severe anemia, and low blood pressure. Normally, organ transplantation is not allowed, but he and his family insist on it."

Gu Yansheng's face was ashen, listening to Tang Xiu silently, and then slowly spit out a few words from his mouth: "His family, also insist?"

"Well," probably feeling that what he was going to say next was too exaggerated to be true, Tang Xiu frowned and remained silent for a while before continuing, "I read the records in the system, he bought a lot of nutrients before the operation Liquid and syringes, probably because I was uncomfortable and couldn’t eat. I was afraid that it would affect the operation, so I bought these things and took them home to hang the water by myself... If you can’t eat, you will definitely not be able to hold on. The nutrient solution is a life-threatening thing, not a tonic. So during his operation, his cardiovascular function was abnormally weak, and his heartbeat even stopped for a while—”

Tang Xiu looked up at Gu Yansheng, gritted his teeth, and said, "Gu Yansheng, you are like a pig with no morals and no abilities. I really don't understand why God treats you so well and leaves you small fish and fry. How hard is it for the fish to survive and persist until now? On the day of the reception, I sent him to the hospital. He had a cut and coughed up blood. The pain made his whole body twitch. I just told him that Ah Sheng is still waiting for you, and he never said that again, endured any pain, and obediently cooperated with everything the doctor told him to do."

"Look, he will listen to everything you say. If you let him survive, he will survive. If you let him go home, he will go home. If you tell him to go away, he will go away. The young master can do whatever he wants, right? Have you ever thought that it will be very hard for him? You just rely on him to always listen to you without saying a word, and just do whatever you want?"

Tang Xiu smiled sarcastically: "Master Gu, you have to be reasonable in life, bullying a fish that can't speak, do you have a sense of accomplishment?"

Gu Yansheng had turned his back to Tang Xiu long ago, his hands had been clasping the railing on the balcony tightly, his veins were bulging, and his knuckles were turning white.

He stood there listening to Tang Xiu finish speaking, his whole body was like petrified, he didn't make a sound or move, but when he faced Tang Xiu again, his face was pale and his eyes were blood red.

He didn't respond or refute Tang Xiu's reprimand, but asked in a hoarse voice: "Do you know why he can't eat?"

Shen Kanyu is still inseparable from nutrient solution injections. The little porridge he ate when he woke up a few days ago was vomited out by him in a daze. What, when it is serious, it will choke out when drinking water.

Tang Xiu didn't expect him to ask this question. He swallowed the lecture in a daze, and confirmed hesitantly: "Can't eat anything? Can't you eat anything? Porridge, noodles, fruit, all of them?"

Gu Yansheng nodded: "I vomited after eating. Is it because I'm pregnant?"

"No way... How long have you been pregnant just now, and the early pregnancy reaction is not so early." Tang Xiu frowned and thought for a while, "I peeled an orange for him to eat, and he was very happy to eat it. Zhenzhen also fed it before. He has eaten half a bowl of noodles, his appetite seems to be good, and he hasn't vomited yet."

Gu Yansheng frowned and listened, the doubts in his eyes gradually disappeared, replaced by sadness.

He gets it.

Tang Xiu peeled oranges for Shen Kanyu, and Tang Zhen fed him noodles, and he could eat them all without throwing up, because he was not there at the time.

Shen Kanyu just couldn't eat in front of him.

Gu Yansheng remembered how long ago, since he casually said "I feel sick when I see you" at the dinner table, it seems that he never saw Shen Kanyu eating at the dinner table again. Originally, when eating at the same dinner table, what he cooked was not the amount for two people. He always took food for him with great interest, and helped him stir the boiling hot soup to a suitable temperature for his mouth. There were shrimps and crabs. For the food that humans need to peel, he will use special tools to peel it, and put the white raw meat in a clean bowl for him. I was busy washing the dishes and tidying up, and rushed to the live broadcast.

Later, after he said that sentence, Shen Kanyu never went to the dinner table again. Every day, he prepared the meals and served them on the table, and then did housework on the side, waiting for him to finish eating before coming to clean up, and then asked him a question with a smile Is it delicious? Are you full? He never responded to him, but he would ask every time.

He was never even seen eating normally again. He doesn't know what he eats every day, so that he has so much energy to be busy all day long.

After Shen Kanyu left home, he walked into his bedroom again, and found a box of unfinished instant porridge under the bed, and a small box of dried radishes in bags. Running down to eat exactly the same thing. He checked the prices of these things on the Internet. A box of 50 yuan, he can eat for ten days and half a month.

Fifty yuan may not be enough for Shen Kanyu to buy fresh fruits for him and Tiantian every day.

Gu Yansheng occasionally accompanied him to the supermarket, always blaming him for spending lavishly and buying expensive imported things, and he would not listen to him, always saying that you don't understand, Asheng, it's worth it.

Where is the value? The value is for Gu Yansheng and Gu Yutian.

Shen Kanyu could have eaten some of those warm meals made of fresh and expensive ingredients, but because of his casual remark, he never ate them again, which led to today's situation of not eating due to too much psychological pressure. Way to eat normally in front of him.

Shen Kanyu was not the kind of person who would get angry, he was just really afraid that Gu Yansheng would not be able to eat because of his existence.

He was just loving him in his own way, clumsily and carefully.

Tang Xiu heard Gu Yansheng explain the cause and effect clearly, felt a headache and a toothache, and even wanted to smoke a cigarette—even though he didn't know how to smoke, it was even more uncomfortable.

This is all nonsense nonsense.

Tang Xiu had a stomach full of swear words, but he was too lazy to scold. After pressing his temples for a while, he said slowly: "Every time someone approaches him and makes urgent movements, Xiaoyu reacts very violently, thinking that person wants to To hit him. I suspect it's a symptom of PTSD."

Gu Yansheng didn't know what PTSD was, but his heart sank for no reason.

"PTSD is post-traumatic stress disorder. The trigger is a major traumatic event, such as witnessing others or oneself being injured, or even being threatened with death. In various situations, I feel that the symptoms are more and more consistent. "Common symptoms include severe emotional reactions, traumatic scenes recurring in dreams, anxiety, hypervigilance, startle reactions..."

Gu Yansheng swallowed the soreness in his throat with difficulty: "So it's because of me...?"

Tang Xiu rolled his eyes and slapped him on the forehead: "Did you listen to me seriously? A major traumatic incident! Injury! Death threat! The monster you made is only for eating, isn't it good?"

Gu Yansheng said blankly against the forehead that was shot red: "Then?"

"There are conditions in Xiaoyu that are specific to PTSD in children, so it's very likely that some kind of major trauma in childhood was the underlying cause."

"Childhood?" Gu Yansheng immediately remembered what Shen Kanyu said before, when he was sick, he was kicked to the ground by his biological father.

"According to him, being beaten as a child is extremely common." Gu Yansheng almost squeezed out this sentence through his teeth.

Tang Xiu sneered: "Then I didn't run away. Parents who don't care about begging for a liver if the child has a heart attack, it's not uncommon to beat the child to death when he was young."

"En." Gu Yansheng gritted his back molars, turned his head to look at Shen Kanyu who was still sleeping in the ward, his face was expressionless, his nails had already dug into his palms in his clenched fists.

"Don't act like you want to eat people, have you ever been a monster yourself?" Tang Xiu stared at Gu Yansheng and said, "Tell me, have you ever beaten him?"

Gu Yansheng's eyes flickered for a moment, he lowered his eyes to avoid Tang Xiu's sight, and clenched his fists even tighter.

The answer is self-evident.

Tang Xiu's eyes suddenly turned cold: "When did you hit him, and why did you hit him?"

Gu Yansheng said in a shy voice, "When I was in school...I often got into fights with him..."

"Fight him? Will he hit you?"

Gu Yansheng was speechless.

Every time he had a so-called "fight" with Shen Kanyu when he was young, Shen Kanyu would never hit him, he would only curl up to protect himself, occasionally block a few times, and then said with a smile on his face that it's okay, you can continue, and after the fight is over Happy, smile when you are happy and don't be angry with me again, okay

At that time, Gu Yansheng thought he was provoking him to provoke him, so every time he did this, he couldn't help but get more angry, and his fists and kicks became heavier, until he was bruised all over his body before he stopped.

When he stopped, he got up from the ground three times, five times and two times, ran to the milk tea shop to buy the tea he liked, poked a straw and handed it to him, and said with a smile that the beating was over, let’s drink some tea to quench the fire .

That cup of tea was knocked over by Gu Yansheng most of the time.

Shen Kanyu would always be taken aback for a moment, then scratch his head and mutter in puzzlement: Why are you still angry? Every time my dad hits me, I'm not so angry.

Gu Yansheng felt that such words were inexplicable, so he called him crazy.

Shen Kanyu looked up at him, and said softly: A Sheng, can you stop calling me crazy? I'm not sick.

Gu Yansheng said that if you are not crazy, don't follow me anymore.

Shen Kanyu hurriedly said yes, I am, tears came to his eyes.

In fact, Shen Kanyu was really sick, and he had been sick since he was very young.

It was Gu Yansheng who made him sicker and sicker, and later even hit him when he was pregnant. Although it was just a slap, it was in public and it was for Su Tong.

After that slap, Gu Yansheng went home to pack his luggage and prepared to move out.

When Shen Kanyu saw him coming home, he immediately ran into the kitchen to prepare ingredients and wanted to cook for him, but he was only halfway through when he saw Gu Yansheng dragging his suitcase to the door.

Holding his heavy stomach, he ran out in a panic to stop him—a six-month-old stomach is actually not very big, but he is too thin, so it was extra hard.

Gu Yansheng didn't understand this, but felt that his pale face and gasping for breath were all fake.

Because his smile was exactly the same as before, brilliant and annoying.

He smiled and said, "A Sheng, we're all home, let's have a meal before leaving."

Gu Yansheng didn't even look at him, and said sarcastically, "A place with you can't possibly be home."

The smile on Shen Kanyu's face disappeared, his eyes were red, and he hissed like he was in the studio that day: "So where is it like home, is there a place for Su Tong?!"

Gu Yansheng didn't want to talk to him anymore, so he turned his head and turned the doorknob. He rushed over and grabbed his arm, insisting on him giving him an answer: "A Sheng, answer me! I like you so much, you can't do this!! "

Gu Yansheng looked at him coldly, and said almost word for word: "Are you going to make trouble like this? You still don't remember that slap?"

With a pale face, Shen Kanyu calmed down instantly, let him go, and stood there muttering the words: "I really like you, don't treat me like this."

Gu Yansheng slammed the door heavily.

Not long after that, when Shen Kanyu was less than eight months pregnant, Gu Yutian was born. The six-jin baby was as big as a palm, and it took him six hours to give birth after entering the delivery room.

There were many times when Gu Yansheng felt guilty and asked him insinuatingly why the child was born prematurely and what happened during the period when he was not home.

Shen Kanyu shook his head and refused to say a word, he only said that it was my fault that the child was born prematurely, and you can beat me, A Sheng, if you are unhappy, I'm sorry.

Gu Yansheng apologized for the slap, but Shen Kanyu still shook his head, saying that A Sheng was not your fault, it was my fault, and I really deserved the slap.

Gu Yansheng said that he left home that time because he was on a business trip, not because he didn't want to see him again, Shen Kanyu continued to shake his head and said it's okay, I know you have to leave sooner or later.

At that time, Shen Kanyu was not as trembling as he is now, but the damage was already deep.

It's even more bruised now.

Gu Yansheng felt the pain in his heart, the pain made him feel dazed, a little at a loss, thinking maybe it would be better for him to leave by himself, and he who pushed him into the abyss step by step, now wants to drag him back as his own I have it, is it just a dream

For his doubts, Tang Xiu scolded him on the spot. He couldn't remember what he was scolding, but he was right anyway.

Later Tang Zhen told him, A Sheng, you are a sea of little fish. A fish with wounds all over its body will definitely hurt when it comes into contact with sea water, but it will slowly recover only in the arms of the sea. If it leaves the sea, the fish is really hopeless.

If so, if he really still has a chance.

He wants to be a sea that only raises this one fish for a lifetime.